rant!!!!

[skat73]

I just need a rant. STBEXH left me and my 2 dd in July this year, my youngest was just 6 months. Its nothing in particular really but he treats me like I never existed. I have been amicable but im just fed up I want to shout and scream at him and I want to tell my 5 year old that he left rather than mummy and daddy grew apart blah blah. I wouldn't but it pisses me off that he gets off scot free. Anyway rant over.

[Chloebw]

My ex got up and left living with someone else all in the first two weeks of her being born when dd old enough I'm going to tell her the black and white truth and she can make her mind up if she wants a relationship with him! It's easy for men they can just leave women can't do that!

[skat73]

Thanks for all your replies. He does see girls regularly but he is just a Disney dad really. He goes round telling friends that we split up as if it was mutual but it wasn't he just decided he didn't want to try anymore and announced he was leaving. He is such a selfish bastard he wants to be a dad without any of the responsibility.

King Rollo I think you are right he knows he has been a shit to me so he doesn't think about it.

Chloe 2 weeks in that must have been so hard. Im not sure about what to say to girls when they are older . I fear it could back fire on me and I would look like the baddie for being horrible about daddy.

I hate him so much.

[skat73]

Oh my god im exactly the same. One day I can be almost friendly with him but other days im so f*ing angry I cant bear it and im just snappy. He is popping in on Christmas day and im dreading it as I know I might be angry. Have asked my parents to be there to take pressure off a bit.

[Chloebw]

I know 2 single mums with grown up kids: both were just honest with the situation and left the decision up to dc if they wanted to contact their dads. One of them hasn't bothered as she has a happy family unit with step dad. The other did and regretted it almost straight away ( I happen t know this woman well) she says when she met him he was a disappointment and anti climax and wish she had left the mystery/fantasy of a super dad! He left them when she was small and when she confronted him he had no real drive or explanation for it!

[skat73]

Oh my god im exactly the same. One day I can be almost friendly with him but other days im so f*ing angry I cant bear it and im just snappy. He is popping in on Christmas day and im dreading it as I know I might be angry. Have asked my parents to be there to take pressure off a bit.

[Minime85]

skat I'm in exactly same position. he announced in July then we battled on or at least I did til October when I said enough is enough.

its so frustrating when u just want to shout no its him! I so feel exactly what you're saying. I think though we have the moral high ground. and I get the dcs more. I get to pit them to bed and tuck them in and kiss goodnight. I'm there security and safety. your dcs I am sure will feel the same.

although I will never forgive him for what he has done and its me who has to deal with my youngest when she cries for him and is upset that its not fair, at least I know i gave it as much as I could and can hold my head high. so when my DC says its not fair I agree and say I know and try and distract her. equally I then tell him how upset she has been. not to rub it in but he needs to know its not all the smiles when he sees them.

gosh sorry, I got right into that rant!

[skat73]

It seems like a few of us could do with a rant today!

Chloe I am tempted to tell them in the future.

King Rollo - im glad you are getting away over Xmas. Also looked at your quiche thread will be joining soon, little one only 10 months so I qualify!

Minime - I feel very similar to you. My ex didn't even tryjust went.

[Chloebw]

Men these days seem to have so little attachment to their own offspring! I struggle not seeing her when I go
On a mummy daughter date to the cinimea!

[Chloebw]

....if someone took my dc to live with them I would fight to death to make sure I saw her allllll time! It's crazy!

[skat73]

We had been together for 9 years married for 5. When I had my youngest he was horrible to me for 6 months then announced he was leaving. Apparently he was trying all that time. He was horrid to me did nothing to help with the baby. I don't call that trying.

Useless fuckers indeed!

[skat73]

Crikey it all sounds so familiar

[Chloebw]

I got blamed by exbf for leaving because my breast feeding didn't establish and he couldn't take me not listening too me (by the way this was constantly telling me I was neglecting my baby never once that it wasn't my fault or any encouragement to use breast and bottle)!

[Chloebw]

Mine never established eventually dried up completely :(

What he's done has literally ruined everything for me I'm 22 and started my masters when I found out I was pregnant he was all "oh we can juggle childcare till you finish it!"

Now I have had to drop out don't even know if I can go back to my part time Job!!!!

[skat73]

Chloe thats awful. Is there no way you can do your masters?

[Chloebw]

I can't defer as I was halfway through it but I can re sit. Was so pissed off though as was discussing possibly doing a PhD. I have a great job at a bank too which was another possibility of a great career will be lucky if I can get back 2 days now!
Omg kingrollo that's awful! At least we have our dc!