Ectopic pregnancy support thread

(797 Posts)
tasmaniandevilchaser Sun 18-Mar-12 18:15:29

Hi everyone, this is a place for anyone who's had an ectopic pregnancy - whether you want to moan, cry, fret or just have a chat with other people who understand. I know there's lots of other good websites on ectopic pregnancies but after hijackingchatting with sunshine on another thread, I thought I'd start one here.

Well I'll get the ball rolling with my story - after a MMC in November (found out at the 12 wk scan that the baby had died at 10 wks) I was just getting myself sorted, having counselling, when I had the ectopic. I know I am lucky in that I have a lovely DD. Having had a normal pregnancy, I knew from the beginning this one was not good and as soon as I got a BFP I was down at the hospital.

After 10 days of mental torture, waiting around, scans, rescans, blood tests, it got too late for the methotrexate (they finally saw the ectopic in a scan on a Friday early evening and the methotrexate wasn't in stock hmm)

I finally had the surgery to remove one tube on the Tuesday. This was the end of February, at first I wasn't sure how I would cope, but I am just plodding on. I know I am lucky that it didn't rupture, but honestly I can't think of having an ectopic as being lucky. Especially after a MMC sad.

Anyway, come join me if you want to share your story, I have wine, brew and thanks

Hessy Sun 05-Jan-14 14:42:21

Thank you for posting this Over; I am crying reading it. Huge congratulations xxx

My ectopic surgery was a couple of days before Christmas and came three months after a miscarriage. I really need to hear success stories at the moment...

I also had a MC before my ectopic Hessy at 6 weeks, so ectopic was even more of a kick in the teeth as you know, and made me think even more that my fertility was well and truly shattered.

I hope you have lots of support and are recovering well thanks xx

Hessy Sun 05-Jan-14 18:05:02

I'm so sorry you had both too. I kept asking the doctors how I could possibly had both but they could only reassure me that it was a horrible coincidence. I'm taking even more heart from hearing of your success now smile

I feel like absolute crap today. Dreading work tmrw. They were great over mc but feel I've used up all my sympathy iyswim.

Riprap63 Sun 05-Jan-14 18:13:17

I had ectopic preg in 2001, rupture. I already had one dc.

Lost tube. Got preg again a couple of times, but ended up in m/c.

Gave up then got preg with ds. Took years, but it happened.

Cousin had dds with only one tube, there are lots of success stories.

I felt like crap for a while Hessy, it's still very raw for you...an extra awful time to happen as well over Christmas. But you will begin to feel better. I was quite sore physically as well for at least a couple of weeks.

I dreaded going back to work too, I know what you mean about using up the sympathy...but if you're anything like me I didn't want any sympathy...I didn't want anyone to ask me about it. My way of dealing with it was just to carry on as normal at work. I only told very very few close family about the pregnancy/surgery anyway and others still don't know to this day. If this pregnancy is successful then I will fill everybody in on our traumatic past 18 months but I didn't want the pressure/constant asking how I am, and that worked for me but everybody is so different.

I feel like my ectopic was yesterday, every little detail. I totally understand how you are feeling so feel free to keep writing away if you want to talk. Xxx

jerryfudd Sun 05-Jan-14 20:52:20

Sorry, only just discovered this thread and not yet had time to read through it all. Am sorry that all you ladies have been through what you have but just wanted to share my success story in the hope of giving you hope in what seems like a hopeless situation.

I suffered an ep in 2005. Knew I was pg and started spotting. Confided in work colleague who insisted on taking me to a&e. Tests confirmed I was pg but subsequent scan showed empty womb. Was admitted to ward wwhilst awaiting blood results. These then confirmed very high hcg levels so sent for immediate laparoscopy. When I came round I found out they had been unable to remove the tube via this so opened me up too (laparotomy) and removed tube. I was in a bad way for several months after as wound became infected.

Once recovered we tried again for several years and finally got a positive in 2008 however gp tests were negative so referred to gyne who found large ovarian cyst causing false positive. Cue another laparoscopy to remove and thereafter fertility tests. Outcome was that "next to nil chance of ever conceiving naturally" and referred straight for ivf. Started later that year. We're really lucky and first round successful (got positive test on Xmas eve). Early next year had early scan to check all in right place and confirmed they BOTH were! All went well and when they were a year old I found out that I was pg again - had beat the odds. Another early scan confirmed all ok and all went ok again.

Not the way I imagined getting my family would go but I know despite everything I am extremely lucky

Hello all,

I've been lurking on this thread for a couple of months now and I just wanted to say that I'm sorry we've all had to go through this. And to all that have posted their success stories, thank you - you've given me hope.

Well, basically, I had my right tube removed in 2007 as it had twisted on itself and ruptured - no ectopic, just "one of those rare things" according to the surgeon. It was a hell of a shock and very upsetting at the time, but I got over it.

More recently, last November (after six rounds of clomid) I finally got a bfp. Started bleeding a week later, went to the epu and they found it was an ectopic in my left and only remaining tube. I was lucky in that it had stopped growing, so I was monitored but they didn't have to operate or give me methotrexate.

Two months on and I feel all sorts of emotions: scared, sad, angry. I'm a bit too emotional and moody, cry at the drop of a hat and prefer to be alone as much as possible.

The icing on the cake is that a colleague confided in me that she's pregnant just after my ectopic - she kindly told me about a week after I told her what happened as she wanted me to know ahead of announcing it in the new year. it turns out our due date was a week apart. I know it's irrational, but it's really upsetting me. It's not her fault, of course, but I can't help but feel very jealous and bitter. I would have been 14 weeks pregnant on Wednesday.

I'm so scared that it's going to happen again. That I'm running out of time (I turn 35 soon). That it's never going to happen. So much fear I don't know where to put it.

Anyway. Sorry to rant. Just needed to share.

gemzyb1 Sat 11-Jan-14 21:43:43

Hi everyone. Think I need to join. I'm 6wks4days and the hospital think it's ectopic. I'm going back into hospital in the morning for second blood test to determine hormone level. I'm a bit scared really. And upset.
I was so excited at my bfp then suddenly it's gone.
Feather- my two best friends have just announced their pregnancies...due a few days apart. I felt awful sat there knowing mine probably isn't going to survive. It's a terrible feeling.
Anyway, will be lurking on here over the coming days as I think I'll need support.
Xxx

PoshPenny Sat 11-Jan-14 22:02:05

Hi ladies, I'm now so old the menopause is approaching, but just wanted to share with you that following an ectopic pregnancy in May 1993 which resulted in a ruptured Fallopian tube being removed, I went on to pop out two babies successfully (OK both were Em CS) in July 1994 and August 1995 despite only firing on one cylinder as it were. I was about 8 weeks I think.

I do remember having a go at the woman in the bed opposite who was weeping and wailing about her ectopic as if she was the only one who had ever suffered from this, and telling her to shut up and count her blessings as at least she already had a child and me and the other two women on the ward were wondering if we would ever have a child now we were missing various bits of our reproductive equipment... I hope those ladies did OK and went on to have babies too.

best wishes to all of you who are suffering and fingers crossed you too will go on to have successful subsequent pregnancies. Both times afterwards I was scanned almost immediately I found out I was pregnant to make sure the eggs had made it to the right place, which of course they had.

Chazel19 Mon 13-Jan-14 21:08:53

Hi,

Firstly I'm really sorry that you have all been through this. I have just been told that I have an ectopic at 5 weeks, after going for am early scan. Really disappointing as my GP gave me so much hope that it was a viable pregnancy, so the scan was a big shock. This was our first month ttc... I started to get shooting pains about a week ago, and had what I thought was a period two weeks ago before my first ever bfp!

Without sounding heartless, I am not grieving so much for the loss. As much as it is a loss. I feel gutted that I have been 'so unlucky' as the nurses put it, and so fearful that this will happen to me again... Or I will never fall pregnant again. Seeing all the other ladies with blooming pregnancies in the waiting room, whilst
waiting to be told if I needed surgery was hurtful. The pain is still raw but your posts help me to feel more positive.

Luckily they don't think I need surgery, and I am getting my injection tomorrow. They've strongly advised I wait 12 week before ttc, that seems so long away. Like us all, I am desperate for a baby and feel so heartbroken seeing other parents with their children and babies. As selfish as that sounds!!!

Take care everyone. X

talulahbelle Sat 18-Jan-14 19:43:59

Just a short post. February last year I had a corneal ectopic that ruptured, needed many units of blood, and was left with a horrible scar and a 6 week recovery period.

We had to wait 8 months, but I then had IVF, and I'm now 13 weeks pregnant. So not a natural conception, but still a pregnancy, and I hopefully it will continue to grow well.

tasmaniandevilchaser Sun 19-Jan-14 21:17:41

lovely to hear everyone's success stories!

hessy hope that you are feeling ok and going back to work went well. I had MMC and then an EP 3 months later, so I have an idea of how hard it is. It is especially hard when other people's pregnancies go so smoothly and are due around the same time as you. I smiled with gritted teeth many many times around them. The due date for the m/c wasn't fun sad but it does get better. I've got an 8 month old baby now, and it all seems a long time ago.

feather don't worry too much about running out of time, I conceived both my babies over 35, DD at 35 and DS at 38, with my past history I had all but given up on the 2nd DC. If you're really not feeling like yourself, it might be worth a visit to your GP. Mine was lovely and referred me for counselling, which I found really helpful (though not for everyone I know). I'd also recommend a holiday, we just went away in the UK for a couple of weeks, it really helped to get away and relax. Hope you're feeling better soon.

shallweshop Sun 19-Jan-14 21:35:50

Just want to add my success story too. I had 3 m/c and had been diagnosed with antiphosolipid antibody syndrome just before my 4th pg. unfortunately 4th pg turned out to be ectopic. I had my right hand tube removed. I was 39 years old and added to this DH was firing on one bollock after having one removed due to testicular cancer in his early 30's.

It took 14 months to conceive DD after the ectopic. By this time we were half way through the adoption process. I had to inject with clexane and take aspirin throughout the pregnancy but I had my baby girl 5 months after my 40th birthday.

It took us only 5 months to conceive DS at the grand old age of 42. Followed the same treatment plan as before and had another successful pregnancy.

Never give up hope!

Ruthho17 Fri 24-Jan-14 13:55:41

Hi all, had emergency surgery on December 5th, they removed my left tube along wig the ectopic pregnancy. I have been bleeding on and off ever since so at my follow up appointment on Tuesday they took my blood. They just phoned to say my hcg level is still high at 396 (8 weeks post op?!) I have to go back in next week for more bloods taking and if they have increased (0r aren't decreasing) then I will possibly have to have the MTX shot. Anyone got any experience of this? Baffled at what's happening as supposedly everything was removed during the laparascopy??
Thank you x

tasmaniandevilchaser Fri 31-Jan-14 18:30:14

hi ruthho sorry to hear that it's still dragging on, hard to get life back to normal when this is happening. It does sound strange, possibly they left some tissue behind? Hope all is sorted by now anyway

malona2 Wed 19-Feb-14 11:47:03

Hi. I found out yesterday that at 4.5 weeks my first pregnancy is ectopic. I am heartbroken. My hormones are quite low so the doctors are monitoring me (second blood tests are tomorrow). I'm 36 so I'm concerned with the effect this may have on my future fertility. I haven't told anyone that we were trying so I don't really feel I have anywhere to turn. I have a very close friend who has been trying for a few years and has had four failed IVF cycles. Any advice on whether to tell her? I haven't told work exactly what is happening, just that I may have to have surgery. How long have people taken off work with an ectopic if there is no surgery? I'm feeling physically mostly okay but just very emotional. I don't really know what to do with myself.

RoseB123 Mon 24-Mar-14 22:47:53

Hi. I'm 22 and found out my first pregnancy was ectopic at 7 weeks. I have endometriosis and I had the coil removed last year in October after it punctured my womb. I fell pregnant Christmas week, although I had no idea at the time as with all my issues I never thought it would happen. To say it was an accident is wrong, I'd say it was a miracle. My mother has terminal cancer and two years to live, so I was so looking forward to her meeting my babies before she left.
I was devastated when I lost it, and I had to take nearly a month off work after they removed the left tube. Even though it was key hole, I had internal stitches and they caused me so much pain. I returned to work last week and had to tell everyone I'd lost my baby and that I'll probably cry every time I take a miscarriage call (I work in the ambulance control centre). I have my period now- a painful reminder my womb is empty.
It's awful but the weeks leading up to it where hell- I could hardly walk, I was bleeding on and off and I spent most of the week in bed terrified if I moved, I lose it. The mental torture was horrific and I found myself thinking, if it's going to go, let it go, stop torturing me with a tiny bit of bleeding here and there and all this pain. My partner and I have since split up-he's 26 but feels like this pregnancy was ruining his life where as I felt like it was a sodding miracle. Not so much now though, since I have even further reduced fertility.
One minute I feel fine and the next I feel like I need to have a baby now. It feels so wrong to not be pregnant any more, I had symptoms so early on. I found this whole experience deeply painful and I send all my love to anyone who's had to endure the same thing. xx

Tranquilitybaby Wed 30-Apr-14 17:33:24

Hi girls I could really use some support.

I found out I was pregnant last Wednesday, we'd been trying a month but I had my period, although didn't feel right afterwards, was spotting etc so decided to test. Positive.

Fast forward to Sunday, after having HCG tests on Thursday and Saturday (which more than doubled but were low for being 6 weeks pg), I started getting bad back and left side pain. I rang the hospital who told me to go straight in. Had to wait for 3 hours on my own to be seen (DH was in A&E with Noah as he'd hurt his leg playing football). They decided to scan me and immediately saw the baby was ectopic in my left tube and I was bleeding internally. sad

I had emergency surgery Sunday night to remove it and my left tube too. Was very scared beforehand, as I'd googled and knew how serious it potentially was. At one point I was sitting absolutely still for over an hour waiting to be taken down, scared I was going to die.

I'm home now, v sore and v fragile emotionally. I know I was lucky but it doesn't really feel like that right now. Starting to grieve now and it's awful, I feel so alone.

x

Lianasdav Thu 22-May-14 19:07:19

Hello tranquil I see you posted in April about your ectopic, I am very sorry that you had to go through this.
This is my first time posting on this thread. I too had an ectopic in April, with surgery and right tube removal on the 12th. I know what you mean by feeling alone.
I am now pregnant again. Don't know how many weeks as I have not had a period since surgery. I have an early scan on the 4th of June, fingers crossed the bun is in the right oven!!
Hope you are feeling a little better and getting the support you need

Xxxx

Tranquilitybaby Fri 23-May-14 00:08:26

Hi Liamasdav

Sorry to hear you've experienced the same. I was told to wait three month before trying again, weren't you told that?

Hope the time passes quickly for you and the scan shows all is we x

Lianasdav Fri 23-May-14 10:18:29

Hi, no they said I could try again when I felt emotionally ready. After my surgery they told me I had endometriosis so I thought I'd best crack on and see if I managed to conceive again.
And lo and behold here I am again!
I'm not getting my hopes up though, will take each day as it comes.
Xx

vintagelife Sat 28-Jun-14 20:51:12

Hi everyone, just wanted to ask whether anyone else had experienced this; I had keyhole surgery for ectopic (on right ovary) at the end of march and have recently started ttc. I have recently had pain on my left side the day after intercourse. Its more of a niggling, constant pain than shooting/bad pain. I 'm so worried all the time, especially as we're meant to be going away on holiday next sunday. Also now i'm tracking my ovulation I feel like I can feel it when I ovulate, whereas before the ectopic I never felt a thing. I don't know whether its me paying more attention to my body, or related to the operation....anyone had this? xx

Caitmous Sat 28-Jun-14 21:20:16

Hi Vintagelife,

Sorry to hear about your ectopic. I had right Fallopian removed because of an ectopic pregnancy in Dec and have been ttc ever since. I definitely feel twinges and pains since the surgery, but often in the side of the tube I lost. Not sure why. Very possibly, like you say, because I am much more conscious of everything since the ectopic.

Sorry not to be more helpful. Fingers crossed for you. Lots of success stories on this thread...

PunkyBubba Sun 29-Jun-14 09:57:25

Hi vintage and caitmous, always sad to see newbies on the thread, but this thread is what gave me hope when I had my right tube removed last October after a ruptured ectopic, and when I posted I got some support which made me feel less alone. It may be quiet now, but I think there are always lurkers to support if needed.

Anyway, to answer your question vintage I also started feeling when I ovulated after the ectopic. I have read since that they don't know why but a lot of women have reported the same. My cycles were messed up for a few months after my ep, and I do remember feeling aches and pains around my ovaries at various points in my cycle that I never used to have, and even ended up in the GP's surgery convinced I was having another ep when there was very little chance I was pregnant at all. Monitor the pain though and if it continues without improvement I would go and see the GP for peace of mind at least.

Just to add some good news I am now 25 weeks pregnant, and all going well, when I thought last October this would never happen.xx

Caitmous Sun 29-Jun-14 15:04:10

Congratulations PunkyBubba, brilliant news. Xxx

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