Define direct and indirect contact

(10 Posts)
Missvoom Mon 15-Jul-13 15:02:34

I won't bore you with the 9 year history to this, but I had a final court order a couple of weeks ago that states the fathers application (my ex) for direct contact is dismissed and only indirect contact should take place once a month until my son is of age that he chooses to have direct contact.

Today my ex turned up to sports day being his usual overbearing and intimidating self. So is going to the school to be near my son classed as direct or indirect contact. He did not get a chance to talk to my son as my son quickly ran to me and asked to be taken home, which I did....but that upsets me and him because he was really looking forward to taking part!

So has my ex broken the court order....I don't want to create a fuss or cause trouble, but I would like to be able to get on with our lives in peace, hence we have a court order for indirect contact only!

LalyRawr Mon 15-Jul-13 15:05:54

I think that would be considered direct contact.

I believe (not my area) that indirect contact is things like letters, pictures being sent, sending cards and gifts but not actually seeing the child.

ImAfool Mon 15-Jul-13 15:13:33

I have an adopted dd. She has direct contact with her birth mother which means twice yearly face to face visits at a venue of my choice. She has indirect contact with her birth father which means we exchange letters.

I think your ex has broken the court order.

Lilka Mon 15-Jul-13 18:06:14

That's direct contact

I'm also an adoptive mother, and I've done both direct and indirect contact with siblings and a birth mum.

Direct means anything 'immediate' if that makes sense - face to face visits (like this school sports day) Skype and telephone are all direct contact

Indirect would be letters, photos, emails, or some forms of video (eg. you send the DVD of the school play)

Labro Thu 18-Jul-13 10:16:24

Your ex has broken the court order. You will need to put a copy of the indirect contact order on your son's school file as without it they cannot prevent him attending these sorts of events and indeed technically wouldn't be able to stop him from entering the school premises. Make an appointment with the headteacher immediately and also speak to your solicitor as it seems your ex hasn't understood what indirect contact means and has assumed it also includes some kind of contact with your son if its in public with lots of people present, when at this stage it doesn't

betterthanever Thu 18-Jul-13 12:39:54

Labro is right, I would let school have a copy of the order - he is breaking the law. The order is to protect your DS from the distress he suffered that day. So sorry to hear you have to continue to be put through this. I have PM'd you. He may not have understood the order or say he didn't or he may fully understand it.

kittycat68 Fri 19-Jul-13 08:46:40

I dont think he has broken a court oder unless it prohibits direct contact.
He has a right to attend school activites. If the order just doesnt stipulate any direct contact, again it is not a breach, if this makes sense. Obviously your ex is an arse for doing this tho thier child, but there are many out there that dont seem to care about thier children but merely like to play games! i feel for you op have been in many similar situations!

PrettyPaperweight Fri 19-Jul-13 16:59:00

It depends if it is an order on you to facilitate indirect contact, or on your DS father, preventing him from having direct contact.

I suspect it is the former - in which case, the school cannot prevent him maintaining involvement in his DS life and in fact could be subject to court action themselves if they refused. Can your solicitor apply for a prohibited steps order - preventing any direct contact?

titchy Fri 19-Jul-13 18:30:15

The OP says his application for direct contact was dismissed - I think that's pretty clearly means he is not to have such contact.

PrettyPaperweight Fri 19-Jul-13 18:43:38

It depends, I think - if the hearing was for a Court Order requiring the OP to make their DS available for direct contact then the application can be dismissed without direct contact being prohibited.

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