Not really looking for responses, more a dump of mixed up emotions.
Most of the time, me and DD rub along, we have fun, we live the life we want
But the last couple of days, I have felt unbearably bitter and sad. Bitter that I am still alone. Bitter that I still have to do absolutely everything. Bitter that it's my birthday on Tuesday. I won't get taken out for a birthday meal, I won't get any presents, I won't get a cup of tea made for me.
Don't bother the fuck about "oh I know lots of couples where they don't do these things"
These couples presumably share the worries, the workload, and at the very least, the financial burden.
Some of us have to do it all alone.
i have managed to keep the facade for the last 11 months. Birthday month I crumble with the loneliness. Went to B & Q today - saw all the smugs. Wish I had someone to help with the decorating.
And it makes me sick to the stomach, humourous or not, when I read fellow MNers moaning about snoring or some other trivial shit.
You're lucky, the man met you first, that's all.
Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.
Lone parents
So alone
AmIthatHot · 21/09/2013 21:23
Hi sorry you are feeling crap it is my dd birthday on Tuesday. Hope you do still manage to have a nice birthday with your dd.
Hugs 
I am feeling the same as you right now! Have just moved house & area so have had a few months of stressful organising, practical packing/unpacking, DIY, bill sorting & other paperwork all the stuff I'm no good at & would have left to exhub!!!
Feel a mixture of pride that I managed it & sadness that I've done it alone!! I regularly say I am not one of life's copers but I've been doing it for the last 3 years, still the responsibility of it all is hard, it's tiring & draining! I've aged so much in that time & have too become bitter & comfort ate so am not much of a catch for a new man anyway!!!
Nearly 40 
fat stressed out skint !!!
I can identify with everything you've written - it is really,truly crap. Sorry, I'm probably not cheering you up much am I?
Happy Birthday for Tuesday anyway. 
i can so relate to this. i was one of those who had a lovely partner 5 years ago, pregnant with our 3rd. then his heart failed and he dropped dead at work. ever since, ive had the utter piss taken out of me by men.
they either assume im after a 'replacement dad' or some other drastic commitment 
and they run for the hills. or they take advantage of my vulnerabilities (i have asd) and walk over me, emotionally abuse me or cheat, then im back to square one.
either that or i get slimeball married men assuming im 'up for it' and try to make me an 'other woman' by coming onto me n flirting.
im just a month n a half away from having my 4th baby. the wank excuse for a dad started the ol' emotional/mental/verbal abuse, cheated on me n i had to end it (thats a first, its normally me getting dumped). far as i know hes out getting on the lash and sleeping around.
so here i am. i look forward to getting the pitying looks on the postnatal ward, from the married women happily opening their 'push presents' while their hubbies feed the baby.
thats another thing ive heard that narks me off. wives who demand presents for giving birth. entitled.
id just be thankful for a partner that treats me like a human being 
Honey86...
Sending you love & positive thoughts. Good luck with the new arrival x
Oh Honey, ignore the pitying looks and focus on your new arrival.
Ad Nat, thanks for the thought 
.
I do have family and friends, and I am reasonably self sufficient. DD and I went abroad for our hols this year and I managed it all, with no tantrums, etc, but yesterday I just hit a bit of a wall
Back to normal now
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear AmIthatHot,
Happy Birthday to you!!
Birthday greetings OP.
and I could have written this thread word for word. absolutely understand. you could be my clone, exactly same circumstances.
for your birthday.
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Thank you, you are all so sweet. DD made me a paper fan,so I can take it to work to keep cool
She had club this evening and I went back into work while she was there, so no celebrations tonight, but we're having an Italian meal on Saturday instead.
I won't manage a glass of wine, and I'll be paying for it myself but, I'm happy.
Now, I'm hoping that honey is feeling better
kindof.. busy during the day so i dont tend to mope then. its the evenings mostly, when loneliness kicks in.
am a little sick of listening to the other mums chat about their DHs and how lovely theyre being.
plus i discovered today that 2 of my exes who treated me like dirt n used me, are now in relationships and are treating their partners like princesses. its not bloody fair, how come they get such amazing treatment when i just got trampled on. sometimes i wonder if theres something about me that makes me less 'worth it'. sounds selfish of me i know, i shouldnt expect other women to be treated like i was, but it does make me feel bitter IYSWIM...
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