Abandoned by OH while pregnant..heartbroken

(23 Posts)
Nomorecakey Sat 19-Nov-16 19:25:39

I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant with my new partner. I have children from a previous relationship. <br />
My partner has very recently and without any warning walked out. We were fine. He was getting in contact with me all day and everything was ok. Telling me he really loved me and he was looking forward to the baby. Just the normal thing for us!.That was it...nothing since. He wont answer my calls or txts.
I have found out through someone else that he is ok but that's all I know. I'm heartbroken and so lost. Not knowing is killing me. I thought we had an amazing relationship. He always told me how happy he was. I can't eat or sleep. I feel numb. I just want him with me. My children miss him so much. I'm trying to be strong for them and the baby but deep down I'm dying. Please help

pklme Sat 19-Nov-16 20:01:33

So sorry! That must be so confusing, can you ask your friend what is going on? Maybe he's having a bit of a meltdown, but will sort himself out.

pklme Sat 19-Nov-16 20:02:12

Do you have RL support? Can you get someone to come and keep you company?

Nomorecakey Sat 19-Nov-16 20:43:37

Sadly, nobody is replying to my messages. So all I know is he is ok. I'm hoping and praying I'll hear from him at some point, I need some sort of closure I guess.
I have great friends and family but due the distance I am alone a lot. I'm in so much pain

pklme Sat 19-Nov-16 21:22:09

That's a shame, I hope you hear something soon. I can understand you feel isolated and confused.

Starlight2345 Sun 20-Nov-16 07:57:06

I think you need to find your anger...

Do not text or call him anymore...You do deserve an explanation ..However you do deserve far more than someone who just walks out with no word.

How long ago did he leave?

Afreshstartplease Sun 20-Nov-16 08:00:16

How long has he been gone?

OliviaStabler Sun 20-Nov-16 08:01:09

Have you any idea where he is living?

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 08:16:22

It's been a week and I have no idea where he is but he still has his phone on though!!angry

QforCucumber Sun 20-Nov-16 08:20:13

How long have you been together? Were you living together?
Considering you're carrying his child I'd say you're owed at least an explanation. When is your next scan due? Will he be attending? I'd be furious.

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 08:24:16

We weren't together very long. Everything did happen very quickly. We were living together though.
I have my 20 week scan in a couple of weeks. He was looking forward to it but whether he'll turn up I just don't know

NavyandWhite Sun 20-Nov-16 08:27:16

How awful for you and your DC. How awful of him to do this..

Do you know if he has any previous MH issues? How often did you see him?

NavyandWhite Sun 20-Nov-16 08:28:39

Oh sorry I read that you weren't living together.

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 08:33:19

Yes we were living together and when he wasn't working we spent all our time together. I thought he was happy.
As far as MH issues go, yes I'm aware he's suffered in the past

NavyandWhite Sun 20-Nov-16 08:36:32

Could he have had some kind of relapse?

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 08:44:33

I guess it's possible...

NavyandWhite Sun 20-Nov-16 08:46:34

I hope he gets in touch with soon. Feel for you.

QforCucumber Sun 20-Nov-16 08:52:07

Do you know where he is staying? Has he taken his things?
Do you mind me asking how old he is?
I still agree that you need to find your anger. Understandable if MH relapse but if not then he's left you vulnerable and it screams of disrespect.

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 08:57:53

No I have no idea where he is and he didn't take anything with him. Everything is still here!.
He's 30 and I'm 34.
I agree I need to find my anger but atm I just feel pain.

OliviaStabler Sun 20-Nov-16 09:11:41

Was the baby planned? Just wondering if the thought of fatherhood has freaked him out. It does to some men. No excuse for his behaviour.

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 09:21:23

No it wasn't. We considered all options and when we decided to go ahead with the pregnancy he assured me he would be there to support me. He seemed so interested!. Why wait untill I was 16 weeks!. So confused

PurpleDaisies Sun 20-Nov-16 09:23:17

Did this person you spoke to tell you anything else like whether this a temporary thing?

Barring mental health relapse I don't think I could forgive someone who just walked out with absolutely no explanation.

This thread might get more responses if you had it moved to relationships. Sorry this had happened to you.

Nomorecakey Sun 20-Nov-16 09:27:30

Thank you.
No, unfortunately all I know is that he is ok. My head is all over the place.

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