Am I being unreasonable?!?

(2 Posts)
user1469833591 Sat 30-Jul-16 00:43:38

Brand new to the site and hoping I have placed this in the right area so here we go...
Just some roots:
I am a 25 y.o single mum to my 5 year old son. He has a disability - he is severely visually impaired and has autism. Me and his (now) 30.y.o father split when he was 5 months old.

Whilst his dad has always been in his life, he has never been a strong father. We have scheduled time which he goes to his dad's and this is consistent every week however his time with the littlun is always spent at his mums. So my son has his tea at his nanas a couple of times midweek and stays there every other weekend fri-sun. The littluns dad has his own house (over the road from his mum) but refuses to have him stay there incase he doesn't hear him in the night, once on a week where his mum was away he then relied on his sister! He never asks for any extra time with his son, and even in a fortnight off work he doesn't ask to have him once to take him for dinner or just to spend some time with him however his nana does, His nana is basically the other parent, she does everything for our son whilst he sits back. Though when he is with them they never take him anywhere fun! Tesco and a trip to home bargains is their idea of a trip out. I'm not expecting them to take him for a week abroad but just a trip to the park once a fortnight couldn't hurt surely?

We made a pact when we split up that we needed to be with someone for a year before we introduce them to the littlun, so he hasn't got people walking in and out his life and that we have gotten to know that person as well as we can and about a year ago he started dating someone (20y.o), I am in no way bitter about this as I believe that everyone deserves to be happy. However, he had no problem shoving this in my face, and informing me of how they take her nephew out to the park and do this that, and spending all his free time with her. I have just nodded and smiled for the last year however of course like we agreed he now wants her to meet him and I feel like I'm going to explode. Would it have to take another woman for him to spend time with his son? Will he be painting her a picture of him being the perfect father? Will she understand/take good care of my son and his needs? She could be the sweetest person on earth but the thought of this makes my blood boil.

Am I being unreasonable?!?

Sorry for the long post- this is keeping me awake!!

megletthesecond Sat 30-Jul-16 10:16:07

Ah, he's a being a twat isn't he. He shouldn't be palming his ds off on his Nan (Although I'm sure they both enjoy the time together).

I don't know how the best way to play this is. Is there a specific activity your ds would really enjoy that you could suggest? It's a bloody pain in the backside having to get your xp to parent though isn't it.

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