Is this a hormone crash?

[StarflowerGirl]

I'm going through my second miscarriage in four months having lost this baby at 6w+3.

I've been coping ok emotionally for the past couple of days as I was focussing on getting through the pain and the hospital visits but today I seem to be having some sort of hormone crash.

My temper has been on a hair trigger all day and all sorts of silly little things are setting it off. The dog has taken to hiding in the kitchen as he's had enough of me shouting at him. I can't sit still but when I get up to do something I lose interest. I'm exhausted but I don't want to go to sleep.

DH keeps asking me what's wrong but I can't seem to put into words why I feel this way. It's like I have PMSx1000.

Is this normal? I don't remember feeling like this last time. I lost that baby at just under 5 weeks so perhaps there weren't as many hormones floating around my system?

[knackered76]

Hi Starflower,

I'm so sorry for your loss :(. I had a mmc, discovered at 10 wks stopped at 8, in July and thought I was coping really rather well, that was until a week later when I had a total melt down over something so small. I curled up in bed and cried for about 6 hours with DH gently saying 'I think this will be those hormones'! I was then fine for a while until I got my first period and then that sent me off again! Give yourself time, it could because there are more hormones but also because this is your second time and you are devastated. You are completely normal and don't worry about trying to put into words how you feel, you won't be able to as only those who have been through it truly know how you feel.

Take care of yourself and give yourself time. Cry when you need to and shout at the dog when you need to. You will start to feel better but don't rush yourself into it.

[ljg72]

Hello Starflower firstly I am so sorry you are experiencing this...

I also have had two mc in the last four months, so kind of know how you may be feeling...and can totally relate to all of what you are saying, especially not being able to sit still, but not actually really wanting to do anything!.

One mc is terrible but when the second one happens I think you experience alot more anger, and personally I have become really angry and feel very let down by my body, if that makes sense?.

I think everything you are feeling is totally normal and part of the grief process...and you need to allow yourself to go with it and just give yourself time to work through all those feelings.

I am awaiting my af since my second mc, and the pms is shocking! never usually bad at all, but I'm guessing that is also due to mc.

Hope somebody is at home to look after you...sending you huge (((hugs))) x

[StarflowerGirl]

knackered I'm very sorry for your loss. Like you I thought I was coping well with it all so it has taken me by surprise that I feel this way.

ljg I am very sorry for both of your losses. I think you're right in that a lot of the anger and frustration I'm feeling is directed at my own body for being so useless.

Thank you both so much for taking the time to reply to my question. It helps a great deal to know that what I'm feeling is perfectly normal. DH has a better understanding of it all now too. I am a little better this morning; not 100% by any stretch of the imagination but I'm getting there.

[emptyshell]

Yep I believe it's (shit but) normal.

Me and hubby have been at each other's throats over ridiculous things - I've been tearful beyond belief and there have been a number of times when I've just ended up sobbing about the most irrational thing (like there's no CHEEESE WAAAAAAHHHH! stupidity). I guess you've got this mega reverse PMS thing that MUST happen really when all those nice irrational woman hormones have to go back to "normal" so I've put it down to a lot of that, coupled with the massive massive rage of this being the second one we've gone through in 4 months.

Incidentally it's hit my usually very placid and calm husband probably harder than it hit me really - he's really really on a short fuse and there have been a fair few times when he's broken down and sobbed - and that's not like mister "I never talk about my feelings"

Oh and the poor cat's been shouted at more times than enough.

[StarflowerGirl]

emptyshell Thank you for taking the time to reply to my message. I am so sorry to hear that you've been through this too.

Your username describes perfectly the way I feel at the moment. Like an empty shell. A big void of awful despairing emptiness. It felt like too much to bear on Sunday but it isn't so all encompassing today. I'm just going to try and take each day and each surge of emotion as it comes.

[LadyGoneGaga]

So sorry to hear of your loss Star. I lost mine at 7 weeks and I had some real flashes of rage extending to shouting obscenities at a man in the hospital carpark after we had our scan. I spoke to my GP and she said the hormone levels go from being really high to crashing. It's exhausting and you feel shit anyway because of the sadness.

Ljg is interesting you mentioned the pmt. I've just got my first AF and again utter rage hit me. I'm charting and temps seem all over the place which suggests hormones still fluctuating wildly 6 weeks on.

I hope we all get there soon x

[StarflowerGirl]

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss too Lady.

I completely understand the fits of rage and shouting.

When we walked into the EPU reception prior to our scan we were faced with a waiting room full of heavily pregnant women. We hadn't been warned beforehand that the EPU shared its waiting room with the OBGYN clinic. To add insult to injury after we'd had our scan we had to sit in that waiting room for over an hour waiting to see a Dr and knowing that we'd lost our baby, while scores of other happy couples came past clutching photos of their successful scans. I just wanted to scream the place down.