Miscarried at 11 weeks

(11 Posts)
Tina84 Thu 26-Dec-13 16:20:16

Two days ago, I found some spotting and instantly rushed to my local hospital. After an examination was told that there was no heart beat and the baby was around the size of 4-5 weeks, I was 11 weeks pregnant. The doctor suggested that I come back on the 2nd of jean for further examination, but haven't provided much further information than that. Since I started bleeding, but like a normal period.
What I don't understand is if the baby died at 5 weeks, why I was feeling morning sickness, being extremely tired and having general symptoms of pregnancy for the past few weeks? I keep looking back at the time when the baby was 4-5 week trying to figure out if I did anything wrong, it's heartbreaking. sad It is really upsetting that I only find this out now, 1 week away from my scan.
There are so many questions that I want to ask, but during this time don't feel I'll get the time to get all my questions answered at my hospital. If anyone has been through a similar experience any advice would be really appreciated. For example, can I expect to be examined earlier the next time I get pregnant, otherwise I'll be a nervous wreck for 12 weeks? How quickly can I try to get pregnant again?

bakingtins Thu 26-Dec-13 17:20:32

Tina I am so sorry you have lost your baby. It sounds like you have had a missed miscarriage, where the baby dies early on but your body continues to produce the hormones that sustain the pregnancy, so you still feel pregnant. It's often only discovered at a routine scan. NHS policy is if an embryo is seen that is before the point where they expect to see a heartbeat (6-7 weeks) then they rescan in a week to show there is no development before offering any management, even if it is crystal clear from your dates that the pregnancy has ended.
Since you are bleeding now you may miscarry naturally (I think there is something in the theory that once you realise there is a problem your body can 'let go') or if there is no development when you are rescanned you should be offered medical or surgical management. More on these options here on the Miscarriage Association site and a thread about how others have coped here
I promise you that you didn't do anything wrong. In the majority of cases pregnancies are lost early because of a random chromosome problem in the embryo that means it could never develop beyond a certain point. Your chances next time are the same as if you'd never miscarried - 85% chance of a successful pregnancy. Official guidelines are you are not offered any additional support in early pregnancy until you've had 3 miscarriages in a row (this applies to less than 1% of couples) but a sympathetic GP might send you for an early scan, or you can pay for a private reassurance scan for about £70-80. 8 weeks is a good time to be scanned, if you see a heartbeat at that point your chance of miscarrying falls to 3%. You are likely to be told you can TTC again after you've had one normal period, if you feel emotionally ready. There are lovely threads on the conception and pregnancy boards for TTC and pregnancy after miscarriage, as obviously you will be anxious next time.
Please keep posting, it can feel like an emotional rollercoaster in the aftermath of a miscarriage, and it helps to have somewhere to "talk".

Nishky Thu 26-Dec-13 17:27:59

Nothing to add to bakingtins lovely post, but I just wanted to say how sorry I am.

Tina84 Thu 26-Dec-13 17:40:25

Dear bakingtins, thank you very much for you kind words and advice, this sounds reassuring. I'll read through all additional material you recommended. Thank you again.

Walber139 Thu 26-Dec-13 17:45:34

Tina84 oh how feel for you...I'm so sorry you lost your little baby. I lost my last baby at 17 weeks, it was horrendous (in August). I've have been blessed with another chance, however I have not been offered an early scan, or any extra appointments.

We felt ready to start trying again, & unlike last time I fell first try. You will know when's 'right' to try again....I have found that following my miscarriage I am worried sick.

I'm not sure if this helps you or anyone else...x

Parsley2506 Thu 26-Dec-13 17:47:12

Tina, you have my empathy and sorrow for your loss. I also learned I had experienced a MMC at 11 weeks, with embryo dated at 6 weeks.

bakingtins explains it all perfectly, but I just wanted to add that it's pretty normal to go through the "what did I do wrong?" feelings. I went over every detail of my 6th week beating myself up for the bath I took, the coffee I had etc. etc. but as baking says it is not your fault.

I also had to wait a week for a second scan and ended up miscarrying naturally at home. Do read the thread bakingtins linked to, I found it invaluable and so much more helpful than the official nhs guidance, and keep posting here if you find it helpful. You will get nothing but support and understanding from everyone here.
thanks

Lottystar Thu 26-Dec-13 17:47:34

Tina, I'm so so sorry for your loss. I had an MC in October at 7 weeks, afterwards (having witness what passed - sorry if tmi) I reckoned the pregnancy probably never progressed beyond 4 weeks. Believing your pregnancy to be developing (as your body is cruelly showing all the right signs!) when actually it's no longer viable is horribly hard to accept. All those expectations and hopes are suddenly dashed and you feel like your body cheated you in some way. Bakingtins has given you fab information and I wish you every success in your future pregnancies. MC is common unfortunately but it's unlikely to have them consecutively. This is a great place for a bit of hand holding or advice, I found it one of the few sources of real empathy and support, family and friends could've awkward and say the wrong things, even with the right intentions. Give yourself some tlc and time to heal xx

katatonic Thu 26-Dec-13 21:22:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gwlondon Thu 26-Dec-13 21:47:17

I am sorry this has happened to you. I had a scan at 12 weeks that showed no heartbeat. I was told that the placenta was still attached and that produces hormones that give you pregnancy symptoms.

I don't know anything else except that my doctor told me I can try again after I miscarry and have had one normal period.

Be kind to yourself. You are not alone. Big hug. X

umiaisha Thu 26-Dec-13 22:35:47

Tina - I could have written your post myself :-( exactly the same thing happened to me on the 23rd.

I have been bleeding consistently since and have an appointment on Monday for another scan. I still feel pregnant, off certain foods, bloated and tired. Can't wait to get Monday out off the way and get some closure.

Tina84 Fri 27-Dec-13 09:12:49

Thank you everyone for your support and words of encouragement.

Umiaisha, I am sorry to hear that you are going through the same horrendous experience as I am. Since my post yesterday, I had a miscarriage and thanks to the support of my family and amazing advice I got on mumsnet, I was at least prepared what expect. Keep your support group close to you during this tough time, lots of hugs for our loved ones is what we need to help and ease the heartache a little. X

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