I'd really appreciate any pointers, sane guidelines etc from anyone who's been through this before.
My ex (3y separated) is moving in his g/f of about 1y. I've not met her (tho my 4 y/o DS has, without my knowing) but have no worries about her being a decent human being (it's my ex - an emotional abuser we had to run away from - that I'm worried about). So I've all kinds of fears about the future but they're not useful!
What I would be v grateful for is practical things to think about:
- as they're not marrying, & my DS is only there 24h/week, what's a helpful explanation of her role in the family? - what kinds of questions are small kids likely to come up with & is there a guideline about explaining (eg like there is with sex ed: answer the question and no more!)? - How much "future-proofing" our explanations is wise/helpful, eg to cover off various possible eventualities without them seeming like huge changes (from marriage, moving and babies to splitting up etc)? - what about my ex's will / house etc? - does their newly increased household income impact on maintenance?
All suggestions gratefully received; every kid / case is different, but seems wise to tap into the hive! Thanks in advance! GI
Thank you, everyone! Sorry for the silence - thought I had notifications set up. Very wise words, and I've got time between now and telling my son to get it all into my head and chill out. A big thanks - really appreciate the calm wisdom!