12 week scan Blighted Ovum :(

[jenny56]

Hi,
I was so excited for my 12 week scan at 12w+4d on Monday and was in total shock to find the sac was empty. I have had all the pregnancy signs, sickness and tiredness and thought everything was ok. My stomach even seemed to be protruding. Plus I have had no pain or bleeding which is so confusing. Its been so hard to take it in. Me and my husband were mentally prepared for having a baby during the weeks that seemed like years leading up to the scan and we couldn't wait to tell the rest of our family and friends. We had already told some people so telling them there was no baby has been so difficult, especially if they get emotional as that sets me off crying again.

I have another scan on the 19th August to make sure there is no develop and although I'm praying they could have made a mistake, I know in my heart at 12 weeks the baby should have been there. Also I know my dates are right as we were trying for a baby. If I haven't miscarried naturally by the 19th the option is to take tablets to bring on the miscarriage or I can have an operation to have it removed. I feel lost and empty. Not only have I been told the devastating news that there is no baby but I now have to wait for me to have a miscarriage naturally or have it surgically removed. I just can't take it all in :( I just feel all my hopes and dreams for this baby have been shattered and although I try and be strong I just feel cheated. My body has been telling me the baby is there and everything was alright, no bleeding or pain etc and normal pregnancy signs. But after the agonizing weeks of waiting and feeling rubbish there was no actual baby there. Its all been for nothing. The Dr has given me a sick note for 2 weeks so in the meantime I just have to wait for it to happen and I have the pads and ibuprofen at the ready. Nature can be so cruel :(

Has anyone else been in a similar situation and gone on to have normal healthy babies? x

[Bakingtins]

Jenny I am so sorry. It is a horrible shock, particularly when you had no inkling that the pregnancy was not progressing completely normally.
From a practical point of view, I'd suggest you check out the Miscarriage Association website and this thread

Emotionally it is very difficult. You need to grieve for the baby you thought was growing and all the plans and hopes you had for your new family. Be very kind to yourselves and give it time. It can be a bit of a rollercoaster, you think you are feeling better then something triggers off the sad/angry/bitter feelings again. I've found it enormously helpful to acknowledge the loss in some tangible way (plant a tree or shrub, release a balloon, write a poem, light a candle, choose some memorial jewellery)

Your chances of having a healthy baby in a subsequent pregnancy after one miscarriage are the same as they were in your first pregnancy. Figures for miscarriage are quoted as anywhere between 15-25% of pregnancies. It is sadly very common and I'm sure you will be surprised how many of your friends and acquaintances will turn out to have shared this horrible experience. The vast majority of people will go on to have normal healthy babies.

Keep posting - it helps to have somewhere to vent.