Holiday contact

(6 Posts)
Youngoldmum Thu 04-Feb-16 13:12:21

Hi
My ex has our DD every other weekend and on Wednesday nights. He has always had this contact & only this (at his request) since we split up 3 years ago.
No court order in place, just statement of arrangements from the divorce

He recently asked for half the school holidays which I agreed to. I drew up 3 versions of the holidays split down, each time he wasn't happy with the split. Eventually I told him I needed to know if he had any objections to the weeks I'd suggested for the summer as I needed to book a holiday. He didn't reply. So I booked the holiday - 6 days but they do include days when he would normally have DD.

He is a very difficult man and will definitely kick off when I tell him the holiday is booked

I guess my question is...do I need to just be firm and say we are going? It's paid in full. Am I within my rights to do this? Our statement of arrangements doesn't mention holidays at all.

I'm trying to avoid legal costs, but wondering if I need to get this formally agreed?

starry0ne Thu 04-Feb-16 14:12:30

I would simply inform it is booked.. There are no reaso can't... I would email..Keeping a copy ..Informing him since prior discussion as you received no objections it is now booked.

You could try mediation but I do wonder if part of him asking was to annoy you and doesn't really want it..

It seems like you are bending over backwards and need to stop.. You could try mediation..

Or tell hm you have made 3 suggestions.. he either takes or leaves.

Youngoldmum Thu 04-Feb-16 14:40:24

I have thought the same about asking for something he didn't really want. He uses the situation to make things more difficult. I totally agree that I need to stop bending over backwards.

Just wasn't sure where I stood legally

Thanks for advice smile

Fourormore Thu 04-Feb-16 14:44:39

Is it abroad? You need his permission to travel abroad but he'd be silly to withhold it.

In future it's perhaps better to send him an email saying "If I haven't heard from you by x date then I will be booking the holiday".

russetbella1000 Sat 06-Feb-16 21:24:20

I only thought you needed permission if a) it's over 28 days and b) a court order is in place...

But could be wrong

Fourormore Sat 06-Feb-16 22:35:26

The Op says no court order is in place. The up to 28 day rule applies to parents who have a residence order in their favour. If there is no residence order then the parent wanting to travel must seek permission from the other parent for any holiday outside of England and Wales.

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