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Lone parents

What's GOOD about being a single parent?

69 replies

Janos · 15/12/2007 19:34

OK, It's really hard work, no mnatter how mych you love your LOs. Sometimes....actually no, A LOT of the time it can be a real struggle. Not much money. Little or no support. Prejudice and judgemental attitudes.

BUT BUT BUT.

Despite all of that, I am SO much happier as a single mum.

And here is why.

  • No selfish, bullying, controlling XP casting a shadow over me and making my life miserable.

  • I have my own place. OK, it's not luxurious but it's warm, cosy (reasonably clean and it's MINE.

  • What I say goes in my own home.

  • No-one to think about but my and my DS.

  • The pride of knowing I can and do manage on my own.

    All of these things make me glad to be a single mum. And actually I think everyone who is should bloody well be proud of themselves!
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ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 15/12/2007 19:36

Good post janos.
Totally agree with you.
I ahve been a single Mum of 4 for 2 years now.

I do miss loving hugs though.

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PersonalChristmasElf · 15/12/2007 19:44

It's the little things for me.
Such as:
sleeping in the middle of the bed cocooned in the duvet
no one moaning about what I eat/watch/listen to
being able to spend all day in my jamas if I so wish.
Things like that!

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charliecat · 15/12/2007 19:46

The atmosphere is so much better now im on my own...so so so much better...

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Janos · 15/12/2007 19:51

That's exactly what I mean charliecat...not having to walk round on eggshells all the bloody time.

Not having to fend off the verbal salvos my XP used to fling at me.

Not always having the telly blaring away in the background...

I do miss the loving stuff too though. But not enought o settle for just anyone.

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charliecat · 15/12/2007 19:53
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Janos · 15/12/2007 19:57
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charliecat · 15/12/2007 20:05
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Janos · 15/12/2007 20:15
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charliecat · 15/12/2007 20:18

I also feel less stressed at the housework as theres not a fully capable lazt twunt sitting on the sofa lifting his legs so I can hoover under them...

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Janos · 15/12/2007 20:48

Mmmmm, I've never been the tidiest or most oraganised person in the world but life without XP is so much CLEANER.

An example - he used to leave used filthy wank socks lying round.

Can you imagine anything more revolting?

Actually, you probably can!

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Skribble · 15/12/2007 20:55

I tidy up when I need to and don't feel resentful cos its all my mess (and the kids).

I look at my kids and feel so proud that they are all down to me.

I only have to put up with exH and his bloody phone that seems to be surgically attached to him occasionaly. SORRY this should be a positive thread.

When the kids open their presents this year I don't have to pretend they are from anyone apart from me, well I suppose the man with the big beard can take some credit .

I get to choose which crap christmas films I want to watch, (once the kids are in bed).

I get to drink a full bottle of wine to myself. Ok thats not good all the time.

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Skribble · 15/12/2007 20:57

OH big bonus!!!!!

I got my electricity bill today and it is HALF yes half what it was when he was here.
Must be less showers and less clothes to wash.

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charliecat · 15/12/2007 21:14

not living with any of these guys

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HabbiChristmasToBu · 15/12/2007 21:17

Am not a single parent, but on my own with 14 month old for 4 whole days (!) just now and wanted to say that I think you lone parents are really amazing and frankly, I take my hat off to you. I, on the other hand, am a hopeless sap...

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chickenmama · 15/12/2007 22:13

So glad to see others enjoy being a single parent too

My dds father left the country when she was 5 months old, I've had this past year totally stress-free and I LOVE it!

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Krimble · 15/12/2007 22:15

Twice as much wardrobe and drawer space in the bedroom.

Sitting in bed eating mini chedders, drinking red wine watching crap tv with noone to pass comment.

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kama · 15/12/2007 22:16

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Krimble · 15/12/2007 22:19

I didn't choose to be single, but I like it now I have realised it is a much better life for me and probably the kids, although they don't see many differences.

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Janos · 15/12/2007 22:50

Yeah, I think a lot of people don't choose to be in that position Krimble.

I'd say most people who are in a committed relationship and have a child don't really imagine being single parents...I certainly didn't, although in the end it was my decision to end the relationship (very long story there).

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1066andallthat · 16/12/2007 17:04

No one sapping all your positive energy.

Getting your confidence back.

Putting up the Christmas decorations early i.e. before Christmas Eve.

The lack of day-to-day resentment of another adult not doing their share.

The tickles, the cuddles, the brilliant moments.

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Krimble · 16/12/2007 21:38

I am starting to enjoy less resentment and savouring the lazy mornings and cozy afternoons with the kids rather than getting angry because he can't be arsed getting up early to spend more time with them.

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kama · 17/12/2007 23:01

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Krimble · 17/12/2007 23:03

Ach yer fine sweety . I should have made the choice myself but nevermind .

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33kjs · 17/12/2007 23:10

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PurpleOne · 17/12/2007 23:26

There's no words to define a single mum IMVHO...I love all aspects of it.

The remote is mine
My double bed is mine.
The computer is mine

I can do what I want, when I want, how I want and where I want (within reason LOL)

If I want to drunk dance at 4.30am then I will. If I want to slob in bed on Saturday morning, I'll do that too! Hell, and the DD's make a wicked cup of coffee and cooked brekkie too!

I can hide the box of chocs I bought myself..and when I go back to it, IT'S STILL THERE
I buy my own flowers. Don't need a man for that one

Got 2 great DC's for hugs and cosy nights on the sofa with a dvd, popcorn, fleece blankets and candles.

Ann Summers sell a great range of vibrators...what more can a girl need / want???

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