Recurrent MC--Testing and beyond--Part 5 continues here

(1000 Posts)
LAF77 Mon 02-May-11 09:23:42

Here is the list of us on the thread and where we are in our journey through RMC. Nearly 4,000 posts in a year, so mark your place for the next thread.

Part one Part one

Part two Part two

Part three Part three

Part four Part four

STARTING TESTING
LOLA78: mc1 Dec 07 (6wks), DD Oct 08 (problem free pregnancy and natural birth), mmc2 Nov 10 6wks ERPC at 10wks, mc3 Feb 11 at 7wks - suspected ectopic but mc naturally, mc4 mar 11 at 5wks (started 75mg aspirin from a week before bfp) - hospitalised for excessive bleeding and clots. Now referred for testing at local fertility clinic, we have started having blood tests and am on 5mg folic acid.
SCOOTERCHASTER: DS Oct 08 (managed for SVT heart from 35wks), mc1 Sept 10 (7wks), mc2 Dec 10 (9 wks - hb @ 8wks), mc3 April 11 (7.5 wks, hb day b4 mc).
HAIRYLIGHTS, age 42, MC1 (Jun 10, very low HCG, suspected ectopic, methotrexate), MC 2 (Nov 22 2010, MMC,ERPC, no heart beat at ten weeks, fetus 8 week size), MC3 (MMC - Medical Management, Feb 13 2011, MMC at 7 week scan). Waiting to TTC
PANDA 3MMC, no.1 (embryonic loss - empty sac) 7weeks, no.2 at 12 weeks, no.3 at 8 weeks. Awaiting raft of tests for recurrent MC
CLAIREDELOON Age 38 1st mmc, development stopped approx 5 weeks (2007), 2nd mmc development stopped at approx 6 weeks (2009), 3rd mc development stopped at 9 weeks after seeing hb at 8+3 (2010). Bicornate uterus, starting testing Feb 2011.
NOTSOBARRENBROOK Age 35. 1st mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2009), 2nd mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2010), 3rd mmc @ 11 weeks, development stopped at 6 weeks 3 days (March 2010), 4th mmc @ 5 weeks (August 2010). Possible adenomyosis, awaiting hsg and results of testing from St Mary's.
MILKYWAY2007 Age 28 - DD age 3. 1st MC Oct 2009, 6 weeks. 2nd MMC March 2010, 11 weeks (baby passed away at 7 weeks). 3rd MC July 2010, 6 weeks. 4th MMC 24 Jan 2011, 9 weeks - no amniotic sac, baby measured 7weeks 4 days, no HB, had seen a healthy HB at 7 weeks. Blood clotting, hormone, genetic karyotype and shape and health of uterus checked and all clear. High dose folic acid prescribed.
LUCKYFOR2 Age 32 - DD age 5. DD age 3. 1st MC May 2010 found at 12 week scan passed away at 9 weeks. 2nd MC September 2010 natural at 8 weeks. 3nd MC January 2011 at 16 weeks, saw hb at 13 but no hb at 15.5. All tests have come back clear. Going to take Aspirin and Progesterone in next pregnancy (will be on Promise trial) currently ttc.
IGGI999 - Age 40, 3 year old DS. 3 MC last year, at 6, 8 and 8 weeks. Last two had hb detected. NHS blood tests came back clear, except for presence of antinuclear antibodies. To take aspirin for this. Going to see Shehata in May as think steroids are needed.
CONFU3ED - Age 35 1st MC 1998 14 weeks. DD age 11. 2nd MC July 2009 5.5 weeks. ERPC Twice. No tests. 6 months Clomid 3rd MC January 2010. The foetus sent for testing - came back fine. Been referred to recurrent MC clinic at the hospital for tests, waiting for appointment. Was told I have PCOS through a scan but never diagnosed.

UNDERGOING TREATMENT
HAVINGKITTENS Age 41 - MMC1 Nov 07 8wks (discovered due to bleeding at 10.5wks) ERPC, TOP1 for TS21 Aug 08, TOP2 for TS21 Feb 09, TOP incomplete, ERPC performed, Genetic Counselling & tests confirmed no chromosome problems with us, "just bad luck ", MMC2 Feb 10 5.5wks (seen at 8wk scan, no bleeding), MMC3 May 10 (as MMC2), RMC testing at UCH, no cause found - empirical 75mg asprin & vit D + early & regular scans for next pregnancy, MMC4 No fetal pole seen at 6.5 wks, follow up scan 10 days later, told of MMC, then "Something" spotted so instructed to wait another week before they would allow ERPC, ERPC a week later, waiting for NK Cell test results from Mr S on NHS, taking 75mg Asprin, Vit D, Pregnacare Plus (w/Omega 3), 5mg Folic Acid (been taking since 1st TOP to try & prevent TS21 or similar issues), NK Cells levels almost double what they should be. 25mg Prednisone from ovulation - CD1 or if BFP then 'til 12 wks and then weaned off 'til 14wks plus Progesterone pessaries from BFP - 16wks, Folic Acid, Omega3, Vit D - 12wks, Asprin - 20wks.
CRYSTAL5 Age 38 - DS age 4. 6 m/c 1 at 11 weeks, 5 at 5/6 weeks. Ok blood tests, under Endocrinologist for Hypothyroid
LADYBEE 37, MC1 (5wks), DS (2), MC2 blighted ovum discovered @ 8 wk scan, MC3 natural @ 9 wks following hb seen at 7 1/2 wk. PCOS previously diagnosed, Factor V Leiden heterozygote discovered in recent testing. Treatment with aspirin (from BFP) + clexane started at 6 weeks. MC4 MMC @ 8.1 wks (discovered @ 11 wk scan) following hb seen at 6+6 wks. Consultant suggests aspirin + clexane to start at 4 weeks, plus progesterone pessaries. Management of MC tbc.
DIGITALGIRL Age 32 - DS 2.8 - 4MCs since ttc#2. MC1 Nov2009 @5wks. MC2 Apr2010 @6-7wks. MC3 Oct2010 @7-8wks. MC4 Mar2011 @8wks. All natural, except MC4 managed with ERPC for karyotyping. Clotting tests normal. DH & I genetically normal. On Metformin for mild PCOS, plus 75mg aspirin, Pregnacare Plus & 25mcg VitD3. Diagnosed with high NK Cells (1.25) after MC4. Starting TTC in May with prednisolone from ovulation and will add cyclogest once pg. Under care of Mr S.
PUREEQUEEN Age 34, MC1 (7 weeks Jan 08) MC2 (6 weeks March 08), DS born (prem) 2009, MC3 (9 weeks Oct 10). MC4 Jan 2011. First 2 natural mcs latter 2 mmc/ERPCs. Chromosome test MC4 showed she had a genetic abnormality (cri du chat). Karotyping for me and DH fine but with "increase in length on satellite of short arm 13 and 15" (??) . Also have endo &septate uterus. Now TTC and will take aspirin and progesterone.
LAF77 , Age 33, MC1 (7 weeks Apr 10) MC2 (5 weeks Sept 10) MC3 (9 weeks Dec 10). All have been natural mcs and number 1 and 3 were embryonic . No children, First appointment with St. Mary's in April, second round of bloods in May, with results in June.

PREGNANT
MATTSMAMA Aged 41. 1st MMC November 2004. My DS (who I love with all my heart) born 2006. 2nd MMC July 2010. 2 chemical pregnancies September and October 2010. Under Dr Shehata and got BFP on first round of treatment for high thyroid antibodies and high killer cells.
BANANA87 Age 30- 1mmc@7 weeks, DD (2), 1 mmc 6 weeks, 1 mc 7 weeks, Going to try aspirin and progesterone as per consultant. Clotting bloods normal.
MUMMYABROAD Age 36, 1DS (2.9), 1MMC Mar 2010 (@14weeks) Ashermans diagnosis and treatment Nov 2010, Started TTC Jan 2011 BFP on Cycle 2 EDD 4/11/11. Heartbeat seen at 10 weeks.
GLITTERYBITS 1 anembryonic MC (12 weeks), unexplained infertility, 1 round of clomid, currently pg and terrified!
JUSTMEE Age 21, MC1 (7 weeks), MC2 (6weeks), MC3 (5weeks) currently pregnant with 4th pregnancy using clexane injecting 20mg a day
LOVELYBUNCHOFCOCONUTS Age 23, 1 MC (13 weeks), 1 MMC (10 weeks - growth stopped at 7), 1DD born 2008, PCOS diagnosis, bi-cornuate uterus. EDD 03/10/11
LOVEMYSLEEP Age 39, 1 mmc, dd born(now 5), 2nd mc (9wks, 2days), 3rd mc (9wks, 3days) and 4th mc at 5 wks. All tests on NHS came back clear. Currently undergoing treatment with Dr.Shehata for very high natural killer cells - aspirin, progesterone, steroids, omezaprole and one intralipid infusion completed.

GRADUATES WITH BABIES!!
LUNATIC dd1(4) 2 mmc (8 wks) dd2 stillborn (32+5). Seen at St Mary's. clotting problem, pg #5 aspirin 150g daily. Ds1 born 9/2/11 c/s @ 35 wks
STILLFRAZZLED Age 35, DS1 (3.6yo), 1 mc @ 5 weeks Jan 09, 2nd mc @ 9 weeks March 09, DS2 born @ 35+3 on 04/01/11 with Intra Uterine Growth Restriction but currently home and doing well.
MUMATRON Age 28 2 dc then 4mc, 3 @9weeks 1@5weeks, tests showed possible free protein s ishoo. dd2 born 06/01/2011, aspirin, claxane and high dose folic acid through pg.
JULEZBOO Age 29 1 mc @ 14 wks, DS1 (8yo) 4 mc @ 5/6 wks, DS2 (3) 2 mc @7 wks... DS3 (14/01/11 @35 wks) Dx with Factor V Leiden and Septate Uterus. Clexane and Aspirin throughout pregnancy and progesterone with DS3.

igggi Mon 02-May-11 10:27:36

Hi everyone. Good wishes to everyone today smile

igggi Mon 02-May-11 10:27:37

Hi everyone. Good wishes to everyone today smile

digitalgirl Mon 02-May-11 16:43:20

Bookmarking.

Well done for sorting LAF you do know there's an MN legend that threadstarters are blessed with extra special TTC luck?

kittens any poas action from you yet?

Havingkittens Mon 02-May-11 17:38:16

Hello! No, not yet. Well, erm, I did, but shouldn't have blush. Too early yet. Been feeling quite ropey, got really bad shakes today and can't work out whether it's the Prednisolone or pg. Every other time I've got a BFP I've had a couple of really shakey days so who knows but I don't feel any other symptoms. I'm only on CD25 so far - 3 tablets left in the pack so I'll do another test on Wed morning I think as I have an appointment with my GP in the afternoon. He has been away and the other GPs have been drip feeding me my prescriptions which has been really annoying. It'll cost me a fortune this way so I'm hoping my GP will just do me the script for the whole amount. So far they've given me 15 Cyclagest which considering you're supposed to have one a day for 16 weeks is going to skint me if I have to pay full prescription price for every 15!

I hope the new thread brings lots of luck and babies! xxx

luckyfor2 Mon 02-May-11 20:02:51

Well done on the new thread LAF. Let's hope this is a good one for all of us. x

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Mon 02-May-11 21:28:31

Hi everyone, marking my place smile

kittens can you get one of those payment plans for your prescriptions? I think if you need more than a certain amount you can pay a set amount that will save you alot of money compared to the £7odd every time. Ask at your GP surgery if you think you may benefit. Will be posting that book weds/thurs I think smile

LAF thanks for the new thread, hope it brings luck to many more this year smile

Any potential newbies reading this, if you need any advice on RMC, this is the place to be. Best thread on MN grin

Havingkittens Mon 02-May-11 21:47:45

Coconuts I think I will be fine as long as I can get my GP to sort out my prescriptions. I took the prescription request from Dr S in to the surgery as a prescription request and I suspect that because the other GPs don't know me they are being conservative with my prescriptions. Thanks for the suggestion though. Worth knowing about if they are still awkward. My GP is very sweet and helpful so hopefully all will be sorted once I see him. Thanks for sending the book too. Whenever you get a chance, don't put yourself out! x

pureequeen Tue 03-May-11 09:45:47

Hi everyone on the new thread. Comiserations to everyone starting back at work after a long weekend (or longer!).

Some sad news for me - miscarried last week, sitting alone in a pokey hotel room on a work trip. Very early (earliest yet - I think just 5 weeks and as my sister would say "why are you upset, it wasn't a real baby").

It is just all those horrible "what if" thoughts - is it my endometriosis? Was it another chromosome problem? Was it because I hefted my overnight bag down 7 flights of stairs at Bank station because the escalators were out?

I was doing everything to the book (eg progersterone, asprin, zero alcohol etc etc etc). What now? My next appt at the RMC clinic is in June. Do I wait a cycle before TTC again? Anyone have any views on that? I don't buy the dating thing, I know exactly when I ovulate etc so no need to wait a month just to date things.

Anyway, back to work now.

Hope everyone else having a better time and good luck to the TTC and pregnant ladies, wishing you all the best.

Havingkittens Tue 03-May-11 10:45:02

Pureequeen, I'm so sorry. You poor thing. Have you had all the test results back from the RMC or were you about to embark on testing and became pregnant in the meantime? I know it's compelling to want to get pregnant straight away but maybe it's worth holding out to make sure there is nothing more you can do to improve your chances?

I got pregnant for the 4th time whilst waiting for my first RMC appt and it didn't work out, the 5th time I was trying asprin & Vit D, I've waiting 6 months to start TTC again so that I could try and reduce my risks further and have, in that time found out that I had raised NK Cells so I feel there is possibly more hope for the next try. Do you think it may be worth waiting a little, just to see if there's anything else to try?

I'm sorry you were away and alone. Was there anyone you could confide in there? I hope you've had company and TLC over the bank holiday weekend. Take care of yourself. x

pureequeen Tue 03-May-11 11:23:39

Thanks kittens. The only thing I haven't had yet is a 3D uterus scan and day 1 progesterone blood test - everything else (incl karotyping) is OK, or at least not significant.

Think I might book in for a private appt with Mr S as that is the absolute last thing left for me to check out.

It was so awful when it happened - was at night, by myself (not travelling with a colleague) and then had to run a 6 hour meeting the next day with people whom I didn't know at all, standing at the whiteboard hoping that my overnight pad would hold out. Totally surreal and I am now thinking of packing in this working lark.

Have had some pretty serious chats with my husband about what is the point of me working my arse off if I am miserable.

luckyfor2 Tue 03-May-11 15:43:07

pureequeen what terrible news sad, I'm so sorry you've had to go through this again, life is just not fair and to have to go through all of that on your own with nobody to talk to or be there must have been just horrible. I've just noticed on your stats that you have a septate uterus, could this have been the reason for such an early mc? Not that it makes it feel easier but just trying to work out why this could have happenned again. Thinking of you. So so sorry. xxx

digitalgirl Tue 03-May-11 15:50:54

pureequeen I'm so so sorry too sad. It's particularly sad when you're on your own, no matter how early or 'used to it' you are. You did very well to continue working under the circumstances, I hope you are resting now. Even if you feel physically fine, you should take a break from work and give yourself some room to grieve (or at least not have to worry about work). I totally sympathise about feeling like you did everything right (I took aspirin, pregnacare and no caffeine/alcohol). But you definitely didn't cause it by carrying anything heavy. Please don't think that.
I would also suggest booking an appt with Mr S. He'll test you for whatever's left including NK Cells, Anti-nuclear antibodies and Thyroid antibodies. Have you had a full thrombophilia screening done, or just been tested for Anti-Phospholipid Antibodies? Has anyone ever suggested surgery for your endo or septate uterus (I don't know much about it, but wondered if it was an option)?

Also, I know it's very easy to want to keep TTC straight after a mc, which is fine if you've only had one or two. But with a history of rmc I think it's always best to wait at least one cycle to allow your body to rest. There's a small risk of miscarrying again whether it's because your nk cells are still high or whether its because your hormones will be out of balance I'm not sure. If there's anything we try to do when ttc after mc its to minimise the risks, no matter how small.

I've picked up my drugs. kittens I'm paying private and 4 cycles of prednisolone plus 2 weeks of cyclogest (had to order the rest in) has set me back a whopping £100 shock. Mind you, I dread to think how much I've paid out for pg tests, opks, acupuncture, pregnacare and private consultations...

LAF77 Tue 03-May-11 19:04:23

Oh pureequeen my heart goes out to you. How sad to have a miscarriage in such a way. That is my worst fear about MC, just how you described, alone and away from home. It nearly happened to me on my third MC in Dec, but the full effects didn't start for another couple of days.

Of course, it was a real baby to you, all of your hopes and dreams about your family's next stage of development when you got the positive test. People just don't know what to say because RMC is not very common, so they try and brush it away, because it isn't their body and their hopes, and there are no answers as to why it happens multiple times to some of us. I can't believe that there aren't any reasons for 5 MCs, it is just that medicine doesn't know what they are yet.

I don't know what to say about what to do next, other than take some time out if you can. I didn't and it drove me to despair in the following weeks. I'm sure that the MC has nothing to do with carrying a heavy bag up the stairs. I stopped all exercise at the gym (and sex), took all of the vitamins, cut back on caffeine, and alcohol and it still happened to me three times. Where were you being treated at? Which clinic was looking into your history?

I'm terrified about trying again and getting the next positive test. I don't know if I could cope with the fear of MC again. Somehow we do, but it does change you as a person.

Lots of love, and if you feel like ranting and raving, I'm here to listen.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Tue 03-May-11 20:55:14

purequeen so sorry to hear of your loss and under such lonely circumstances sad You are so brave to have carried on working through the pain, emotionally as well as physically. Lots of love from me, take time to feel better, don't rush things x

Havingkittens Tue 03-May-11 21:42:16

Gosh Digital, I guess I should count myself lucky I'm on NHS! Talking of which, I am a chump! I went to see my friend today who has a young baby - first visit, which I've been plucking up the courage to do for the last 10 weeks, but that's another story. Anyway, she reminded me that once pregnant you get free prescriptions on the NHS so I cancelled my Dr's appointment and decided to wait until either I know I need my 3rd cycle of Prednisolone or I am pregnant. I can't believe I hadn't even thought of that. D'oh!

Pureequeen I think getting to see Dr S would be a really good idea if you can get your GP to refer you or afford him privately. When I was at the first NHS RMC, the hematologist refreshingly said "No, it's not bad luck. Having 1 or 2 miscarriages is bad luck. There has to be a reason for 4 Miscarriages, we just don't know what it is." Now having had a result back from Dr S confirming raised NK Cells it gives me something to work with. Some sort of hope at least, even if it doesn't end up working out for me in the end. I hope you're doing ok this evening. x

igggi Tue 03-May-11 21:53:51

Purequeen so sorry. And sorry you had to go through the first part of this alone, hope we can help with the rest of it. So sad to hear this.

igggi Tue 03-May-11 21:55:38

Regarding prescriptions, move to Scotland where they are free! Though come to think of it free anywhere if you have underactive thyroid, which some of you have.
I'm going to be so peeved at having to pay for my Dr S prescription (assuming he gives one to me and doesn't tell me to feck off with my useless eggs) when I pay nothing for NHS ones!

confu3ed Tue 03-May-11 22:36:43

So sorry Purequeen, and i hope you are looking after yourself. I know how you feel as I had to go away through the miscarriage I had a couple of years ago and found talking to customers whilst in agony almost impossible. Holding down a stressful job whilst going through miscarriages is so hard. I don't think it matters how far along you were, it was a pregnancy and to loose it, no matter how early on hurts psychologically. Your sister sounds as sensitive as mine, but I guess unless you go through mc you just don't understand and cannot empathise.

Pretty much all test results have come back as normal, only one left to come in. The nurse I spoke to told me that I am just unlucky and the chances are that next time we will be fine. Not convinced though, but I don't think I will be until I actually give birth! Not sure what to do now regarding ttc again

Lola78 Wed 04-May-11 10:16:38

So so sorry purequeen for your loss. I hope you are able to take some time out from work to get through the grief. We are all here for you xxx

luckyfor2 Wed 04-May-11 12:41:56

Still thining of you pureequeen. Sending lots of love. x

Confu3ed its good news all your tests came back clear but know how you feel as its hard when theres nothing to fix. Have they suggested you take aspirin or progesterone?

milkyway07 Wed 04-May-11 14:20:07

Sorry for your loss pureequeen. What a horrible experience, and I hope you are now surrounded with your loved ones. I started bleeding at work with three of my miscarriages - by the third one I was too embarrassed to tell anyone and go home, as I felt like a complete idiot and thought people would think I was stupid for trying again. It's crap that all of us have this horrible thing in common sad

confu3ed Wed 04-May-11 21:49:46

Luckyfor2 - The clinic that did the tests is an EPU not a RMC so I am a bit confused about the whole thing as I spoke to a nurse to get the results who told me that the consultant will write to me to confirm that everything is OK and may or may not refer me for a hysteroscopy but she seemed to think that was unlijkely. I feel frustrated with the whole thing as I thought I had been referred to a RMC not an EPU who really do not do much in the way of testing. I think that as I have only had 2 RMC and 3 in total that they do not think that there is an issue and keep using the word unlucky. I feel like screaming YOU THINK?!!! Worst thing today was I went back to see my GP who dealt with me through this miscarriage as I am having issues sleeping, she is bloody pregnant and asked me if anything had been stressing me out over the past few months, I mean is she for real?! Apologies for the rant but sometimes I wonder if they teach bedside manners at med school!

Havingkittens Wed 04-May-11 23:30:45

Confu3ed, it's good that your test results came back clear but I know the paradoxical feeling of disappointment when you feel there is no solution to be offered. It really does stink that they make us wait for 3 in a row before doing anything more involved with testing.

I'm feeling rather fed up. Pretty sure I have period pain. I did an internet cheapie test again this morning and it was negative too. I phoned up Dr S's midwife again today too as I've not been getting on well with the side effects of the Prednisolone. It seems most people don't have too much problem with them, so I don't want to frighten anyone, but I've been feeling pretty horrible on them personally. She told me that I should take the First Response test 10dpo and that if it came up negative I could stop the tablets if they were making me feel bad. First Response are supposed to work 6dpo but she said if I wait 'til day 10 to be on the safe side then I'll be pretty certain I'm not pregnant. I have one more pill to take tomorrow but may do a test to see if I can skip it, although it feels like there's a pretty good chance I may come one before I take the test. Knowing my luck though I will do the £8 test and then start bleeding just as I pull my knickers up! It sounds like a good plan for the next cycle at least (hopefully there won't be too many before I get a BFN), but at the moment I'd spend the £8 on a test even just to skip the last tablet.

The weird thing is that I was on Prednisolone for about 4-6 weeks about 7 years ago as I had Bells Palsy (That was fun, I can tell you! Just the thing to have a month into dating my new boyfriend - with whom I am celebrating my 7yr anniversary this week!) and I had no ill effects at all. Wish that were still the case. My granny has taken them on various occasions too and said they made her feel great!

Havingkittens Thu 05-May-11 08:26:24

Well, I didn't need to take my test, or my last pill. Fingers crossed for next month then...

I guess at 41 it's a bit much to expect to get lucky first time, even though it's often been pretty quick for me. Spending the day with one of my oldest friends' 10 week old baby hasn't really helped with the disappointment factor though sad

luckyfor2 Thu 05-May-11 09:05:37

Oh god confu3ed I can't believe that, how horrible I bet you were completely gob smacked! There are so many issues with rmc, obviously the grief and depression that comes straight after along with the anxiety and desperation of another pregnancy and dreaming of a successful one. So theres no surprise you're having trouble sleeping. Living is hard in every respect when you have gone through what all of us have, it's just so hard. Is there a rmc near you that they could refer you to. Could you possibly speak to your consultant direct and tell him/her how desperate you are for help. The one thing I have learnt from this experience is that you don't get anywhere without shouting and screaming for help. I am truly sorry for you and hope you can work out which way you want to go. x

Sorry things haven't worked out kittens, I guess when you're used to getting pregnant first month it's abit of a shock to get a BFN, I've always got pregnant v.quicky so know how you must be feeling. It sounds like you're having a horrible time on the prednisolone and typical that its effecting you now of all times when like you say you were fine on them in the past - great just what you need! It's heartbreaking seeing friends with new babies and I'm sure that knocked you back abit but I bet your friend really appreciated seeing you. Hopefully soon you might be able to join her in happier circumstances.

Didn't sleep a wink last night - got another scan this pm.

Havingkittens Thu 05-May-11 11:24:58

Ooh, good luck Lucky. Is that 7 or 8 weeks now?

I was thinking, maybe there is something in what others have said about Prednisolone delaying ovulation. Maybe I need to continue with concerted shagging for a good few days after my peak next time! Was a bit tricky last time as it was Easter weekend and we were at my OH's family place. Never really feel that ease when his mum and nieces and nephews are all running around!

igggi Thu 05-May-11 12:25:27

Not the best day for you HK, to say the least. Sorry sad
I have a friend in rl who takes steriods when pg, she said they had a horrible effect on her so you are not the only one. Presumably, after my appt, I will be joining you on them next month!

igggi Thu 05-May-11 12:25:27

Not the best day for you HK, to say the least. Sorry sad
I have a friend in rl who takes steriods when pg, she said they had a horrible effect on her so you are not the only one. Presumably, after my appt, I will be joining you on them next month!

Havingkittens Thu 05-May-11 13:17:46

Yes, it looks like next month with be a month of empathy for a few of us. Digital will be starting hers too. Hopefully you'll be luckier than me! I have read of lots of people being more or less fine with them.

Oh and just to cheer me up, today I got a flyer from the local children's centre, where I went for my first two booking in appointments with the midwife in my 1st and 2nd pregnancy about their term planner for all the baby and play groups they're running. I called them a few weeks ago to ask them to take me off their text update list, which they did but they forgot to take me off the posting list. Grrr! Not very timely. They were very apologetic and have promised to sort that out now.

I had another niggle too the other day. I don't know whether to bring it up or just let it pass as I know it was unintentional, but when we were getting a lift home the other day from a bank holiday BBQ from my OH's brother and partner who have a 5 year old SIL was asking us how we felt about the stack of family holidays (went away with OH's entire family for a week at the beginning of April) and bank holidays that we'd had one after the other from our perspective, by which she meant, and pointedly addressed us as "Those of you without kids". She knows about all of our losses and struggles and had spent at least some of the day listening to me complaining about severe stomach ache and heartburn due to the steroids which I suppose I had to learn to deal with taking if I wanted to give myself any chance of success in having a child. My OH said it did bother him too but he really thought that she didn't mean to be thoughtless, just was tired and overwhelmed by how demanding her little one had been over the various holidays. I am wondering whether to just send her a little email saying, "I know you didn't mean anything bad by it but do you think you could reconsider before saying things like that in the future?" or should I just let it go as she is normally quite sensitive and asks me how I am. What would you lot do?

Havingkittens Thu 05-May-11 13:19:54

Erm, sorry about my punctuation. Feel free to breath at any time during that epic lack of full stops blush.

igggi Thu 05-May-11 15:10:04

I don't think I quite understand - did she mean had you enjoyed being away with whole family since you didn't have children yourselves? (ie any chance she was being sympathetic?). I'm not sure if I'd say anything, if things are normally good. Friend of mine,knowing it was my due date that day, didn't bring it up, talked about how difficult it was when you have two, and asked if I could pass on ds's clothes to her (I am still hoping I might need them myself!). She is normally lovely though and I think she was just overwhelmed with her own life, so I'll try to forget it. OTOH, I have a friend who made a dismissive remark after mc#2, and I haven't spoken to her since. Depends if out of character or not, I suppose.

Havingkittens Thu 05-May-11 16:21:47

I think it was more of a "lucky you, you don't have to spend your whole bank holiday pandering to your child" type of comment. I suppose like your friend, she was just overwhelmed with her own life.

I too fell out with someone who I thought was one of my best friends after the due date of my 3rd loss. I apologised that I'd not been in touch much and had been a bit self absorbed because the due date was coming up and it was upsetting me. She didn't mention it in her reply email so I asked if there was an elephant in the room. I don't think that went down too well. Then a couple of months later I had to apologise again for being rubbish about being in touch because as well as the passing of that due date to contend with, I was also really stressed about my mum's health as she has cancer and the chemo was making her ill and that my grandmother had fallen down a whole flight of stairs and I was worried sick about her. I got an email back telling me she was sick of hearing about my family's health problems and that I was not the only one having it rough and that I had been of little support to her recently. There's nothing like a crisis to show you how wrong you can be about some friends!

milkyway07 Thu 05-May-11 16:46:44

Can I quickly ask all of you ladies who have high NK cells - did you get a cold or flu type illness in early pregnancy with all your pregnancies? I have come down with a cold/cough again - the last cold I had was when I was pregnant in December, and then lost the baby in January. Just seems that I get a cold every time I get pregnant. I've also lost a few symptoms I had, so thinking this is another one lost. I don't understand why I am getting a cold every time I get pregnant. Any info please?

luckyfor2 Thu 05-May-11 17:28:36

milky can't believe I've just read that, I got terrible achy joints for two days and sore throat the day after I got a BFP and felt like my symptoms were slightly masked by it. God I really did feel so bad, but my consultant told me that your immune system is low when you are pregnant and it is nothing to do with anything else, just a coinsidence. I did have terrible flu with my dd and everything was fine then! Don't worry about it, so far I am okay (but obviously don't feel safe in any way!)

Kittens it is awful what people can say, I don't think they try and be hurtful but like you say they just get wrapped up in their own lives. Not sure if I would say anything this time but its hard to say as I don't know her. If you think it would make you feel better and she would understand then it would certinly clear the air.

Scan okay thanks girls, doubled in size and measuring correctly, just 7 weeks so a very long way to go and the weeks go so slow!

igggi Thu 05-May-11 20:14:05

Lucky that's such a relief, really pleased.
Milkyway it isn't over yet, pointless to tell you not to worry but you know everything may still work out perfectly!.
Havingkittens, I would be cross at that comment, I think people just turn off their sensitivity button sometimes. I don't find out if my friends don't have lots of sympathy for me because I just don't talk to them about it - I might talk about a test I'm having but not about my feelings. It's so much easier to talk to someone else who's had a similar experience.

igggi Thu 05-May-11 20:14:06

Lucky that's such a relief, really pleased.
Milkyway it isn't over yet, pointless to tell you not to worry but you know everything may still work out perfectly!.
Havingkittens, I would be cross at that comment, I think people just turn off their sensitivity button sometimes. I don't find out if my friends don't have lots of sympathy for me because I just don't talk to them about it - I might talk about a test I'm having but not about my feelings. It's so much easier to talk to someone else who's had a similar experience.

milkyway07 Thu 05-May-11 20:35:22

Thanks lucky. Good to know I am not the only one who suffers from colds early on. I had a terrible cold/flu with my daughter too, but much later on, at around 6 weeks. Understandably paranoid here! Also congratulations on the scan - brilliant news.

kittens People can be very insensitive sometimes without meaning to be cruel. Hope you are okay now.
I tend to avoid alot of people for this reason. It's quite sad, but I have totally stopped meeting whole groups of people and family just incase someone asks me "when are you thinking of having the next one? You better move on, X is getting older now"....Only close relatives know about our struggles for another baby, and I don't feel I should have to justify myself to people who don't matter about why I haven't had a baby yet.

milkyway07 Thu 05-May-11 20:39:29

Thanks igggi. I hope it does this time!

digitalgirl Thu 05-May-11 22:30:05

Not much time to post but just wanted to say boo to kittens af arriving. Still waiting for mine.
And yay for lucky's scan.

Have been on far too many rides today. Exhausted.

LAF77 Thu 05-May-11 23:05:13

just checking in. Been a bit all over the place. DH had to go in for planned surgery for blocked sinuses this morning. I almost couldn't bear to let him go, as I start imagining the worst, that I'll never see him again. He's fine and I went to see him after work, but it makes me realise how RMC has changed me. I'm always expecting the worst outcome in all situations. I didn't want to leave his room and I hate the fact that he is sleeping in a hospital tonight and not with me.

A work colleague asked me today why I seemed slim as I told him over a year ago that we wanted to have a baby. I told him that I lost 3 pg last year and I felt really bad for asking, but you have to be careful what you ask people as you might not like the answers. MC is hidden away from view in society and I will bring it up if someone asks me a direct question. I'm not going to lie or brush it under the carpet with a vague statement about "we're still trying" as that isn't honest about the pain that I have been through.

Time to get to bed and wait for morning to come so I can have DH back.

luckyfor2 Fri 06-May-11 09:01:39

LAF I'd be the same if my husband had to go into hospital, I often go in to my DC's room at night to just check they're still breathing - something I haven't done since they were tiny and just constantly thinking the worst. RMC definately changes your life and view of things and good for you for making a point to your coleague I think sometimes it just catches you off guard but like others I see very few people at the moment and the thought of seeing people since my last mc fills me with fear and panick.

milky try and stay positive. Very hard I know but it is better for you and your body to stay calm than it is to be stressed. Thinking of you x

Havingkittens Fri 06-May-11 11:52:13

Milky I have had colds in some pregnancies but not all of them. I just assumed it was because your immune system was not as strong as usual. I've not had any achey or fluey type symptoms. I know it's hard not to worry after what we've been through and that it makes you hyper aware of every little twinge or "not feeling right" more than you would ordinarily. I can only suggest taking one day at a time and doing your best to relax or try and keep yourself busy doing nice things. Also, don't forget that if you're being treated for NK Cells your immune system is very active to it's no surprise that you haven't had a cold since your last pregnancy when your immune system was compromised. I don't think I've had any colds or bugs for a while other than when I've been pregnant. The prednisolone will also be suppressing your immune system too so you will be more likely to catch cold.

LAF77 I'm quite candid, like you. I don't see why I should have to make excuses or pretend nothing's happened. I was with a friend last weekend who is going through the menopause and having quite a hard time with it and was finding it frustrating that women seemed to be expected to go through all sorts of trials and tribulations quietly so as not to make anyone else feel uncomfortable. It's frustrating having to make excuses and feeling like you're being judged for being quiet, or avoiding certain situations, or having to put on a breezy and flippant front when people ask about your intentions to have kids. Often I do just tell it how it is. I do try not to be too over sensitive too though, and remember that some people just don't really understand that things aren't as straight forward as we would like them to be. The SIL remark did irk me because she is very much aware of my situation and also went through fertility problems of her own before having IVF to have her son at 41. I have a feeling that if I did mention it to her she would be mortified and very apologetic so I think I'll just let it go. If she says something similar again I will ask her politely to think first next time!

milkyway07 Fri 06-May-11 14:33:44

Just had a phone call from my doctor about my Vitamin D deficiency. Apparantly there is a very limited supply of high dose tablets and the injection in the UK so it will be a bit of a mission to get it! I don't know whether this is because so many people are deficient that they have run low or if they hardly view it as a problem so don't manufacture in high amounts? Very strange. I also told her I was pregnant again and she seemed shocked that I had tried again so quickly and even said "well that was quick"..hmm. That made me feel a bit uncomfortable and embarrassed - is it wrong to try again so soon after a mc? I tried the waiting, and it didn't work.

I have also started drinking full fat milk at least twice a day because vitamin D is needed for calcium absorption, and figuring I have low amounts in my body already, goodness knows I may be deficient in calcium aswell.

LAF77 I too can say that having RMC's has left me thinking the worse in everything. Like lucky I check my DD is breathing through the night. Sometimes if my husband is having a lie-in, I will go and check on him that he is ok. I guess that it has left me feeling that life is very fragile.

hairylights Fri 06-May-11 16:46:28

Hello everyone. Posting and running. I just got a bfp. confused

igggi Fri 06-May-11 17:06:11

grin

Havingkittens Fri 06-May-11 17:56:47

Ooh, congratulations Hairylights!

hairylights Fri 06-May-11 18:01:50

Thanks. I have an appointment with the gynae/obs department on Tuesday and I am going to see what they say then about 1. test results (which should be in) and 2. what I can do to prevent miscarrying again (if there is anything).

luckyfor2 Fri 06-May-11 18:34:06

good news hairy smile

Lola78 Fri 06-May-11 20:03:57

Great news hairy, wishing you a sticky one this time.

LAF77 hope your DH is doing ok after his surgery.

I'm still hanging on in there - should be around 6 wks tomorrow and have had no more spotting since that tiny episode last Saturday. Really thinking about going to see my doc about possible early scan or hcg blood test to see how things are progressing (or not). I still haven't let rmc clinic know as DH is due to have his semen analysis on wed and I don't want that to be cancelled as we had a month long wait for that appointment (and still don't know if this pregnancy is going to be ok or not).

LAF77 Sat 07-May-11 08:11:31

Yay, hairy and I'm glad things are still ok Lola

DH is home and recovering, so I'm happier.

mia1972 Sat 07-May-11 08:34:27

Hello - I am new to this thread...

have just miscarried my second baby in the space of 5 months, the first time was last Dec, this time 8+3, there was no heartbeat... I was also in a hotel room on a work trip abroad - it was really horrible. I was told there that would be best for me to fly back to the UK and deal with it here and I ended up having a natural ms at Heathrow airport the minute I arrived!

I am now 39 years so I decided to see a private consultant...Can anyone reccomend any of the followig:

Dr Raj Rai (Zita West Clinic)

Alternatively Mr.Taranissi at ARGC, Dr. Hassan Shehata, Dr. Amin Gorgy at Wimpole Street & Yau Thum at the Lister (these last 4 docors all do NK cells testing as well as other testing).

My concern is to find a doctor that will test for everything that is available and will not focus on one issue only (whilst I would like to get NK cells testing I would like the doctor not to just focus on that)....

Any reccomandation ?

Thanks ...

igggi Sat 07-May-11 14:00:52

Hi Mia. Sorry about your mcs.
I think all doctors would run a full battery of tests - it wouldn't really be in their interests not to.
I'm not an expert on the doctors, mostly I have heard of people on mumsnet going to see Lesley Regan (St Marys) or Hassan Shehata. But I've heard at least one person speak positively of Dr Gorgy, too. You won't get NK cells done at St Marys though. I suppose in terms of a "good" doctor, we probably just rate the ones that lead to us walking away with a baby! I am planning to see Dr Shehata myself. If you have the money I think seeing someone after two mc is sensible, as you know the NHS doesn't consider it a problem till you've had 3.

digitalgirl Sat 07-May-11 22:54:17

congratulations hairy very best of luck this time round.

mia I would suggest reading both Lesley Regan's book and also Dr Alan Beer's book 'Is your body baby friendly?' as both of these books will cover everything that has been researched on recurrent miscarriage to date. St Mary's won't test you for NK Cells, so if you wanted to get that tested as well as everything else I would avoid Raj Rai as he is one of their consultants (although I don't know if he personally suscribes to the immunological causes theory, so he may test for them). After my third miscarriage I had all the same tests for rmc at my local hospital and UCH that they do at St Mary's (apart from the TEG), when all of these came back clear and I miscarried a fourth time I booked a private appointment with Mr Shehata. He took into account my previous results, and tested me for a further three immunological conditions. I was found to have high NK Cells, and I will be starting treatment this cycle. I can't speak for the others on your list, but Mr S and the staff at his private clinic have been very helpful. He is a PCOS expert as well as a rmc specialist and qualified physician so takes a look at your whole medical status. He prescribed me metformin for PCOS when the nhs dismissed my concerns.

As for me, I finally got AF yesterday. Luteal phase is still 15 days long and no spotting prior so looks like body has officially reset itself. Just the long wait for the egg now. Potentially not till CD25, unless Metformin has any effect in shaving a few days off.

mia1972 Sun 08-May-11 08:55:18

Hi Digitalgirl and thanks.

I have just read Lesley Regan's book and now will order Dr Alan Beer's book.

I'll think it through another day or so and then I'l book an appointment ...

Good luck with this treatment with Doc Shehata I really hope it brings you a healthy baby. For myself the bleeding this time seems to be a lot less than the previous mc probably because the embryo was a lot smaller so I am hoping that my body will reset itself sooner as well...

All the best

igggi Sun 08-May-11 14:04:34

Hello. Having a panic about my imminent appointment with doc S. Can anyone who has been tell me, do they give you forms to fill in before you go in, ie should I arrive early? On the website it says appointment takes 20 mins which seems awfully quick. Assume I won't have a scan if I'm out in 20.
Just so determined to get the most out of this. Bet my mind goes blank when I'm there and I can remember no dates etc!

igggi Sun 08-May-11 14:04:35

Hello. Having a panic about my imminent appointment with doc S. Can anyone who has been tell me, do they give you forms to fill in before you go in, ie should I arrive early? On the website it says appointment takes 20 mins which seems awfully quick. Assume I won't have a scan if I'm out in 20.
Just so determined to get the most out of this. Bet my mind goes blank when I'm there and I can remember no dates etc!

digitalgirl Sun 08-May-11 19:43:35

iggi a lot is discussed 20 minutes and that doesn't include having your bloods taken which is taken by a nurse. I wrote down my entire reproductive history - dates of when everything happened, and also a massive list of questions to best make use of the time. I didn't feel as though my appointment was rushed as he allowed me to ask as many questions as I wanted and was very thorough with his answers. He also said I could call anytime with further questions. I hope it goes just as smoothly for you. Good luck.

digitalgirl Sun 08-May-11 19:45:54

And there aren't forms to fill in - he does that for you as he's going through your history. The only thing I had to do was my signature to authorise the rest of the payment.

igggi Sun 08-May-11 20:53:58

Oh thanks for that Digital. Have worked self up into a state about it. You know for once I don't think I have many questions as I've kind of lost hope about it all. Maybe seeing doc will change that (which is scary in itself actually). Hope your egg makes an appearance soon smile

Havingkittens Sun 08-May-11 23:25:40

igggi, I was worried about all the same things, as it's always the case that your mind goes blank just as you want to make the most of your opportunity. The good thing is that his secretary and midwife are both really helpful so you can always give them a call afterwards with any questions or concerns. He sees so many of us with similar problems that I think he knows all the the questions that may be raised and so is probably used to being able to cover everything concisely within the 20 mins.

Best of luck with it.

hairylights Mon 09-May-11 18:35:06

Hi all. We get the karyityope and clotting results tomorrow and the complaints lady has suggested to the head of department that we
must see her in person.

For the second time in a row I'll be turning up for a follow up appointment newly pregnant again confused

hairylights Mon 09-May-11 18:36:14

Karyotype. Sorry for typo.

luckyfor2 Mon 09-May-11 18:58:39

Hairy don't worry one bit about being pregnant at your appointment. If there is a genetic problem (which is extremely unlikely) there is nothing they can prescribe to help and if anything comes up re. clotting they will be able to prescribe something straight away as you have only just found out. I know how you feel but in most cases they don't find anything anyway and just tell you to try again. I'm guessing I've just told you stuff you already know but try and relax...wishing you lots of luck tomorow. x

Welcome Mia sorry you find yourself here and that you have had such a horrible time. It sounds like the girls are giving you lots of good advice. The two books suggested are a must for anyone who has sufferred recurrent miscarriages. I hope you get some answers.

kat2504 Tue 10-May-11 09:10:05

Hello ladies I would like to join you as my gp has agreed to refer me to gynae to get the testing started. My most recent mc was just over a week ago so still feeling quite shit but glad that something is going to be done this time.
Perhaps someone will be able to tell me what to expect when I first get referred and what sort of testing they start off with. Will I be waiting a long time do you think?
hairy very pleased to see you have good news and fingers crossed that this will be the lucky one for you.

hairylights Tue 10-May-11 12:15:44

Hi Kat and welcome. Sorry for your loss.

I was told that they will take bloods 6 weeks after a third miscarriage. The NHS will test for blood clotting disorders and for any genetic disorders that you or your partner may carry.

Test results take six weeks to come back, so you are looking at knowing more in about three months.

I've just had my results. I don't have any blood clotting disorders and neither of us carry genetic disorders.

Had a long discussion with the consultant (head of department gynae/obs) and her opinion is it's likely to be genetic issues due to the age of my eggs (for those who don't know I'm forty three).

I'm pregnant again now and I have got a scan booked for 7th June at 8 weeks - but I am not sure if I'll be attending or not. I want to avoid the 'will it be ok/won't it be ok' stress that I've had for the last two pregnancies, with scans at 6, 7, 8 and 10 weeks.

The consultant says for the future (should this not pan out ok) then IVF would be an option, but only with donor eggs, as I am able to get pregnant very quickly and easily.

So today I feel really quite low about things. Partly for having had to go back to the hospital again - I never really ever want to go there again, I hate the place.

I'm not really one for wailing 'it's not fair' but it's not. It's so unfair to be able to get pregnant quickly but that the last three have failed. It's so, so unfair.

igggi Tue 10-May-11 17:46:25

Had my appointment, waiting now for NK cells to come back and a follow-up appointment. Told not to conceive this month which is a bit worrying as we have been trying - stopped now though!

igggi Tue 10-May-11 17:46:27

Had my appointment, waiting now for NK cells to come back and a follow-up appointment. Told not to conceive this month which is a bit worrying as we have been trying - stopped now though!

pureequeen Tue 10-May-11 18:31:17

Hi all and welcome to our new ladies. So sorry for posting and running last week but was away with my family and have not been online.

I really appreciated all the messages of support.

In answer to a few questions, my septate uterus is being investigated further (I made the mistake of googling it...grim reading! Has anyone else had this investigated - is surgery the response in the UK?) and I have also made an appt with Mr S so I am pursing NK testing in parallel with my NHS clinic - both appts are next month. mia I think you were considering doctors - I have also heard good things about Mr Taranisssi. I have to wait 4 weeks between calling and getting a private appt with Mr S.

Welcome kat. my experience with NHS testing is that it will really depend on your clinic. From first appt to getting ALL the tests back will be about 12 weeks - made longer by a few administrative cock ups, not at all the fault of the Drs or nurse practitioners who have been very sympathetic and caring.

Laf I think it was you who told a colleague what was happening when he commented on you being slim. Good on you. I had almost the identical conversation with DS's swimming instructor who commented on how thin I was looking and how did I manage to lose weight in just a couple of weeks. I said losing a baby helps or something along those lines and told her everything that had happened. (NB I am NOT thin by any stretch of the imagination, thanks to 5kg weight gain with every first trimester). I am also remarkably frank at work and will be using it as one of the reasons I want to cut down to 3 days/week - am preparing my case this week, have taken a few days holiday to think about things.

Thinking of you hairy. it is so so unfair - I agree. iggi keep us posted on your results.

Hello to everyone else I have missed. (going to be off line again for a few days - heading away again). Look forward to hearing from everyone when I'm back.

freelancegirl Wed 11-May-11 10:17:41

Hi everyone, I am lurking and reading - just don't have anything to post until I get an appointment with Dr S and start ttcing again, and who knows when that will be. But just been alerted to a new piece of research on raised thyroid antibodies that some of you might be interested in. There are lot of medical speak but essentially it concludes that:

What is already known on this topic

Thyroid autoantibodies are relatively common in women of reproductive age

Thyroid autoimmunity might be associated with adverse pregnancy outcomes

What this study adds

In women with normal thyroid function and thyroid autoantibodies the risk of miscarriage is more than tripled and the risk of preterm birth is doubled

Treatment with levothyroxine can halve the risk of miscarriage in women with normal thyroid function and thyroid autoantibodies

Here is the full report:

www.bmj.com/content/342/bmj.d2616.full

Good luck with testing everyone, and sorry to be a lurker with not much to say at the moment. Am sure at some point I will be back here in full force! xx

Julezboo Wed 11-May-11 21:31:33

Popping by to say hello ladies! Lots of new BFP's congrats to you all. I will catch up with part 4 later tonight.

I have NO time to post much anymore... I wouldnt change it for the worl but my boys are very trying at the moment, older two fighting, Oliver has milk allergy and reflux and doesnt seem to sleep longer than 20 mins. Wearing me out tbh and I have been dx with PND sad

I will catch up with part 4 and post a longer post later x

luckyfor2 Thu 12-May-11 15:26:07

hairy sorry your meeting with the consultant didn't go as planned. It is very unfair that you can get pregnant easily and then the worse has happenned three times and I totally understand why you wouldn't want to go through the heart ache of scans this time round. When you have been through what we all have scans are not very nice and its only after the scan has been confirmed ok that we relax and that is short lived. One of my friends who is in her 40s was in a similar situation to you and she did decide to use donar eggs and ivf but she had quite a few mc and all v.early - no hbs. The only advice I have is to try and be positive now while you are pg, I know the consultant has said that your age is against you but there are lots of women who do have healthy babies in their 40s so there is a very good chance that this bean will stick and be healthy. How are you feeling today? guessing taking it day by day. Thinking of you x

Sorry you're having a rough time julezboo the early days are very hard, hope you're getting some support. x

All same with me, had another scan this pm and all OK thank god, sitting and waiting for the scan is really hard and I'm constantly weighing up D&C/medical management in case it all goes wrong again! But thankfully we're good as of today and measuring 8.3 which is spot on.

Hugs to everyone

igggi Thu 12-May-11 15:56:14

Really pleased you've had a good scan smile. Bet not many others waiting for a scan who were thinking about d&c, it's our curse isn't it.
Nice to see Julezboo, always good to remember there CAN be a happy ending!

igggi Thu 12-May-11 15:56:16

Really pleased you've had a good scan smile. Bet not many others waiting for a scan who were thinking about d&c, it's our curse isn't it.
Nice to see Julezboo, always good to remember there CAN be a happy ending!

confu3ed Thu 12-May-11 22:25:09

Big congrats Hairy.

Well I am back TTC once more, been given 3 more months of clomid and fingers crossed will get a BFP with a sticky one soon!

My GP advised me that I can take low dose asprin but that there is ni real evidence about it. So can someone please tell me if this is just regular asprin that you take? When I asked about progesterone he said that this is something that used to be prescribed but has not been for 20 years due to birth genital defects but that IVF docs are now prescribing it in much lower doses, so really confused about that now. He advised me to TTC until December and if no BFP then a referral to yet another infertility specialist he did say that NHS funding for IVF is not an option due to my age so fingers crossed the clomid works. Just pray I don't have any more miscarriages as taking a year to conceive is a lifetime especially when it all ends in tears!

igggi Thu 12-May-11 22:42:36

Hi confu3ed. The aspirin I have is from Boots and it says "aspirin 75mg" on the front. Or tell pharmacist you want baby aspirin. I know some people are prescribed higher doses, but the majority are on the small dose. How are you feeling about ttc again? I hope you get your positive result soon smile

Havingkittens Thu 12-May-11 22:53:32

Good luck Confu3ed. The low dose is baby asprin, 75mg. Make sure you get the coated one to reduce aggravation to your stomach. Although even the coated ones are giving me gyp, but then I suffer from reflux anyway.

Also, I have been putting off calling a friend of mine for months because she's a bit self absorbed and I had a feeling that she would spend most of the call either banging on about how dull her life is looking after 2 young children or telling me how funny and cute and amazing they are, or telling me how her figure is shit since having them. She came up on Skype earlier and I thought I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. Let's just say, she didn't pleasantly surprise me by proving me wrong! She does know about all 6 of my lost pregnancies too. Just as well there was a problem with the video connection and she couldn't see me rolling my eyes. On the up side, just as I was wondering how I could wind up the conversation and get off the call the connection was lost and we got cut off! Phew!

Last week I finally got around to seeing one of my oldest friends' 10 week old baby, and yesterday I got a text saying that the other friend from our group of 3 of us just had a baby girl. Back in November we were all pregnant together. We've been friends for over 20 years, all learned to ride motorbikes together and passed our tests all within the same year when we were 18/19. It was a sort of coming of age thing that we all did together so all 3 of us having our babies together in the same year seemed to be quite poignant. They have theirs, and I'm still waiting, hoping, doubting.....

Probably not the best time to Skype the other friend really.

confu3ed Thu 12-May-11 22:56:58

Hi Iggi and thanks for the info, so do you take it now or when you get a bfp?

One word, terrified! But tests are all ok and tge Nhs won't do any more until I miscarry again so I guess it's time to try again. The clomid makes me pretty hormonal too hot flush city but if it works then I guess it's worth it!

confu3ed Thu 12-May-11 23:04:27

Thanks havingKittens

It really sucks when people are so insensitive and great u lost connection, maybe the pc got bored of hearing her too!

I am dreading the birth of my sisters baby and know I am going to find it really hard, seeing her pg is bad enough. It's really hard but if tgey are great friends, then explain how you are feeling, I did it with a good friend of time when I miscarried a couple of years ago and she is now so empathetic, its made our friendship stronger than ever.

Havingkittens Thu 12-May-11 23:22:15

Those two friends are both very sensitive and sympathetic to my situation, I'm pleased to say. The one who had her baby in February just told me that she would love to see me but that she understood if I wasn't ready and that I should only come when I felt comfortable about seeing them. She was also really empathetic as she had been trying for a good few years and had had IVF in the end. There had been lots of times whilst other friends of ours were having babies that we commiserated with one another and empathised about feeling jealous and left out.

igggi Thu 12-May-11 23:48:27

HK I'm seeing a friend with a baby tomorrow, will practise my stiff upper lip in the car on the way there.
DS tonight told me he wants a baby sad Of course he doesn't really, no way he would want to share! For me it is people having their second child (because of course, everyone has two) that affect me the most. First ones and third ones are ok!
Confu3ed my local RMC told me to take it at bfp. Mr S has told me to take it now, so have just started doing that. Didn't know about coating, that's interesting.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

igggi Sat 14-May-11 15:35:38

Lunatic that must be a good feeling!
I think I am close to being done, but in the other way - can't take this just going on and on..
Regarding the aspirin, I never took it at all till it was prescribed, I am assuming dr S thinks I should take it now based on my own test results (stopping implantation would be counterproductive for him!)
I wouldn't take it at all if not told to by a doc (unlike the array of vitamins I consume)

igggi Sat 14-May-11 15:35:38

Lunatic that must be a good feeling!
I think I am close to being done, but in the other way - can't take this just going on and on..
Regarding the aspirin, I never took it at all till it was prescribed, I am assuming dr S thinks I should take it now based on my own test results (stopping implantation would be counterproductive for him!)
I wouldn't take it at all if not told to by a doc (unlike the array of vitamins I consume)

milkyway07 Sat 14-May-11 18:36:34

Hi everyone - I think confused asked about the progesterone - apparantly there are two forms of progesterone - one is synthetic and one is natural. Pharmaceutical companies created the synthetic one so they could patent its formation angry. Anyway, it is the synthetic one that has been known to have bad side effects. Pregnant women are prescribed natural progesterone pessaries - and it is really important they are prescribed the natural form. I don't really know anymore than that, but my consultant wasn't too keen on prescribing me progesterone either. I think it is like Lesley Regan says in her book, if a pregnancy is going to fail anyway, it will fail when you stop taking the progesterone, so it is like stopping the miscarriage from occurring (morbid I know).

I was told to take aspirin from the first positive test, and I was prescribed it by the doctor but you can get the same thing from boots for about £2.

Nothing much going on with me - don't have any strong symptoms again. Have my scan booked for 7 weeks. Not too hopeful that I will make it to then. At least I know if things don't work out I will be going for medical management again. Also, the UK is in short supply of high dose vitamin D. My pharmacy has been trying to source it for about a week now to no avail, which is a bit crap.

Hope everyone is doing ok.

luckyfor2 Sun 15-May-11 20:23:35

milky don't worry about symptoms I didn't start feeling anything until I was 6 weeks when I started feeling tired and didn't start feeling sick until 7. Can't believe they can't get hold of VD. That is just rubbish!

I think progesterone is looked at differently by different consultants, like you say Lesley Regan thinks it doesn't help but other consultants do which is why they are running the PROMISE trial to try and establish whether it does help or not. I'm on on the trial because I'd realy like to help though I always have v.strong hormones in pregnancy so my consultant didn't seem to think it would help anyway. Guess, I'll try anything at this point!

milkyway07 Mon 16-May-11 10:17:12

Thanks for replying lucky and thanks for the reassurance. I have 3 more milestones to get past before I feel a little more confident. I've gotten to 6wks 1 day today - my first miscarriage was a day before 6 weeks.

I didn't know about the PROMISE trial - thanks for sharing that, will look it up later. My doctors have never checked my progesterone levels during pregnancy. Do you think it would be too late to ask for a test now?

luckyfor2 Mon 16-May-11 10:24:14

Hi milkey I know how you feel these early weeks are so hard to get through and you can't help but think the worst all the time. I had my progesterone levels checked on day 2 and 21 of my cycle (I think) but these are more to do with conceiving than progesterone in pregnancy, I've never had progesterone levels checked in pregnancy and not sure whether there is a test or not? Do you have an early scan booked and do you have consultants looking after you?

gracebf Mon 16-May-11 11:03:49

Hi, I am after some advice and figure you all have a wealth of experience between you! I found out after a scan this morning that I have had a 3rd Missed miscarriage.

I have DD who is 5 but have had 3 miscarriages since. All have been the same and have been that the 6 week scan show delayed development and eventually after lots of waiiting the ERPC has been agreed as no hb and no foetus that has developed to the proper size. All have been at around or below 6 week size at 10 weeks.

I am trying to decide whether or not to go down the consultant route and would like some advice based on your experiences. Whilst I would have been delighted to have another child, I do not have this huge desire to have another. I dont want to put us all through lots of stress having tests etc and then another similar outcome. But I also dont want to give up trying if this problem could be solved either.

Does anyone have a history of similar type of miscarriage and been given a reason for it? It must be a specific problem I have as all miscarriages have been the same.

Would just like all the information and opinions I could get please. Also if this is not an appropriate place to ask then please say.

gracebf Mon 16-May-11 11:04:26

I forgot to say I had my progesterone levels on day 21 checked and they were 70.

confu3ed Mon 16-May-11 12:26:29

Hi , gracybf so sorry for your losses. welcome to the thread there are loads of people here who understand how you are feeling and can offer support.

Both my recent miscarriages have been around 5-6 weeks, and have had all of the standard tests but they have revealed nothing. I would definitely have them though as if they do show something it may be fixed. If there is no specific problem then you can make a decision based on that. The initial tests are bloods and a scan so not too invasive.
Good luck with making your decision and with the erpc, I have needed one with all my miscarriages.

luckyfor2 Mon 16-May-11 17:00:38

Hi grace welcome to the thread. Sorry you have had such a bad time and looking for answers is a very natural response when you have gone through what you have. Confu3ed is right that the tests are quite straightforward and if you get put through to a recurrent miscarriage clinic (which you can after 3mc) then they will test for all the standard things. They don't always show something and often come back clear but they will take a note of your pregnancy history also and see if they can come up with anything that might help.

Obviously we are not doctors on here so can not advise properly but like you say it appears that there might be something specific as all your mc are happening at the same time. From my experience and from what I have read I do know that natural killer cells often terminate pregnancies very early but there are very few consultants that test for this. You also haven't mentioned your age as obviously this can make a difference as to the quality of eggs. I know you will be going through hell right now and its hard to think what you might do in the future but if you do want to be seen by a recurrent miscarriage clinic it often takes a long time to be referred so I would get that in motion straight away, the tests also take a long time to come back. It is extremely hard to keep putting you, your body and family through this but lots of women unfortunately go through three miscarriages to then go on to have another baby.

I don't know if this has been of any help to you and if you have any more questions I'm sure one of us will be able to help but I would definately recommend reading these two books "miscarriage: what every woman needs to know" by Lesley Regan and "is your body baby friendly" by Dr Alan Beer. These books pretty much cover everything you need to know.

Take care x

gracebf Mon 16-May-11 17:15:53

Thanks for that. I have heard about killer cells but was not sure if it did stunt the growth of the embryo without causing a miscarriage. My miscarriages would have gone unnoticed until 12 weeks if I had not insisted on the scans. I am 34 and am aware that these tests may take a while which is why I am not sure i want to go down this route. I am lucky as have dd, 5 but this all impacts on her as she is very sensitive to moods around her. The last 2 years have been taken up with his at one time or another. I will speak to my doctor and find out how long the referral will take, I guess.

I just need next week and the erpc to be over and done with now!

Thanks for your responses.

milkway07 Mon 16-May-11 17:30:37

lucky - yes I do have a scan booked for next week which is a bit scary. I'm with the EPU at my local hospital so will be getting a scan every 2 weeks from next week (all depending..). I did have my progesterone checked nearly 9 months ago after my 3rd mc - I think it was fine back then. Thanks for listening.

gracebf - All my mc's have been between 5 and 8 weeks, 3 babies stopped growing at 7 weeks. I haven't had a reason for the miscarriages, even though I have had many tests done on the NHS. Like lucky suggested I really recommend the book by Lesley Regan, it is very informative and helped me understand alot about my miscarriages. Hope you decide what is best for you.

luckyfor2 Mon 16-May-11 17:31:30

Grace I understand how horrible it is and having a child to look after at the same time is also hard. I've had to tell my two children twice that their sibling has died and it truly is unbearable. You feel dead inside yourself and try so hard to be the mum you always were and wanted to be. I hope everything goes okay in hospital we all know how scary it is and please come back on here to share your feelings and questions, we are all here to support and help.

With regard to NK cells there was a trial done over the past few years and I'm pretty sure the results are to be released in June.

igggi Mon 16-May-11 17:56:34

Hi Grace, sorry to hear what's been going on. Maybe you could give yourself 6 months to regroup, by then you could have your test results and so make an informed decision about whether to keep trying or not. I'm sure you've been told it's "bad luck" and of course it IS possible all 3 babies had chromosomal abnormalities.

I have heard from S that I have borderline NK cells, other tests not back yet. (Wonder what "borderline" really means??)

gracebf Mon 16-May-11 20:10:46

Thanks for all your messages. Luckily I didnt tell my dd on any of the occassions that I was pregnant. I keep thinking that maybe it wouldnt happen if I got pregnant for a 4th time but am probably kidding myself. Must be a particular problem with this history.

Thanks again.

digitalgirl Mon 16-May-11 20:50:16

grace so sorry for your losses. It is incredibly hard dealing with pregnancy after miscarriage then miscarrying repeatedly especially when you have a child who is very aware of the stress you're under. I have one ds (nearly 3) carried to term without any problems. However have since had 4 miscarriages. All recurrent miscarriage tests I had on the nhs came back clear (took about 3 months to test and get the results back), so I went to see Mr Shehata at the Miscarriage Clinic when I miscarried a fourth time. He tested my nk cell count and it came back high. Basically my body has been rejecting what could have been perfectly healthy babies - the nk cells can attack from conception affecting the growth so that the foetus doesn't develop as it should. I'm not sure whether there is any difference in potential causes between a spontaneous miscarriage and a missed miscarriage. Worth asking a consultant who specialises in recurrent miscarriage. I know what you mean about wondering whether to continue...for me it's almost that I have to prove that I can have another baby, my ds is wonderful (and a handful) and brings us so much joy that I do wonder why I'm so hellbent on having another when I could just be enjoying him. I'm 32 so still feel like I have a few years more to keep trying. Trying to remember to live life in between the pregnancies & miscarriages though.

iggi i think borderline is an nk cell count between 0.8 and 0.9. He may suggest a lower dose of steroid when you come to discuss your treatment plan. I know of another mn'er who was found to have borderline nk cells - she's now about 5 or 6 weeks pregnant and on a lower dose of steroid as well as progesterone supplements. All seems to be going well for her so far. Do you know when your other results will be ready?

Not much happening here. AF has gone so we're ttc again, but egg not due for a couple of weeks so it's all just 'practice' for now. Still on holiday so enjoying being with ds and dh.

gracebf Mon 16-May-11 21:12:58

digitalgirl Can you get nk cells checked on NHS. Also I am assuming the Miscarriage Clinic is private? Can I be nosy and ask roughly what kind of price I may be looking at?

Can anything be done with nk cells.. I have vaguely heard of it and know its not too well researched.

I really appreciate all your help as its good to hear from people who know whay your/ they're talking about!

Havingkittens Tue 17-May-11 00:23:46

Hi Gracebf sorry for your loss. I just wanted to say that if you have time on your side and a sympathetic GP it is possible to get NK Cell testing on the NHS. I was referred by my GP to Mr Shehata. The waiting time was 3 months from referral and then I got my blood results 3-4 weeks later, so all fairly efficient. Although I had been for all the regular RMC tests first with no findings so don't know if that would have any bearing on your GPs motivation to refer you. Mr S has an NHS clinic at Epsom & St Helier.

The treatment generally consists of taking pregnancy vits (the ones with Omega3 as well), 25 microgramme Vitamin D3, 75mg Asprin & Folic Acid daily for 6 weeks before conception and then the relevant dose of steroids from ovulation to your period or BFP to be continued until 12weeks & then weaned off or if period comes take a break 'til next ovulation. This surpresses your immune system so as not to reject the pregnancy. Also progesterone suppositories from BFP to 16 weeks, and in some cases if you have blood clotting disorder too then clexane (I think, that's not in my treatment plan).

igggi Tue 17-May-11 13:55:37

Am pulling my hair out today. Did an optimistic test this morning (10dayPO) and am convinced a see a faint line, def after ten minutes though. Repeated it at lunch and think the same, though my eyes are now seeing things from all the staring I have been doing! Am pretty sure it is not blank, but of course you aren't meant to read after 10.
The reason I'm panicking (in addition to the usual!) is that I'm not supposed to get pg this month, am supposed to start taking steroids at next ovulation.. Wonder if I should phone S's midwife tomorrow (if I get a clearer +) and see if I can do anything now? Blast.

freelancegirl Tue 17-May-11 14:25:51

Hi everyone,

I’ve been off this thread radar for a while – lurking but nothing to say.

Igg I can’t advise about faint lines on sticks but I have heard some people say ‘a line is a line’ and also that lines are not always to be trusted. I know that doesn’t help. I would email Dr S’s midwife and see what she says if you WERE to get pregnant. Would you need to start steroids straight away? Does your body start to attack anything straight away or is there something of a breathing space before hand?

Kittens how is the Dr S experience going for you?

Sorry for the newbies in terms of having gone through mc, there is wealth of information and support here to fall back on.

I have a question about Dr S that I am wondering if any of you can help me with.

I am in limbo at the moment, waiting for an appointment to be made. I have just spoken to his office and apparently there are a few of us waiting for NHS appointments but they haven’t been processed yet. When they are processed there is then usually an average of 8 weeks to get the appointment.

I was wondering if anyone had been privately first and then had the NHS kick in? A private appointment would only take a few weeks.

They told me to keep calling every week to see if an appontment has been made but I am not sure whether I should bite the bullet and just arrange a private one. I would do this if I knew the NHS payment would definitely kick in afterwards, but what if it doesn’t?

Havingkittens Tue 17-May-11 15:10:18

Iggi, don't panic yet. I got a feint line after 10 mins just before I got my test results back and panicked and then the next few were blank. If you're only 10dpo I'd say get a First Response test as they were the ones Mr S's midwife recommended I used at 10dpo if I wanted to come of the steroids a bit earlier. If it is +ve then give her a call and see what she says. I reckon, if you are pregnant then it's better to get a prescription as early as possible rather than just leaving it. I know you're supposed to be on them from the day of conception but if that's been an gone you probably need to do the next best thing.

Freelance I was going to try it the other way around. I had the NHS appointment but was considering going private to get the results back quickly before they decided it would be more efficient to do phone consultations, and then go back to NHS for the treatment. Mr S said that would be fine as I was already in the system. He told me to call his private midwife and have a chat with her. Maybe it would be worth you doing the same. Tell her you are waiting for your appointment to be processed but that you are concerned it will take a while to get an appointment and want to set the ball rolling. She can only say no, that won't work. If you don't ask you won't know though!

Well, I am just approaching my surge judging by the feint line on my OPK today so OH is under strict instructions to come home and "see to me" before I go out this evening. Might even try and get another one in when I get back if that's not too much to ask from a 46yr old man! Last cycle was the first time on the steroids and unfortunately they made me feel like crap so I told him we need to make a more concerted effort this month so I can get the steroids experience over with asap. This is also why the midwife suggested doing an early First Response test so I can stop them before the 14 day cycle is finished. I'm hoping my body gets used to them though and my side effects calm down. So many people seem to be fine on them and I've been fine on them in the past for another problem.

freelancegirl Tue 17-May-11 15:31:26

Oh yes, Kittens, I remember when you cancelled your NHS one.

I have been on to them quite a bit today - they are so helpful. Basically if I want for an NHS appointment I won't get to start ttc (my calculations) until almost Sept! Even private appointments are now coming it at 20th June, and then of course there's the wait for test results etc.

I spoke to DH and he agreed we should splash out and go private for the first appt and then that (Dr S office agree this would happen) NHS can kick in when treatment is required. It means it will be £250 for initial consultation and whatever tests are done. Luckily I have a few done on the NHS which will hopefully save money. I think NK cells is around £200. But I know I definitely have high thyroid antibodies.

ANYWAY - the thing is, I called up to say sod it let's book that first private appt on 20th June and it turns out they have had a cancellation and can fit me in THIS THURSDAY at Ashtead. Gulp. So it looks like I will soon be out of limbo!! Am a bit shocked!

Havingkittens Tue 17-May-11 16:02:17

Wow! Good for you!

If you can get the meds on NHS that would save a bit. Regarding the scans, I don't know how it works privately but on the NHS they said I can just have the 6,8,10,12, 14 weeks scans at my own EPU (or in my case Fetal Medicine Unit) and they will keep in touch which is great as it means I don't have to schlep all the way to Carshalton every couple of weeks. I'm guessing (may be wrong) that privately you have the scans at his clinic which I'd imagine would be expensive.

Best of luck for Thursday then.

freelancegirl Tue 17-May-11 16:41:29

Thanks! It's madness isn't it - I have gone from waiting until probably July for a first visit to seeing him in 2 days! Am 37 in July so I wanted to get it done as soon as pos. I feel I have made the right decision, sod the money.

They said a lot of people do that whilst waiting for the NHS - go along initially as private and then after that initial consultation and tests hopefully the NHS will kick in. Like you I might suggest phone consultations (can really only stretch to this initial outlay) and hopefully I too can have the scans at EPU (if or when I get to that stage!). One thing I did ask though, which might be worth you mentioning, is that once I had started to see him could I change WHERE I see him - they said yes. So maybe you don't have to go to Surrey every time? Or was that about scans rather than seeing him.

Roll on thurs smile am making a big list of past ailments just in case and going to see my GP tomorrow to get all the exact results of what I asked them to test for post-mc a few weeks ago. I have had quite a few done which is good. What sort of thing do they ask you?

Havingkittens Tue 17-May-11 17:46:15

I don't think I need to see him as well as having scans. I don't know yet. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it but I think on the NHS I probably can only see him where he practices on the NHS which is the one hospital whereas privately he is in a few different clinics.

He got most of the notes from my GP and hospital records so didn't really ask that much as he knew most of it. It was pretty much verifying what information he already had. He doesn't ask about any past illnesses but I think he asked if I suffered from IBS and a few other things. I have to admit I don't really remember!

igggi Tue 17-May-11 18:14:19

Freelancegirl try to get the results that look like lab records (the numbers, not just "normal" or whatever), he seemed pleased with the ones I had to give him. Saved me money too, only needed 3 tests done.
Well I've tried another first response and is def a line there. I might allow myself a few minutes of being pleased before I find a way to play this (eg pretending it's not happening!)

igggi Tue 17-May-11 18:14:20

Freelancegirl try to get the results that look like lab records (the numbers, not just "normal" or whatever), he seemed pleased with the ones I had to give him. Saved me money too, only needed 3 tests done.
Well I've tried another first response and is def a line there. I might allow myself a few minutes of being pleased before I find a way to play this (eg pretending it's not happening!)

luckyfor2 Tue 17-May-11 20:42:46

freelance great you've got in to see him so quickly.
iggi I'd like to say congratulations but I know you must be feeling abit stuck now. I'm sure Mr S will have a plan when this happens.

freelancegirl Wed 18-May-11 00:19:57

Oh gosh Igg, it sounds like a line is a line!! Have you spoken to the midwife? Do you have the steroids to take now??? I would say congratulations too but I know if I am ever in that position I wouldn't want congratulations. But we are 'travelling hopefully' with you (it's a long story, born of another thread, but I think it describes how some of us have been feeling). Fingers crossed for a sticky one.

Yes that is good advice about the tests, am hoping I will only need NK cells done. I have a good list of them and I will be going to the docs tomorrow to get the actual numbers (where available) too. I am sure too, as Lucky says, that Mr S will have a plan when this happens. Do let us know how it goes!

And yes LuckY I can't quite believe I have got in to see him so quickly too! I mean it's taken a bit, my referral was sent on the 5th April and went missing, but I was fully prepared for it to take another few months for the NHS and even privately to wait. So it's all happened very quickly.

Havingkittens Wed 18-May-11 10:30:31

Gosh Igggi, your heart must be in your mouth! Have you spoken to Mr S's midwife/secretary yet?

...whispers congratulations...

gracebf Wed 18-May-11 11:07:07

Just wanted to say thanks as went to GP this morning armed with information and names of specialists thanks to your replies.

My GP was very responsive and is going to do everything she can to get me to see either Dr S or Lesley Regan. She thinks the best way to do it is to get seen by consultant at local hospital first and then when tests come back negative to push for referral to get other tests like nk tests done. She will help me get list together of additional tests I would want nearer the time.

She also thinks i might have a clotting disorder due to the nature of the miscarriages. I forgot to ask her whether the tests done by consultant at local hospital include testing for this. Does anyone know? I read that its called antiphospholipid antibodies.

This is the one I really want testing asap and dont want to hang around for local referral if they dont even test for this. Would rather start off privately too to get this tested first. Any ideas?

Have ERPC but feeling better now i have a bit more info about where to go next. Of course it does not mean it will work out, but i feel more in control.

Thanks again.

gracebf Wed 18-May-11 11:07:38

Sorry meant to say, have ERPC next week.

freelancegirl Wed 18-May-11 11:16:23

HI Grace

I managed to get my GP to test for antiphospholipid antibodies on the NHS. You might have heard this already but you can also ask for thyroid antibodies, anti-nuclear antibodies and a few other bits and pieces. I had a list somewhere that I can't find but I am going to my GP later and can ask what tests I have had. Vitamin D is also very important.

gracebf Wed 18-May-11 11:26:23

Thanks 8freelancegirl*. I did not know that as only just starting all this research. She did not mention that she could order tests this morning. IS it worth me going back and asking for her to do that seperately to the referral?

I have had v low Vit D in past but think its up to 70 now. Was at 40 so should have been ok this time round. Any information would be great as helps to have starting point. A list of test that I should get would be great. I know then what to ask for as I think unless you have some knowledge of this and a a bit pushy ( in a nice way), nothiing gets done quickly.

Havingkittens Wed 18-May-11 11:39:44

Grace the local hospital should test for all the blood clotting things including antiphospholipid antibodies, MTHFR, Antithrombin, Lupus etc. I had about 13 vials taken! If you have a read of Leslie Regan's book it explains all these tests so it's a good one to read before you go for your initial appointment so you can be armed with the right info. Alan Beer's book is much more involved and can be a little overwhelming I found, although it does go into the NK Cell and other immunity theories and covers the blood clotting stuff too. Leslie Regan's book is much easier to take in at this stage I would say.

The one thing I would say is that you will need to wait a while after your ERPC for all your hormones to settle down. Probably about 6 weeks, but not entirely sure. I had already had my referral to the RMC before I became pregnant for the 4th time so when I had my 4th MC my appointment was only a couple of weeks away (the midwife told me to keep the appointment and hoped I would be able to cancel it once I'd seen a hearbeat on my 8wk scan but sadly it didn't work out that way). I ended up having to have some of the tests again because the remaining pregnancy hormones were interfering with the results.

digitalgirl Wed 18-May-11 16:30:58

igggi congratulations! Am sure if you call the clinic they will send you a prescription asap. Unless you have a history of chemical pregnancies you'll probably be fine if you start taking the steroids and progesterone now.

grace Lesley Regan doesn't test for nk cells, but she does do an extra sensitive test for a thrombophilia which I don't think any other hospitals do. So if you want to rule out both nk cells and all clotting disorders I'd suggest getting your gp to refer you to Mr S and getting the hospital consultant to refer you to St Mary's.

Another pregnancy announcement today sad. One of my best friends who's 14 weeks. Figured that she must have just found out she was pregnant when I was having my erpc. She's been trying to tell me for a few weeks but I've been too busy. She's so excited and I'm very happy for her but so so sad for myself. I hate that miscarriage has stopped me from enjoying getting excited with friends for their pregnancies. It's so unfair that everyone else can be so happy and excited when they're pregnant while for me it's just so much worry and anxiety. I even hate it when peole announce their pregnancies when I'm pregnant as the last four times they've all gone on to have their babies while I've miscarried.

igggi Wed 18-May-11 18:06:56

Digital it's awful isn't it. I hope one day in the future I'll be able to (genuinely) share in someone else's good news, but I doubt it. I am home with steroids and progesterone. It was very expensive! I am trying hard to suppress any shadow of hope. There was talk from midwife today of booking a scan, and an appt for "when you're nine weeks". I just feel this jinxes me.

LAF77 Wed 18-May-11 21:33:18

Digital I'm right there with you. I think a friend of mine if pregnant. She has avoided alcohol on the last 2 occasions I've seen her and wouldn't have a cup of tea. I'm immediately suspicious. I should be happy for her as she has had one miscarriage and hasn't conceived easily. There are so many feelings that I have. I'm ashamed that I can't be happy for her (even though she hasn't said anything!) I just had my 34th birthday and I'm happy to close the chapter of the worst year of my life. I wasn't expecting not to have a baby or be advanced in pregnancy by this time in my life. But that's the way it goes.

igggi Thu 19-May-11 21:58:27

Laf happy belated birthday and I do hope your next year brings you some joy.

I'm trying to think that within a year I will have either had some joy myself, or at least the peace of giving up after trying all I could.

(Not suggesting you should be giving up Laf, I have at least 6 years on you smile )

Havingkittens Fri 20-May-11 09:48:53

Igggi is your first scan at 9 weeks then? I'm surprised by that. I was told to have them at 6,8,10,12 and, I think, 14 weeks (but not sure). I might have to set up camp at the hospital! I may even end up going in for a CVS at 11 weeks too because of my past history but I'm not sure yet. It's hard to know what to do. I don't know whether to talk about that on this thread though as I don't know what people's general feelings are. There was a very inflammatory thread a few weeks back in Chat about terminating for chromosome abnormalities so I don't want to get flamed or upset anyone.

So, just starting 2ww now. Day 2 of Prednisolone. Hoping this cycle will be a bit calmer!

freelancegirl Fri 20-May-11 10:41:13

Hi all, Igggi was your test a definite positive then? Wow! Tentative congratulations. Have you spoken to the clinic yet to see what they recommend?

I had my first appt with Mr S yesterday. I can't believe it happened so quickly, having thought I wouldn't see him for ages. Went to Ashtead for it. It's really funny as it is the first time I have been private and in retrospect I was chattering away trying to get the appt over quickly so as not to take too much of his time up - too used to the NHS I guess. He was great though, we had a really good chat about thyroid antibodies and NK cells grin. Luckily I had had most of the tests he would have done except of course for NK cells and also one other clotting one that I am going to my GP to ask for today. But it's pretty likely that I will be put on a course of steroids for the high thyroid antibodies. How long did everyone's results take to get back? How is Prednisolone Kittens? Any side effects? Hope all is well xx

Havingkittens Fri 20-May-11 11:00:39

Hi Freelance, well, I've only just taken the second one so far this cycle so not sure. The last cycle wasn't too good for me but don't want to put you off as lots of people don't seem to suffer many side effects. The first 4-5 days were fine for me but then I started feeling a bit manic and found it really hard to concentrate. I was quite spaced out and shakey towards the end of the 2 weeks too. My waistline seems to have increased but I rather suspect that's got more to do with the last cycle being sandwiched between Easter and 4 days with my rather indulgent mum (Afternoon tea and cake and pudding every day!). Other symptoms were very similar to early pregnancy so at least it distracted me from trying to symptoms spot for pregnancy! V hungry & weeing a lot!

freelancegirl Fri 20-May-11 11:23:27

Shame you are having side effects, maybe your body will be a bit more used to it this time? I asked Mr S about these (the 'moon face' thing in particular worried me confused but he said the dosages are usually too low for that.

Also I have heard through Dr Google that sometimes when you get pg it can actually mask some of the symptoms too and make you actually feel better. Which isn't bad, but for anyone worried about lack of symptoms must be odd too.

Don't talk to me about waistlines. I have put on at least 10lbs since mc, all around the tummy! I think it is an excess of oestrogen. I am doing plenty of other ladies heads in by going on about this incessantly on another thread smile But I too am having far too many 'cheer myself up' afternoon teas, meals out and wine so it's probably my own fault too.

Keep me updated with how you are feeling! It's fascinating. Did you have High NK cells or just yer average normal killer ones? I visualise the little blighters like cartoon characters. There should be a NK cells emoticon. And a moon face one too just in case. Visualise them being wiped out by the steroids for some positive vibes!

Havingkittens Fri 20-May-11 11:59:48

My levels were 1.45, I think that's quite high but I've seen other people have much higher. I rarely get bugs, colds etc. Even when my OH has a cold or throat infection and breaths it into my face all night long I seem to manage to evade them. The main "bug" that I used to get every year without fail was some kind of ear thing which made me really dizzy and spaced out so I'm hoping that maybe the steroids suppressing my immune system meant I got that bug and it's out of the way now. I did feel very dizzy and my ears were really popping and sore so fingers crossed that may have been a reason for me feeling so rough.

I visualise NK Cells like something from the old arcade games like asteroids or space invaders!

No moon face as yet, I'm very pleased to report! Can't say much about spots or excess facial hair as I'm fairly well equipped with both of those lovely features already.

freelancegirl Fri 20-May-11 12:04:56

And steroids are like Pac Mac eating them up smile

So do you think there are benefits from having high NK cells then? I read somewhere that it might make you less prone to nasty diseases. I have always picked up nasty diseases quite well so I am not sure if that's the case with me. But then I won't know if I have them until the results come back. Good news on the lack of moon face though - maybe you should start measuring it every morning just in case grin . Realistically Mr S said the dose is too small for that. Spots and hair? Ah, there is so much to look forward to when Mr S suitably drugs me up.

luckyfor2 Fri 20-May-11 12:05:49

Freelance glad the appointment went well and kittens I hope the steroids aren't too bad this time around.

luckyfor2 Fri 20-May-11 12:08:08

Milky when is your scan?

Had my 9 week scan yesterday and everything was fine. It seems to be getting harder each week. Another week ticked off though. phew.

igggi Fri 20-May-11 16:34:56

Oh Lucky that is so good. Keep racking off those weeks!
Having kittens I'm seeing him in 2 weeks (arranged before pg) so I was told to get a scan up here and then see him again around 9. I could not afford all those scans, plus the joruney costs, when I can get them here for free. Actually I'm rebelling and not having early ones - I've had two bad experiences with a 7 week scan showing a live one, gone by 8 weeks. So I think (if this continues, not even at 4 wks yet!) I will wait till 8. Have been very active today, lifted quite a lot, and convinced I've buggered it up already sad
Freelance, I was phoned with my nk cell result one week after the test, you won't have to wait long.

igggi Fri 20-May-11 16:34:56

Oh Lucky that is so good. Keep racking off those weeks!
Having kittens I'm seeing him in 2 weeks (arranged before pg) so I was told to get a scan up here and then see him again around 9. I could not afford all those scans, plus the joruney costs, when I can get them here for free. Actually I'm rebelling and not having early ones - I've had two bad experiences with a 7 week scan showing a live one, gone by 8 weeks. So I think (if this continues, not even at 4 wks yet!) I will wait till 8. Have been very active today, lifted quite a lot, and convinced I've buggered it up already sad
Freelance, I was phoned with my nk cell result one week after the test, you won't have to wait long.

pureequeen Fri 20-May-11 17:02:44

Hi all - some good news for some - am trying to catch up is it iggi? fingers crossed.

Laf - hello my fellow 34 year old and happy belated birthday. Here is to a fantastic year and happy times. Absolutely no exaggeration, I was told of 6 pregnancies yesterday - all friends or colleagues whom I see a lot of. And today I sent a congratulations card to a friend who just had a baby yesterday. She had the same "due date" as me for one of my mmc (tomorrow)

having kittens I don't know if others feel the same so I am a bit tentative about this too but I would really like to explore CVS/amnio testing etc. One mmc had a very serious genetic defect. Although it was a one off (I don't carry the gene) it did make me think seriously about testing. Apologies if people don't want to have this on this thread - just say.

I have just put in a request to drop a day at work. Quite a big deal for my employer so I find out next week what they say. I did mention what had been going on the last few months - embarassing for the senior managers but I thought oh well, might as well be honest.

HAve a relaxing weekend everyone.

milkyway07 Fri 20-May-11 17:02:56

Lucky very pleased for you!
My scan is on Monday - I'll be going in prepared for the worst. I will be 7 weeks. I haven't even booked-in at my surgery yet, as in the past year I have had to cancel every first midwife appointment I have booked a week before it is due. Can't go through that pain again.

hairylights Fri 20-May-11 18:07:29

milky I'm not booking in until I've hd a 12 wk scan (if I get to 12 that is)!

igggi Fri 20-May-11 21:32:32

The last time I "booked in" I mc the next day - so no hurry to do that! I haven't told DH yet, which is strange. I just can't deal with his worries on top of my own. And the false hope. Off to stick some progesterone up my fanjo (well makes a change from a thermometer!)

igggi Fri 20-May-11 21:32:33

The last time I "booked in" I mc the next day - so no hurry to do that! I haven't told DH yet, which is strange. I just can't deal with his worries on top of my own. And the false hope. Off to stick some progesterone up my fanjo (well makes a change from a thermometer!)

hairylights Fri 20-May-11 21:35:27

iggi I really get that you haven't told hubby yet ... I have considered sneaking a private scan alone ... My dp is hugely supportive , but I'd almost rather be told bad news alone than us cry together at a scan again.

luckyfor2 Fri 20-May-11 21:36:05

milky my consultants are covering my care - I don't think I'll even see a midwife - and don't want to to be honest after all the bad experiences! Try to think positive (I know impossible) but if you've had all the tests there is no reason that anything should be wrong this time, will be thinking of you x

pureequeen its so hard hearing of people's good news and gives an overwhelming feeling of why not me everytime. Let's hope all of us will be lucky this year. Hope your bosses give you a day off, it's hard coping with all of this.

iggi lifting wont harm a thing as I know you already know but try and keep chilled - again not easy. Good idea about having the scans nearby, seems silly to travel and pay when you can have them on NHS.

Hairy hope everything is okay with you.

Had a phone call with an appointment for my nuchal scan today for 9 June feels too early to organise and already feeling its going to jinx everything!

Hope everyone has a stressfree weekend x

Havingkittens Fri 20-May-11 22:11:17

Pureequeen - I think they can usually see any markers for genetic problems in the Nuchal Scan (gosh, those two words almost make my blood run cold! I've only got to that stage twice but instead of it being a "great, we've got to the 12 week scan" moment it was a big hideous mess) but may offer you a CVS if you request it. I am generally offered an early one at 11 weeks before even having a nuchal scan because I've had two bad experiences in a row, even though it was apparently random bad luck rather than anything to do with our genetic make up. The scary thing is the risk of miscarriage which after I'd had the second one I didn't think I would think twice about because I didn't have any problems on the two occasions I had them. Now that I've had a further 3 miscarriages since then, on top of miscarrying my first pregnancy that risk is quite frightening. BUT, then so is the risk of having a baby who will at best grow into a handicapped and dependent adult that, by then, myself and partner are too old to properly care for the needs of. The best piece of advice I can give you is to make sure you book the next couple of days off if you have a CVS so that you can take it as easy as possible. Stay at home, watch DVDs/read etc, stay in bed and get your other half to cook or do any running around that needs doing. Hope that helps. If you have any questions do PM me if you want. Also, you can go on the Antenatal Tests and Choices part of MN if you want to ask about your specific karyotyping results.

The last time I booked in was probably my second pregnancy about 3 and half years ago and I've only just managed to take the childrens' centre where my midwife was based to take me off their text and mailing list informing me to various fun groups to bring my baby to! Mind you, I'm glad I did book in then as I met my lovely midwife who suggested I self refer to her straight away when I get pregnant. It's really helpful to have that continuity of care and she is always very good about answering my neurotic emails as well as organising early scans etc.

digitalgirl Sun 22-May-11 10:59:46

Hooray for good scan lucky

How are the 'roids treating you this time kittens?

I am confused. Have had no positive opk's this week, which is not unusual, but have had a massive temp hike this morning which I can't explain with anything other than maybe I ovulated yesterday. I didn't have any of my usual bloating/cramping yesterday that I normally get on ovulation day - although I have had a few on/off days of ewcm and cervix has been open. So I'm not totally convinced I've ovulated yet. I'd expect tomorrow's temp to be higher if I have. I hope I have. But I don't think I have. Won't take the prednisolone till I'm sure I have.

This cycle has been trickier than I thought it would be.

digitalgirl Sun 22-May-11 11:03:20

Forgot to mention that I'm only cd17 today. Normally don't ov till cd23-25. But I have been taking metformin so wondered if that might have had an effect. But I definitely had a positive opk last cycle, so didn't think I wouldn't get one this cycle. I've always got them before.

Oh well. Suppose I'll know one way or t'other in the next few days.

Havingkittens Sun 22-May-11 13:42:47

Hi Digitalgirl, gosh, how confusing for you. I don't really know anything about temping but was under the impression that temps fall after ovulation rather than rise. Could well be wrong though so I'm not the best person to offer opinion. I guess just keep peeing on them sticks! I was surprised a couple of days early this month as I've been ov'ing around day 16 after 2 days of double lines on the OPKs but this month I only had one surge day and Ov'd on day 14 so gawd knows! It's not really an exact science I guess. I don't get EWCM anymore (I'm guessing that's something to do with age sad) but did get really bad pains on my right hand side the day after my surge.

So far I think I'm ok on the 'roids. Did have a stroppy day on Friday but that may have just been inspired by my OH! Last month I was ok for the first 5 days and then it got a bit shakey so time will tell. I hope I don't get the shakes and concentration problems this time because I'm doing an HD Brows course next weekend which involves threading, waxing, plucking, trimming and dying brows - not really the best time to have the shakes or a concentration problem!

igggi Sun 22-May-11 20:57:16

Hello. Interesting to see how many people think the making dates/scans is a way to jinx things! I am seeing my GP tomorrow, and I really don't want her to even tell me the "due" date (avoiding fertiltyfriend for the same reason).
I need something engrossing to take my mind of the days ahead. Or the chance to hibernate perhaps.
HK, I've been on steroids for 4 days now so maybe my side effects will arrive tomorrow! Good luck with your threading smile

LAF77 Sun 22-May-11 21:53:42

Glad to see that there is some good news on the board with iggi moving through the ranks and kittens and lucky going strong too. Hoping you are doing well too hairy

I have my second appointment at St. Mary's this week. I'm not really sure what to think other than worrying a bit about being told that there's something wrong with my uterus and I'll need to have surgery and wait before trying again. It seems like a long time ago that I was pregnant. If I have the chance to ask anyone about the unfussy uterus study at Imperial College (what a dreadful name!) I will do so.

suffolksteph Sun 22-May-11 21:54:32

Evening ladies... Newby here..

after 4 MC I'm awaiting my results from RMC testing at St Marys on the 7th June.. the last 6months have dragged since my last loss and I'm hoping that after the 7th we will be back to TTC....

Any ideas on what to expext as all early indications show "all normal"

Havingkittens Sun 22-May-11 23:21:25

Thanks Igggi. I have mixed feelings about scans. I've been through the early scan, seeing heartbeat and then loosing the pregnancy anyway but then on the other hand all my MCs have been MMCs so I would rather know if things weren't working out than finding out at 12 weeks that things haven't been right for weeks. Anyway, as my OH says, first catch your rabbit....

I'm not pregnant yet LAF77. Not as far as I know anyway. Just on steroids from ovulation so far. Sorry to hear about the findings that your uterus is not as it should be. You're right, that is a strange name! I hope you get a date for the surgery really soon so that you can start TTC again. I can understand how frustrating it is having to wait longer still though. I think we both had our last MC around the same time. I don't mean to sound flippant, but you are lucky to have a little time on your side, at 34, at least. I suspect that's not much consolation at the moment though.

Welcome Suffolksteph. After I had my initial RMC testing which came back all normal I was recommended to take asprin during my next pregnancy but that was just at UCH. I don't have experience of the testing they do at St Mary's so couldn't say what they will suggest. Hopefully others may be able to shed more light. I just didn't want to post without saying hello and wishing you the best of luck.

LAF77 Mon 23-May-11 06:12:21

Hi kittens sorry for my mistake! I've been confused about you and you are confused about me! I haven't been told I have to have surgery yet, I'm just worried that I might be. I know that I have one fibroid and not sure about what Wednesday will bring. I hope that you get on the pg train soon!

Steph I'm a few weeks behind you as I'm also at St. Mary's. I don't have my final consultation until 21st June. Like you, none of the tests by my local GP showed anything that they could treat. I'm not sure if STM will find anything. The statistics are that 50% of women who are recurrent miscarriers will find a reason for it and the others will not. It doesn't mean that you will have an unsuccessful pg if they can't find anything. Good luck, we are here supporting you from the sidelines.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Mon 23-May-11 08:53:11

Hi all, not much time for a catch up just wanted to pop my head in and let you know I'm still about.

Please don't think it's insensitive of me, but just wanted you all to know, after being such a great support to me, that I have reached 21 weeks and am having a little boy.

Have to dash as my fridge repair man is on the way grin

Havingkittens Mon 23-May-11 09:24:33

Not to worry LAF77, sorry for my confusion too. Sometimes it's easy to loose track or get the wrong end of the stick with so many of us to keep up with!

Ahh, Coconuts I thought you'd been quiet recently. That's lovely news, congratulations! Don't feel it's insensitive. It's great to read of good news, it's inspiring and gives us all something to hope for. smile

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Mon 23-May-11 09:33:53

kittens - the book! I'd forgotten. Now I've remebered....

Havingkittens Mon 23-May-11 10:09:26

Ha ha, don't worry. Whenever you have time! I was thinking the other day that I hoped you hadn't sent it as you'd think I was very rude for having not mentioned it!

milkyway07 Mon 23-May-11 10:43:50

Hi all, we got back from EPAU an hour ago. For now, it is good news - baby is measuring right on target and there was a strong little heartbeat - don't know bpm, as they don't measure it at this stage. I was relieved but long off happy, as last time our little baby girl passed away a few days after the 7 week scan. I tried not to look at the screen for too long so as to not attach myself deeply, but the sonographer ended up giving us a picture, and she seemed happier than me about the scan. It's crap that I won't ever be able to be happy about things like this ever again, as I know my happiness is usually short-lived.

They took bloods for things like iron levels and uric acid and also saw that they will be measuring my progesterone level aswell.

I've got my next scan at 9 weeks. Still not having any major symptoms or nausea, so am prepared for whatever happens in the next few weeks.

luckyfor2 Mon 23-May-11 11:40:33

Conconuts fantastic news that everything is going well and you're having a little boy - one of each grin.

milky good news on your scan and totally understand how you're feeling. I have a scan picture from each week and its hard not to get attached. Great that they're monitoring your progesterone and checking for everything. Just try and be a little bit positive because at the moment you've got a baby growing inside you and there is nothing to be negative about. That is what I try and tell myself whenever I start to feel negative but understand it is just so hard and so unfair!

Welcome Steph sorry you've gone through a horrible time and find yourself on this thread but you will get lots of support here. I have no experience of St Marys but had everything come back clear from my rmc. Hope everything works out for you and St Marys help you get your baby. x

Laf It would be great to know what the consultants at St Marys think of the unfussy uterus. It's normal to be expecting all sorts of things been wrong but whatever happens you'll be in the best hands and most importantly you'll be able to move on and ttc. I know its been such a long wait for you and I bet you can't wait to get moving on. x

Hope you girls on the steroids are doing okay and they're not making you feel too ill.

Nothing new here. Had to fishout my maternity bras cause my boobs seem to have grown alot in the past couple of weeks, cant help feeling I'm jinxing. Its hard to feel comfy at the moment as everything is tight but I just daren't get out the mat clothes as I've had to pack them away twice in the past year!

milkyway07 Mon 23-May-11 17:44:08

Thanks lucky. I know I am being quite selfish and thinking about myself, afterall this baby deserves some positivity and happiness from me too, but like you say, it is so hard especially from all the knock backs I've had since October 2009.
I've been at home all day, and haven't had the heart to take the picture out of my bag to have another look.

I threw out all of my maternity clothes a couple of months ago, although I do have some maternity bras - but don't need them just yet (thankfully)!

hairylights Mon 23-May-11 18:11:50

Milkyway so far so good.

I was talking to my counsellor (1st session of mc counselling today) and saying exactly what you've said in your post, "it's crap that I won't ever be able to be happy about things like this ever again, as I know my happiness is usually short-lived." it is very hard to see how things can be different, when they've been a particular way over and over again.

It is so, so very crap. I told my counsellor that I simply don't want a scan, I don't want to wait in that god awful room where you are all there because there has been some kind of problem, I don't want the sympathetic looks, and the 'I'm sorry', I don't want my partner to squeeze my hand and cry, I don't want to be put in the room that you wait in (which has no pictures on the wall) while you wait for them to give you tablets, I don't want to have to break it to my family and colleagues and deal with their sympathy.

If it goes well, I really, really don't want to tell anyone until the day I have to hand in my MATB1 (which I think is at about 6 months). Seriously, if it goes well, I might just not say anything at work until I really have to! And if anyone comments, I might just say 'mind your own business'. Is that mad?

luckyfor2 Mon 23-May-11 19:47:27

Milky you are not being selfish please don't think that. The only reason why I'm trying v hard to be a little bit positive this time is because in my last pregnancy I tried to ignore it and did so until I was 15 weeks. I get very big very quickly and basically had to hide inside until I felt positive to tell people and when I did the worst happenned. The thing is I felt so bad for not thinking about that baby that it actually made me feel more guilty when we had to say goodbye to him, like I hadn't given him chance, but the pain wasn't less painful just because I had ignored my pregnancy. So I promised myself that I would try to at least acknowledge and be happy for this baby for as long as I can, and I pray that I might actually get to meet this one this time.

I think really that we just have to get through this the best that we can and I guess everybody has their way of dealing with it and I totally understand what Hairy has said about not going to the hospital and waiting in that room etc. I feel exactly the same and am hoping I can hide away from people for as long as possible. My 2DC are constantly asking me if we can have another baby and it breaks my heart that I've let them down. Just one day at a time for us hey and fingers crossed we might get to the other side this time.

milkyway07 Mon 23-May-11 21:08:20

Thank You lucky and hairy for the lovely replies. It is so reassuring to know that there are other women out there thinking and feeling the same things, even though it is under crappy circumstances.

hairy, I completely understand what you say about not wanting to tell anyone about your pregnancy for as long as possible. I don't want to tell anyone either. You're not mad at all - telling people makes everything so much more complicated. I also know what you mean about "that" room they take you to for "alone time"...Praying hard that you or anyone else here doesn't have to go through that again.

lucky, you are absolutely right - the pain can't be less painful just because you ignore the pregnancy. I am so sorry for what you have been through. The miscarriages have just scarred me in such a way that right now I feel like this is the only way to deal with this pregnancy. My DD went through a phase about 3 months ago calling everyone her "brother" or "sister" and this broke my heart, and I felt like I had let her down too. But I always try to make myself feel better, by thinking that when she grows up I'll tell her all the problems I had, and that I tried really hard - hopefully she will understand.

I don't say it very often, but this thread has been a life saver for me. I was the loneliest person in the world last January. Then I found this thread, and realised there are other women out there going through my hell - and there some who have got through to the other side with babies. There had been 3 babies born just before I joined in January. This gave me so much hope. I wouldn't have chased the doctors to test me further or my baby had it not been for this thread.

I am just hoping and praying that my chasing will pay off this time, and I am praying the same for everyone else aswell. I think it is time we experienced a bit of happiness.

LAF77 Mon 23-May-11 21:26:15

milky and hairy your words could have come from my mouth. I'm not TTC yet, but if all the stars align, then I will be able to again next month. It brings me to tears thinking about it. I don't know if I could cope with another loss. That's all pregnancy is to me, is loss. A small glimmer of hope that maybe we will be a family and then an enormous wave of pain. I'm nearly even keel now after 5 months after my third mc. I'll never have a baby without trying, but I'm so scared of putting myself and DH through the emotional black hole that miscarriage is.

digitalgirl Mon 23-May-11 21:48:42

coconuts so pleased to hear all is well!

milkyway great news on the scan. I completely understand your emotions, it really is the hardest thing to be pregnant after so many miscarriages. None of us will ever feel the same about pregnancy as we did the first time.

Welcome suffolksteph sorry for your losses. Have you had any tests done before your St Mary's referral? I'm supposed to be waiting for an appointment there but have gone ahead and seen an rmc specialist privately (Mr S) in the meantime who has diagnosed me with high nk cells.

Still no egg here and opk's are negative. Temp back down again so yesterday was clearly a fluke. Booooored. Also went back to work today and had a shitty day. Not conducive to baby-making.

Havingkittens Tue 24-May-11 10:11:31

Oh joy. I love days like this....

I'm on a shoot with two women. The presenter has just had a baby and has mentioned it in pretty much every sentence in the last hour. The other one is pregnant. Brilliant! I've already been asked if I have children too. Ho hum.

suffolksteph Tue 24-May-11 10:17:15

Morning Ladies... still brand new to this forum so please bear with me for any errors....

digitalgirl - i've had all the NHS "normal" tests done at my local RMC.. bit of a joke there... as was told one thing on the tests only to find out it was something else.... Choromosones on both me and DH all normal but the last two Fetal ones were "failed to grow". I have PCOS but only mildly.. well enough to mess up my cycles... I vary from 28 days to 45... not a very inviting place for baby! My first appointment as St Marys was back in March so I'm desprate for something to show up so we can start TTC again, I've been having Councelling weekly as after the last loss I went a little bit mental... I was off work for nearly three months after being sent home and having my BB taken off me... I'm back in work now but its all unsettling as people have been doing my job while not here and I'm not sure where I "fit" in any more... and to think of starting to TTC again is not doing anything for my stress levels... I'm kinda thinking that the tests will all be normal and we will be back to square one.. but at the moment I am trying not to think of it as I dont need anither reason to not sleep!

I know I'm really lucky to have been refered to St Marys as I am out of the London Area...

I will propably be stalking waching the board and post where I think I can contrubute.... also I'm sure I'll have a thousand questions after the 7th.....

Hope you all have great days no matter what stages you are all at...

luckyfor2 Tue 24-May-11 12:53:23

Oh no having kittens what a nightmare of a situation for you to be in, hope it will be over soon. x

steph it must be awful going back to work and feeling unable to settle but try not to put too much pressure on yourself - you've been through enough. Take each day as it comes and hopefully the consultants at St Marys will be able to help you whether something comes back or not. x

Digital sorry your temps have gone back down and I hope you get a positive OPK soon.

Havingkittens Tue 24-May-11 19:26:40

Ahh, it was ok once we got going on the job, she had to concentrate on her script. And I got to finish work at lunchtime smile.

LAF77 Tue 24-May-11 21:52:17

kittens what did you say to them when they asked you about children?

I ran into someone today that I hadn't seen for a year and they asked me what was going on and I bluntly told her I had 3 miscarriages in 2010. People tend to feel bad about asking, but I do want to put people in their place. It isn't any of their business to ask some times. I know that it may seem that they are caring for asking, but I'm not going to gloss over my pain for someone else to be at ease. Perhaps it isn't the right thing for me to do, but I try to do what feels right to me....

Havingkittens Tue 24-May-11 22:48:56

I just said "No, just a cat so far..."

It depends who asks as to what I say, or whether I say anything at all. A lot of my work involves me working with people I've not met before and won't again, quite intimately, and am partly there to put them at ease so it's not always the best idea to put them in an awkward position.

I generally don't tend to keep my mouth shut to save others' social discomfort though. It just depends on how I feel and the type of person I am with as to how I handle it. I don't see why it has to be a secret. Also, it's ok to know that celebrities have had M/Cs but everyone else has to keep theirs to themselves.

My OH is much more cagey than I am and there was one situation where I really wanted to say it how it was but it didn't feel right with him there. A guy that we vaguely know was talking to us at a party, moaning about being single in his early 40s and got onto how all his mates seemed to be doing "grown up things" like having kids etc. Then he asked, "So, did you not want kids then?" and when I told him that, yes, I did want kids, his answer was "Well, hadn't you better get on with it? From what I've heard there's a time limit on these things." I just wanted to tell him that by asking a 41 year old woman a question like that, at best he was going to make a woman who has made a conscious decision not to have kids have to begrudgingly justify her reasons and at worst be told some depressing grisly tale of lost pregnancies, heartbreak and repeated surgery. Instead I didn't say much and wandered off. Now he is probably just wondering why I never accepted his Facebook request!

I did once have to ask a bride's mum to change the subject when they were discussing her 12 week scan and the what ifs. I tried really hard to ignore it and carry on with my work but I got the shakes and couldn't concentrate on my work so had to say something. Not ideal when you have 3 people left to get made up for a wedding.

igggi Wed 25-May-11 08:31:36

What a rude guy HK. Having said that, I know I was never fully aware of the problems people have before I started having them myself - especially if they had one child, I just assumed they would be able to have another if they chose to blush
But partly that is because people don't talk about it, a couple of people at work told me they had mc when I had my first, but they would have never mentioned it otherwise.
In a low here. I really don't think I can get through the next days/weeks whatever it will be before I lose again. I keep analysing twinges and planning which method of mc I will go for this time. I think "if I can just get past 8 weeks" (when I normally lose) but of course they are loads of things that can go wrong right up to the end, and then people can still lose their babies after birth..
I wish having a stiff drink was compatible with pregnancy, I clearly need one!

Havingkittens Wed 25-May-11 09:30:22

It does come across rude doesn't it igggi but actually I think it was more down to ignorance, and it is in a lot of people's cases so I try to bear that in mind. ie. perpetually single male is really unlikely to know much about the struggles of unsuccessful pregnancy and probably it's all just like they told him it would be at school. Same goes for a lot of much younger people who's peers either haven't started having kids yet or if they have they've not had problems due to being young and virile (female equivalent) etc. So I try not to get incensed by some of the remarks as I know a lot of people aren't being insensitive at all, just innocently assuming these things are just black and white.

I'm sorry you're feeling low and negative igggi. It's so hard not to feel like that. I can't really offer much advice apart from taking it one day at a time. For the last 4 pregnancies, when my grandmother has referred to me as "expecting a baby" I kept telling her that I wasn't really "expecting" one anymore, just hoping for one. When I get pregnant I feel like I am in a "holding zone", waiting to see if I qualify to go further and a BFP to me, until I get to some sort of safety point (if there is such a thing) is still only enough for me to say "I might be pregnant" or "sort of pregnant" so I know exactly what you mean.

I am now obsessing about all sorts of things too. I have all sorts of little twinges through my cycle. I am having them now at 7dpo. I'm wondering if they mean anything. Most worryingly I still panic that maybe it's due to scarring from having so many invasions to my poor womb. Now I've also heard about this "Unfussy Uterus" thing, I'm worrying about that too! Even though I've tested for High NK Cells and so feel I'm taking some positive steps to give the next pregnancy a better chance of success, I can't help wondering about the former. I have, in the past, got pregnant within 3 cycles each time. That's fairly good going for my age but maybe it's because I'm not rejecting the bad embryos before they implant. The only 2 "successful" pregnancies I've had, I terminated due to chromosome abnormalities. It's really uncommon to have that happen twice in a row and now I'm wondering if it's because my body should've rejected them before they even became a pregnancy and isn't doing that part of the process effectively.

See, we're all driving ourselves nuts with our paranoia and self diagnosis and whatnot!

To think that I've never been that broody before I started TTC as well. When I started I said "If it happens, it happens. If not, that's fine too." It's such a strange paradox of feelings. I still can't imagine myself as a mother, and not just because I am having such bad luck with procreating. But then, when I look at people with their kids I feel jealous and want what they have. And then of course there is the compulsion of trying to find out why my pregnancies aren't working out and the fact that I'm now trying for the 7th time to get pregnant so that must say something. Most confusing! I suppose it's a case of Biology vs Peter Pan Syndrome. lol.

Lola78 Wed 25-May-11 10:11:51

Hi all, haven't been on for a while - been quietly worrying myself sick with this pregnancy. So far all seems ok, am 8 1/2 wks now and had my booking appt with midwife mon and she referred me for early scan. Just called hospital and the scan is on friday at 3.20pm. I have just burst into tears with fear. I am so scared.

digitalgirl Wed 25-May-11 12:50:11

Oh igggi and poor Lola it's perfectly understandable to be thinking the way you both do. I'm not even pregnant yet if I did get pregnant this cycle I have already calculated how far along i might be for my next shoot in case it falls over the dreadful 7-8 week mark. It's awful how you try and prepare yourself for the worst. You just have to remember that it's got to come good at some point - as it did for all our veteran grads - and this may just be the pregnancy that works.

kittens Those darned 2ww symptoms! Keeps you on your toes. Sorry to hear you had to deal with 2 blabbermouthed preggos yesterday. Am dreading meeting up with my friend who announced last week. She's so excited about it and I just don't want to know.

Haven't heard back about the karyotyping from my erpc 11 weeks ago. Wondering if I should bother chasing for the results or just wait a bit more. Not sure I want to know the results now I've been diagnosed with high nk cells.

Also I still appear to be infertile. No ewcm and cervix closed for business. I hate having long cycles.

igggi Wed 25-May-11 12:51:45

Oh Lola I know no point in saying don't be scared but try to stay a (wee) bit calm. You will cope with whatever happens, sadly we know this from experience. But why shouldn't it be your turn for some good luck?

HavingKittens thank you very much for your replies. I like the idea of the "holding zone". What I find hard is making sure life goes on during this time, it's like I don't want to think of or do anything else, and heaven forbid I let any hope of getting a baby creep in along the way.
In my opinion any twinges post ovulation are all implantation related! I could of course be wrong.. And any twinges after a bfp are automatically mcs.
Am telling myself this pg takes me one step closer to either having a baby, or being able to give up and move on. Either of which would bring more peace than we have at the moment.

igggi Wed 25-May-11 12:54:25

Digital, I had to chase and chase my karotyping results. Get GP to write to the hospital or something. (I had a report dated Feb, and I got the report in April).
I know what you mean about not wanting to know - I have been so convinced I have an immune issue, so finding out mc3 had chromosomal abnormalities was very hard. Although, there is some peace in knowing that NOTHING you did differently could have saved it.

Havingkittens Wed 25-May-11 13:10:13

Yes, Digital chase up. I can't remember exactly but I think my full Karyotyping results were supposed to take about 6-10 weeks, so at 11 weeks it wouldn't hurt to give them a nudge.

The thing to remember is that even though immune issues may be the overall cause for our miscarriages if we've tested positive for high NK Cells, chromosome problems are still one of the most common reasons for failed pregnancies. That's now mother nature works even when we don't have a 'history' or reason for our miscarriages. So even if the Karyotyping results come back saying there was a chromosome issue with that lost pregnancy, unless it shows up that there is a translocation in the chromosome pattern then it is just random misfortune, a blip, if you like, that happened when the two gametes met and is unlikely to happen twice in a row (unless you're unlucky like me, but it is uncommon). If karyotyping does show up a translocation then it is likely you would be referred for genetic counselling to discuss this further but otherwise it's just a matter of 'natural selection'. I hope that puts it into perspective a bit. This was my obsessive area of research before miscarriage testing became my latest project!

igggi Wed 25-May-11 13:46:10

Havingkittens what does a translocation mean exactly? My last baby was found to have trisomy 8, is that a translocation or a blip? But karotyping on DH and I came back normal. No genetic counselling suggested.
Sorry to hound you, but you seem (sadly for you) to have a lot of knowledge in this area.

Havingkittens Wed 25-May-11 14:45:56

I'm just having to have a little think about whether I've got my terminology right. I think it's translocation which means it's genetic and a disjunction which is just an extra chromosome randomly introduced. There are two different causes for any of the various Trisomies, and they show up differently on the slides so they can tell which is which. The most common cause is just a random blip, something odd that happens when the sperm and egg meet and an extra chromosome is formed in error. This can be the cause for any of the Trisomies. Basically a Trisomy is a term for something that has 3 chromosomes instead of the usual two. I can't really explain properly how it looks differently and it probably wouldn't make any difference to you anyway having not been shown your karyotyping slide results but trust me, if it looked like there was a genetic problem they would have let you know about it. So, yes, it's sadly just one of those things. As my genetic counsellor explained to me, reproduction, like everything else that happens in your body is so complex, and is sometimes prone to error. A positive result for chromosome problems may shed some light on why that one particular pregnancy didn't make it but it's unlikely to be a pattern if you see what I mean.

LAF77 Wed 25-May-11 14:53:29

lola big virtual hug. I have felt the same way in the past before scans, sleepless nights wondering what the next day will bring. We are all here rooting for you, hoping that this time it is different.

kittens i understand what your point about the situation and making others feel uncomfortable. I'm prepared to tell people who are not close to me about the miscarriages, but I might not be so open with some members of my family. Go figure.

Glad to see that you are OK coconuts

Iggi it is a shame about the alcohol ban during pg because I think a good stiff drink would help all of us with our nerves.

I had my second appointment at St. Mary's this morning. My scan confirmed that I have some fibroids, but they are not in my womb, so we will see what they say at the next appointment. I didn't get to ask anything about the non-fussy uterus as it wasn't appropriate to speak to a sonographer about it. I think I may be seen by Lesley Regan in June as her name was on my bloods paperwork, so I'll ask then.

For anyone planning to visit St. Mary's on the ultrasound and bloods, make sure to check in to the ultrasound department first. I was waiting there from 08:30 just to be prepared and all sorts of people jumped in front of me because I didn't know that there was a separate reception for ultrasound. There is a lot going on there as they have an emergency gynae clinic, plus ultrasound, plus consultants all in one small area.

Havingkittens Wed 25-May-11 15:04:39

LAF pretty much most of my friends and family, and plenty of random strangers know about what I've been through. I am definitely a cards on the table type of person. I do just have to be careful in professional circumstances. Sometimes it's best just to be evasive in these circumstances. If I'm with a presenter for example and I have an hour with her to get her ready to go in front of camera, going into my unfortunate history with her is not going to put her in the best frame of mind for being bubbly on camera for example!

I don't know much about fibroids LAF, if they are not in your womb is it likely they are causing problems or not? I guess that's what you are waiting to hear right?

LAF77 Wed 25-May-11 18:54:05

hi kittens I get you on the professional front. Very few people that I deal with in a professional capacity know anything about what I have been through, especially external suppliers I work with.

I had a long 2.5 hour taxi ride with a colleague who I have been friendly with a couple weeks ago. We talked about someone who was sacked who let her personal life (a messy divorce and custody battle) get in the way of her ability to work. He shared a personal story about his family and I shared with him what I had been through. He looked quite stunned at me and said, no one ever would have known, as you've been nothing but professional and haven't let any know that you have been upset.

Then he came out with a comment that "maybe it was nature's way of dealing with something that wasn't right" and I remembered all of the reasons why I rarely share with people what I go through unless I get asked a direct question. I explained that it could be true in some cases, but there also could be a problem with me that is preventing a successful pregnancy and it has nothing to do with the baby being "wrong". Fortunately, I was in a strong place and wouldn't have broken down in tears, but there are times when I would have if I was in the wrong frame of mind.

I am a bit worried about the fibroids. My impression is that they wouldn't tend to deal with it unless they were inside the uterus and mine aren't. I'm perfecting the ability to "wait and see".

Havingkittens Wed 25-May-11 19:41:48

Hmmm, yes "We'll see" seems to be my mantra of late too LAF

The problem is people try to do the right thing with their platitudes but I've had a gut full of platitudes. I do try not to get too wound up though as generally they don't realise that there is a whole can of worms to be opened up when it comes to these conversations.

I can appreciate his sentiment though, as someone who has had to make the heartbreaking/guilt inducing choice myself to end two pregnancies that 'weren't right' I am strangely grateful for mother nature to take that choice out of my hands, if that is the reason for a particular miscarriage. It's when other reasons come into play that cause it to happen repeatedly that it gets very f***ing tedious indeed!

LAF77 Wed 25-May-11 20:24:53

kittens perhaps you and I can join the RSPB as we are good at waiting and watching....

I don't think my babies were abnormal. I think the problem is with me. I've never been able to have them tested because I miscarried naturally.

suffolksteph Fri 27-May-11 13:54:53

Good afternoon Ladies.....
Joining the tell or not to tell debate.... its a tough one.. I'm of the open and honest school too and after being at work yest day and being asked When am I having a baby (There seems to be a boom in my offices) I simply say that I've been working on it but Sadly it keeps not working out..... After you get the simpathtetic head tilt and the I'm so sorry... people chat about it and as I am comfortable talking about it they are too.... I tend to want to talk about it as I felt so alone with most of mine that when i did talk the mount of people that have been in the same boat or realted to some is very reasuring.... Sad but good to Know I'm not the only one!

I'm also here to make a confession..... I dtd last nigh as I got a smily face OPK..... I know I know..... I shouldnt have as I still have to get the test results... but In my head I've had all the tests done now and its just the answers I'm waiting for.....

We wont be doing it again this cycle and I'm kinda thinking ..... well if it happens it happens..... But I feel really naughy today... I also was thinking that it would be a waste of an eggy if I let it pass.....

So... thanks.. that feels better... I still feel v naughty though!

igggi Fri 27-May-11 15:27:35

Having pains today (high up under my ribcage) and convinced this is me out already. Have just had enough.

igggi Fri 27-May-11 15:27:36

Having pains today (high up under my ribcage) and convinced this is me out already. Have just had enough.

digitalgirl Fri 27-May-11 17:05:42

igggi have you had similar pains in previous mc's? I really really hope it's not what you think. Keeping my fingers crossed for you very tightly.

Lola78 Fri 27-May-11 17:56:16

Hi ladies. Well am back from early scan - all looks good, baby measuring 8+4wks and has a heartbeat. Cannot tell you the relief I felt while I was there. The lady did mention there was a very small haematoma (area of bleeding) to the left of the sac but said it shouldn't be a problem. I spoke with the epu consultant after who also said it wasnt a concern at the moment. It did worry me a bit but anyway so far so good. Have to keep up with the aspirin and 5mg folic acid daily.

Thanks so much for your support ladies. Means so much xx

luckyfor2 Fri 27-May-11 19:45:08

igggi would pain so high up be related to pg? I know you're going to be thinking the worst as its just natural and I do it myself but it could be related to anything. When is your first scan?

Lola fantastic news about your scan. I've had an area of bleeding before and it didn't cause any problems but I did have spotting for several weeks - did they say this might happen.

Steph can understand why you dtd - it's almost impossible to ignore a smiley face.

Had my scan yesterday and everything was fine, baby bouncing around everywhere and all limbs etc present. They put me at 11 weeks today which is a few days further than my date. Its getting harder the further I get as my last baby died at around 15 weeks and I'm dreading getting to that stage especially as they found nothing wrong with our baby or me so keep thinking the same is going to happen. This is a hard ride to be on!

Hope all the steroid and early pg girls are feeling okay.

Hi to everyone else
x

igggi Sat 28-May-11 12:17:46

Thank you for replies. Well the pain has continued throughout the night, although I obviously hope I am wrong I think this is a sign. In which case I just want it to be quick.
Can't believe I'd just told DH last night and then this happens. So much for the steroids etc.

igggi Sat 28-May-11 12:17:47

Thank you for replies. Well the pain has continued throughout the night, although I obviously hope I am wrong I think this is a sign. In which case I just want it to be quick.
Can't believe I'd just told DH last night and then this happens. So much for the steroids etc.

luckyfor2 Sat 28-May-11 21:19:35

igggi I'm so sorry the pain has continued and I really really do hope that you're wrong and that it is something other than what you're thinking. Take care of yourself x

igggi Sat 28-May-11 21:25:15

Thanks Lucky. I really must learn to just wait and see, nowt else for it!
Only hope I have is that abdominal pain might be a steroid side effect - it hurts more whenever I eat too.

luckyfor2 Sat 28-May-11 21:47:18

Have you had this pain before in other mcs? It sounds strange that it is coming higher up and makes sense that it could be the steroids. Is there a list of side effects with the medication?

igggi Sat 28-May-11 23:00:58

Abdominal pain (poss leading to pancreatitis!) can be a side effect. Realistically however I need to remember something going wrong with pg is most likely. I see dr s next week so can speak to him then if nothing further - or call the midwife. But waitandsee really is all anyone will suggest, at only 4 and a half weeks. I am surprisingly calm about it now. Lucky you should celebrate your lovely scan and give my depressing moans a wide berth!

igggi Sat 28-May-11 23:00:59

Abdominal pain (poss leading to pancreatitis!) can be a side effect. Realistically however I need to remember something going wrong with pg is most likely. I see dr s next week so can speak to him then if nothing further - or call the midwife. But waitandsee really is all anyone will suggest, at only 4 and a half weeks. I am surprisingly calm about it now. Lucky you should celebrate your lovely scan and give my depressing moans a wide berth!

Havingkittens Sat 28-May-11 23:37:25

Hang in there Igggi. Steroids gave me really bad heartburn and stomach pain in the first week or two. Everything crossed for you. x

luckyfor2 Sun 29-May-11 08:00:04

Oh igggi don't say that I and everyone here knows what you are going through and you need as much support as possible. It is surprising how calm you are. Though I think you should defo ring the midwife as soon as they're open to see what she have to say. I think you're right and they will say wait and see but like kittens has said she had pain in the first week too so it could definately be the steroids. Hang in there and post as much as you need to. x

Havingkittens Sun 29-May-11 21:50:09

igggi I hope the pain has subsided. Try taking Gaviscon every few hours and drinking either boiling water or ginger tea. If it's anything like the stomach pains I had it's likely to be really nasty indigestion which caused enormous pain under my ribcage. Check it's ok to take but Bicarbonate of Soda can also help a great deal if this is the cause too.

I had an early surprise from AF today, on day 10 of the steroids, which is a rather short cycle. Typically I had done a FR test this morning too. Wish I'd have saved my money angry. So, out of the game again this month. Maybe my days of conceiving easily are behind me.

igggi Sun 29-May-11 23:15:31

Sorry this month hasn't worked out Havingkittens. No reason to think your cycle has changed for good though - I have had cycles of 26 to 30 days since erpc, when before that they were 28 every month.
Thanks for the advice - have been swigging the gaviscon! Though ate v little today and the pain has been much much less. I keep reading the diaries I kept from all the other times to see when the first "signs" were that it was all going wrong..

igggi Mon 30-May-11 06:43:41

Argh, wish I hadn't used a clearblue this morning - still saying "1-2 weeks", the same as it did last Monday! Oh well.

igggi Mon 30-May-11 06:43:42

Argh, wish I hadn't used a clearblue this morning - still saying "1-2 weeks", the same as it did last Monday! Oh well.

LAF77 Mon 30-May-11 10:32:15

Oh iggi my heart goes out to you with your waiting. When do you have a scan booked? I am hoping that the pain you are feeling is just a side effect of the steroids.

Steph I know your position and I would be trying not to waste an egg whilst waiting for results, but DH is out of town, so I'm forced to wait! I don't know why St. Mary's says to wait until the consultant appt. I suppose because if you needed to take aspirin/heparin for the moment of BFP, you'd be prepared, but there is always the chance that they won't find anything wrong!

I'm heartened by your positive scans lola and lucky

Sorry that AF has come kittens

Thinking about the pg ladies who have been on the thread before and hoping that all is well.

digitalgirl Mon 30-May-11 11:36:26

Thinking of you igggi - cbd's are notoriously inaccurate. Hoping the pains are medication related.

Sorry to hear AF came kittens. Bit odd that it came early, shite that it came after a bfn - hate it when that happens it's like kicking you when you're already down.
In the time you've had a whole cycle I'm still waiting to ovulate at cd25. Got a positive opk on Thursday and my temp still hasn't properly gone up. In fact today it dropped massively. Thought maybe today might be the day but cervix still closed. The longer this goes on the less hopeful I get that it'll be a successful pg if I did manage to get a bfp. My only successful pg was when I ovulated at cd19. I know it's prob more to do with the nk cells but I've been popping 3 metformin tablets a day precisely to balance my hornones and shorten my cycles.

Oh well there's absolutely nothing I can do about bringing on ovulation. Dh is still obliging me so at least we didn't stop swi prematurely.

luckyfor2 Mon 30-May-11 15:32:12

igggi I've never used the cb digitals but heard so many people so how inaccurate they are! I can imagine you're finding it difficult to stay positive and its agony waiting. I hope you have a scan booked soon so you don't have to wait too long.

kittens so sorry af came early how frustrating - did you do better on the steroids this time?

digi glad that your husband is obliging I cannot imagine how frustrating it is for you to keep getting positive opks and no temp rise or the other way round I really do hope that the metformin stats to work soon.

LAF I don't know why they make you wait for results because surely by the time someone might be pregnant they would have most of the results back already and would be able to advise re. aspirin etc we ttc before the results but I didn't ovulate until the results came back which was quite a relief because even though they found nothing I felt like I had the all clear. But it is a tricky one isn't it when you're desperate to try and move on.

Nothing to report here sickness and tiredness is reducing so obviously freaking me out but thats just normal freaking out!

Hope everyone is having a nice b holiday its miserable and raining up here, DH is working so been swimming and now watching wizard of oz all cozy on the sofa.

waves to everyone x

suffolksteph Mon 30-May-11 18:07:03

Evening lovely ladies...

Hope your all having a decent / fair B holiday....
Kittens sorry for AF arrival.. Grr to her!

igggi I really hope the pain is getting eaiser.. and hope your appointment with Dr S goes well...

I'm still slightly hanging my head in shame... I know nothing will come of it but I live in hope....

digi Long cycles suck... This month I OV on Day 21/22... but normally I'm day 25... last month was day 18 which was a nice surprice but I never know where I am... So I am a POAS addict! Hope you dont mind me asking but how long have you been on the Metformin for? I used to take it when I was first Diagnoised with PCOS as that was the only thing the GP's had to offer back then.... but I'm wondering if I should push for it again to help with my cycles and I've read how it can help with MC too.....

I'm off for a bath in a bit as I was up at 6am this morning to take my DS (Aged 14) to school for his PGL trip... His school in down in Kent so a 2 hour drive from us (He boards at a specialist Dyslexia school as he is SEN) so hes off for half term..... then bed... as I'm nearly falling asleep writing this...

Hugs to all and positive vides to the baby makers....

digitalgirl Mon 30-May-11 20:38:28

steph been on metformin for about 9 weeks now, started two weeks after the erpc for my last mc. I was hoping it would shave a few days off my cycle, but I have also been told it can take up to 6 months before you see any effects. Definitely ask your gp for it as I'm of the philosophy that if it can't do any harm and there's evidence to say it can help prevent a miscarriage in those with pcos then I'll take it. My cycles are usually around 40 days. It's very frustrating, but I've learnt to recognise my fertile signs now so even when I get a positive opk or a rogue high temp I know not to get too excited. When we first started ttc I was convinced the cramping I used to get around day 24 was implantation. Took me three (looooong) cycles to work out that it was ovulation.
I wouldn't beat yourself up too much about trying to catch the egg this month. I did the same when waiting for tests after my third mc - found out I was pg the same day I got the all clear! Unfortunately that didn't work out either, but I have a diagnosis now so just looking forward to seeing if steroids will help the next pg.

Havingkittens Tue 31-May-11 11:55:59

Lucky the steroids were a lot more bearable this time. Hardly any side effects at all, I'm pleased to say.

I seem to have spent my whole weekend listening to people talking about pregnancy and having babies! One of the people I made up on Saturday was pregnant with twins and then one of my colleagues on the training yesterday was pregnant and one of the other girls had a 13 week old so there was lots of baby talk going on. I suppose that's one of the perils of working so closely with women all the time. Although I do seem to have had a rather intense month of it what with the client the other day and one of my friends giving birth, and the other one moaning on. It seems impossible to escape from it sometimes!

igggi Tue 31-May-11 12:37:22

Back from one of those awful loo trips when, yes, this time there was blood. I cannot lose four babies this is just too much.
Havingkittens I saw a scan photo on my computer the other day and got angry and annoyed as usual - and this was a photo of my own DS sad. The mcs have taken away any pleasure at anyone's pregnancy.

Havingkittens Tue 31-May-11 13:07:47

Oh Igggi I'm so sorry. Can you get yourself to an EPU for a scan just so you know where you stand?

I so know what you mean about scan pictures. Sorry it was your own one that made you feel that way though. I HATE seeing scan pictures. I can't watch scenes on TV that involve scans and I want to kill anyone who puts scan pictures up on Facebook!

Are you at work? Is there anyone you can talk to for support there? Or maybe go home? I really feel for you, I'm so sorry. x

igggi Tue 31-May-11 13:32:54

I just have two classes to go so going to try to stick it out. Thank you for replying, it does help. Still not conclusive of course, but a very bad sign.
I don't want to go to epu, my experience is that it's always inconclusive anyway and I just have to go back again.
Can't remember what it is I'm supposed to do now..? Try again?

igggi Tue 31-May-11 13:32:55

I just have two classes to go so going to try to stick it out. Thank you for replying, it does help. Still not conclusive of course, but a very bad sign.
I don't want to go to epu, my experience is that it's always inconclusive anyway and I just have to go back again.
Can't remember what it is I'm supposed to do now..? Try again?

LAF77 Tue 31-May-11 13:41:41

Oh Iggi how awful! Can you ring Dr. S's office for advice?

igggi Tue 31-May-11 13:48:11

Thing is I can play out all the conversations in my head as I've heard it so often. I'm only 5 weeks, they would just tell me to wait.
I remember bleeding with my one successful pg too - funny how all my luck went out the window after that one!
It's so predictable. Helps to hear from you guys though.

igggi Tue 31-May-11 13:48:11

Thing is I can play out all the conversations in my head as I've heard it so often. I'm only 5 weeks, they would just tell me to wait.
I remember bleeding with my one successful pg too - funny how all my luck went out the window after that one!
It's so predictable. Helps to hear from you guys though.

Havingkittens Tue 31-May-11 14:03:27

Would be good to have a chat with Mr S or his midwife. I don't want to talk as if it's the end as you just don't know that for sure yet. But, if it come to the situation of trying again it will be helpful to know how much more chance he thinks you would have if trying on the steroids from ovulation rather than BFP with regards to whether you would want to try again or not.

digitalgirl Tue 31-May-11 15:17:12

igggi I'm so so sorry to hear this is happening. I too had bleeding in my first pregnancy with ds and that worked out fine. Is it heavy bleeding or just spotting? Is it worth getting a scan to at least rule out an ectopic? Although completely understand you not wanting to scan at this stage though as you know your own body better than anyone. Have everything crossed for you.

igggi Tue 31-May-11 15:40:53

Just spotting Digi. My appt with Mr S is on Saturday, so not long to wait (ha ha - hours feel like weeks!) I hate having to break the news to DH again too.
(Still thinking, if I accept it's all gone maybe there will be a miracle?)

luckyfor2 Tue 31-May-11 16:52:33

Oh igggi so sorry you are going through this I truly hope that it is nothing bad but know exactly how you feel at the moment. The hours do feel like days and weeks, time is so painful when this happens. I can understand you not wanting a scan at this point, scans are very hard when you've been through what we have, and we all understand. It's good that you're seeing Mr S on Saturday and I know what you mean about conversations going through your head. Midwife basically saying if it gets heavier or if you're in any pain blah blah blah. Lets all keep our fingers crossed that by Saturday the bleeding has stopped and Mr S can put your mind at rest. Thinking of you x

Glitterybits Tue 31-May-11 21:33:17

Shuffling in red-faced and apologetic for my continued absence.

I haven't had chance to catch up, but I think of you all often and wanted to send good luck vibes to everyone at their various stages on this rollercoaster journey.

igggi I know it isn't helpful at all and no reassuring words really help at times like this in the absence of a scan, but I bled on and off up to week 23/ 24 of this pregnancy for no apparent reason. As has been said time and again on this thread, bleeding isn't always a bad thing, but you know all that anyway. I have everything crossed for you that it is just an annoying blip and nothing more.

Has anyone heard from MummyA lately? If you're lurking, I hope all is well and the pregnancy is going well for you.

All well at this end, although sometimes I still have to remind myself, out loud, that I'm pregnant and it hasn't all gone horribly wrong...yet. Still in huge amounts of denial at 32 weeks. I'm not used to being optimistic about any of this, so I can't relax without MY baby in my arms. I STILL can't be happy for RL pregnant friends, RL friends who have just given birth and STILL find it genuinely difficult to be around pregnant ladies. I look at them and think, they'll be fine, but totally doubt my own ability to get to term. It's as though I'm almost expecting things to go wrong because I don't deserve them. Positively mental. grin

But, every day I wake up and I'm that bit closer - and I'm beginning to tell myself that this can happen now. Hopefully, in a week or two, I might actually start to listen. DH and I had a conversation last night about the fact that we probably need to start entertaining the idea that a baby might come out soon. Neither of us have made that leap of faith yet, but time is ticking by.

Anyway, enough rambling. Just wanted to send a message of almost positivity! A year ago, I had no chance of even getting, let alone staying pregnant and I remmeber how hopeless I felt. I know it's easy for me to look back from a position of relative hopefulness and make positive comments, but it did occasionally help me to hear almost good news stories from other people - particularly when things seemed very bleak.

Lots of love and continued good luck vibes to you all. xxx

milkyway07 Tue 31-May-11 22:10:52

I'm so sorry this is happening again igggi sad Like others have said bleeding doesn't always mean its the end. Just hope you're okay. Fingers crossed that everything works out fine.

pureequeen Wed 01-Jun-11 09:44:43

Just wanted to pop on and say hi. iggi so sad for you. I am hoping everything is OK but my heart goes out to you, I know how you feel, i really do.

I'm seeing Mr S next week. If only he knew that he had a fan club (well he probably does actually).

Best wishes to everyone else, sorry I have been so quiet.

BrownB Wed 01-Jun-11 10:19:53

Hello ladies. I was hoping I could join in - I recognise some names here - MummyA and DigiGirl... I've been knocking around on MN since September 2010, and have mostly ended up on the conception pages. Am pregnant for the third time (2 natural mc's), and am now FREAKING OUT and was hoping you ladies may have some thoughts which may help to calm me down somewhat.

My first pregnancy (Sep 2009) ended at about 7-9 weeks - the gestational sac had a yolk and embryo inside, sized at about 5-6 weeks.

My second pregnancy (Oct 2010) ended at about 8-10 weeks - the gestational sac had a yolk and embryo inside, sized at about 6 weeks.

I am now at 6+0 weeks, and managed to get a scan at St Mary's yesterday using a "don't accept no" attitude. I was hoping for reassurance... but no. The gestational sac was 10mm (a bit small), the yolk was there, but they couldn't measure it as there was a blood clot in the way. There was an active bleed too. Have another scan next week to see where it's at. So, I know am not really going to know what's happening until then.

Luckily, I was able to take a couple of weeks off work for the 5-6 week "danger zone" and was hoping that chilling out would help this one stick. I have also been taking aspirin 75mg for the past couple of weeks. I priced out going to see Mr Shehata after the last mc, but decided that I would "wait and see". If this one fails, I'll be referred to St Mary's recurrent miscarriage clinic anyway. But I really don't want this one to fail. Am beside myself with upset and anxiousness and I know this does not help. I am 36, have no children, and my sense of humour has failed me. sad

I know you all have been through the mill and back and I was hoping that you may have some thoughts for me. Given that I have bleeding in my uterus, is it perhaps foolish to continue to take the aspirin?

igggi Wed 01-Jun-11 13:16:09

What I'm about to post might have some bearing on your question, BrownB.
I've had some advice back from S about my spotting, basically he is advising to discontinue taking aspirin, but to continue with the steroids etc. I feel worried about doing this as taking aspirin was the one thing the NHS & Private doctors both agreed on! Oh well.

Havingkittens Wed 01-Jun-11 15:35:04

Try not to worry about that igggi, if your blood clotting tests came back clear then the asprin is pretty much empirical. I was prescribed asprin on this basis before my 6th pregnancy and it didn't make any difference so I think the steroids are the more important things to be taking as they are specifically to combat something that you have tested positive for.

Fingers crossed that stopping the asprin will help. x

digitalgirl Wed 01-Jun-11 16:26:00

brownb it sounds as though igggi has had the most recent medical advice on this so I would be tempted to stop taking aspirin. I'm really sorry that your scan didn't provide the reassurance you wanted. Are you going back in a week's time?
I'm not sure how small 10mm is for a 6 week sac - is it just a few days? If so then it could very well be fine - I was told a couple of days out is ok, a week is worrying. Fwiw I had a slow growing pregnancy with my third pregnancy after ds - I miscarried the day after the scan showed a slow heartbeat.
I'm afraid I don't know what having clots and active bleeds while pregnant means. Is it possible the clot is a fibroid? And is the active bleed anywhere near the pregnancy site?
Hugs to you - it's horrible having to go through this all again, just so very unfair. But am hoping that somehow it will work out for you.

igggi glad you've had some advice. Agree that Mr S prescribes aspirin to everyone based on empirical evidence - so it's not necessarily the one thing that's keeping you pg. It's the steroids that will stop your nk cells from telling your blood to clot in the first place, aspirin keeps your blood thin.

Thinking of both of you ladies. It brings it all back how difficult those first few weeks are.

glittery good to hear from you. Can't believe you're in your final trimester already! Get nesting lady before it's too late, 35 weeks seems to be the norm for us lot.

Well I know I shouldn't be complaining when some of you are going through the mill at the moment but I am thoroughly fed up - cd27 and still no egg sad. Have booked acupuncture tomorrow as I've not had any this cycle and wonder if that could be a reason. Still enjoying daily 'relations' but my god I think we'll deserve a medal once this cycle is over.

BrownB Wed 01-Jun-11 19:34:35

Thanks guys.. everyone is going through it here. What a hellish nightmare all round.

The sonographer put the following on the report, "A small clot is noted within the gestation sack. It measures 6x7 mm. Area of active bleed is noted around the sac and within the right wall resulting in area of clot."

Fuckit. I was starting to relax again and now am feeling as if my hopes are dashed. Again. She did say that these things can right themselves, but that really doesn't sound good.

luckyfor2 Wed 01-Jun-11 20:12:32

Hello Brown and welcome to the thread sorry you find yourself on here! I had a clot in my last pregnancy when I mc at 15 weeks (mc was nothing to do with the clot) and it was thought to be an implantation bleed and caused spotting up to around 10 weeks. I can't remember the size but it did eventually go at around 12 weeks. I had a scan this time at 5 weeks where there was just a sac and at 6 weeks when there was a tiny growth with heartbeat but if your dates are even slightly out there is not much time between the two. Its hell waiting to see what happens but I do hope everything turns out okay for you. x

igggi I never even thought about the aspirin which definately causes spotting. When I was taking it before my bfp I was spotting all the time. I asked my consultant about this and they did say that some women in pregnancy spot with aspirin but it wouldn't cause you to mc. It wasn't actually the case for me it was just a coincidence that I had cervical erosion which started right at the same time of me starting the aspirin but it definately makes sense that that could be causing the bleeding. Like digi says even though I am on it I was found to have nothing wrong with blood clotting so its more of a "see if it helps" rather than a treatment. I hope you feel slightly relieved that Mr S has found the answer. Hope the pain has eased - did he say anything about that?

Digi you and DH are doing so well! There is no way I could have lasted this long - but it will definately be worth it when everything turns out right.

I cannot believe you're 32 weeks glittery. I can't imagine getting that far it is such hard work to get through each day and the mentalling is constant. Let us know how you get on over the coming weeks, so pleased everything is working out for you.smile

Another scan tomorrow and it is definately getting harder especially as over the past few days my symptoms aren't as noticeable and can't help but think that everything has gone wrong.

Hope everyone is doing okay - glad the steroids were better for you this time kittens rubbish about AF though!

Milky when is your scan this week? Or is it next week sorry if I'm jumping the gun.

BrownB Thu 02-Jun-11 10:48:36

Glittery - as you said, it is nice to read a positive story. It's a relief to read some good news when it all seems so bleak...

milkyway07 Thu 02-Jun-11 11:43:11

In regards to the aspirin discussion, my consultant told me last week that if I should start bleeding, then I must stop taking the aspirin straightaway. So I think it is normal procedure to stop aspirin if bleeding starts. Also, I wasn't diagnosed with any blood clotting problems so it's not really a method of treatment for me.

lucky My scan is next Monday. I've been meaning to ask you, do you have a scan every week? I will be getting a scan every 2 weeks, and it is like slow torture having to wait.

igggi Thu 02-Jun-11 16:12:30

Hello. I'm sure you should be entitled to weekly scans, that's what I'd heard anyway. Just push them, if that's what you want.
Have just had blood drawn for hcg, at suggestion of early preg unit. They were the most negative I've ever heard them, have clearly written it off.
Do you think I will be offered medical management? It is nothing to them to say wait a couple of weeks, but it's hell for me. Does medical management mean you have to wait 3 months to ttc?

luckyfor2 Thu 02-Jun-11 16:58:33

Hi milky yes I do have them every week and I can understand the torture of waiting because even weekly ones seem to take a long time to come around. As igggi has said its definately worth demanding asking if thats the support you need.

igggi sorry that the EPU department were negative, they have no right to be like that with you its hard enough as it is - God these people make me so cross! Good that they've taken your hcg levels though when will you be getting the results? I can understand you trying to prepare yourself for the worst I really wish I could say something that would give you some hope. If it does help in any way at all then no you don't have to wait to ttc at all after mm but lets really hope it wont come to that this time. x

LAF77 Thu 02-Jun-11 21:57:22

Iggi I don't know how your EPU could be so dismissive of your pregnancy like that. It is such early days that I don't see how they could be so negative. I hope that Dr. S has a different view for you.

How did your scan go lucky ?

Sorry that things are not going as you want them to digital hopefully acupuncture will bring some benefits.

brownb fingers crossed that this third pg will have a better outcome. The blood clot could be producing the active bleed. I don't think it is possible to have a sense of humour during RMC, so don't feel bad that it has left the building! I'm normally full of funny things to say and laugh at, but there hasn't been much of that in my life in the last year.

Hello to glittery glad that the pg has been going well in the last few months. Hopefully, you can start to enjoy this precious time you have been given with your baby in the last few weeks.

Hope that you are feeling better pureequeen waves to milkyway and kittens

Not much to report from me, about 2.5 weeks until I see the consultant at St. Mary's to find out my blood results. I've got 2 busy weeks coming up at work, so hopefully time will fly by. Hopefully, we will get the go ahead TTC for my next cycle. I've ordered a jumbo pack of clear blue fertility monitors and pg test from Amazon in the hope that we'll get the green light on the 21st. I've been on the sidelines for so long...

luckyfor2 Fri 03-Jun-11 10:02:52

Scan was good thank you Laff measuring 12 weeks but certainly don't feel safe by any means. Lost last one at 15 weeks in Jan so I think I would need to get to 20 to start feeling slightly safe. Thank you for asking. I feel a little uncomfy posting news on here as I know some of you are going through a really bad time at the moment. Thinking of you all. xx

Hope the 2 weeks passes quickly and you can start getting use out of that monitor. I remember when you were saying ages ago that it would be in June when you would have your results - it seemed like such a long time to wait and I can't believe it is almost here. I know it has been a long time for you but I'm so pleased that the wait is almost over.

milkyway07 Fri 03-Jun-11 12:29:03

iggi I'm sorry for the EPU's negativity - you still have another hcg test to go so I don't know why they acted like that. If it helps, my consultant told me that bleeding can just be a side effect of taking aspirin, so try to remain positive. I know Mr S is world renowned, and you are in safe hands with him.

lucky I will definitely be asking for a weekly scan - if it comes to that. Congratulations on the scan, just keep positive and I am sure things will work out fine this time, but I understand how you feel about passing different time-points to feel safe.

LAF77 Good luck with the test results and I hope you can start TTC soon. I remember waiting 4 months last year to get my results and it was an excruciatingly hard time. Glad your wait is nearly over.

igggi Fri 03-Jun-11 13:16:25

Lucky that is really good news. I know you will probably no completely relax till you are in labour! Hearing that things go well for other "people like us", with our problems, really keeps me going so on my behalf please don't avoid talking about the good news.
I am so sick of the bad. EPU phoned with yesterday's blood results, HCG is only at 33 which is game over. Somehow I thought that a pregnancy complete with steriods etc would be the one to make it, so is very hard to accept I have failed again. Hasn't sunk in really.

LAF77 Fri 03-Jun-11 13:39:48

Oh Iggi I'm so sorry....will you still see Dr S tomorrow?

igggi Fri 03-Jun-11 13:43:05

Thanks Laf. Yes, I will. I have a lot of time on the train to think of what to ask him!
Toying with the idea of not ttc straight away and instead trying to lose a shed-load of weight, as that's the only thing I haven't tried.
Glad you're going to be able to get started soon.

Just poking my head round the door and saying "hello"... I'm Knitter and I was wondering if I could ask you ladies for advice and help....

Quick bit of history:

Age 34 (DH age 41)
DS1 born Aug 2008 (natural conception, easy, happy pregnancy, natural birth 10lb 6oz!)
MC1 19 March 2010 - ruptured ectopic and left tube removed
MC2 22 July 2010 - discovered on spotting at 12 weeks but 8 weeks sized foetus found... ERPC 26 July 2010
TOP 15 April 2011 - T21 and hydrops

Currently TTC and because of the three losses have been referred to St Georges, Tooting, Repeat Miscarriage Clinic - my first appointment is on the 9th of June...

I was wondering what I should expect from that appointment (I've been told to go alone - no need for DH apparently) and what i should be asking for in terms of tests etc...

thanks in advance

and <waves> to people I know from the common room / freak out room etc!

LAF77 Fri 03-Jun-11 17:29:02

iggi have you had ERPC in your previous miscarriages? Perhaps getting the karyotyping back would provide some answers? Thinking of you, it is totally crap to have this happen again.

lucky I'm glad to read positive stories, I hope that I can share something positive one day too.

knitter Sorry, you have joined us here. I had a letter come through from St. Mary's RMC confirming the tests that they have run on me. They are:

*Antiphospholipid antibodies
* activated protein C resistance
* Factor V Leiden
*Prothrombin gene mutation
*Thromboelastogram (TEG)

I'm 34 now (still getting used to saying that) and my DH is 42. I only had blood taken at the first appointment, and my second appointment last week involved a blood test and ultrasound scan. Maybe your clinic will do the same. DH came to the first appt because they wanted a blood sample to use from him for future genetic research into miscarriage, but he wasn't needed otherwise.

I had a bit of a scare at work today. All of my clearblue stuff turned up and they brought it to me with another box from Amazon that didn't have a name on it. He asked me to open it and check to see if it was for me. It wasn't, it was for someone else. That could have been so embarrassing if someone else in the office had opened my box with pregnancy tests and OPKs!

digitalgirl Fri 03-Jun-11 18:34:29

knitter in addition to LAF's list you and your dh will probably be karyotyped to rule out balanced translocation.

igggi oh god, I'm so so sorry sad. I agree that an hcg count of 33 at this stage isn't great sad. This really is so terribly unfair. I'm hoping for some sort of low-rising hcg miracle for you but know better than to dangle carrots after everything we've all been through. What did Mr S say today - were you scanned?

hairylights Fri 03-Jun-11 18:41:37

So sorry iggi

Has anyone here come to the point of giving up? I am very fearful of a fourth miscarriage - haven't had any scans yet - and feel that I simply can't go on . If this fails I feel I will have two choices - donor eggs (I know bit simple) or to just give up. At present I feel Luke I will literally go crazy at another loss.

LAF77 Sat 04-Jun-11 15:22:36

oh hairy I hope that things don't end in MC for you. When is your first scan?

IKWYM about giving up. I'm scared to try again because I don't know how I could possibly cope with another loss. That's what pg is to me, miscarriage. I want a baby though so I have to find a way to be strong. I want to be on the graduates list here!

How did it go today iggi ? thinking of you.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Sat 04-Jun-11 22:45:49

STARTING TESTING
LOLA78: mc1 Dec 07 (6wks), DD Oct 08 (problem free pregnancy and natural birth), mmc2 Nov 10 6wks ERPC at 10wks, mc3 Feb 11 at 7wks - suspected ectopic but mc naturally, mc4 mar 11 at 5wks (started 75mg aspirin from a week before bfp) - hospitalised for excessive bleeding and clots. Now referred for testing at local fertility clinic, we have started having blood tests and am on 5mg folic acid.
SCOOTERCHASTER: DS Oct 08 (managed for SVT heart from 35wks), mc1 Sept 10 (7wks), mc2 Dec 10 (9 wks - hb @ 8wks), mc3 April 11 (7.5 wks, hb day b4 mc).
HAIRYLIGHTS, age 42, MC1 (Jun 10, very low HCG, suspected ectopic, methotrexate), MC 2 (Nov 22 2010, MMC,ERPC, no heart beat at ten weeks, fetus 8 week size), MC3 (MMC - Medical Management, Feb 13 2011, MMC at 7 week scan). Waiting to TTC
PANDA 3MMC, no.1 (embryonic loss - empty sac) 7weeks, no.2 at 12 weeks, no.3 at 8 weeks. Awaiting raft of tests for recurrent MC
CLAIREDELOON Age 38 1st mmc, development stopped approx 5 weeks (2007), 2nd mmc development stopped at approx 6 weeks (2009), 3rd mc development stopped at 9 weeks after seeing hb at 8+3 (2010). Bicornate uterus, starting testing Feb 2011.
NOTSOBARRENBROOK Age 35. 1st mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2009), 2nd mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2010), 3rd mmc @ 11 weeks, development stopped at 6 weeks 3 days (March 2010), 4th mmc @ 5 weeks (August 2010). Possible adenomyosis, awaiting hsg and results of testing from St Mary's.
MILKYWAY2007 Age 28 - DD age 3. 1st MC Oct 2009, 6 weeks. 2nd MMC March 2010, 11 weeks (baby passed away at 7 weeks). 3rd MC July 2010, 6 weeks. 4th MMC 24 Jan 2011, 9 weeks - no amniotic sac, baby measured 7weeks 4 days, no HB, had seen a healthy HB at 7 weeks. Blood clotting, hormone, genetic karyotype and shape and health of uterus checked and all clear. High dose folic acid prescribed.
LUCKYFOR2 Age 32 - DD age 5. DD age 3. 1st MC May 2010 found at 12 week scan passed away at 9 weeks. 2nd MC September 2010 natural at 8 weeks. 3nd MC January 2011 at 16 weeks, saw hb at 13 but no hb at 15.5. All tests have come back clear. Going to take Aspirin and Progesterone in next pregnancy (will be on Promise trial) currently ttc.
IGGI999 - Age 40, 3 year old DS. 3 MC last year, at 6, 8 and 8 weeks. Last two had hb detected. NHS blood tests came back clear, except for presence of antinuclear antibodies. To take aspirin for this. Going to see Shehata in May as think steroids are needed.
CONFU3ED - Age 35 1st MC 1998 14 weeks. DD age 11. 2nd MC July 2009 5.5 weeks. ERPC Twice. No tests. 6 months Clomid 3rd MC January 2010. The foetus sent for testing - came back fine. Been referred to recurrent MC clinic at the hospital for tests, waiting for appointment. Was told I have PCOS through a scan but never diagnosed.

UNDERGOING TREATMENT
HAVINGKITTENS Age 41 - MMC1 Nov 07 8wks (discovered due to bleeding at 10.5wks) ERPC, TOP1 for TS21 Aug 08, TOP2 for TS21 Feb 09, TOP incomplete, ERPC performed, Genetic Counselling & tests confirmed no chromosome problems with us, "just bad luck ", MMC2 Feb 10 5.5wks (seen at 8wk scan, no bleeding), MMC3 May 10 (as MMC2), RMC testing at UCH, no cause found - empirical 75mg asprin & vit D + early & regular scans for next pregnancy, MMC4 No fetal pole seen at 6.5 wks, follow up scan 10 days later, told of MMC, then "Something" spotted so instructed to wait another week before they would allow ERPC, ERPC a week later, waiting for NK Cell test results from Mr S on NHS, taking 75mg Asprin, Vit D, Pregnacare Plus (w/Omega 3), 5mg Folic Acid (been taking since 1st TOP to try & prevent TS21 or similar issues), NK Cells levels almost double what they should be. 25mg Prednisone from ovulation - CD1 or if BFP then 'til 12 wks and then weaned off 'til 14wks plus Progesterone pessaries from BFP - 16wks, Folic Acid, Omega3, Vit D - 12wks, Asprin - 20wks.
CRYSTAL5 Age 38 - DS age 4. 6 m/c 1 at 11 weeks, 5 at 5/6 weeks. Ok blood tests, under Endocrinologist for Hypothyroid
LADYBEE 37, MC1 (5wks), DS (2), MC2 blighted ovum discovered @ 8 wk scan, MC3 natural @ 9 wks following hb seen at 7 1/2 wk. PCOS previously diagnosed, Factor V Leiden heterozygote discovered in recent testing. Treatment with aspirin (from BFP) + clexane started at 6 weeks. MC4 MMC @ 8.1 wks (discovered @ 11 wk scan) following hb seen at 6+6 wks. Consultant suggests aspirin + clexane to start at 4 weeks, plus progesterone pessaries. Management of MC tbc.
DIGITALGIRL Age 32 - DS 2.8 - 4MCs since ttc#2. MC1 Nov2009 @5wks. MC2 Apr2010 @6-7wks. MC3 Oct2010 @7-8wks. MC4 Mar2011 @8wks. All natural, except MC4 managed with ERPC for karyotyping. Clotting tests normal. DH & I genetically normal. On Metformin for mild PCOS, plus 75mg aspirin, Pregnacare Plus & 25mcg VitD3. Diagnosed with high NK Cells (1.25) after MC4. Starting TTC in May with prednisolone from ovulation and will add cyclogest once pg. Under care of Mr S.
PUREEQUEEN Age 34, MC1 (7 weeks Jan 08) MC2 (6 weeks March 08), DS born (prem) 2009, MC3 (9 weeks Oct 10). MC4 Jan 2011. First 2 natural mcs latter 2 mmc/ERPCs. Chromosome test MC4 showed she had a genetic abnormality (cri du chat). Karotyping for me and DH fine but with "increase in length on satellite of short arm 13 and 15" (??) . Also have endo &septate uterus. Now TTC and will take aspirin and progesterone.
LAF77 , Age 33, MC1 (7 weeks Apr 10) MC2 (5 weeks Sept 10) MC3 (9 weeks Dec 10). All have been natural mcs and number 1 and 3 were embryonic . No children, First appointment with St. Mary's in April, second round of bloods in May, with results in June.

PREGNANT
MATTSMAMA Aged 41. 1st MMC November 2004. My DS (who I love with all my heart) born 2006. 2nd MMC July 2010. 2 chemical pregnancies September and October 2010. Under Dr Shehata and got BFP on first round of treatment for high thyroid antibodies and high killer cells.
BANANA87 Age 30- 1mmc@7 weeks, DD (2), 1 mmc 6 weeks, 1 mc 7 weeks, Going to try aspirin and progesterone as per consultant. Clotting bloods normal.
MUMMYABROAD Age 36, 1DS (2.9), 1MMC Mar 2010 (@14weeks) Ashermans diagnosis and treatment Nov 2010, Started TTC Jan 2011 BFP on Cycle 2 EDD 4/11/11. Heartbeat seen at 10 weeks.
GLITTERYBITS 1 anembryonic MC (12 weeks), unexplained infertility, 1 round of clomid, currently pg and terrified!
JUSTMEE Age 21, MC1 (7 weeks), MC2 (6weeks), MC3 (5weeks) currently pregnant with 4th pregnancy using clexane injecting 20mg a day EDD 24/09/11
LOVELYBUNCHOFCOCONUTS Age 23, 1 MC (13 weeks), 1 MMC (10 weeks - growth stopped at 7), 1DD born 2008, PCOS diagnosis, bi-cornuate uterus. EDD 01/10/11
LOVEMYSLEEP Age 39, 1 mmc, dd born(now 5), 2nd mc (9wks, 2days), 3rd mc (9wks, 3days) and 4th mc at 5 wks. All tests on NHS came back clear. Currently undergoing treatment with Dr.Shehata for very high natural killer cells - aspirin, progesterone, steroids, omezaprole and one intralipid infusion completed.

GRADUATES WITH BABIES!!
LUNATIC dd1(4) 2 mmc (8 wks) dd2 stillborn (32+5). Seen at St Mary's. clotting problem, pg #5 aspirin 150g daily. Ds1 born 9/2/11 c/s @ 35 wks
STILLFRAZZLED Age 35, DS1 (3.6yo), 1 mc @ 5 weeks Jan 09, 2nd mc @ 9 weeks March 09, DS2 born @ 35+3 on 04/01/11 with Intra Uterine Growth Restriction but currently home and doing well.
MUMATRON Age 28 2 dc then 4mc, 3 @9weeks 1@5weeks, tests showed possible free protein s ishoo. dd2 born 06/01/2011, aspirin, claxane and high dose folic acid through pg.
JULEZBOO Age 29 1 mc @ 14 wks, DS1 (8yo) 4 mc @ 5/6 wks, DS2 (3) 2 mc @7 wks... DS3 (14/01/11 @35 wks) Dx with Factor V Leiden and Septate Uterus. Clexane and Aspirin throughout pregnancy and progesterone with DS3.

Here is the list, which has not been posted since the opening of this thread!

If anyone needs to update themselves, add any info to their piece or move themselves please go ahead smile

lunatic lovely to hear from you smile Always welcoming positive endings smile

iggi sorry to hear your news, never gets easier sad

Hello to everyone else smile

igggi Sun 05-Jun-11 07:57:26

Hello, well I stopped the progesterone on friday night and by Saturday am I was bleeding. Lots of large clots in the toilets in Kings Cross, so I suspect it is over or almost over. A good appt with S, he says I have aggressive immune system and just to stick with his treatment. To him 4 mc is not very many! I don't want to join the poor folk into double figures sad
It is easier not being pg, as I have nothing to fear.

igggi Sun 05-Jun-11 07:57:26

Hello, well I stopped the progesterone on friday night and by Saturday am I was bleeding. Lots of large clots in the toilets in Kings Cross, so I suspect it is over or almost over. A good appt with S, he says I have aggressive immune system and just to stick with his treatment. To him 4 mc is not very many! I don't want to join the poor folk into double figures sad
It is easier not being pg, as I have nothing to fear.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Sun 05-Jun-11 09:59:58

Oh iggi so sorry. It just isn't fair sad

hairylights Sun 05-Jun-11 10:01:53

So sorry Iggi

I am marking the due date of the only baby who really even grew.
"She" lived to eight weeks inside me and had she lived, she would have been due to have been born today. sad

igggi Sun 05-Jun-11 10:17:52

Oh Hairy I hope you have some time and space today to just do whatever you need to. A sad time.
I don't think about this often but I do believe in life after death and sometimes I think about holding all my babies when I get there.

digitalgirl Sun 05-Jun-11 11:10:14

igggi sorry to hear it's all over sad. I know exactly how you feel about it being easier not being pregnant. Almost a relief. But so glad Mr S was reassuring. He really does help with that long-term optimism.

hairy thinking of you on this due date. I have one coming up this week too. For my third lost baby.

Still no ovulation here (cd30 or thereabouts) so haven't started the steroids yet. I am currently sitting in the waiting room of a reiki healer. Will report back.

BagofHolly Sun 05-Jun-11 11:19:04

I'm sorry to crash this thread, but wondered if any of you are on clexane and cyclogest and are having to pay for it yourselves?

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Sun 05-Jun-11 11:41:58

digi my mum is a reiki healer. I am a skeptic but there have been so many stories about success after a reiki treatment. It was through reiki that my mum discovered a hernia she had. Her GP was shock grin

Really hope it can bring you some peace. Expect a few tears as it really brings out the emotional side of things. Hope it goes well for you.

iloveblue Sun 05-Jun-11 12:01:46

Hello everyone

Firstly - just wanted to say I'm sorry for all the losses and heartbreak held in this thread, I've just skimmed through and its so unfair.

I think I might be about to join you, if thats ok.

I'm currently 6ish weeks pregnant - but started bleeding lightly this morning and am cramping. This is how my last mc started so I'm pretty sure its over.

My history so far:
DS 1 aged 6 (problem-free pregnancy)
DS 2 aged 4 (problem-free pregnancy)
Late loss at 20 weeks in Oct 2010 (baby boy died at 17 wks)
7/8 wk mc Feb 2011

I had some tests done after our late loss which all came back clear and they found nothing wrong with the baby.

What I really want to know - is what happens next?
I'm assuming I will be referred for RMC testing now - but how long will that take? I'm in Shropshire if that makes any difference.

I'm going to ring my GP tomorrow who will hopefully refer me to the EPU.
I just can't continue to believe that its just down to bad luck - not now.
I know how lucky I am to have 2 children and they are the light of my life - but I'm not quite ready to give up hoping for a third just yet.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Sun 05-Jun-11 13:07:46

Hello Iloveblue. Firstly, sorry you find yourself here. It is unfair and nobody deserves the heartache of losing a baby, let alone more than one.

I can't offer much advice as I never went down the RMC route (as I 'only' had 2 mcs) but plenty of ladies here have a wealth of information and knowledge to help you ask the right questions at your appointments, if you do go down the testing route.

We have a list of everyone on this thread, just a few posts up from this. When you feel ready, feel free to add yourself on to whichever section you feel is best.

Make yourself comfy here, this is a great support thread to be on. smile

Havingkittens Sun 05-Jun-11 14:03:17

Igggi I'm so sorry you're going through this again. It's just rotten sad. I'm glad, at least that Mr S is still hopeful that things can work out for you. maybe he will review your treatment for next time, or perhaps feels you have a better chance starting earlier with the steroids.

Sorry, I've been quiet on here these past few days. I'm faced with a bit of a dilemma at the moment. My stepmother passed away on Wednesday. She had been ill in hospital since the beginning of April, over in Costa Rica which is where my Dad and she have been living for the last 12 years or so. My stepsister, who lives in LA, has been over there and will be there until the end of the month but her 3 month compassionate leave will be over so she has to go back to work. Ideally I'd like to go out and give my Dad some support and company but due to work commitments wouldn't be able to go until August. Now, I don't know what to do about TTC. I'm pretty nervous about the prospect of long haul travel if I am newly pregnant and also of being in a tropical country. Especially one where my stepmother's death was very probably due to repeated error and negligence of the local hospital (that's another story which I won't go into). If I were younger, I would consider taking the 3 month break from TTC but the fact that my Mum and Grandmother both started their menopause around 43 (I'm 41) makes me feel like I can ill afford 3 months. I have had the relevant vaccinations as I was over there 2 years ago and I think they are still valid but I'm scared of taking any risks after 6 losses already. What would you lot do under these circumstances?

My apologies for lack of personals. My brain's a bit preoccupied at the moment.

igggi Sun 05-Jun-11 14:18:06

Oh that's tough HavingKittens. Am sorry for your loss.
Is it a possibility to bring your dad over to you, rather than you to him? In many ways that would be a better break for him surely.
Bagsofholly if you see a doctor privately, the prescription will be private - I pay for 2 medicines myself.

igggi Sun 05-Jun-11 14:18:07

Oh that's tough HavingKittens. Am sorry for your loss.
Is it a possibility to bring your dad over to you, rather than you to him? In many ways that would be a better break for him surely.
Bagsofholly if you see a doctor privately, the prescription will be private - I pay for 2 medicines myself.

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Sun 05-Jun-11 14:20:58

Kittens, mummyabroad lives in Costa Rica. Perhaps you could PM her and ask about healthcare options over there. I remember her saying private treatment isn't too expensive over there.

Sorry for the loss of your stepmum.

Havingkittens Sun 05-Jun-11 18:14:31

Thank you. Unfortunately it won't be practical for my Dad to come over here. I don't have the space to put him up and he can't afford to stay in a hotel. Also, he has to go back to work. I guess I will have to play it by ear. As my OH has pointed out, I'm not pregnant yet so there's no point in worrying about it at this point. If it does become an issue I will PM mummyabroad, thanks coconuts. I will call him next week when he's back at work and see how the land lies.

BagofHolly Sun 05-Jun-11 18:33:55

It's just that I have loads left from my last cycle and can't face binning them. PM me, if you're interested.

milkyways Sun 05-Jun-11 18:57:25

I'm so sorry iggi. sad.

Havingkittens Sun 05-Jun-11 21:17:36

That's very kind of you BagofHolly - I am personally not prescribed Clexane and have enough Cyclagest for a couple of weeks into pregnancy, by which time I don't think I will have to pay for it as mine is an NHS prescription. But I'm sure someone will be only too delighted to take them off your hands.

BagofHolly Sun 05-Jun-11 22:03:21

I do hope so, they're just sitting in the cupboard!

digitalgirl Mon 06-Jun-11 09:14:10

iloveblue so sorry you've found yourself here on this thread. But welcome. I've not had a late loss but after three losses I was referred to a consultant by my epu and had all the recurrent miscarriage tests available at my hospital (anti-phospholipid and karyotyping) - I was sent to another to get a full thrombophilia screening (more clotting tests). I had an appointment where I ran through my pregnancy history and then we waited for the results. 2 months later I got the all clear at the same time as a bfp.
Unfortunately that didn't work out either and there was nothing else my consultant could do for me so I went to see Mr Shehata privately at the Miscarriage Clinic and am ttc on his treatment program.

Sorry to hear about your stepmother kittens - I hope you work out a way to be there for your dad.

Reiki was very emotional coconuts - but ultimately I came away feeling very positive.

Nice to hear from you lunatic. I feel like I've been on this thread for far too long without any progress - but that's not true, I've got a diagnosis.

Hope you're taking care of yourself igggi

iloveblue Mon 06-Jun-11 10:00:29

Hi digitalgirl
Thanks for sharing your history with me - so sorry for your losses, and hope you get lucky this time. I've heard great things about Mr S.

Do you have NK cells?

I've had some more spotting this morning - have a scan at 3.15pm, but I'm expecting the worst really.

milkyways Mon 06-Jun-11 10:30:19

Hi all just came back from the epu. Everything was fine again. They agreed to a weekly scan. So i'm going back next week. The sonographer gave us 2 scan pictures this time. I wish I could tell her not to give me them as having the pictures will make any loss much harder now.

digitalgirl Mon 06-Jun-11 11:22:24

iloveblue I really hope it's good news and if you haven't started bleeding heavily it could well be. I had spotting and some cramping with my first pregnancy with ds - so I always cling onto hope until the very end. And yes, I do have high nk cells - which in some ways was a relief to find out after all previous tests had come back clear.

milkyway v pleased to hear all is still well. And weekly scans sounds like a great tlc approach.

brownb if you're lurking I hope you're ok. Wondering if you have a follow up scan this week.

Well I thought I'd fill you in a bit more on my reiki session. Like coconuts I'm also very much a skeptic on these matters. I hate it when people attribute miscarriages to negative thinking or god's will - as I either find it insulting (you saying I caused the mc by not smiling enough?) or ridiculous (so only praying, not a medical diagnosis will help my next pregnancy succeed?). Anyway, so when my sister suggested i book a Reiki session with a woman who also did a spiritual reading for her (ie a medium) I wasn't sure it was the right thing to do. Eventually I agreed that I got a lot out of visualising and chanting chakras in yoga and thought it couldn't hurt to give Reiki a go.
When it came to my session she said she would do a reading first - must admit I was curious so I agreed. Some of what she said was generic enough for me to rationalise away but other things were spooky. She picked up on the number 5 (5 pregnancies), knew March was significant (my last mc) and that it was about as much as I could take, and said next time would be fine. There was a bunch of other stuff which i wont bore you with. I know it could all be mumbo jumbo but she could have easily hedged her bets and said something a bit more vague. She did the reiki bit - during which I couldn't stop crying - and afterwards said she could visualise me giving birth to a fully grown baby. So I left feeling spooked, light headed but happy. Part of me - the hippy part - had actually been scared that she'd have bad news for me. But she couldn't have been more positive. She even picked up on my pcos. Said my right ovary was 'blocked'. All very weird, completely unscientific. My head is chuckling but my heart desperately wants to believe her.
Ok, you can all laugh now...

LAF77 thanks for the list of tests - At least I'll have an idea what they're going on about/what to expect!

digi Thanks for the heads-up about DH too...

I should have said that the CVS full-results showed that there was no translocation so in theory we're just very unlucky... My other (secret and not mentioned to DH) worry is that we had DS before DH went to Afghanistan for 6 months with the RAF, and then we've had the three losses since he's been back - anyone think there might be some mileage in this... I'll mention it to the hospital but don't think i should freak DH out yet...

Iggi and iloveblue sorry to hear about the bleeding sad

Adding myself to the list:

STARTING TESTING
LOLA78: mc1 Dec 07 (6wks), DD Oct 08 (problem free pregnancy and natural birth), mmc2 Nov 10 6wks ERPC at 10wks, mc3 Feb 11 at 7wks - suspected ectopic but mc naturally, mc4 mar 11 at 5wks (started 75mg aspirin from a week before bfp) - hospitalised for excessive bleeding and clots. Now referred for testing at local fertility clinic, we have started having blood tests and am on 5mg folic acid.
SCOOTERCHASTER: DS Oct 08 (managed for SVT heart from 35wks), mc1 Sept 10 (7wks), mc2 Dec 10 (9 wks - hb @ 8wks), mc3 April 11 (7.5 wks, hb day b4 mc).
HAIRYLIGHTS, age 42, MC1 (Jun 10, very low HCG, suspected ectopic, methotrexate), MC 2 (Nov 22 2010, MMC,ERPC, no heart beat at ten weeks, fetus 8 week size), MC3 (MMC - Medical Management, Feb 13 2011, MMC at 7 week scan). Waiting to TTC
PANDA 3MMC, no.1 (embryonic loss - empty sac) 7weeks, no.2 at 12 weeks, no.3 at 8 weeks. Awaiting raft of tests for recurrent MC
CLAIREDELOON Age 38 1st mmc, development stopped approx 5 weeks (2007), 2nd mmc development stopped at approx 6 weeks (2009), 3rd mc development stopped at 9 weeks after seeing hb at 8+3 (2010). Bicornate uterus, starting testing Feb 2011.
NOTSOBARRENBROOK Age 35. 1st mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2009), 2nd mmc @ 6 weeks (Jan 2010), 3rd mmc @ 11 weeks, development stopped at 6 weeks 3 days (March 2010), 4th mmc @ 5 weeks (August 2010). Possible adenomyosis, awaiting hsg and results of testing from St Mary's.
MILKYWAY2007 Age 28 - DD age 3. 1st MC Oct 2009, 6 weeks. 2nd MMC March 2010, 11 weeks (baby passed away at 7 weeks). 3rd MC July 2010, 6 weeks. 4th MMC 24 Jan 2011, 9 weeks - no amniotic sac, baby measured 7weeks 4 days, no HB, had seen a healthy HB at 7 weeks. Blood clotting, hormone, genetic karyotype and shape and health of uterus checked and all clear. High dose folic acid prescribed.
LUCKYFOR2 Age 32 - DD age 5. DD age 3. 1st MC May 2010 found at 12 week scan passed away at 9 weeks. 2nd MC September 2010 natural at 8 weeks. 3nd MC January 2011 at 16 weeks, saw hb at 13 but no hb at 15.5. All tests have come back clear. Going to take Aspirin and Progesterone in next pregnancy (will be on Promise trial) currently ttc.
IGGI999 - Age 40, 3 year old DS. 3 MC last year, at 6, 8 and 8 weeks. Last two had hb detected. NHS blood tests came back clear, except for presence of antinuclear antibodies. To take aspirin for this. Going to see Shehata in May as think steroids are needed.
CONFU3ED - Age 35 1st MC 1998 14 weeks. DD age 11. 2nd MC July 2009 5.5 weeks. ERPC Twice. No tests. 6 months Clomid 3rd MC January 2010. The foetus sent for testing - came back fine. Been referred to recurrent MC clinic at the hospital for tests, waiting for appointment. Was told I have PCOS through a scan but never diagnosed.
KNITTERNOTTWITTER - Age 34 (DH age 41) DS1 born Aug 2008 (natural conception, easy, happy pregnancy, natural birth 10lb 6oz!) Loss 1: MC1 19 March 2010 - ruptured ectopic and left tube removed. Loss 2: MC2 22 July 2010 - Foetus seen at 5 weeks and HB at 7 weeks, no HB on spotting at 12 weeks, 8 weeks sized foetus found... ERPC 26 July 2010. Loss 3: April 2011 TOP - HB seen at 6 weeks and 9 weeks, large Nuchal measurement and bad bloods at 12 week scan - CVS - confirmed T21 and hydrops, no chromozonal translocation - removed by ERPC 15 April 2011 . Currently TTC and because of the three losses have been referred to St Georges, Tooting, Repeat Miscarriage Clinic - my first appointment is on the 9th of June...

UNDERGOING TREATMENT
HAVINGKITTENS Age 41 - MMC1 Nov 07 8wks (discovered due to bleeding at 10.5wks) ERPC, TOP1 for TS21 Aug 08, TOP2 for TS21 Feb 09, TOP incomplete, ERPC performed, Genetic Counselling & tests confirmed no chromosome problems with us, "just bad luck ", MMC2 Feb 10 5.5wks (seen at 8wk scan, no bleeding), MMC3 May 10 (as MMC2), RMC testing at UCH, no cause found - empirical 75mg asprin & vit D + early & regular scans for next pregnancy, MMC4 No fetal pole seen at 6.5 wks, follow up scan 10 days later, told of MMC, then "Something" spotted so instructed to wait another week before they would allow ERPC, ERPC a week later, waiting for NK Cell test results from Mr S on NHS, taking 75mg Asprin, Vit D, Pregnacare Plus (w/Omega 3), 5mg Folic Acid (been taking since 1st TOP to try & prevent TS21 or similar issues), NK Cells levels almost double what they should be. 25mg Prednisone from ovulation - CD1 or if BFP then 'til 12 wks and then weaned off 'til 14wks plus Progesterone pessaries from BFP - 16wks, Folic Acid, Omega3, Vit D - 12wks, Asprin - 20wks.
CRYSTAL5 Age 38 - DS age 4. 6 m/c 1 at 11 weeks, 5 at 5/6 weeks. Ok blood tests, under Endocrinologist for Hypothyroid
LADYBEE 37, MC1 (5wks), DS (2), MC2 blighted ovum discovered @ 8 wk scan, MC3 natural @ 9 wks following hb seen at 7 1/2 wk. PCOS previously diagnosed, Factor V Leiden heterozygote discovered in recent testing. Treatment with aspirin (from BFP) + clexane started at 6 weeks. MC4 MMC @ 8.1 wks (discovered @ 11 wk scan) following hb seen at 6+6 wks. Consultant suggests aspirin + clexane to start at 4 weeks, plus progesterone pessaries. Management of MC tbc.
DIGITALGIRL Age 32 - DS 2.8 - 4MCs since ttc#2. MC1 Nov2009 @5wks. MC2 Apr2010 @6-7wks. MC3 Oct2010 @7-8wks. MC4 Mar2011 @8wks. All natural, except MC4 managed with ERPC for karyotyping. Clotting tests normal. DH & I genetically normal. On Metformin for mild PCOS, plus 75mg aspirin, Pregnacare Plus & 25mcg VitD3. Diagnosed with high NK Cells (1.25) after MC4. Starting TTC in May with prednisolone from ovulation and will add cyclogest once pg. Under care of Mr S.
PUREEQUEEN Age 34, MC1 (7 weeks Jan 08) MC2 (6 weeks March 08), DS born (prem) 2009, MC3 (9 weeks Oct 10). MC4 Jan 2011. First 2 natural mcs latter 2 mmc/ERPCs. Chromosome test MC4 showed she had a genetic abnormality (cri du chat). Karotyping for me and DH fine but with "increase in length on satellite of short arm 13 and 15" (??) . Also have endo &septate uterus. Now TTC and will take aspirin and progesterone.
LAF77 , Age 33, MC1 (7 weeks Apr 10) MC2 (5 weeks Sept 10) MC3 (9 weeks Dec 10). All have been natural mcs and number 1 and 3 were embryonic . No children, First appointment with St. Mary's in April, second round of bloods in May, with results in June.

PREGNANT
MATTSMAMA Aged 41. 1st MMC November 2004. My DS (who I love with all my heart) born 2006. 2nd MMC July 2010. 2 chemical pregnancies September and October 2010. Under Dr Shehata and got BFP on first round of treatment for high thyroid antibodies and high killer cells.
BANANA87 Age 30- 1mmc@7 weeks, DD (2), 1 mmc 6 weeks, 1 mc 7 weeks, Going to try aspirin and progesterone as per consultant. Clotting bloods normal.
MUMMYABROAD Age 36, 1DS (2.9), 1MMC Mar 2010 (@14weeks) Ashermans diagnosis and treatment Nov 2010, Started TTC Jan 2011 BFP on Cycle 2 EDD 4/11/11. Heartbeat seen at 10 weeks.
GLITTERYBITS 1 anembryonic MC (12 weeks), unexplained infertility, 1 round of clomid, currently pg and terrified!
JUSTMEE Age 21, MC1 (7 weeks), MC2 (6weeks), MC3 (5weeks) currently pregnant with 4th pregnancy using clexane injecting 20mg a day EDD 24/09/11
LOVELYBUNCHOFCOCONUTS Age 23, 1 MC (13 weeks), 1 MMC (10 weeks - growth stopped at 7), 1DD born 2008, PCOS diagnosis, bi-cornuate uterus. EDD 01/10/11
LOVEMYSLEEP Age 39, 1 mmc, dd born(now 5), 2nd mc (9wks, 2days), 3rd mc (9wks, 3days) and 4th mc at 5 wks. All tests on NHS came back clear. Currently undergoing treatment with Dr.Shehata for very high natural killer cells - aspirin, progesterone, steroids, omezaprole and one intralipid infusion completed.

GRADUATES WITH BABIES!!
LUNATIC dd1(4) 2 mmc (8 wks) dd2 stillborn (32+5). Seen at St Mary's. clotting problem, pg #5 aspirin 150g daily. Ds1 born 9/2/11 c/s @ 35 wks
STILLFRAZZLED Age 35, DS1 (3.6yo), 1 mc @ 5 weeks Jan 09, 2nd mc @ 9 weeks March 09, DS2 born @ 35+3 on 04/01/11 with Intra Uterine Growth Restriction but currently home and doing well.
MUMATRON Age 28 2 dc then 4mc, 3 @9weeks 1@5weeks, tests showed possible free protein s ishoo. dd2 born 06/01/2011, aspirin, claxane and high dose folic acid through pg.
JULEZBOO Age 29 1 mc @ 14 wks, DS1 (8yo) 4 mc @ 5/6 wks, DS2 (3) 2 mc @7 wks... DS3 (14/01/11 @35 wks) Dx with Factor V Leiden and Septate Uterus. Clexane and Aspirin throughout pregnancy and progesterone with DS3.

SleepyCaz Mon 06-Jun-11 13:58:15

I am having my fourth MC at the moment. All have been under 9 weeks.

The thing is, will I be offered any investigations, being as they have not been in a row, and also because I already have two DC's? I had DS, then 2 MC's, then DD and another 2 MC's.

No idea what to ask for when I go to scan on Weds. Scan is just to check MC is complete.

TIA.

SleepyCaz sorry to hear that you think things aren't going well for your pregnancy. sad

I don't know what the policies are where you live but thought it was worth replying with my experience. I've had three losses now and have been referred to the repeat misscarriage clinic even though my losses aren't all 'typical' misscarriages - an ectopic, then a MMC then a TOP for Downs.

I'm sure that the fact your losses aren't consecutive shouldn't be a factor - I suggest that you push for a referral to a RMC - either the EPU or your doctor should refer you.

Hope that helps

luckyfor2 Mon 06-Jun-11 21:22:42

I haven't been on for a few days and missed so much. DD1 has had v.high temp and sickness poor little thing but has now suddenly sprung back to normal thank goodness.

I am so sorry to hear your news igggi I was so hoping that everything would turn out right for you and can't believe you have to go through it all again. I'm glad Mr S is confident for the future. Big hugs to you x

milky so very pleased your scan went well and they have agreed to scan you weekly. I know what you mean about the pics I have pics for every week so far and kind of feel the same as you but what I do know is that the pictures wont make it any more/less painful if something happens.

kittens sorry about your stepmother. Not sure what I would do, its a tricky one but it might be a good idea to contact mummya like coconuts said if you find yourself pregnant and needing medical care.

Ilove hello honey sorry you feel you need to join us on here. I hope everything has turned out okay for you this afternoon. Please let us know how you got on.

sleepycaz welcome and again sorry you find yourself on here. The fact that you have had 2DC has no difference to when they test but most places wait until you have had the magical three mc (cause one isn't quite enough!) but its worth pushing it. I think some places may refer you after 2 but it really depends on where you live.

Hairy I know how you feel about giving up and if this pregnancy goes wrong I really don't know what I will do. It is such a painful experience to go through and very hard to try each time. I know you're terrified of having a scan - have you decided when you might have one? Sorry about your due date on Sunday I hope you didn't put too much pressure on yourself and you were looked after.

knitter Hi and again sorry you find yourself on here.

LAF not long now until your results - next week I think?

Hi to Digi and coconuts and anyone else who I haven't mentioned.

iloveblue Mon 06-Jun-11 21:45:01

Hi luckyfor2

I'm sure I've 'met' you on another thread - we had similar mc experiences if I remember rightly.

The scan was inconclusive - they saw a 'cystic area' which is probably an early pregnancy but it was too early to tell if it was viable. I'm not quite 6wks.

They also saw a pocket of fluid which could be a burst cyst and would explain the spotting and pains. The midwife said it could also be implantation spotting although I thought that happened earlier.
I had blood taken to test hormone levels and have to go back on Weds morning.
I havn't had anymore bleeding (touch wood) and cramps have settled so its just wait and see I suppose.

The midwife went through what will happen if it does end badly again - we will be referred for testing. Will take 3 months all in all - so its nice to have a plan in place anyway.

digitalgirl Tue 07-Jun-11 12:24:12

iloveblue a small relief to find out what could be causing the spotting. I was told my bleeding in ds pregnancy was from implantation but it happened in weeks 4-8. Really hope you get an hcg rise tomorrow.

sleepycaz so sorry to hear you're going through your 4th miscarriage sad. I think some (but not all) consultants will test after two consecutive mc's especially if you've had 4 in total. Ask your gp to refer you to your local recurrent miscarriage clinic - this is sometimes part of the gynae dept or epu at some hospitals. Some epus will let you self refer if you tell them this is your fourth miscarriage. And if it's too difficult to call and make these enquiries ask your dh or a friend to do it.

igggi Tue 07-Jun-11 14:13:52

Hi, hope things are going well for everyone today. I thought this mc was "over" but having strange pains this morning - I hope there is nothing left to come out. DH has caught the stomach bug I had and also hurt his back - I feel like he has hijacked my recovery time and there's no sympathy left for me!

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts Tue 07-Jun-11 16:45:00

Just a quickie for digi Sounds like the reiki was very positive. It is so hard in situations as these to not take everything they say and think Yes I'm cured but then OTOH, equally as hard to just say Meh it's all mumbo jumbo. The seed has been planted, as it were, in your brain. This is why I'm so skeptical.

I have never let my mum perform Reiki on me as I was too scared. Scared that she might actually make me believe and scared she would see my secrets and emotions and my insides and tell me something was definitively wrong with me and I'd never have another baby. I didn't want that finalisation, eventhough I can sit here and say I don't believe anyway, it would still have been in my head. I'm rambling now, but you get my gist grin

My mum has told me the sex of my two mc babies and knew DD would be a girl and knew this would be a boy. General things, she has a 50/50 chance of being wrong or right, and the sex of my babies I'd never know.

But OTOH, she has done a reiki on someone and sensed a tumour. That person was diagnosed with cancer within a matter of weeks. Spooky.

iggi Hope you are doing ok as can be.

caz sorry things aren't going well for you either sad

Waves to everyone else I haven't mentioned and who may be lurking.

milkyways Tue 07-Jun-11 17:24:39

Digital- it sounds like your reiki session has left you feeling positive which is a good thing. I actually love reiki healing music - I always listen to it to calm me down when i'm feeling stressed.

Sleepycaz - sorry you are having another mc. I agree with the others - you need to push your GP to refer you to a RMC as having 2 dc doesn't mean you might not have a problem. Whilst waiting to be referred you can have some tests done by your GP such as thyroid, prolactin and hormone tests during your cycle. I also recommend getting a vitamin D test done to see if you are deficient. You really need to push your doctors to get treatment which is unfortunate.

Lucky - hope your dd is better now, have you had a scan this week? Hope all is well.

Iloveblue - fx for rising hcg levels.

Iggi - with my second mc, my dh got chicken pox a day after my erpc, and then with my last mc he got the flu a day after my medical management. At first I was okay about it as it kept me busy but a few days later I completely broke down as it felt like he was getting all the attention. I hope you're resting yourself and feel better soon.

iloveblue Tue 07-Jun-11 19:37:46

Thanks digi and milkyways
The midwife did mention implantation bleeding as a possibility but I thought it happened earlier. No spotting or cramps today and I've been feeling naseous so I'm feeling more positive.

I'm sorry for being so me-obsessed yesterday.
Forgot to ask how you are getting on lucky? How many weeks are you now?

I'm sorry to hear what you've been going through iggi and that you've had more pains.

sleepycaz - so sorry for your losses. I agree with digi and milky - you should push for a referral.

Cocomuts that is spooky about your mum.

digitalgirl Tue 07-Jun-11 19:38:31

igggi bloody men and their getting ill at the wrong time. Hope the stomach pains have gone for you though. Are you still bleeding?

coconuts yes, I don't think I'm 'healed' but my mindset is certainly more positive and it will be interesting to see if she's right about the next pregnancy going well. I've had so many people say 'this one's going to be fine I can feel it' and they've been wrong so it won't be any different for me should it happen again.

knitter I meant to respond to your 'secret' concern earlier. You should mention it at your rmc appointment and see if they will do a semen analysis to rule anything out. Just tell DH it's something they get every couple to do. Although I'm pretty sure that sperm quality only affects conception chances as opposed to miscarriage chances.

Did I mention my very strong positive opk I got this morning? And accompanying ovulation cramping and bloating? Am so so hoping this is it!

suffolksteph Tue 07-Jun-11 20:28:40

Evening ladies....

Not sure if anyone here can help but I've got myself in some bother...

I had my results appointment at St Marys today and one of my test (APA/APCR) which they are repeating today to confirm.... Mr Horner says that I can phone in four weeks for the results and if its positive then on the next BFP its Heprin and repeat of the TEG test... cant even remeber what he said about Asprin...

Only thing is..... I got my BFP tonight...... Now I feel stupid and I dont know what to do.... What will St Marys say? Will I have to go back next week...? Will my test today be screwed from the BFP...?

Sorry Ladies... Just not sure what to do now....

igggi Tue 07-Jun-11 21:50:58

Suffolk I had a similar position, just phone up first thing tomorrow and see what they advise - it might be to start the treatment until they get the results, I don't know. I was very embarrassed calling to say I'd got pg when I'd been told not to - the midwife didn't seem bothered at all, I think it must happen a lot! Good luck.

Digi your reiki experience sounds so interesting, it certainly won't have done any harm and what if she's right?! It reminded me to book some acupuncture for tomorrow to try to get a bit healthier.
Bleeding & pain stopped, let's hope that's it.

igggi Tue 07-Jun-11 22:19:08

Argh, posting about the acupunture reminded me to check what time it's for, and it's the same time as the massive grocery delivery I've ordered..

suffolksteph Wed 08-Jun-11 11:14:10

Thanks igggi I'm really sorry to read of your news.... Hope you hanging in there okay.... Although having been there myself its a pretty stupid thing to say... just know that my thoughts are with you...

Digi Healing can be lovley.. it doesnt harm anyone and if you can get something out of it go for it..... I'm trying Kinesiology later this month after a few people mentioned it and thought I would give it a go.... But I'd love to have some healing too....

I called St Marys this morning and the Nurse is outoff the office until the 20th June... and the other numbers are not manned today as its clinic day..... So I'm still a little in the dark... having really all obout Sticky blood the last couple of days I would say thats its me completly.... I really hope they give me the Heprin.... I started taking 75mg of Asprin today just encase....

digitalgirl Wed 08-Jun-11 15:25:52

Suffolk is it worth trying to get heparin from your gp? They should have a copy of your results from St Mary's so should be able to work out what dosage to give you. Good luck, really hope this one works out for you.

Thinking of you iloveblue will they give you the results of the blood test today?

Just popping in... my first appointment is tomorrow and I'm actually getting quite nervous - daft I know! I will mention my 'secret' concern - thanks for the response on that digi... Will let you know how it goes...

Hope everyone else is doing ok...

suffolksteph Wed 08-Jun-11 17:56:48

Evening Ladies... Finally got a call back from St Marys... They are not going to give me anything.. and cant even say about Asprin....

I really feel stupid for not waiting a few weeks.... And not sure if I should take 75mg of asprin any way...?

iloveblue Wed 08-Jun-11 21:10:41

Hi digi - thankyou for thinking of me
I got the first set of my HCG results (taken on Monday). They were 14000 ish. The nurse I spoke to said this is high and they would have expected to see more than just a possible gestational sac on the scan.
I think (from my limited googling research) that she was implying that they should have seen a yolk sac too, although she did say she has seen cases like this that have been fine.
I found this though which seems to say that the yolk sac can occur anytime between 5 +3 and 6 weeks. I think I was 5+5 when I had the scan.
Its just something else to worry about - its hard.

Congrats on BFP suffolksteph - I would be tempted to take the aspirin anyway if it was me. Could you mention it to your GP and see what they say?

digitalgirl Thu 09-Jun-11 08:27:56

iloveblue hcg does sound high - but at least your body is doing it's best to sustain this pregnancy. Fingers crossed the next scan shows a development.

Suffolk I've been prescribed Aspirin despite no clotting problems, so I would suggest you take it based on your results.

knitter good luck today!

I have just popped my first steroid tablet. Two very strong positive opk's yesterday and the day before. Lots of cramping and bloating feelings especially last night. Temp finally up today. Sex everyday since Sunday night so we have done everything we could. Wish me luck.

suffolksteph Thu 09-Jun-11 09:34:34

digi very best of luck......... x

luckyfor2 Thu 09-Jun-11 21:23:54

Hi girls - Been a bit of a mad week here!

Digi fantastic news about positive OPK yeah, I really hope the steroids go okay and everything works out this month for you.

Suffolk congrats on the BFP - sorry you're in this situation. I'm surprised that St Marys couldn't offer any more help than they have. I would also be tempted to take the aspirin. I take it without having anything come back for clotting.

ilove Hi sorry yes I should have explained, I've been on the 20 weeks thread a few times. I've got 2DC similar ages to yours and unfortunately been through the same hell! The news that your hcg has risen so highly is v.positive though. I guess the sac could be delayed in developing for various reasons and lots of peoples dates are slightly out due to implantation. When are they rescanning you?

knitter I hope your appointment has gone well today.

milky how are you - have you had this week's scan?

I've got abit of a silly thing to tell you...I was booked in for my nuchal scan today but on Tuesday I was browsing the internet wanting to see what a good nuchal scan should look like and comparing it to my last week scan pics. I was absolutely heartbroken because all the pics on the internet for downs looked just like my pic. I was convinced all was over, anyway, my husband rang the clinic and they put him through to the fetal medical consultant who saw us that afternoon (she was so nice) and told us that it was simply the membrane of the sac that I could see on the scan and she said that the normal scan pic could no way show what a nuchal scan shows. Anyway, the measurements all came within the right guidelines and hopefully when the bloods come back it wont be the horrible news that I was expecting! The consultant told us that everything looked good but obviously cannot tell us for sure until the bloods come back. It was horrible,I was crying in the consultants office when she told us what it was - she must have thought I was such an irrational idiot! So this week has been abit of a rollercoaster and it just shows what Dr Google can do. I felt like such a fool when I left.

Oh and DD1 asked me if I had a baby in my tummy yesterday which caught me by complete surprise. I've been trying so hard to keep it from them but my tummy gets very big so early on. I told her no and she seemed to accept it but she's such an observant little girl.

LAF77 Fri 10-Jun-11 08:25:47

Digi here's to hoping that this one is a keeper. Do you find with your cycles that you will know in 2 weeks or is it longer?

Steph if you have TEG, you need to be on a higher dose of aspirin. Lunatic had the same issue and 75mg won't be enough. However, St. Mary's seemed to be concerned about the APA more than TEG for you? When is your first scan appt with them? They will test for TEG during pg, but not APA.

When do you get your blood results lucky

iloveblue I'm sorry that you couldn't get a conclusive answer about your pg. It seems that they are rising which is good. Has the spotting stopped?

Caz where are you in the country? Do you have a local RMC clinic? Some clinics look at 3 in a row and others will look at overall mcs. You should talk to your GP and ask to be referred to an OB/GYN in your area. They can advise what your options are for specialist RMC.

knitter hope you have some comfort after your appt.

Thinking of you hairy kittens and iggi hope you are OK.

11 days to go until I get my results!

Havingkittens Fri 10-Jun-11 09:37:40

Hello, annoyingly I typed a long post yesterday and then when I tried to post it Mumsnet was doing their "Down for 5 minutes" thing and it disappeared. God, how I hate that! I must remember to copy my posts with a view to having to paste them back in when they get lost. This always seems to happen to me when I've written a particularly long one too!

So much going on here in the last couple of weeks, it's hard to keep up!

Great that you're finally ovulating Digitalgirl, what a relief! You've been putting in a stirling effort this month so fingers crossed for you. How are you getting on with the steroids?

iloveblue the rising hcg levels sound good. May they continue to rise! When's you're next scan/blood test?

hairy have you decided whether to have a scan yet or not? Leslie Regan seems to be in favour of having early and regular scans. Apparently there is something in it that can give the pregnancy a better chance. They can't explain it scientifically but they have said that in comparitive research that less women who have early and regular scans miscarry than those that don't. Possibly something to do with the hormones or endorphines released when seeing the baby. I'm not sure what I feel about that myself but if you have her book, it's under the TLC chapter.

In response to your other question about when to give up. I thought I would've given up a long time ago but I'm now trying for a 7th pregnancy. There just seems to be a compulsion that doesn't go away. For me, I think I won't give up until I have run out things to try. ie. having found out about my NK Cells I feel I should try and see if the treatment gives me a better chance. Like you, the consensus after my last loss was that I would only succeed with donor eggs and I haven't decided how I feel about that yet. When I was discussing it on the other thread I was on, in antenatal tests and choices, one of the girls on there had had donor eggs and advised me that I should have my NK Cell testing because if they were rejecting a pregnancy that was half my DNA then I wouldn't stand much chance with a pregnancy that was 100% foreign DNA without steroid treatment if I had an immune issue, so I'm glad I got tested. If the next one fails then maybe I will give up or maybe I will try donor eggs, not sure yet. There is also the added concern for me about having another trisomy, in which case I may also have to think about PGD. But I may stop before then. I wonder, when people do decide to stop trying, whether they reach a point of closure.

Milkyways great news about your scan. I understand how you feel about the pictures. I just stuffed mine in my bag and put it in a file when I got home. I don't have it anymore and didn't really look at it. BUT, hopefully, when all is fine along the way you will be pleased to have the pictures.

Caz I think you are in a position to ask to be referred to RMC. You may not have had 2 in a row but 4 out of 6 pregnancies ending in MC should be grounds enough. I'm sorry you're going through this again.

igggi how are you holding up? I'm sorry to hear your man stole your sympathy card. What is it with men, they often seem to manage that somehow! I hope your pain and bleeding have subsided and that he is now feeling better and making a suitable fuss over you.

Interesting reading about Digitalgirl's reiki and the conversation about skepticism, yet wanting to believe the good stuff. Reminded me of a similar feeling I have. A friend of mine's dad does numerology. When I lost my 5th pregnancy she said she wanted to get her dad to do my chart and asked for my full name and date and time of birth. She'd offered before and I'd said no, as I too am a skeptic, and also, if there is any truth in it, don't always think we should know what's supposed to be in store anyway. I was at a bit of a low ebb so I gave in that time. Anyway, she came back and told me that I would have a baby, but not for 2 years. I didn't really want to hear that at the time as I think I was waiting to test for my suspected 6th pregnancy and if that was right then it meant that pregnancy would also be doomed (which is was anyway). So, based on that timing, it would mean that if I got pregnant in the next few months the due date would be 2 years since that reading. So now it's planted a seed in my head, even though I am skeptical! Hmmm... we'll see!

suffolksteph Fri 10-Jun-11 10:12:29

Hey Ladies.. Sorry about the really self indulgent postings but I really just have a bag load of questions and nothing supportive to say.. other than I wish you all well and am following all your stories to try and keep up but I’m pretty new to all this…

I still haven’t had another call back from St Marys… When they called to tell me that they were not going to give me anything.. I asked about Aspirin and she said that she’s could say but would ask Mr Horner again and call me back (8th), She did make me an appointment at their EPU for the 22nd... so I waited…. But no call back so I phoned again and left a message the next day (9th) to say that I think I needed to change the EPU appointment as I would only be 5 weeks and I think they need me to be 6 weeks by then…. But I still haven’t heard anything…..

I feel like a right pest if I call again but I’m getting worried as it’s nearly the weekend and I’ll have to wait till Monday to do anything…

I cant go to my GP as they have washed their hands of me as I’ve now been referred and besides.. if St Marys are not going to give me anything my Local Hospital is hardly going to do anything …..My local Hospital is Rubbish with a capital R…

So I’m trying to remain calm and not over think things…. But It’s getting tricky.

I’m taking the 75mg of Aspirin but I’m not sure if I should up it to 150mg….

And now my test lines are getting weaker so I’m wondering if it’s just a Chemical PG… As I’m feeling no symptoms yet…(Sorry I’ve never had a Chemical before so I don’t know what to expect)

So sorry…Off to have a blub ..

Havingkittens Fri 10-Jun-11 10:44:06

Oh Steph, I can totally understand your anxiety. Don't worry about being a pest though. If it's the only way to get anywhere then so be it. Many people on here will tell you that it's the best way to make any progress.

Perhaps the lines are more feint because of timings of taking the tests, ie. more diluted, or maybe the test strips vary very slightly themselves. I've read of people getting very mixed results so early. Try not to panic yet, it's really early days. Symptoms often don't kick in until 6-8 weeks.

suffolksteph Fri 10-Jun-11 10:59:01

Thanks so much kittens some times I think I'm going bonkers.....

Mini Meltdown over though.....

They called.... Its doesnt help that I praticaly work in a cupboard and get no mobile reception.... She has changed the appointment for the 29th and advised 150mg of Aspirin....

Relieved is not the word....I could cry....

So I'm up for a relaxing few weeks.. I might step away from the four HPT I do each day and stick to the Superdrug ones that always give me a nice little line....

So sorry for the self indulgence again.....

Just reporting back from yesterday's appointment... All very basic and the next step is to have bloods taken on the 3rd day of my period and a scan mid-July... then they put all the results together and we've got a appointment on the 11th of August to go through them...

Strict instructions of no TTC until after the 11th of August - so I'm sort of hoping that we've not been successful this month... first time for everything I guess!

Hugs to everyone - seems like there has been some rollercoasters in the last few days sad

milkyways Fri 10-Jun-11 17:13:45

Lucky I am really glad your scan went well. I would have been the same.

I'm currently guilty of googling like a crazy woman. Last week I spent all my time looking at what a 9 week scan should look like and this week i've been looking at 10 week scans.
I had a bad dream on tuesday about miscarrying, and since then i've been trying to feel my uterus but can't feel any bump or bulge so i'm not too optomistic about this pregnancy. I don't think I'm going to the loo very often either so my uterus can't be growing much. I have too many anxieties. I really don't want a fifth mc. I have my next scan on monday and I know I will have fallen apart by sunday.

Sorry for the self indulgent post but I really needed to get some of that off my chest. I hope everyone else is okay and as well as can be.

luckyfor2 Fri 10-Jun-11 17:34:40

Steph so glad they finally got back to you with something constructive. Don't ever feel like a pest - you are their patient and it is their job to look after you, that is their only job so you and all their patients are their priority. Please if you need to know anything just ring and pester them at least then they know you're not going to go away and will always try and get back to you. Anyway rant over! Hope like you say that you can have a few weeks of rest now.

knitter glad your appointment went well I guess its just waiting now but at least you've got the motion going and have some dates to look ahead to.

kittens So annoying when that happens - its happenned to me before and just drives me mad - that or my computer decides to crash when I try and post. Lets hope your friends dad is right and that this next one when it happens is going to stick. I had a dream last year about me and one of my friends, at the time I was pregnant so it was abit strange but I dreamt that me and my friend who wasn't pregnant was walking around together both pregnant but she was bigger than me, anyway, she is now around 20 weeks so it seems my dream has come true. Very real it was and I was completely oblivious to mcs at the time having had none at that point.

milky I have only just started to feel a slight bump when I lay down very low down (I'm massive when I stand up ) and I know last time when I asked my GP why I couldn't feel anything she said that there is no way you can until at least 13 weeks so don't worry about that. I also don't wee very often and only have at the very beginning of pregnancies. Really try not to worry about these things (says me who has had a complete melt down this week) but really they are nothing to worry about at this point. Big hugs to your feeling like this though x Also, I'm guilty at looking at weekly scan pics to see what everything should look like the week after! (wouldn't have dreamt of doing that with my 2DD.

Big hugs to igggi hope you're doing okay and the bleeding has reduced/stopped. Silly husbands always get in the way don't they, you should have the most attention possible after the hell you've been through. x

waves to coconuts, LAF and Hairy and anyone else I've missed.

milkyways Sat 11-Jun-11 17:20:19

Thanks for the reassurance lucky. I'm a bit more relaxed today, I passed my exams - I have no idea how - but it will keep my mind off the scan for the next day I hope!

digitalgirl Sun 12-Jun-11 12:21:36

Hope you're ok this weekend steph

iloveblue did you get your repeat hcg results?

LAF not long to go now! Will you start ttc again after this appointment?

Got my letter for my St Mary's appointment yesterday - which was 3 months to the date if my erpc and coincidentally my due date for my third miscarried pregnancy.
Its on the 28th by which point I'll have got my period if I'm not pg. I think I'll go to it if I'm not pg, even though I'm seeing Mr S it'll just be another opportunity to have the tests done. I just have to tell them by the 23rd so will be testing early. Will mention to them I'm already on aspirin and steroids. Maybe if I get pg I can have my scans there instead of my local epu. Don't think I could stand going back to the same room and being seen by the same nurse and having to endure that same overlong silence that you get when something's wrong.

LAF77 Sun 12-Jun-11 20:22:11

Hi digi if I get the go ahead to TTC, I should be in prime position to TTC right away. My period is due at the end of this week, so I should be good to go. We'll see if I'm still "superfertile" and can fall straight away on this cycle. DH is likely to start working away from home, so it would be easier this way. A lot of "ifs" and interdependencies.

I'm not sure how daily aspirin would affect your clotting tests. There's no harm in confirming the appt and cancelling it after.

Hopefully, we can go through happy successful pgs together.

iloveblue Sun 12-Jun-11 21:58:52

Thankyou for all the supportive messages everyone

Yes digi, I did get my 2nd lot of HCG results and they had only gone up by 300ish. The nurse at the EPU consulted the doctor and I was told I had to get to hospital asap as they suspected an ectopic and I may need surgery. This was all based on the fact that they had only seen a sac on Monday (the body can get confused and produce one anyway apparently), they had seen free fluid on the scan (could be blood from tube) and my HCG levels weren't doing what they should.
I spent Thursday night on the gynae ward - I was absolutely fine, no pain/bleeding. Had a scan on Friday morning which showed a gestational sac and a yolk sac - so ectopic ruled out, thankfully. Although the pregnancy had progressed since Monday the sonographer said it didn't look right and wasn't too hopeful.
I've got another scan on Friday so in the mean time its just wait and see.

Its been such a rollercoaster already - I just don't know if I could do this again.

lucky glad all is looking good still. x

Got my fingers crossed digi that you get a lucky BFP this month.x

Glad you're feeling more relaxed steph x

digitalgirl Mon 13-Jun-11 10:13:16

iloveblue sorry it's all still so up in the air. Small mercy that it's not ectopic.

I just received my karyotyping results from my last miscarriage. sad
She was a girl. And she had triploidy - three extra sets of chromosomes plus an extra set of x chromosomes (the sex chromosome) present. I quickly looked this up in Lesley Regan's book and it says that sometimes this is caused by more than one sperm fertilising the egg.

The report then goes on to say that recurrence of this is low but prenatal diagnosis may be appropriate for future pregnancies. Does this mean genetic counselling? The book says that triploidys are nothing to do with maternal age - so I'm guessing it's not an egg quality issue. Just bad luck.

Really not sure how I'm supposed to feel about this. Relieved that my body did the right thing rejecting a baby with problems so early? The book says that these babies can never survive to full term. Upset that this happened on my fourth miscarriage - what about the previous losses were they all down to bad genetics too - possibly not if recurrence is low? Confused that I'm now on steroids, what if I prevent my body from rejecting another baby with problems?

Feels like a lot to take in. sad

Havingkittens Mon 13-Jun-11 10:58:36

Digital I'm just heading out of the door so will have to be brief, but didn't want you going unanswered. I'd say that if it tends to be caused by two sperms fertilising one egg then it's unlikely to happen more than once. I also think that regardless of the steroids suppressing any immune reaction to a pregnancy, I suspect that if there are chromosomal issues with a pregnancy that would normally be miscarried this would probably still be the case. After all, those without high NK Cells still miscarry in most of these cases.

Why don't you start a thread on the Antenatal Tests and Choices board? There will be various people who have experience of Triploidy who can share what they know with you about chances of recurrence.

luckyfor2 Mon 13-Jun-11 14:09:09

Ilove I'm sorry you've had to go through so much over the last week, relief that it isn't ectopic but you must be going through a tough time with all the waiting. Thinking of you.x

Digi I think it is so hard to find out the results at a time when you're just starting to move and it is such a lot to take in even though it is something we all want to know. Unfortunately it sounds like it was very bad luck last time and even though you're going to feel extremely anxious in your next pregnancy its so unlikely the same will happen again especially as you and DH genetics have all come back normal. Good idea about starting a thread kittens

I've just had the results of the nuchal and they are 1:31031 which is very low, still feel like there is no way I can relax as last time I got 1:50000 and I still mc. One step at a time though and I am really very pleased at the result.

Have you had your scan milky I really hope everything is okay. x

freelancegirl Mon 13-Jun-11 17:10:53

Hello ladies, it’s been a while since I dropped in here as I haven’t had anything exciting to add. Hope veryone is well. Hello Blue, will PM you as soon as I get my head in gear. Hi again Digi, gosh your Reiki experience sounds amazing. Even just to make you feel relaxed and positive about the future. How exciting that you have taken your first steroids! Any side effects so far?

Caz, as the rest of them say you should definiltey be able to have investigations. So sorry for what you have been through. You are doing the right thing by posting on here as unfortunately most of us have found we need to take charge ourselves as often testing and treatment is not mentioned at hospitals and via your GP. Finding out how to see is something you might have to do yourself and then beg and plead for investigations via your GP and referrals. My GP has been reall y receptive to anything I have asked her (or told her to do for me in some cases!) but if it were down to her I wouldn’t have had anything done.

Igggi – I can’t keep up with all the threads but have you had another mc? If so, am so, so sorry to hear that.

Kittens how is your treatment going? Are you on steroids yet? I have created a thread on Conception about TTC on Prednisoline so please do anyone of you contribute, I would to know evereone elses experience.

Lucky good news about the scan. It must be hard to keep positive but that is really a very positive sign.

Oh yes, I guess I should say why I am back here and posting now. I have just had my results at an appointment with Mr S and it turns out I have very high NK cells. In the top 5% of people they see at the clinic. It was a bit upsetting actually to find out they are so high, but I guess it is good to have a diagnosis and treatment plan in place to start ttc in a week or so. I just don’t know whether having such high levels actually rules me out of the game…? My result was 3.69 total NK CD69 count and apparently anything over 1.8 is already considered very high. Plan is Pred for two weeks from ovulation and continuing if (when?) pregnant at a dosage of 40mcg. Then also Cyclogest pessaries and Intralipids.

Digi I just got down to your most recent post, about having had the results back. How distressing that must be. And confusing. Who know whether this was anything to do with the previous ones? I think that like Kittens says there is always the possibility of people with normal NK cells miscarrying and it might just be an awful coincidence.

Have to say I feel pretty low about my super dooper high NK cells now. I know Mr S has an 85% success rate but he did seem really surprised at my very high levels. He did say that he has seen people have babies at this level before but he couldn’t say what the chances are. He did say that without treatment I would be very unlikely to be able to carry a baby to term.

LAF77 Mon 13-Jun-11 21:16:51

Hi freelance to put your mind at ease maybe a little bit, I saw a lady that I hadn't seen for some time last week. We had talked about pg problems. She had IVF and struggled to get pg. She was 20 weeks with twins. I asked her about her treatment. She had extremely high NKC. Like 5.0 or something. She had to have steroids, IVIG, and other medication. She went to the the ARGC on Wimpole street for her treatment privately. It has cost her a lot of money, but she is so happy to be where she's at. They had to give her something to try and have the NKC attack that instead of the pg. Don't despair, it can be possible.

Digi so sorry to hear about your results. Heartbreaking. It seems that it is unlikely to happen again. I remember the anecdote in LR's book where she dealt with a patient that had many different chromosomal abnormalities and wondered which one was next. She did get there in the end. Cold comfort, I know. I think it is better to have an answer about why it happened then no explanation. As you have a DS, it seems hard to believe that you would need genetic counselling, but what do I know?

how are you today iloveblue

Thinking of you suffolk kittens milky hairy and iggi lucky and some of our other friends who have been absent for a long time like clare brook panda and everyone. I'm off to Ascot tomorrow, I'm not sure with my luck if I should bet or not....

aMuminwaiting Tue 14-Jun-11 15:52:01

Hi everyone. I'm waiting for my husband and I to have karyotyping tests. I had all the blood clotting tests, lupus, thyroid etc and everything came back fine. I lost my first at nearly 22 weeks, then my second at 11 weeks and my last was 7 weeks.

They tested the placenta from my first pregnancy but not the baby and threw away my baby from the second pregnancy when I thought they were doing tests. The third they sent off to Guys and I'm awaiting the results. I was put on aspirin and progesterone pesseries in the last pregnancy and started bleeding after they did an internal scan at 6 weeks.

Everything seems so slow! No one seems to understand that my husband and I are desperate for answers. I know we might not get them but to feel like something was being done to try would be great.

Has anyone had anything useful come of the karyotyping or testing on the baby?

digitalgirl Tue 14-Jun-11 19:22:36

faintpositive congrats on the faint positive! When I got a bfp after three mc's they asked me to come in for a scan around 6 weeks and said if I wanted to I could take low dose aspirin. I went in at 5.5 and all measured well but as it was too early to detect a heartbeat they offered me another scan a week later. I had the option of weekly scans up till 12 weeks. Unfortunately I didn't make it past 8 weeks. I had an erpc where they sent the baby for karyotyping. I made sure I reminded the surgeon about the karyotyping so it wouldn't get forgotten.
This was 3 months ago, I got my results back yesterday and it turns out my baby had triploidy - three sets of chromosomes instead of two. So although I tested for high nk cells that baby (a girl) would never have made it to full term.
It's reassuring to know that there was definitely a problem that couldn't have been helped no matter what medication I'd been on. It doesn't answer why my previous three pregnancies failed - perhaps the nk cells were at work - but I know that it would be extremely unlikely that it would have been the same issue.

I remain optimistic that I will have another child. I suppose yesterdays results, although very sad, have helped me remain so.

digitalgirl Tue 14-Jun-11 19:23:09

Oops wrong thread. Sorry.

digitalgirl Tue 14-Jun-11 19:46:45

Right I see what I've done. I've responded to aMuminwaiting but confused you with a poster from another thread. Huge apologies I'm so sorry. I blame the new mn iPhone app. blush

aMum I'm very sorry for your losses. I'm surprised they didn't test the baby from your first pregnancy when it was such a late loss. As I've written above I only managed to have my fourth mc karyotyped - as my previous three were natural miscarriages. And I think they would have only tested the third one anyway. The testing was done at Gt Ormond St and it took me three months to get the results (I was told 10 weeks) - it took a similar amount of time to get my own and dh's karyotyping results back too.
The wait could have been interminable but I'd decided in the meantime to go privately to get further tests that my hospital dont do. It helped me feel a bit more in control of the situation which helped. Now I'm on a treatment plan I do feel so much more in control.

iloveblue Tue 14-Jun-11 20:36:10

Hi everyone

That must have been hard to get that news digi but like you say reassuring to know that there was something seriously wrong and the baby would never had made it.

Hope you had a lovely time at Ascot LAF.

I'm so sorry to hear of your losses amuminwaiting. I too am surprised they didn't do any tests on your first baby. I had a late loss in October last year (at 20 wks) and we had a full post mortem on the baby - they didn't find anything but did rule out lots of things. I also went on to have an early mc in Feb and may/may not be losing this pregnancy (I'm 6/7 wks).
I can understand your frustration - these processes can be so drawn out at times. I hope you get some answers too.

I'm still feeling pregnant - although I'm aware that doesn't necessarily mean its not going to fail.
I had no pregnancy symptoms at all with my last mc at 7/8 weeks.
I'm feeling more positive - and even if this does go pear-shaped, I know we'll get the testing done and am actually looking forward to 3-6 months of not being pregnant or TTC.

Hope everyone else is ok x

milkyways Tue 14-Jun-11 22:14:49

digital I hope you are ok after receiving the results. I remember being stunned when I saw 'female karyotype' written on the results paper. It just made my baby so much more real and finally acknowledged iykwim.
From past knowledge I remember that triploidy can be quite common and happen to anyone, but like you said, a recurrence would be very rare. By 'prenatal diagnosis' I would suspect the report meant cvs and amniocentisis. I agree with the others in that it was a one off and unlikely it would happen again.

Lucky great news on the nt scan! I know how hard it is to relax though.

amum I'm sorry for your losses and understand how frustrating it can be waiting for results. With my fourth mc, I had to ask for my baby to be tested. I waited around 10 weeks for the results. The reason why it takes so long is because the tissue from the baby is such a minute amount they have to grow cells for a few weeks to be able to conduct genetic tests. Knowing this made the wait a bit more bearable for me as I knew something was being done.

I had my scan on monday, and baby still has a hb and looked bigger. I am worried about my mental health though as after every mc, I began focussing on the next pregnancy instead of giving myself time. I'm scared that somewhere through this hell i've stopped wanting a baby and its become more of a point of proving to myself my body still works. I am so so scared that i'll have pnd or something if I end up giving birth. With these bad thoughts i've booked an appointment with my gp and will ask for counselling. I don't feel happy about anything and even if this pregnancy fails i'll have a clear head at least with the counselling.

Hope everyone else is doing ok

pureequeen Wed 15-Jun-11 09:07:39

hi everyone, sounds like it's been a busy time on the RMC board. digi and milky I totally agree that seeing the "female karotype" on paper made it so much worse - in my case (don't know if you got this) they sent me an A4 size picture of all her chromosome pairs! It was like biology at school all over again.

i saw Mr S last Wednesday and had buckets of blood taken. Get the results in three weeks. I was eyeing up all the women in the clinic trying to identify any MN posters from this board!!! freelance I think you're in safe hands with Mr S. I asked him when would we say enough was enough and he said he had successfully treated one woman who had had 27 (I think that was the number - it was in the 20s) miscarriages. So he wasn't at all moved by my 5 m/c (but in a nice and supportive way if you see what I mean).

Good luck to everyone waiting for their next scans. Fingers crossed.

suffolksteph Wed 15-Jun-11 10:28:44

Hey Ladies

I just popped on to see how Igggi was doing.. I've been thinking of you....

Digi Sorry to hear about the results... sadly on the last two that I had the Karyotyping on were "failed to grow" so we got no answers on either of them... I only chose a MM and an ERPC becuase I knew they could be sent away for testing.... also when we got the results back for the 3rd MC (1st tested) we were told that everything was normal.... of course "failed to grow" is inconclusive so not normal at all.... I was fuming when i found out when we got the results from the 4MC (2nd tested).. and now I always get my results in paper sent to me and demand to see them in black and white.... At the time after the 3rd MC I wasnt really with it and trusted my local Hopsital that what they were doing and what they told me was true... I now know that they dont know what they are doing and I no longer trust them..... Mine were sent to Addenbrooks and took about 6 weeks.... My hospital is really Rubbish as when i went for my appointment for my results on the 4th MC (2nd tested)the consultant had no idea what I was doing there...... It was a complete mess... I was a complete mess...

Milky What you are feeling is completly normal.... after my 4th MC I am now having weekly councelling but it took me a while to get the help.... I got to point where I couldnt even speak properly, my brain just wansnt letting me function.... Work sent me home and After being signed off for 2 and a half months I'm back.... I still go to the councelling and its really helping... I felt like a turned a corner about a month ago... but the best thing is not to push yourself.... be honest with how your feeling... What youve been through is awful and you have a right to feel the way you do.... You just need some help to work yourself through your feelings so you dont turn them on yourself....

As for me....... I'm on my 3rd PG in 8 months and I'm trying to take one day at a time.... I forgot this feeling of a day seems like a week.... I just want time to hurry up... This will be my 6th PG in total (I have a 14 year old son and had 4 MC).. I have no idea what to feel at the moment... I'm just trying to remain calm and relaxed.... but its getting tougher.... I'm only just over 4 weeks but I'm yet to have any real sysmtoms... My boobs did feel like they were burning yesday but so far I've had nothing else.. no nausea or Peeing (I was in our London office on Monday and I didnt have a wee from 8am until 5pm, thats really bad I know but quiet normal for me) Hubby keeps saying things about the baby.. but in my mind its not a baby yet.... I dont think I will be able to imagine it as a baby for some time.... maybe only until I am h