Mumsnet Talk

Shelley just posted on your thread - sorry to hear your news -

I'm not going to work tomorrow and feel better knowing I have made that choice - there will be no medal if I go and only benefit to me and my mind if I stay at home - I have just emailed my lesson plans/cover which feels better -

Thanks for all support and hope everyone is ok -

Dora, i found out yesterday at my 12 week scan I've had a mmc. I need to ring the hospital tomorrow to find out what my options are as i wasn't given any yesterday.

I would take some time off, I've cleared all i can for about the next 10 days.

This was my 6 th, much wanted pregnancy. I've never had a mc before &i know Im still Im shock.

You need to look after yourself as you have 2 dc depending on you, work can wait.

Its so hard when you suddenly have your world turned upside down, i can't make sense of it all. Its like everything changed at 2.30 pm yesterday...

Take care. X

I have times when pain is normal the. Really bad but I'm guessing normal - it's strange as for first two days seemed ok -

Not sure about work tomorrow which is not helping my mind -

Was awake till 4 last night - so grateful for answers and this board as as best it can it makes it as ok as it can be -

Hope everyone else is ok -

Can't see who asked if I have children as on my phone but I have two young children, this is first miscarriage -

Get back in touch with the ward and get yourself checked if you feel unwell, Dora. That's what they are there for.

physically I got back to normal quite quickly so yes if you have a temperature and your bleeding gets worse have a word with the hospital. Keep taking your pain killers though.

How many other DC do you have dora?

I feel ill not sure when to worry - temp a bit up but sorry for tmi - but bleeding is worse and pain - possibly all normal for 3 days post the ERPC - just can't think straight? So any advice would be welcomed ? X

I know

thank you -

and dora it really isn't the physical pain that is the issue it is the metal pain that you need to take care of. That can take quite some time to heal. If you have had an ERPC then physically normal painkillers should be able to sort it. Sorry once again, a horrid horrid time for you ((hugs))

I am so sorry for your loss. I had a MMC in September and it was just horrific.

Would repeat that you shouldn't think that if you're feeling physically OK you're ready to be back at work. Look after yourself and take time to recover mentally too, it's a very traumatic experience.

I am so sorry you lost your baby.
Funny talks sense. Take some time off. Your body has been through a trauma.
Just because mc is common does not make it easy.

((hugs))

Funny - thanks for your post - the pain has cranked up suddenly very high this afternoon - just taken some codeine but can ring the ward of worried which I might if it keeps building - thanks for your kind words, it is permission to be still and take time that I need - may book a gp appointment for Monday - the hospital advised a follow up -

dora I took 2 weeks off work with my first MMC. Do what you need to do. You have lost a baby and need time to come to terms with it. I tried at first to pretend everything was fine, only for it all to come crashing down about 3 days later. Take care of yourself

Just updating no need to reply just writing as this seems better than not writing -

I feel so empty and sad - this is half term and can't even imagine working Monday but least of my worries -

Sad to read how common this is - thinking we were 11 weeks and had made plans and then it's gone -

I know I have been lucky enough to have children but this sadness still penetrates deeply -

Anyway -I'm sorry to read more and more stories I didn't realise the frequency of a missed miscarriage and I hope everyone is ok and gets the answers they need this week -

Glad you are home. Do hope you manage to sleep ok.

I have come home now - feel and look pretty awful but home;

Surprised by the level of sadness and guilt and other thoughts - but physically ok -

Ickle; good luck and if any symptoms appear just go back -

How are you doing?

sorry to hear this dora. I went though it twice and it is really not nice at all. Horrid shock the first time and it took me a few weeks to be able to function again. Look after yourself and hope you feel better soon

At the scan yesterday they said they needed to wait another week as a scan 10 days ago showed a heartbeat although it was measuring 6 weeks & I was adamant I was 10 weeks; they just said I had my dates wrong! They said a dr wouldn't do anything at moment without being 100% sure but I had a transvaginal yesterday & nothing was detected. So frustrated with these so called professionals.

Thank you for being so honest, will do with questions if you don't mind.

Will you be discharged today? Really hope you get some rest.

Sorry you have to wait, can you phone your midwife and ask if you can get an earlier scan, if you explain your anxiety/feelings -? It maybe worth a try -

In terms of the physical op/feelings it's actually just small cramps at the moment and light bleeding - my mind was/is worse was awake all night just thinking and sad -

Good luck and pm me if you have any specific questions I don't mind -

Oh love, so sorry to see this.

Be kind to yourself x

I'm sorry you've lost your baby. There is NOTHING you did at 7 weeks that caused your baby to stop developing, and your body hasn't let you down. Left to it's own devices it would at some point have recognised that the baby wasn't developing and started the process of miscarrying, in the meantime you were still protecting and nurturing. It is a horrible thing to happen but it is not your fault.
You will need some time to recover from this and the docs will sign you off for a while. Do tell a few people IRL, you need some support.

Hope the op went went in the physical sense & you have plenty of time to rest & recover. I know what you mean, apart from some light brown spotting (which I actually has with DD) I had no signs til my scan either. Just wish it was next Weds & have it all over with. Feels very strange that everyone's life is continuing normally but mine had changed dramatically in last 24 hours.

Take care & look after yourself x

Had the operation at about 10 and came round about 11ish - have been awake going over everything/anything since its half 3 now and the nurse is going to see if there is something she can get to help me sleep -

I just keep going through what I was doing at 7 weeks that may have contributed and how strange it is that your body lets you down - and why it would have let me believe I'm 11 weeks pregnant and not give any clues -

Thank you everyone that posted, I wish I was coming home with a broken arm or something visible to allow some time to be nurtured and cared about for something that can be talked about -

But as no one knows its just back to it -

In sept I was rushed for emergency surgery after scan showed ectopic- such a shock when you think you're just going for a scan and end up admitted! I've also already got a daughter and kept thinking thank god I've got one, but then it's also worse as you know how amazing it all is. Sorry rambling and hijacking your thread.
You'll be ok but nothing we can say will make it go away.
Take care x

Sending you lots of hugs.

Don't be thinking anyone's story is sadder to you, this is your story and that's all that matters just now.

My dh is like yours and when this happened to me it took the weirdest little comment to set him off.

Thinking off you.