Think I'm heading for my third miscarriage in 9 months

(24 Posts)
FiremanSamsWife Thu 26-Dec-13 21:31:25

Am six weeks pregnant, and have started bleeding again. First miscarriage in April was a mmc, second one in October was very early only 4 days after finding out and now this. I don't know for sure but in my heart I know that it's gone, passed a clot and had some red bleeding.

I feel so utterly numb. I have a DS who is 2, and I know I am so lucky to have him but it is just so shit to be doing this again. I'll call the EPU tomorrow and see if they can fit me in. Only silver lining is at least I can get some tests done to see if its anything obvious, does anyone know what they involve?

Sorry, don't expect replies, just need to vent! Sorry to anyone else doing this too over Christmas x

Utterly Thu 26-Dec-13 21:32:57

I'm so sorry sad I can help with the tests I'm afraid, but I hope they are helpful.

FiremanSamsWife Thu 26-Dec-13 21:36:35

Thanks Utterly. Am off to bed now, eyes red raw and sore from sobbing! We'll see what tomorrow brings.

StupidMistakes Thu 26-Dec-13 21:42:53

I am so sorry for your losses. I just wanted to warn you that it's often the case that they can't find anything obvious wrong and tests can leave more questions than they answer.

bakingtins Thu 26-Dec-13 21:54:38

So sorry to read this. I had 3 MC over the period Sept12-June13 and it is really shitty, no other word for it. I hope you can get a scan tomorrow, if it confirms your worst fears then do come and have a chat on the RMC thread - we'd be happy to explain the procedure for getting tests. One thing to bear in mind right now is that getting 'products' (sorry - horrible word) tested can be really useful, so if you can either save anything you pass if you go natural/medical or ask for material from an ERPC to be tested then I'd do that. It was only after my 4th MC was tested (I'd had one in 2009 before the recent problems) and found to be chromosonally normal that I pursued the avenue that led to a diagnosis. I'd swallowed the 'unlucky' line for too long before that.
I hope that doesn't sound negative, I hope that you are wrong and that scan tomorrow says everything is ok, but don't want you to miss a chance to get some answers.

KatAndKit Fri 27-Dec-13 08:00:33

So sorry to read this, it is a horrible thing to go through.

for me, the testing involved a couple of blood tests, a blood test for my husband and also i had a pelvic ultrasound scan. In my case a blood clotting problem was diagnosed and my next pregnancy on blood thinning medication was successful.

FiremanSamsWife Fri 27-Dec-13 08:12:48

Thanks all, I did think the tests wouldn't reveal a huge amount, I've just been trying to hope it might help! I'm wondering if it might be hormonal, my symptoms of pregnancy slowly start to show and then overnight they go.

The bleeding has slowed this morning, its this waiting game I hate most of all.

Thank you for replying, I will call the EPU as soon as they open and hope they can squeeze me in x

ItsIgginningToLookALotLikeXmas Thu 02-Jan-14 00:12:55

Try not to be too pessimistic about the tests - they can throw up various things or at least rule some out. And come to mumsnet for help interpreting the results, and next steps! There are also additional tests you can have done privately.
You have had a horrible year sad. Like you, I had one child already and then started miscarrying - 4 in 18 months. I was reading this section tonight as thinking a lot about one of those babies, as I had the ERPC on New Year's Eve a few years ago. But by the next year I was pg again, and the next again ds2 was here. Things can work out and I really hope they do so for you. Lots of support here thanks

FiremanSamsWife Fri 10-Jan-14 07:33:16

Just an update, had my reassurance scan yesterday after steadily loosing brown and pink discharge and baby only measuring 5 weeks with a very slow heartbeat when I should be 8 weeks. So very very sad, have to wait for two weeks now to either miscarry naturally or go back for another scan to check the heartbeat has stopped so I can get an ERPC. So I'm now waiting for my baby to die again.

Thanks for all the kind words, next step is the recurrent miscarriage tests. I'm going to take a break from ttc for a while a few months and going to get fit an loose the extra 2 stone I'm carrying. When I'm feeling stronger and ready to go again I'll join the recurrent miscarriage thread. I send positive thoughts to everyone who finds themselves here, lets hope we all get there in the end x

Cybercat Fri 10-Jan-14 07:36:45

I am so so sorry. Ive played that waiting game with a slow growing/slow heartbeat and its bloody awful. I certainly didnt go to work at that time. Please look after yourself. Im really sorry.

bakingtins Fri 10-Jan-14 22:12:17

I'm sorry FSW I've been in that position weeks of limbo and of almost wishing the baby dead so it would all be over. It's a horrible thing to go through.
Lots of tea and sympathy on the RMC thread when you are ready.

Katiejon Fri 10-Jan-14 22:28:42

So sorry. I had a mmc and was scanned yet again before I was given medical management.
Waiting just seems to make it worse.

ShoeWhore Fri 10-Jan-14 22:32:14

fireman I'm so so sorry. Do look after yourself.

DriftingNameChanger Sat 11-Jan-14 22:19:58

fireman I'm sorry for your loss.thanks

FiremanSamsWife Sun 12-Jan-14 06:30:48

Thank you everyone. Felt ok the last few days but sitting here watching Shrek with my DS with tears rolling down my face this morning. Feels like we'll never get there after seeing yet another baby announcement.

I wish I could just do this one thing that everyone else seems to do so easily. Going to get myself to the doctors to get signed off work until this is all over. I worked through the last two but don't think I can this time.

So sorry for all your losses x

GoodnessKnows Sun 12-Jan-14 06:52:38

I've been where you are. My results were negative and didn't help. But my consultant suggested I take half a junior aspirin (I think) every day to thin blood slightly so that it could reach placenta more easily. I now have two children. My youngest is a gift from gd. So easy and has made what I went through (incl molar pregnancy) worthwhile.

MarchelineWhatNot Sun 12-Jan-14 07:19:34

Have you had immunity testing? I know that it is not routinely tested in the UK, but a lot of my friends in the US who had recurrent miscarriages had this testing done. They were then put on medication and subsequently carried babies to term.

I also second taking a junior Aspirin a day. There has been lots of success with this. One word of advice, though - if you do take Aspirin all through pregnancy, it is advisable to have a hospital birth as you may bleed more, as Aspiring thins the blood.

Good luck with it all x

bakingtins Sun 12-Jan-14 09:04:23

FSW I think a break from TTC for a while to recuperate a bit, get fit and gather your strength, is often a good idea. I would encourage you to use that time to look into testing though, if that's a route you want to go down, because it can take several months to get an RMC appointment and complete the process. As I mentioned upthread it would be very valuable if you can get products from this MC tested, the rest of the tests would be blood tests/scans which can be done (and in many cases need to be done) a few months down the line. I recommend Mary Regan's book "Miscarriage - what every woman needs to know" as a guide to the process, and there's also a good documentary called "Waiting for a Heartbeat" on youtube. It was immune testing as mentioned by Marcheline that eventually revealed my problem, but it's not normally done until you've been normal on the standard tests, and it's not generally available on the NHS.

FiremanSamsWife Sun 12-Jan-14 09:59:46

I've heard asprin can work wonders, and I'll ask the doctor about it, thank you so much for the replies. Did you take it while ttc or just once you get your BFP?

I can't understand how I've had one child and am now having such problems, although from what I've read its not uncommon.

Thanks bakingtins, the EPU have already sent forms away to get us referred to the clinic, they've said it'll likely be a 4 month wait and we're going to take that time to have a break. And I'll definitely ask for the products to be tested, assuming I can either save them or have an ERPC. I'll look into that book too, it sounds good. I finally told my nct group about it all and it turns out that one of them has also suffered 3 miscarriages and an ectopic before successfully being 7 months pregnant. She's been great and its so nice to have someone in RL to talk to who understands.

This forum is great, has been a life saver for those dark moments. Can't thank you all enough for taking the time to respond xx

FiremanSamsWife Sun 12-Jan-14 10:04:42

And sorry Marcheline, no I've not had immunity testing. I'll remember to ask about that once I get to the clinic and see what they say. If all other tests come back normal I will take that as the next step. I know this seems a silly question but will the nhs treat me for something (if needed) bearing in mind I already have a DS? Something that's been playing on my mind.

And hospital birth isn't a problem, I had a horrendous time with DS after pre eclampsia, bells palsy etc ending in a c section, so I'll be asking for an elective this time (if I ever get that far! )

bakingtins Sun 12-Jan-14 14:08:32

Yes you can still have NHS treatment if you already have a child. Having had one successful pregnancy rules out some problems (mainly anatomical ones) but others you can develop later, particularly immune issues which can be triggered by a first pregnancy and get worse with each subsequent one.

GoodnessKnows Wed 15-Jan-14 07:01:10

How are you, Fireman?
Hope you're as well as can be.

FiremanSamsWife Wed 15-Jan-14 07:55:13

I'm ok thanks Goodness, been signed off work until next week with the promise to get it extended if I need an ERPC. I'm ok as long as I'm around people, got a day onmy own with my 2 year today which is filling me with dread for some reason. He's a demanding little man and I just don't seem to have the energy to give.

So glad to hear you got there in the end with yours, I know if I eventually hold my little one all this pain will be worth it x

GoodnessKnows Wed 15-Jan-14 23:27:02

It really will and I remember thinking 'well it's alright for you, but it'll never happen again for me' when I spoke to others following my molar pregnancy and second miscarriage. It did. She couldn't be more perfect. Much easier than my little man. Lol who I love but is driving me insane at the moment! My stress levels are through the roof for other reasons.
Just so that you know, having had two ERPCs, they're fine. Woke up both times with a flat tummy and not feeling sick. Woke up feeling relieved not to feel sick .. and then sad as can be to realise why not. Physically fine. Sad going under the general though. Felt so final and was worried that they were wrong as still felt sick both times.

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