New here and really needing some adivce

[MissEm]

I have been a lp since the day I found out I was pg with my dd (nearly 9).I have always found everything fairly easy and she has never known any different and I thought that it didn't bother her. Well today she is asking me all sorts about why she doesn't see her dad, does he love her etc etc, I don't know what has brought it on and I feel daft that I have not prepared myself for this.

The truth is he doesn't want to see her (I have asked, what do I say to her? Some advice from someone who has been there.

[mckenzie]

hi MissEm, I have no advice to give unfortunately but didn't want your message to go unnoticed. I'm sure someone will come on soon and give you some helpful advice.

[BurpyErnie]

Hello MissEm

I'm in a similar situation with my step kids whos mother wants very little to do with them, alough she does see them when she feels like it. For the vast majority of the time they seem alright, but we have had the occasional Mum doesn't love me etc. this was perticular bad with the oldest but as he grew up things improved.

The only thing you can do yourself is be there for your child and try hard not to critisise the absent parent (not easy I know)

Has she ever had contact with her dad?

[Tinkerbeltinsel]

tell her the truth, you dont have to tell her all the gorey details just sugar coat it, dont make excuses for your ex either as she will find out herself when she is older anyway especially if she tracks him down later in life.

[MissEm]

Thanks,I do try and brush her questions under the carpet (wrong I know). I have never said anything bad about him (not to her anyway). He saw her once when she was 6 weeks, he has refused to see her since.