My stbxh left me two years ago when my DC were 3 and 1. It has been up and down ever since with him being really vicious at times and just awful. It feels like every time we get anywhere near to a settled place, he rips the rug out from under my feet.
Last year we moved from DC being with me most of the time with every other weekend with him, to 50/50 care of one week on and one week off. He then refused to return the children saying I could see them weekends if I wanted so I took him to court and they were returned to my care with sporadic contact with him until mediation. We go through mediation and it's agreed he'll have them two nights every week but no weekends... so we've been doing that for the last couple of months or so..
Today, go to get the kids and he tells me he can't look after them at all - one night a month is what he is proposing.. One night!
I sort of get his reasoning as he's unemployed and needs to find work but how about stop fucking the kids around - they don't know if they're coming or going... I know they will now have more stability with me but they have gone from seeing him all the time when we were together, to half the time, to nothing!!
I know I can't force him to see his children but this makes me so sad.. and angry as he gets to walk away and I have to, yet again, change my working hours for the 4th time in a year, pay my solicitor to work up yet another agreement reflecting all this so we can finally get divorced and somehow keep my children believing that their dad does still love them, it's nothing they've done etc etc
They are 5 and 3 and my heart breaks for them
I don't actually know what I want from this thread - just a chance to get it down I suppose... but I'm so worried about money, work, my sanity and making sure I don't fuck up my children - it's just too much
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What do I do now?
14 replies
FushandChups · 01/01/2015 22:13
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