Recurrent Miscarriage Testing, trials and tribulations...Part 7!

(988 Posts)
squizita Fri 07-Jun-13 19:04:04

Hi all, carrying on from part 6. All kinicker-checkers, blood-testers, clinic-attenders and finger-crossers welcome. Nothing but love and crossed fingers...

squizita Tue 29-Oct-13 15:20:33

Dildoos welcome! Not glad you're in this situation, but glad you've found the support here. smile

Purple Sorry work are being crap. Mine are the opposite - changed my days off from 'pregnancy related' to 'sick' because my partial mole wasn't normal pregnancy grrrr. I wish there was some kind of booklet to hand to employers and say "do this or else".

Jbird waves! Totally understand the 'don't even talk about it until after testing' ... just come out of it today. Back to POAS and BDing. The tests have stopped me giving up TBH as I thought "do what the doc tells me". As it goes, Mr Rai told me to try again... so will do. Although completely bricking it.

Tiny, Baking & Butterfly waves! smile

Clinic news... knew they'd found something because this time it was Mr Rai and time to see the research midwife. Mr Rai thinks I'm barking mad, but nevermind!! He's very good (just in case any of you get him) - very thorough. As (he) expected I have non-genetic Hugh's, so I have been told to take vitamins + folic (he gently teased my love of the expensive one "own brand will do" hehe), 150mg aspirin from BFP and then heparin injections.
DH was congratulated on his fecundity and genetic make-up. Made his day. grin
So ... I'm at the front of the looong wait to get back on the roller coaster. Best get myself strapped in and buy some wee wee sticks! GULP. shock

Bakingtins Tue 29-Oct-13 15:28:55

Jbrd lovely to hear from you! I think they don't test swimmers if you get pregnant reasonably easily - there can't be a functional problem and any genetic issues on DH's side would be picked up on the karyotyping.
I've been round and round (and discussed endlessly on here) when to throw in the towel. We'd decided if the NK testing didn't bring anything up then we weren't trying again. Having drawn a blank on the standard testing and then lost a perfect embryo we were not prepared to "try again" on the same protocol. We've also talked about a time limit, I'm 40 at the end of next year, my youngest will have gone to school, we would be approaching a 5 yr age gap, I think that would be a natural point to call it a day. And lastly, if this pregnancy doesn't work out that's also it. 4 miscarriages in the pursuit of a third baby is enough. It's very individual though, and I think it's easier to give up if you have a family already, even if it's not quite the one you hoped for. Far from straightforward!
I hope your appointment in November brings clarity and a plan - if you have something to work with that makes it easier to rally yourself and try again.

TinyTear Tue 29-Oct-13 15:33:13

squiz i saw Mr. Rai as well back in early 2011

He was very professional and I like the fact he didn't say 'you are fat go and lose tons of weight' but instead he said it would be good if I could lose just 5% of my weight as it might give me a better chance but that he wasn't going to set any unrealistic goals or say that was the cause - as probably it was a series of factors

In the end all tests were normal - including one just after BFP in case it was something that changed in pregnancy - and I did lose just over 5% of my weight - so not sure what helped...

Bakingtins Tue 29-Oct-13 16:07:30

Squiz must have cross posted and missed your update. That's great that you have a reason and a treatable one. Buckle up girl! You can join me in the covered-in-bruises club. grin

LateBloomer414 Tue 29-Oct-13 20:25:32

Hi all, I'm post- St Mary's today as feeling good about it all. I had Dr Sujita who was very thorough and had a very gentle way about him. The sonographer saw my fibroids and was the first person to raise the alarm bell about them . They are going to a saline scan in 2 wks to rule anything sinister out- doc wasn't overly concerned but wants to rule anything out. I told them about trying IVF and he was happy for it to happen in parallel. We'll try naturally after 6 weeks as it coincides with DH getting the 'go forth and procreate' clearance from his oncologist. They took pints of blood!

Hello and welcome to the new folks!

Bakingtins Wed 30-Oct-13 07:20:18

Glad it went well LB how long do you have to wait for results? must feel good to be moving forward again. Hope Mr LB is doing well.

LateBloomer414 Wed 30-Oct-13 07:28:14

6 weeks for the bloods- next appt in mid Dec so hope to have the all clear then. I think the saline scan will produce the assessment in the moment so no waiting there. I'm participating in the Tablet study too so hope to have those results in about 2 wks. The waiting will go slowly I am sure- not quite the purgatory of waiting for the next scan but getting there! Mr LB is pretty well, but still fatigued. I thought he was going to fall asleep in the waiting room! We have a weekend away with some friends which will be such a welcome change of scenery. It will be tiring for him for sure but it will do us both a world of good. Baking, how are you feeling today? Hope no more fainting!

Bakingtins Wed 30-Oct-13 07:32:09

I was fine yesterday, thanks. Drinking my sugary tea and mumsnetting before attempting to get up - it's the new regime grin
What is the tablet study about?

LateBloomer414 Wed 30-Oct-13 08:53:07

That sounds like a glorious routine! Mine is now this: email with my team in APAC when I get up, throw some laundry in while getting breakfast together, back upstairs to give DH a feed, then shower and then to office. It's nice to be back in the office after weeks of being home. But I sure liked being in pjs all day grin.
The tablet study looks at the thyroid antibodies in women as there as been the discovery of a correlation between these antibodies and miscarriage (official name: thyroid antibodies and levothyroxine study). They just don't know what that correlation is yet. We've also agreed to a study that explores the genetic background of RM- they will take blood from me and DH as well as the umbilical cord or saliva from the baby we hope to produce (or tissue from the fetus if we aren't successful). In short form, it seems they will research the genre ration of auto-antibodies like antiphospholipid antibodies which are sometimes present in women who experience repeated losses.

LondonSuperTrooper Wed 30-Oct-13 10:46:13

Hi all. I hope you don't mind my joining you. I'm having my second miscarriage and would love done advice. I'll be 40 on Monday and was wondering whether I qualify for any testing on the NHS? My midwife said it's just one if those things but I'm planning to see my GP next week. But I'm not sure efts to do or what to ask. It took 13 months to TTC only for me to miscarry at 8 weeks sad

Any help or advice will be gratefully received.

LondonSuperTrooper Wed 30-Oct-13 10:46:55

Hello Tiny nice to bump into you here

JBrd Wed 30-Oct-13 11:27:49

London Welcome to the thread, and sorry that you have found your way here. It is all such a heartbreak, but you will find lots of lovely people and support here!

I'm not sure if you will be able to get testing on the NHS at this stage - normally, you have to have 3 mcs in a row before anything gets initiated, regardless of age. I think it really depends on how co-operative your GP is - I'd say definitely go and ask, but be prepared for rejection. Mine was always very hesitant when it came to this, I ended up getting more responses from the EPU that managed my mcs, so maybe it's worth asking them, too? After I had my 3rd mc, they were the ones who got the ball rolling, I never went back to my GP.
And even then, I have decided to get additional tests done privately, as the NHS ones are a bit 'basic' IMHO...
Hope that helps!

LondonSuperTrooper Wed 30-Oct-13 11:57:55

Thanks JBrd I'm seeing the midwife today as I need a scan to confirm the miscarriage. I'll ask her for tests etc. I hope that I can get testing on the NHS as we cannot afford any private testing.

LateBloomer414 Wed 30-Oct-13 14:43:08

Welcome London. Definitely ask if they will do testing - press them on the fact that it took you a while to conceive and that you are in the 40 zone so you really need to know what you are dealing with. It's hard to be your own advocate when in such an emotional situation( and let's be honest, I don't think any of us are at our best when receiving that awful news). So before you go in write down what you want to say or ask , or ask your DP to take over that part of the convo. It may not compel them to do the testing but it's certainly worth a try. So sorry you are going through this.

squizita Wed 30-Oct-13 16:50:57

London hi! As Jbird said, the epu and gynie ward at your local hospital can make recommendations which speed things up! GPs sadly sometimes don't avct so fast but if the hospital nudges them to do it, they're usually happy to sign the referral.

TinyTear Wed 30-Oct-13 17:10:50

Welcome London.

Hope you get a sympathetic GP

I just had my erpc at 11 this morning and am waiting to be collected to go home. Need some rest now... But I have some closure for this one and will hopefully try again soon

Bakingtins Wed 30-Oct-13 17:23:07

Tiny hope you are coping ok flowers
London good to see you over here. Hope you get a sympathetic hearing from EPU.

butterfly86 Wed 30-Oct-13 19:47:50

Glad your app went well LB and good luck!

Welcome London sorry you find yourself here sad

Tiny I hope you are managing as well as is possible hope you are resting thanks

Had a horrendous day today just so worried all I've done all day is check for bleeding I've had lots of twinges and am convinced its all going to go wrong I'm exhausted with it.

picklebum2011 Wed 30-Oct-13 21:13:52

Hi hope it is still OK to post. Been reading back over posts, so sorry London and tiny tear and others who are going through such hurt. St Marys seems a great place for testing. I was referred to qeqm in Margate as I am in Kent, Dr Ross and his team, has anyone had experience with them?
I have a question that I already know the answer to but just wanted to hold onto a slight glimmer of hope.... Well basically after our third mmc ending in erpcs (two, our beautiful daughter who is now three, then another mm). My husband was really against trying again said he couldn't see me go through all that hurt again, his words. We had a good chat and I told him that I will always hurt and will carry that with me till the day I die as you never get over losing a baby you just learn to move forward. I explained how I felt our family wasn't finished yet and how despite our losses I still felt a glimmer of hope in me. He said he wanted another baby too but was scared. We agreed to tentatively try again. My period was on the 2nd October and we had sex on the 10th October. I have a 28 day cycle, I'd worked it out that I would have been most fertile from around the 12th to 17th but we did not end up trying on those dates. My period was due today and as yet is not here, i have done three tests that are all negative so I'm trying to be realistic and stop this irrational hope that I may be pregnant.... Could I be? Sorry for long post.

Bakingtins Wed 30-Oct-13 21:19:13

Pickle it ain't over until AF shows her ugly face. Sperm can survive up to 5 days, so if you ovulated 15th or 16th it's just possible. It's tough being on the TTC rollercoaster.

butterfly today you are pregnant. Or "pregnant until proven otherwise".
The progesterone will not be helping - adds to the "wet" feeling that sends you running to the loo all the time to knicker check. Hang in there.

picklebum2011 Wed 30-Oct-13 21:27:38

Thanks baking, it is rough being back on TTC roller coaster ride. I googled (I know!!) And someone had commented on one thread and said if it had been ten days or more since trying then it is just a late period... Is this true?
Tiny hope you are home now and comfortable.

picklebum2011 Wed 30-Oct-13 21:28:37

Thanks baking, it is rough being back on TTC roller coaster ride. I googled (I know!!) And someone had commented on one thread and said if it had been ten days or more since trying then it is just a late period... Is this true?
Tiny hope you are home now and comfortable.

Bakingtins Wed 30-Oct-13 21:32:58

Well say it was 5 days after trying that you actually conceived, then you often wouldn't get a positive until 10-14 days post ov depending on how sensitive the test is. Negatives now doesn't sound that encouraging, but if AF doesn't show in the next day or so test again.

LondonSuperTrooper Wed 30-Oct-13 21:53:01

Thanks for the welcome smile
I am miscarrying and scan confirmed that this afternoon.
The only positive news that I have is that I had a super midwife who gave me a referral letter to the RMC clinic. I'm going to see my GP so that she can send off the referral for me.
At least now I have a glimmer of hope that something can be done to possibly avoid another miscarriage in the future. Yes I'm being v optimistic right now, I need to as I'm in a very dark place right now.

butterfly86 Wed 30-Oct-13 23:16:02

Thanks Baking I sometimes just need you guys on here to settle me down you know how it feels dh is great but he is terrified too understandably. Deep down I know it's the progesterone leaking but I can't help it I'm obviously pleased I'm on it but it's not helping the knicker checking situation! I think maybe today was bad because my last 2 mc have happened around this time.

Pickle- it aint over til the witch appears! Fingers crossed for you.

London sorry your mc has been confirmed sad but well done for being optomistic at such a shit time hopefully you get your referral through quickly.

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