Well CSA have got their fingers out their backsides and finally processed my claim......

[FAQ]

I sent the form off in July - and they finally got round to doing anything about it about 4 weeks ago, exH filled in the form about 2 weeks ago, they rang me on Saturday just gone to make sure I wanted to go ahead with it as it was and whether I wanted him to pay me directly or to get payment via the CSA. I opted for the former (as agreed with exH).

The letter came today with the calculation in - saying he should be paying me £49.71 a week from today!!! (I asked for payment once a month ). I don't want weekly payment, he can't do weekly payments so I have x52 and /12 to get the monthly figure......

So do you think

a) he will actually pay me the money

or

b) make excuses as to why he can't pay it and force me to ask the CSA to collect???

(oh and on the letter is says Mr FAQ has agreed to pay that amount each week)

What d'ya reckon

oh and I know that with the new changes that when I tell IS I'm getting this amount (haha) they will reduce my IS - will that be by the amount above what I was entitled to keep under the old rules?

[captainofthemummies]

Why is everything so bloody hard?

I've no idea FAQ. I'd have thought it would be better from Mr FAQ to pay the csa rather than you direct, then they can see if he is actually paying up or not(and do nothing about it!)

[Dropdeadfred]

i think you can keep £5 a week of that, IS will reduce by the rest

[hecAteTheirBrains]

So what happens if he doesn't pay, but your benefit is reduced by the amount he is supposed to pay and they won't give you any more because he is supposed to pay it, even though he isn't, erm, if he doesn't if you get me.

I'm not sure I get me!

[FAQ]

lol I know what you mean hecate.....

I'm not sure what to do tbh, if I change my mind and go through the CSA (ie get them to pay him and then they give me the money) he's not going to be happy - and as we've got an "amicable" relationship at the moment I don't want to scupper that - especially as he's said he'll give me 50% of any money we make when the house is sold (it's all in his name, deeds and mortgage) without me having to go down a legal route to get my cut........if I start getting awkward using the CSA to get the payments off him then I can see him getting funny on the house thing - and then I could lose out big time (while we may not make much on the house at all once all costs are taken into account I could still end up with enough to pay off my small amounts of debt - which will make a big difference to my regular monthly outgoings........)

The new CSA changes say that

Q. When will I be able to keep more of the money paid as child maintenance?

A. On 27 October 2008, all parents with care claiming income-related benefits (Income Support and income based Jobseeker's Allowance) will be able to keep the first £20 per week of their maintenance where it is being paid. At the same time, all child maintenance payments will be disregarded when calculating Housing Benefit and Council Tax Benefit.

From April 2010 a full benefit disregard will be introduced.

[Dropdeadfred]

why doesn't he want the csa involved?

[FAQ]

he doesn't mind the CSA being involved per se (he had the forms they sent him to fill in back to them just 3 days after getting them in the post), but he'd rather make direct payments to me rather than them taking them whenever they feel like it.

He's up to his eyes in debt (much of it taken on while we were still together) , has a variable monthly income and I know that if they just took the payments when they decide to take the payments it's going to screw him even more - which will probably lead him to not have the DS's so often. I want him to see the DS's more than I want his money.

Up until last month he was paying for most of the mortgage on this house and before he even moved out I said I was happy for this to be his "maintenance" (was much more than they're asking him for) - I only got the CSA involved because they reduced my IS as I had "refused" (ermm no I didn't......but that's another thread) to apply for maintenance.

However the monthly mortgage payment has now stopped (because of finances) - hence the house now being on the market, trying to sell before the bank repossesses. I'm not sure if he can afford the figure they've given each month, he's said he will pay, but that if it's more than he's actually got left each month then it will affect contact with the boys.......and he's seen/had them reguarly since he moved out in March

We've only recently got the the stage where we're amicable enough again to be able to maintain a decent relationship in front of the DS's when he drops them off and picks them up, if I start doing the opposite to what we agreed 6 months ago I'm worried this is going to scupper it.........he's kept to the agreements we made before he moved out - so really feel I should too

(god that's long and waffly and probably doesn't make much sense - but I know what i mean)

[Dropdeadfred]

the csa take payments monthly though...on the same date every month
you run a very real risk of your IS being reduced and your ex saying he cannot afford to pay you....I do understand your wish for an amicable relationship but if you are the main carer money is important too unfortunately

[FAQ]

I know but at the same time if I go through the CSA, tell IS that I'm getting "x" amount each month - they reduce my IS and then the money isn't in exH's account when the CSA try and take it (so therefore I don't get anything) I'll be in the same situation

[FAQ]

The silly thing is I've been managing fine on the money I have (and I don't currently qualify for housing benefits - will do once I've moved out of here early next year), and he's seeing/having the boys reguarly (which is my main concern) so for me the money is just an added "bonus" - I can live without the maintenace - and my DS's aren't going short because of not currently getting any.

And YES I know he "should be paying" for his children it's just my personal feelings that regular contact with his children is of more importance than money - especially when I'm getting by just fine without the money.

[Dropdeadfred]

is he self-employed?

[FAQ]

no he's not - but he has a basic salary and most of his income is made up from commission/bonuses.

[Dropdeadfred]

the CSA can take it straight from his salary via his employers

[Majeika]

why not put the money into an account for the children and keep going as you are?

Hecate is right - if he doesnt pay but IS think he is paying then you are screwed!

[FAQ]

I know - but I'm not sure if I could deal with the "fallout" when he doesn't have enough money after being paid to pay his bills

[Lurcio]

I think in your position that I would give him the chance to pay directly to you. In my head, I would set an ammount of time (3months?) and if he hasn't made regular payments during that time, then I would be tempted to call in the CSA.