Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (part 30)

(1001 Posts)
lilacisinlove Sun 27-Feb-11 22:21:52

Yay! I did it again!

Hatesponge Sun 27-Feb-11 22:23:31

beat me to it....

next time! grin


lilacisinlove Sun 27-Feb-11 22:27:15

I know...and I'm supposed to be lesson planning, not MNing!

lilacisinlove Sun 27-Feb-11 22:28:36

mzd, good luck with the new job and isn't it time you came out from under that mistletoe?!

am enjoying it far too much! though getting a bit manky ... so maybe you're right ... and me too re lesson planning though think I may have slightly 'overplanned' ...

bugger here too! again!!!

thought i was 4th too grin

hariboegg Sun 27-Feb-11 22:37:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

one what?grin
am off now ladies nn all smile

hariboegg Sun 27-Feb-11 22:43:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lilacisinlove Sun 27-Feb-11 22:59:04

I guessed that, haribo! Tell us more...

hariboegg Sun 27-Feb-11 23:01:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Flame Sun 27-Feb-11 23:01:45

What a fucking twunt Beaut!!!! i am so so angry for you!!

I am ok. Smurf things are good and I may actually be getting over Carrot!! I still love him to bits but tonight that bashing head yelling whhhhhhyyyyy feeling wasn't there. He has gone home, I am in a v good mood as usual when he's done his thing, but different iyswim.

lilacisinlove Sun 27-Feb-11 23:07:48

I read some of that, was that only last night? I thought you must have met a 'proper' one and you weren't counting the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am guy (for that is what he seems to be if he's gone into hiding!)

I have a lot of experience of men who disappear suddenly and without warning, btw. You can't always see how things are going to turn out, I admit.

hariboegg Sun 27-Feb-11 23:11:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hatesponge Sun 27-Feb-11 23:48:55

Having a slight crisis. Why is it just when I think things are going well they turn to shit? DS1 went to Ex's parents yesterday and I've now found out he left his key there. The key to this house. I changed the locks after Ex left and I know he has wanted to get his hands on a key for ages...bugger bugger bugger

Ex said to DS he would drop the key off tomorrow. After he has been round and let himself it/taken loads of stuff like he did last time/had it copied.

Oh no Sponge can you not get anyone around to the house tomorrow to sit in or very costly I know call out emergency locksmith.

Thanks everyone for being so great.
Flame twunt made me laugh that's the perfect description.

Aurora Thanks for chat on fb it really helped.

Only thing is I can't sleep grrrr.This will be my fourth night of no sleep as been ill all week too.Men why did I ever bother.

Snapespeare Mon 28-Feb-11 07:20:27

only thread marking! welcome haribo !

off to the station!

molemesseskilledIpom Mon 28-Feb-11 08:49:36


Can I join?

hallo to haribo <sorry!> and to mole smile

beaut - no problem at all smile

sponge - hopefully you can get the locks changed (again)?

all ok here, i should hear from prospective new agents if the moving in date is acceptable so fingers crossed biscuit

Morning.Well i managed to get a few hours sleep and feel ok at the moment not sure how long it will last.

Welcome to haribo and mole.

lou33 Mon 28-Feb-11 10:06:55

place marking

elastamum Mon 28-Feb-11 10:08:55

Ohh new thread!!! Hi all,

Welcome to haribo and mole.

Date tonight, am in the office looking remarkably scrubbed up as going straight from work.

Lilac, have thought about what you said and have decided that I am going to ask him all the questions that I need answers to - but maybe not all at once.

Will let you know how I get on grin

beaut - glad you managed to sleep smile

elasta - good luck for tonight smile

will be off for a couple of days now (well i should be lol) am going to try and sort out house so fingers crossed please lol grin
<gawd am nervous now, i wish the agent would flaming well ring!>

Elasta Good luck on the date hope you have a great time.

Flame Yay for 'maybe' geting over Carrot a maybe is a start.

hariboegg Mon 28-Feb-11 10:47:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tookoolforskool Mon 28-Feb-11 10:47:51

elasta - have afab time

beautician, glad you slept. Still think thats appalling behaviour.....

Flame, well done on the maybe getting over carrot.

Sponge, grrrrr.

star- good luck for the move.

logged into pof this morning as id not been on for a few days, and budist has asked me out again. woohoo. He asked for dinner in the week but since babysitting will be a bit difficult ( trying to save it for the weekends) then could we do coffee on sat.
the texts from TB seem to have got a bit less. Am sensing maybe cold feet.

JustForThisOne Mon 28-Feb-11 10:58:26

can I ask a question to the onlinedatingxpertteam?
chatting to guy, just the one, its kind of regular but we talk crap...very superficial staff...
what does it mean? is that normal? we cannot meet right away even if we wanted to cause we are very far for the moment, so this may explain slow pace and not getting too personal...still...he is not asking any personal questions

Marcus123456 Mon 28-Feb-11 11:04:18

reading what you say being a man i would say he is just being sure of who he is chatting to why not, also so he may just want a person to chat too that's men at times we are not all like B.J good luck with it ..

tookoolforskool Mon 28-Feb-11 11:31:19

budist can only do sunday afernoon.
Im meant to be seeing TB all day sunday.

TB cant do saturday.

What do i do?

adamschic Mon 28-Feb-11 11:34:18

Lot's of new posters goody, hi to everyone and place marking.

Haribo, at worst, you got back in the saddle, at best, he will contact you and you can have more of the same. Unfortunately, after sex, it's still the old fashioned, man should contact first, annoying but true. Even if he sex was brilliant, you can never tell what their agenda is at such an early stage and we've all experienced ones who do a disappearing act. So if yours does this then just say NEXT!

Took If it were me i would go for the guaranteed sex to be honest blush.So TB.He may not turn out to be your one but i'm sure you will have a pretty big smile for the rest of the week grin

Fucking arse.Im in Leicester on saturday for mates birthday.DG text saying can he drop my key and a few other bits at hotel.So i replied yes stick it in an envelope and ill let reception know.Then i got back 'Will do'.'Will i see you'.WTF i just put back NO.

I'm out on saturday,i'm single,i plan to get drunk and i have a hotel room with a lovely big bedwink

Snapespeare Mon 28-Feb-11 11:45:17

no train man again! he's either been off for a dirty extended weekend with Natalie Portman, or sitting next to me on Thursday has put the fear of god into him and he's now getting a later train. ahh well!

tookoolforskool Mon 28-Feb-11 11:52:13

beautician. i think thats what im inclinded to go for. Plus TB has continually said he wants more than that ( altough may just be a ploy to get me to sleep with him)
Whereas budists profile says hes not looking for any committment or relationship.

I cant believe the cheek of DG. Seriously.

snape, natalie portman was maybe a bit busy this weekend... maybe he was too busy making himself look lovely and was late?? OR The over excitment from thursday gave him high blood pressure and the doctor advised him to take it easy for a few days?

Took i know he's taking the piss now.But you know what the say best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.So thats my plans for the weekend sorted grin

Snape I agree with Took he must be ill.You have obviously got him all over excited.Flippin men can't be relied on for anything haha.

Took Budists profile would put me off to be honest.I don't understand going on a 'dating site' and yet not looking for a relationship?????
When i first started on the sites i tried to kid myself that i would be cool with someone that just wanted friends but i didnt want any friend i wanted a boyfriend.I think if they put no to relationship and or commitment then what they are really asking for is a fuck buddy.

tookoolforskool Mon 28-Feb-11 12:08:56

well. it is kind of perplexing isnt it.
The one that says no committment, and profile says hes just looking for dates and to see where it goes, quite possibly implies very very casual dating. and acually, hes not even asked what i do for work or anything....

but TBS profile says very clearly he wants a relationship and he has said that lots and lots of times and made it very clear that is what he would like and maybe we could do this on a day out, or this on a night in... hes asked lots and lots of questions... but its also been rather x rated and sex when we meet is likely ( so really, all the other stuff could be a ruse?)

who knows. men!

And yes, he is really taking the piss... he wants to see you after hes just dumped you?? what planet is he from>

ach never thought i would have to wait for referencing to go through

<glum> it's gonna make it bit pushed for time isn't it? fingers crossed i think

and please can we all keep our figners crossed for lou's dog? thank you xx

lou33 Mon 28-Feb-11 13:44:11

thank you, it isnt looking good for her atm tbh

((((((((((lou and family)))))))))))

Oh lou, I've been keeping up on facebook, sending positive, healing vibes.

When do you need to be out of your present home by, Aurora?

Good attitude Beaut, anger is your friend right now!

Another vote for going to meet TB here too, took.

Hello to Newbies and everyone else <waves>

Ahhh Lou sorry have been caught up in my own little self indulging world.Sorry blush.Hope dog is ok fingers crossed for you.xxxx

hariboegg Mon 28-Feb-11 14:23:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sincitylover Mon 28-Feb-11 19:09:03

place marking

((((((((((((( to lou and family))))))))))))))

Snapespeare Mon 28-Feb-11 20:37:11

sending a tiny little bit more love to dora

tookoolforskool Tue 01-Mar-11 07:57:23

lou.. i dont know what, if anything has happened. but thinking of you.

elsta - how did last night go?

beautician - how you feeling today?

snape -did TM reappear?

well. texts from TB have dropped off rather a lot. hmm
to about 4 yesterday. when er, the number of texts daily prior to that were ( hold on while i work it out) 250 ish blush

This may or may not mean sunday isnt happening now. But im not going to chase him, he may just have been busy, he did say he was spening time with his sister and neice. In any case im off into town to buy new underwear and a new top. Because ive not had new pants for AGES. ( you should see the state of some of my older ones..its more than embarassing)

if he cancells i shall just see budist sunday instead. then no more dating really while exhusband is away. Incidentally i was a bit cheeky last night and asked him if he would get me a few things from the country he is going too.. on the basis that he knows ive been after them for years.. ( hes been 3 times before and failed to bring the correct thing back. He laughed and said of course he would. Which is quite amazing. and shall be more amazing if he brings the right thing back.

lou33 Tue 01-Mar-11 09:15:03

took, one of my dogs had to have emergency surgery on sunday evening and may not make it, things are 50/50 right now

thanks everyone i will try and keep you updated

sad i tried to kid myself that i'm fine but even despite the way he ended it i still love him i can't stop crying its getting embarrassing.

SparklyMily Tue 01-Mar-11 09:43:43

hey everyone

Lou, Dora, ((((()))))) sad

BNM, sad more ((((((())))) for you too, is v v hard and you won't get over it just like that, be gentle on yourself

Elasta, how did last night go?

Sponge, yay for dates

Took, yay for new pants grin

Eve, keep it up off the fags

Snape, traiiiinnnn maaaaaannn?

SparklyMily Tue 01-Mar-11 09:49:15

PS, MZD yay for job grin

Flame, yay for Smurf

elastamum Tue 01-Mar-11 10:25:43

Lou, (((((sad)))), hope Dora is doing OK. We have lots of dogs and it is heartbreaking when they are really sick.

Beaut, really sorry it has not worked out for you.

Well, last night was great. We met near mine, just a really nice evening, really easy conversation all night. Neither of us is dating anyone else, though his ex doesnt know he is dating and he doesnt know what she is doing either as they just dont discuss that sort of thing. Long kiss and cuddle in pub car park again - really must stop meeting like this!

I decided to to stay over near his this week as temptation just too great and I want us to get to know each other first. So we are going to the pictures thursday night when I am on my way home. So far, so good smile

SparklyMily Tue 01-Mar-11 10:51:35

elasta, gosh, sounds very promising smile, so pleased for you, have got everything crossed GW has it in him to be good enough for you

Zanywany Tue 01-Mar-11 11:07:38

Hi everyone

Not surprised you feel so sad Beautician as it hasn't been long and I think your doing the righ thing in not seeing him as it will just prolong things for you. Agree with getting under someone else to get over someone grin

Hope your dog is OK Lou, keeping my fingers crossed for you.

SPonge hope you've got your key back without any copies being made, I've had to had new locks a couple of times, makes me angry to think a guy would make you have the expense just so you can feel safe in your own house.

Any news on Sunday yet Tookool

elastamum Tue 01-Mar-11 11:18:01

Hey MILY, That sould have said NOT staying over near his!! At least not yet.

Am hopeful about this one. He is just really nice, grounded, very very bright, but not an idiot alpha male like most of the men I have dated. And a very good snog, def a spark blush

lou33 Tue 01-Mar-11 12:23:22

Hi, and thanks for your concern

There has been no change so far. Am taking the girls to see her at 2 pm si can tell you more then

adamschic Tue 01-Mar-11 12:38:09

Hey Lou, hope she improves. stdavids

tookoolforskool Tue 01-Mar-11 12:38:52

hope there is a change for the good.

ive heard from him, swapped a few texts. he did mention sunday...
But has gone all quiet again. Decided to text him that i hope hes ok as hes gone a bit quiet, and did he want to cancel sunday... no point messing about after all that has been said and seen. lol

oh, hes replied about 2 seconds later.

eastamum. that sounds liek it went pretty perfectly. am [jealous]

beautican.. bless you. of course you still love him, you dont stop loving someone over night, no matter how much of an arse they have been. Eat chocolate and be nice to yourself....

am very excited, not only do i have new pants, i also have sissor sisters tickets!!!! Which completes my summer music plans. cant wait. love it!!

Flame Tue 01-Mar-11 13:16:24

Thinking of you Lou. My mum's dog has been hit and miss lately

I am lost with everyone apart from Beaut, although even there - is this a general man to be under to get over or a specific possible??

Seeing Smurf tonight, he is cooking for me. Mattarse is talking to me again Not in that way, I am done with that, and assuming he is too. He seems to have fallen for someone, but is being v cagey as to who which is annoying as I am a nosy cow. Didn't realise how much I had missed chatting with him though.

Smurf still deflects everything with another one liner. I can't tell if he is evasive or if it is a protective wall thing. The occasions when he has relaxed and opened up he seems fine, so I think it is probably a wall. We've all got em in different ways I guess. Too much hurt in life not too.

Flame Tue 01-Mar-11 13:18:15

TooK - is yours the hot one that you didn't know if it was a fling or what?

Snapespeare Tue 01-Mar-11 13:45:32


TK - so you're ON for sunday? new pants! whaheyyy!

Beaut. it will pass, really.

Flame, sounds like a lovely evening

trainman was bloody EARLY (or i was late!) & the train was ON TIME. I dashed down the stairs to see train pulling out of station and TM happily sitting in a seat with a SPARE SEAT OPPOSITE HIM.

I am sulking.

tookoolforskool Tue 01-Mar-11 14:34:18

Gggrrr. How annoying.
Did he look like he was just back from a weekends with some Natalie portman type... or did he look like he was looking for train woman, ie you??

I think Sunday is still on, he didn't say otherwise? I have a feeling it might end up being cancelled though.. you can sort of tell when someobes not feeling it anymore can't you.

I'm sort of not fussed either way.

lou33 Tue 01-Mar-11 14:44:37

Dora was more like dora today iyswim.

The vet says its still early days but she looks in less pain and acted like it too. I know that is in some part down to her methadons, but an improvement is an improvement yes?

elastamum Tue 01-Mar-11 15:38:52

Hi Lou, I do hope she is on the mend. Sending her a dog biscuit (in a nice way!) biscuit and some wine for you wine smile

lou33 Tue 01-Mar-11 16:51:08


i have done my final visit today with the boys to see her, and she is def more herself , but still a long way to go

she has been sick once, but that us being thought to be related to the combination of drugs she is on, so she has been given an anti emetic, and her tummy was sore today, probably because she tried to put her paws on ds2 in his wheelchair

overall the vet is pleased with her but agrees she still has reason to be cautious

Snapespeare Tue 01-Mar-11 18:57:31

potential new flatmate just left - smoking hot in a Dan Draper way. must not perve over potential flat mate.

yes, clearly train man was scanning platform for me - or sitting looking at his infernal iphone, chatting away to natalie portman. ...envy

Hatesponge Tue 01-Mar-11 20:10:18

who is Dan Draper? blush am sure I prob should know....damn popular culture

lou, SO pleased to here good news re dora. Know it's early days though and will be keeping my fingers crossed, but lets hope she's over the worst and on the road to recovery!

tookool, anything more re TB? Hopefully he won't cancel...but i know what you mean about getting that feeling that they're about to - think my date for Sat has blown me out; I didnt reply to an email for about 2 hours (I was busy!) and he sent me some flouncy mail saying I knew where he was if I wanted to keep in touch! hmm Can't bear passive-aggressive men. So am prob going to cancel now myself even if he still wants to meet.

beaut, dont be hard on yourself, I know it sounds ever so trite but just give it time (((())))

elasta, good news re date, sounds as though is all going well

all kicked off at work today - not directly connected to me but my team members and others, HR now involved, top manager coming down tomorrow to sort it, cant say too much about it but basically all down to 1 totally unreasonable, v volatile person....not good.

Snapespeare Tue 01-Mar-11 20:44:36

oh sponge - feel for you with your workstuff. stress stress stress!

tsk at self = don draper = oh my!

please live with me mister draper. i'll make you martinis! [blush}

Hatesponge Tue 01-Mar-11 21:08:56

oooh snape, how exciting! have come over all blush and grin

if he moves in please can you invite me round for martinis, I don't live far away....grin I'll bring my own olives!

Snapespeare Tue 01-Mar-11 21:13:39

you would be very welcome! clearly i could not shag my very recently unpartnered absolutely delightful male flatmate. what would train man think!? ;)

Hatesponge Tue 01-Mar-11 21:21:47

we could double date with train man and new flatmate!

and a tray of martinis...so sophisticated!


sorry am getting over excited! I blame this at least in part on the sight of a naked Rupert Penry-Jones on TV a few minutes ago....

elastamum Tue 01-Mar-11 22:28:20


Well I have had an interesing evening. Have been climbing with DS2 and who should walk right into me but traveller - oldies might remember him - he who I dated for a while, then took me out to dinner to tell me all about his new GF!

Still as seriously fit as ever, starts chatting as if he last saw me a few days ago, rather than six months, telling me how he has been all over the world and also BTW that its not happening with GF any more.

Then proceeds to be absolutely great with DS2,talking climbing with him and giving him tips. When we go to leave, says he will come along for a coffee on sat to watch DS2 in his competition.

He still makes me go weak at the knees and I've no idea why - you should see him climb though ladies, he brings a whole new dimension to the word fit blush.

BUT Having just met the lovely Mr GW, he is the last person I need back in my life right now confused

Flame Tue 01-Mar-11 23:35:08

Oooooooooooh I think traveller was when I first started. Or was at least mentioned more then.

Glad Dora isn't getting worse iyswim.

XH attempted to do the whole rargh you're back obscenely late (11.20pm), I have work tomorrow bit. It would have been more effective were the tart's car not parked outside. He either borrowed it or she hid down. They are insane.

Smurf fab.

tookoolforskool Wed 02-Mar-11 07:46:42

lou, glad shes looking good at the momment. everything crossed for you.

snape. wow. i would be following him around with my tongue hanging out of my mouth. Whens he letting you know if hes taking it by?

sponge - sorry about the work thing, and hope you date hasnt got cold feet about sat. ( yeah, i reckon its quite easy to tell)

elasta - i dont know the traveller story, but bloody timing. still if he was the one who took you to dinner to tell you he was seeing someone else??? probably wouldnt go there.

still have no idea about TB. We was working till 10.30last night. Text me about 8pm ish and then again at 11.30, just general chit chat stuff. Feels a bit flat.

Flame Wed 02-Mar-11 11:11:45

Well if nothing else, Smurf is good for my house. I am trying to get it straight so he can come round at some point

<place marking again>

Snapespeare Wed 02-Mar-11 12:19:30

Don Draper will not be living with us - he's found somewhere else - oh! cruel rejection!

I sat opposite trainman this morning. it was the only seat left - the only alternative would have been to stand all the way into London. Our knees bumped a couple of times. and he caught he drooling hmmlooking at his reflection in the window a couple of times and smiled - so I then had to pretend to be asleep, or i would have.. i don't know... (!) he has amazing eyes. chocolate brown.

elasta - traveller sounds interesting maybe it just wasn't right the first time round...<must go climbing!>

Flame Wed 02-Mar-11 12:26:12

Can you take a sneaky photo of train man please

say hello to him snape!!

Snapespeare Wed 02-Mar-11 14:07:08


how could I possibly take a 'sneaky' photo of train man! I could only do this if there were a convienient hole at my feet about to swallow me up if he saw me take it.

I stood up after him on the train and watched his arse him walk out of the station. amazing eyes. FABulous arse!

JustForThisOne Wed 02-Mar-11 14:42:52

is he keeping the opposite seat available or what?
how come on a busy train it is always empty?
uhmm... why dont you ask? grin
or, I would go and seat somewhere else, this agony is torturing me! smile

tookoolforskool Wed 02-Mar-11 15:46:46

you need to follow him, like some kind of detective investigator. all hiding behind lamp posts. make sure you do some comedy tip toeing as well.

heard nothing from TB ALL day. I know hes working but i know he will have had breaks.. becuase last week he was constantly texting me in them.
Im suspecting sunday is off. I think ill leave buddists as set for two weeks time, becuase im not that fussed, and have got a childs party invite to go to that day too.

Flame Wed 02-Mar-11 17:25:25

Pretend to be texting up high?

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 17:49:35

Love the train man update!! grin

Well GW is taking me out tomorrow night again!!! Am smile.

As for traveller, lets wait and see whether he ships up on Saturday before I worry what to say. Ds2 has decided he really likes him - been telling my au pair all about him this morning! confused

tookoolforskool Wed 02-Mar-11 18:19:46

Flame, I don't understand what you mean?

Elasta, 4 th date... no wonder your

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 19:26:54

5th date too kool!! and he is taking me to see a film he has already seen as I wanted to go [grn]

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 19:27:16

oops! grin

Hatesponge Wed 02-Mar-11 19:29:32

elasta 4th date great news!

snape shame about flatmate, but on the plus side - train man grin we need a photo....try and stand up when he's sitting down, maybe better angle/less obvious than sitting next to him. As will be apparent, I am useless at this stuff. Others will give you better advice as to surreptitious photo-taking

tookool, thats a shame re TB. Has he not mentioned Sunday at all recently?

Am not bothering with Sat date, too much hard work. Was quite optimistic about the one a week on Friday, until today that is. Met friend for lunch - the one who's v good mates with WM - and spent entire lunch with him telling me all about what WM has been up to, how drunk he was at the weekend etc. which has made me realise that I'm not half as interested or attracted to anyone on POF as I am/was to WM. Am telling myself this is simply because I know him well, whereas the POF blokes are more unknown quantities. And I guess at least they are prepared to go out with me, which is more than he was!

Why am I even still interested in what he's doing?....blush

Hatesponge Wed 02-Mar-11 19:30:00

5th date, better still

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 19:33:41

Yes, going out near his, then will be driving home. But have decided if it goes well he will get an invite to mine the next weekend the kids are away. Even I can only hold out so long in the face of passionate good night snogs blush

lou33 Wed 02-Mar-11 20:51:07

i need a stiff drink, who has some?

lilacisinlove Wed 02-Mar-11 21:27:13

Not me, except for wine...what's up?

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 21:29:19

whats up Lou??

lou33 Wed 02-Mar-11 21:46:59

unbelievably, eddie, my 8 month old jack russell/ patterdale cross was attacked a couple of hours ago by a german shepherd, when my girls were walking him down our road on their way back home

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 21:53:12

Oh no, poor you, poor Eddie! Is he OK?

lilacisinlove Wed 02-Mar-11 21:58:48

lou, whatever next sad...are he and the girls ok?

lou33 Wed 02-Mar-11 22:19:43

he was dashed to the vet with puncture wounds and bruising and a bloodshot eye, plus a nosebleed

dd1 was kicking the other dog trying to get it off, and it went for her tho missed

the owner was doing the same but it bit her
dd2 was trying to pull eddie away

dd2 is v shakey about it all, the gs owner has paid for eddies vet bill and is v apologetic etc, but despite that i do think i need to report it, what if it had been a child?

elastamum Wed 02-Mar-11 22:52:23

OMG that is awful, I think you should report it too. It could have so easily been much worse. Dog needs to be muzzled and on a lead at least.

Poor you, that is all you need right now ((((hugs))))for you all sad

lou33 Wed 02-Mar-11 23:03:04

i think i need a dark padded room to recover from this last week lol

Snapespeare Wed 02-Mar-11 23:48:31


me and PM are writing a screenplay. had very nice email dialogue today about horrible fight between female lead and her soon-to-be ex. was describing the awful sex they have in contrast to how sex clearly should be, (oh! tender, romantic, emotional - how things go 'wrongh', it really doesn't matter - it's a conspiracy that no-one else knows about...) therefore laying the inferance that should PM & I ever go there, oh! it would be...rrrr!

lovely friend from 20 years ago staying over tonight after dinner, therefore i have a handsome man to accompany me on the train tomorrow morning. hah! take that train man!

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 08:55:45

You lot are a shocking influence and i am stealth-snape <brandishes i-phone>

although i think i might have been caught. but there is now photographic evidence of train-man. for me to wank over (cough!) look at.

tookoolforskool Thu 03-Mar-11 09:05:42

you need to send it to us on facebook for us all to perve over.

Text TB last night, no reply. Thats off then.
Have set up date with buddist for 2 weeks time. cant be arsed.

I am seriously condisering wiping my profiles and going on a dating stike.

lol at took grin

<can you kind ladies please help me here pretty please?grin>

it's the berry colour one i like

Hatesponge Thu 03-Mar-11 10:33:59

snape you must send the evidence on FB grin we need to see him!

tookool, but I know how you feel. Next friday's date also appears to be ignoring me, was online last night but didnt reply to my email, so not looking good. and has the effect of making me dwell on WM, and how if only I was thin and prettier, WM would have been interested in me and I wouldn't have to worry about all this blush

is all quite crap really!

sponge you are pretty!!!
(i can't remember your fb name though sorry blush)

adamschic Thu 03-Mar-11 11:48:15

Hi to everyone, haven't had chance to catch up. Had an awful week, am going out for tea tonight, just me and DD. Seeing EV on Saturday night, think I need a good night out on the town so will drive over and stop the night.

hi you smile hoep the week finishes on a better note for you xx


sincitylover Thu 03-Mar-11 12:53:30

hi all - haven't had an awful week sorry to hear about those who have esp Lou- hope both dogs are ok.

Eve - weekend sounds good for you - I like a sleepover every now and again wink

Snape - have I missed photo of train man? Are you in SE London (if it's not giving too much away)?

TK - was TB going to be new underwear man?

But this week seems to have gone so fast - I declared it an admin week at work when I would catch up on paperwork and emails but so far haven't achieved as much as I could have done.

Had to work from home yesterday as DS1 had anxiety/stomach pains/lost appetite and not much sleep so I let him stay home. In his last test he felt sick and dizzy and school have agreed he can sit at back of hall in future.

DS2 got good report except for handwriting - we now have to crack on with getting him ready to view and apply for secondary school.

Which as we know is a complete minefield as some schools in my borough are complete no gos in terms of area and desirability.

Feel more relaxed about it though than I did with ds1 even though no sibling policy.

jsut posting quickly before i really have to dash off for the bus .... (will catch up later hopefully grin)

I GOT THE NEW HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 14:46:46

aurora!! outstanding! well done!!

sincitylover yes. good grief, were you on a train this morning and the woman standing-in-front-of-you- took-a-pic-of-the-punky-guy-sitting-in-the-corner-and you-thought-'crazed-psychopath'-and-backed-away-a-little-even-though-it-was-a-very-very-crowded-train- and-the-fact-that-he-looked-up-at-the-unmistakable-sound-of-an-iphone-camera-clicking-means-NOTHING-because-that-could-have-been-anyone.


sending an fb to took, sponge i can't remember your real name(!) sorry! if anyone else is interested in my sad little stalkinghabits, please message me on fb or inbox me here if we are not yet friends on fb and i'll add you.

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 15:03:34

hang on!

'....how if only I was thin and prettier, WM would have been interested in me and I wouldn't have to worry about all this blush '

...i have NEVER heard such NONSENSE in my LIFE! physical attraction is one thing, but it's not everything. Lust passes, people age and grow fat and saggy and if someone only liked you because 'you' were thin and pretty then you'll be spending too long worrying about when he will leave you for a thinner/prettier model. stuff that.

sincitylover Thu 03-Mar-11 15:07:23

aurora - great news (that's two bits of good news in two days - my friends daughter got into school of choice)

Snape - no don't get train to work lol - go on boat (where I did have boatman for a while but then had grim realisation he was clone of exh and also very skinny)

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 15:10:51

<sigh of relief!> now i just need to worry about everyone else on the train knowing what I'm up to.

Hatesponge Thu 03-Mar-11 15:51:22

Snape - am initials AO on FB, picture of 2 children on a beach (taken there by Ex-P, paid for by me...!)

I know the thin/pretty thin is silly, WM is terribly shallow though. V gorgeous blush but shallow. And I know he is exactly the sort of man I would never feel pretty enough for, even if I did ever get to go out with him....not that theres any chance of that.

well done re house aurora!

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 16:13:13

gotcha! let me know if it's sent - it's not showing up in my messages and i worry that i've (1) sent it to took twice! (lucky took!) & (2) sent it to someone incredibly inappropriate by mistake blush

sponge - now i remember yougrin

i knew it was too good to last. i still have house but on the way to ballet, dd asked if her dad had said anything about moving - i thought it was what had already been said. only it wasn't. he feckless arrogant fuckwit-- has been talking to her without mentioning it to me first about her still seeing me which, in his language, means dd staying with him and seeing me every other weekend [sadsadsad i foudn it really difficult to bond with her when she was born, i couldn't even name her myself - he picked her first name(didn't believe she was his, didn't even want her if she had downs and expected me to abort if she did - even though my aunty (RIP aunty) was downs and expected me to face my family on my own if i did, made me have test at docs because he trusted them more than me to do the test properly adn wouldn't believe me until the receptionist told him that home tests were now 'better' than docs ...) i always knew he would try to take her away from me and now the fuckwit has said to dd about her living with him. sadsadsadsadsad wtf do i do???????

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 16:28:55

Aurora. sad

i know this is really difficult, because you automatically go into panic-mode, but please don't freak out just yet. How old is DD? how long have you and XP been seperated? How often does he see her at present? is DD still able to attend same school etc if/when you move? are you junping to conclusions at all? ( i don't mean that to sound as harsh as it does, you know what i mean - would the feckless arrogant fuckwit man mean something else?)

sometimes people say stuff to children thatthey have NO intention of carrying out. (by which i mean, 'not us') My boys missed where we used to live. My ex offered for them to live with him, without saying a word to me, despite his inability to house our DD while she is doing her exams because his gfis a fucking bitch and you know what? nothing else has been said about it - at all.

in my case, it's a guilty-dad-promising-thiings-he-can't-deliver to make himself feel better. sod all about what the DCs want.

she is nearly 6.
about 3 and half years now
only if we catch the bus at half 7 in the morning, and i spend a fortune on bus fare 12 for me for a week's pass, not sure about dd's fare.
sadly not jumping to conclusions at all, that's the kind of guy he is.

he has also been promising to take her away on holiday for the past 3 and half years. to portugal - the exact same area where madeline mccann went missing, no holiday; same with hamster for over 2 years, still no hamster.

and she was previously excited about moving to nicer house, she ahs seen the outside of it, until the fecker put his 2pennorth in

right i have to go now dd's class will be finishing soon, thansk snape smile
will try and post again 2moro night sadangrysadangry mixed feelings ...

tookoolforskool Thu 03-Mar-11 18:21:13

i am jealous. really. Confirms my beliefe you have very good taste in men. i would.
i also cant believe he is looking right at you... lol
how on earth did you get away with that>
Surely its a talking point now???
lol. you have cheered me up no end.

sponge - it is pooh. Today i have also had fatness/uglyness thoughts. Esp as the guy needed of even brought me a drink, i was quite prepared to just shag him and that be that. Seems im not even good enough for a one night stand now.
as a consolation prize i have worn my new underwear all day ( yes it was underwear man) and brought a big bag of mini eggs on the way home. which i shall eat, while sitting on the sofa wearing my dressing gown. Fuck you dating life!!! lol

star - congrats on the house. secondly, dont panic.i second what snape says.

lou, hows the dogs? Cannot believe what happed to your second one as well.

anyway - this mornings ( and last nights... due to lack of sleep) bad moods have gone. I was in a foul mood. thikning i wasnt even good enough for a one night stand. AND i was going to cause a huge row with mr big too. Not for any reason, just for being angry at men i think.

Its just another example of male fuckwittery. I seriously doubt i will ever meet anyone decent ever off online dating. its just full of too many people with hidden agendas.It is very very difficult to stay positive and upbeat about it all i think.

anyway - going for another perve over 'sex on legs train man' as i have no renamed him.

Snapespeare Thu 03-Mar-11 18:49:44

well, i'm not entirely sure i did get away with it. I continued imaginary-typing a text on my iphone- but have just reminded myself that he was plugged into his iphone - so there is a (admittedly somewhat faint) possibility that he didn't hear the '*click'*

underwear & mini eggs took. bloody marvelous! I do like that Train man merited caps-lock! ;)

lou - sending pooch-love.

just popped to the garage and bumped into PM, stood chatting for ages. sigh! he's my albatross. had smashing emails with him today as well. the break-up scene we're writing is coming along nicely. am enjoying talking about rubbish-relationships with him as am evily manipulating him to not have relationships with anyone else.


off for anpther gant at train-man. it's (cough!) research!

Flame Thu 03-Mar-11 20:06:40

where where where is trainman!?!?!?!?!

Flame Thu 03-Mar-11 20:07:56

I am not taking in anything v v tired for some reason.

Convinced myself that Smurf hated me as he had not spoken to me all day.

Turned out google chat was broken blush THAT would have been a much more sane reason what with me not getting emails either.

Hatesponge Thu 03-Mar-11 20:12:46

TM is very nice, objectively speaking - def not my type though, owing largely to my phobia about men with hair any longer than a no2 cut..!

tookool I love mini eggs, that sounds like a great way to metaphorically stick two fingers up at shit men/dating etc.

next weeks date has resurfaced...so we'll see. He's still not WM but I have to keep reminding myself WM is a stupid fool who will remain single (and living in his mum and dad's box room) for the rest of his life the way he's going. Whereas I am fabulous and it is his loss, not mine.

Eventually, I might even believe it grin

You should believe it, sponge, it's all true, you're gorgeous, intelligent,and successful, unfortunately, unworthy men are intimidated by that... you just need to find one that is worthy of you.

sincitylover Thu 03-Mar-11 21:16:46

you are fab sponge smile

SparklyMily Fri 04-Mar-11 09:26:59

happy birthday Elasta stdavids. Yay for GM grin

can you link me to TM Snape?

Sponge, what the others said

Lou, hope dogs are doing ok

Zanywany Fri 04-Mar-11 09:31:38


Any new today on train man Snape

How are your dogs Lou

Reese12 Fri 04-Mar-11 10:12:51

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Hatesponge Fri 04-Mar-11 12:25:48

happy birthday from me too elasta

not feeling very fabulous today. Ex has been a total tosser and am having to stop him seeing the boys immediately until he can behave like an adult. Downside is I now have to cancel night out with friends tonight (and incur their wrath) and any other plans for the foreseeable future.

elastamum Fri 04-Mar-11 13:38:41

Hi All, Thanks for your birthday wishes. Am feeling a bit tired today as went out with GW last night and didnt get in until after midnight. He said he wants to see me again when we can spend some time together where we dont have to drive - he will bring the wine grin

Sponge, sorry your ex being an arse -its really not fair. This morning my ex has sent me b'day flowers and chocs from the kids. shock

Going to be a busy weekend here. Climbing tommorrow and might even see traveller again. (I had a dream about him last night, - bit worrying really confused) One of my g'friends says I should not re engage with him. Another says I should just date both of them if I get the chance!

Then DS1's party on Sunday.

Expect, I will be in pieces by Monday morning

lou33 Fri 04-Mar-11 15:15:13

Happy birthday elasta grin

SparklyMily Fri 04-Mar-11 15:59:11

Elasta, sounding v good re GW. Personally I think I would steer clear of Traveller.......

Sponge, really sorry to hear about your X

Aurora, hope things are going better for you, at least the house is sorted? Sorry i have done nothing with your CV yet, I am rubbish blush

How's it going Zany? Any more romantic dates??

have a great weekend everyone

Snapespeare Fri 04-Mar-11 19:49:26

happy birthday elasta! stdavids

sparkly-one are you on fb? I resolutely refuse to pop Train man on photobucket, as i would die of stalker-shaaaaame.

no train man today suspect he has photo-shyness and is now taking a much later train. for the next ten years. or will move house to avoid me! (woe!)

No platonic man tonight. i miss him.

however, saw a guy today, i hadn't seen for 20 years and fucking-hell i am comparatively wearing well! ;)

and i have a bottle of vodka. yay!

Snapespeare Fri 04-Mar-11 19:54:08


happy birthday elasta smile

snape - i cannot see train man are you on my fb? am blush if you are grin

mily - thank you don't worry though grin
yes i move three weeks tomorrow (<gulp> and a big <gulp> wine cos have none in the house)

sincitylover Fri 04-Mar-11 21:34:04

snape - what are your initials on facebook?

hi sin how are you? smile

sincitylover Fri 04-Mar-11 22:09:11

fine thx aurora - just so pleased it's the weekend.

a few glasses of wine also helping grin

grin we haven't got any here (am at vimes' house for weekend and dd's now fast asleep, vimes is at work and there's no wine!!)

sincitylover Fri 04-Mar-11 22:28:46

sorry just realised you don't have wine so here is a virtual wine

ah thank you grin i likes a nice drop of claret gringrin

<wails> i've killed the thread for tonight!

sad i found a lump on the edge of my cervix - i had a small one for ages and docs siad there was nothing to wrory about but now it's got bigger. lots bigger.
fk fk fk fkf kfkf

lilacisinlove Sat 05-Mar-11 07:56:07

oh aurora...get yourself looked at. Hope it turns out to be nothing to worry about. (((aurora)))

Snapespeare Sat 05-Mar-11 08:46:39


i am DL on FB.

hello weekend! hope some of you have nice things planned!

thnaks lilac and snape - i told vimes earlier today, he was really good and when i went quiet and sighed later he knew what i was thinking and tlaked to me about it so that was good - judst what i needed. have to wait til monday to book appointment now, will let you know how i get on.

snape's whose (?) fb are you on? blush now i remember who you are sorry snape grin

which album is train man in snape?grin

Snapespeare Sat 05-Mar-11 18:36:09

none! (not daft! don't want my regular-pals to know i'm a crazed stalker!)

drop me a message on fb and i'll send you a private view(!)

elastamum Sat 05-Mar-11 19:52:52

Hi to all, hope you have all had a good day

Have just got back from a day climbing with DS2, who qualified for the national finals in his age group. Am very proud smile

Traveller turned up first thing and stayed to watch and chat for a couple of hours before pushing off. Dont really know what to make of that, although expect MILY will be along later to give me a lecture about wasting my time with the wrong man grin Expect to be seeing quite a bit of him over the next few months though as DS2 is being coached there. am sort of hoping it will just develop as friends, he hasnt changed a bit from last year.

Have had lots of lovely txts from GW. Am going to invite him to dinner, although not sure how far i want to take things as he is still living with ex. All very complicated confused

elasta's ds2 - congratulations smile
elasta - please stay away from gw, if he is still living with his ex, you don't know exactly what the living bedroom arrangements are, i don't want you to get hurt ((())) and same with traveller, just be friends biscuit

snape - will do lol

boxingHelena Sat 05-Mar-11 22:16:25

good evening everybody
a little bird has told me that some poster on the FIT leave in south east lnd
if you can/want, can you give us a shout grin

boxingHelena Sat 05-Mar-11 22:16:45


not me sorry, i'm opposite side grin
hi helena smile

boxingHelena Sat 05-Mar-11 22:46:48

hi aurora smile
have I read correctly? Did Snape really take a picture of Train Man?

yes i think so grin

Flame Sun 06-Mar-11 14:13:55


GW worries me too with his living arrangements, but it could all be fine. Can you go round there? That would clear it up a bit tbh.

Have had an awesome weekend and trying desperately not to fall for Smurf. Went round on Friday night after a meal out with MNers, had half plans with Carrot for Sat afternoon but he didn't call me, so I didn't bother either. Psycho came to pick me up early evening so I could grab my car, and I went back until I had to leave to collect the kids today. Was meant to be seeing friends last night. I am a terrible friend when a naked man is on offer blush. He said he wouldn't ask me to stay for the evening as my friends would hate him, but if I chose to then he wouldn't kick me out wink. It is easy and fun. Def seeing him again Thurs, probably some other random time during the week too.

Snapespeare Sun 06-Mar-11 14:19:54

flame @ smurf!

helena blush blush blush .....maybe.... blush

i had a (completely above board and fully-clothed) dream about trainman last night, in which his name was Christopher.

a Platonic Man-less weekend. i miss him. but i'm watching 'being human' now and lusting after Mitchell, so diversionary tactics! wink

Hatesponge Sun 06-Mar-11 14:21:59

oooh Mitchell....the one man I would totally break my 'no men with long hair' rule for grin

Flame Sun 06-Mar-11 14:33:24

We spent Sat in pubs and shooting things in his flat with an air rifle. So different to my usual types

lou33 Sun 06-Mar-11 18:56:27

cor i have missed loads!

how is everyone?

dora has made great progress, and aside from a massive healing wound on her belly and still looking a bit skinny, she is almost acting like nothing ever happened

she woke up dp this morning by standing on his chest, putting a paw on his face, then dropping a toy on him to throw for her to play with, lol

i took her back to the emergency vet today because i had to give them an insurance claim form, and thought it would be nice to show them how well she is doing

the vets who admitted her and operated on her werent on duty, but the receptionist was, and she was delighted to see how much better she looked, made a big fuss of her and gave her a tiny dog treat

she said it was great to see her, as they dont usually hear how the animals get on, just see the sad poorly ones

eddie is ok as well

my life atm has been consumed by sick dogs and their complicated timetable of medication, so dont have anything else to add for now

elastamum Sun 06-Mar-11 22:42:30

Oh Lou, so pleased to hear that both Dora and Edie are doing well. You really have been through it lately. hi to everyone else smile

Have had a really busy weekend. Piantballing for DS1's b'day today. Both boys all really happy and tired tonight. have spend the last hour doing school uniform - lucky me..

Have had nice e mail from GW. Am trying to find time to see him again, but not easy unless he comes to stay as he is so far away.

Will be seeing traveller anyway next couple of weeks, but have decided that he will make a much better friend than a BF. Ironically the kids really like him, especially DS2, as he is a climber and happy to talk climbing with him and give him some help. How great is that. I meet a man who I can now see is unlikely ever to make a BF. He happens by chance to meet my kids and they get on really well. Thats the story of my life grin

lilacisinlove Sun 06-Mar-11 23:35:25

Hello all

Will try not to miss anyone out...

elasta, great news re Mr GW. Agree that traveller is not bf material but should definitely be used as free climbing instructor. Well done to your little one too Also, as someone who spent over a year living with exH after separation, I urge you not to rule him out simply on that basis.

lou...good dog news, hope this week brings less drama.

flame...sounds like an interesting evening. What have you got planned for the next date?

aurora...hoping for a quick appt and good news at the drs.

snape...looking forward to the next train man instalment. I'm almost tempted to join FB just so I can sneak a look!

mily, any more dress news?

tookool, where have you been all weekend?

sponge...grrr at ex. Twat. What about your imminent date?

eve, how was your date on Saturday?

Hello ninah, flf, sin and anyone else I've missed (sorry!)

Mad weekend here, at union meeting all day Sat and had to speak in front of 150 people using a microphone in huge conference room shock. Out from 9am to 8pm by the time I had also picked DD1 up from school. Have been glued to my laptop and dining room table today, getting mid-term assessments, planning folder and next week's (ok, I admit it, I only got as far as tomorrow lunchtime blush) lessons ready. TLOML was up north this weekend and had a lovely time with his DD. Apparently he showed her the picture of himself and me on his phone and said 'Who's that?' pointing at himself - 'Daddy', she said. 'Who's that?' pointing at me - 'Mummy', she said confused Is it a two year old thing where all men are Daddy and all women are Mummy?!!

Have a good week

lilacisinlove Sun 06-Mar-11 23:35:57

Hello all

Will try not to miss anyone out...

elasta, great news re Mr GW. Agree that traveller is not bf material but should definitely be used as free climbing instructor. Well done to your little one too Also, as someone who spent over a year living with exH after separation, I urge you not to rule him out simply on that basis.

lou...good dog news, hope this week brings less drama.

flame...sounds like an interesting evening. What have you got planned for the next date?

aurora...hoping for a quick appt and good news at the drs.

snape...looking forward to the next train man instalment. I'm almost tempted to join FB just so I can sneak a look!

mily, any more dress news?

tookool, where have you been all weekend?

sponge...grrr at ex. Twat. What about your imminent date?

eve, how was your date on Saturday?

Hello ninah, flf, sin and anyone else I've missed (sorry!)

Mad weekend here, at union meeting all day Sat and had to speak in front of 150 people using a microphone in huge conference room shock. Out from 9am to 8pm by the time I had also picked DD1 up from school. Have been glued to my laptop and dining room table today, getting mid-term assessments, planning folder and next week's (ok, I admit it, I only got as far as tomorrow lunchtime blush) lessons ready. TLOML was up north this weekend and had a lovely time with his DD. Apparently he showed her the picture of himself and me on his phone and said 'Who's that?' pointing at himself - 'Daddy', she said. 'Who's that?' pointing at me - 'Mummy', she said confused Is it a two year old thing where all men are Daddy and all women are Mummy?!!

Have a good week

lilacisinlove Sun 06-Mar-11 23:37:01

grrr...said it was offline then posted it twice!!

Oh well, not the first time I've repeated myself and it won't be the last either.

I promise I'm not trying to fill the thread so I can start the new one again!

tookoolforskool Mon 07-Mar-11 07:42:51

yay lou. glad that dora is on the mend, thats really fab.

flame - sounds like its going really well. congrats.

sponge - did you have a date this weekend in the end?

snape - train man???

Had a bit of a revelation this weekend and have taken my profile off all dating sites. I cannot be arsed, not one little bit. I had a lovely weekend with DD, and ive got the joy of 6 more of them.. will no interuptions.. i dont want to organise babysitters... plus i want to get the house totally spring cleaned and the garden sorted nice and early.
I realised i was looking for excuses to get out of next tuesdays date, and i was going to go, more because i felt that i should, than i wanted to, if that makes any sense at all. So, profile gone, poof!

I did give my email address to one guy, who ive been chatting on and off to for a while... but ive told him im not dating for the next 6 weeks or so... we spent a good few hours on msn last night.. but we shall see.

AND, and heres the killer. Mr Big does, 100% have a girlfriend, which is what i suspected. Only saturday he was talking about us meeting up and sorting it all out. Its just wrong. The whole thing is just wrong. I cannot decide if i should have a go at him and tell him its totally inappropiate to talk to me like he had been when he has a girlfriend, and that if i were her id be fuming...
to just leave it, say nothing and just dont talk to him. again. ever.

So, date free... and that way for a while.. and bloody happy about that fact

tookoolforskool Mon 07-Mar-11 09:18:21

actually. Thinking on the drive to work. Im just not going to say anything and being honest, what can i say. We arent together... its his choice. Howvever, i do think its a perfect example of why i shouldnt be with him. If he thinks being with a girlfriend while telling somone else you love them is acceptable... yeah.. thats just not on, and i dont want to be part of that anymore.

So, the plan is, quietly go, when he contacts me, which he will do, and i predict about 2 weeks tops, i shall just tell him that its no longer something i want.

good plan?

and can i still be part of this thread, even though im on a dating strike?

Flame Mon 07-Mar-11 13:13:12

Sounds like a good plan to me.

And yes, you'd better not sod off just because you're not dating. <remembers that I was giving up men for Feb... blush>

elastamum Mon 07-Mar-11 13:21:03

Know where you are coming from TK. I have come to the conclusion that dating doesnt really make me any happier. I toook my profiles down a couple of weeks ago as the house is up for sale and we might be moving so didnt seem much point.

So at the moment its GW - next date this weekend and possibly the odd coffee with traveller. If all that goes tits up am just going to give up until I sort the rest of my life out. Wont give up this thread though grin

hello everyone i have an appointment for thursday at 12:40 <gulp> but at least it will hopefully be sorted out and i can stop stressing.

though on the other hand, we move into new house in less than 3 weeks. received contracts today. i phoned the social fund to check on progress of loan application and guess what??? they haven't received the form back yet <erk> if they'd printed on the lousy form originally that they wanted a breakdown of what i needed the money for, i would've had it by now and be completely stress-free!!!

Snapespeare Mon 07-Mar-11 18:35:43

aurora - good do check in with us before you go, so we can wish you well. x

Took. Bloody buggery Mr B. git. i am absolutely outraged on your behalf. truly. I have my OKC profile up at the moment, sod knows why. you'll have a brilliant six weeks with mini, though. lots of cake baking.

I'm not sleeping well. worried about the house situation and my DD - although I think a lot of this is 2nd hand from the ex and he projects guilt all over the place. she doesn't seem too perturbed.

oh! ex started a job today. his first in seven years! <faints!> clearly his outgoings once working take precedence over mine <hisses, ineffectually>

no train man today. very sensible of him! I'm off to a fancy-schmancy international womens day event tomorrow (at a 5 star hotel on bond street, lunch included...where we can discuss an international perspective of the suffering of women in the developing world....and the capsule wardrobe... hmm) so i'll be in a frock/power suit tomorrow. poor train man.

ignoring PM in solidarity with took got in to email from him this morning, where he suggested we act-out/read through the breakup scene we are currently writing for the screen play. I'm pretty sure that involves make-up sex, right!? just in the context ofwriting from an honest perspective... everything for my art!!

Flame Mon 07-Mar-11 19:07:41

Oh ffs paranoia has kicked in. I am obsessing and convinced he hates me. Why do I do this?

Flame Mon 07-Mar-11 20:00:44

So seemed fine yesterday. Hasn't said a word to me all day, not even scrabble or the obsessive poking war. I don't think i can be doing with this emotions thing. I have clearly been reading it all wrong

Flame Mon 07-Mar-11 20:39:02

blush Phone dead.

Flame Mon 07-Mar-11 20:54:41

(sorry - entirely self centred today blush)

lilacisinlove Mon 07-Mar-11 21:44:29

flame, you can be your own worst enemy! Mind you, I did something similar on Sat, mine was dead by 9.30am and I was out til 8pm. TLOML said it was the first time he had ever been worried about me (usually I don't give him a moment's peace so he doesn't get time! grin )

tookoolforskool Mon 07-Mar-11 21:58:54

cheers snape. though really i cant be outraged can i?
i have no reason to be outraged...
even though just sat he told me he loved me and wanted to be with me.
Just confirms ive made the right choice, and despite everything its time to move on ( which i decided in jan)

Please remind me of this fact in a few days time!!

HOW can pm want you to go through that sceen..... infuriating. gggrrr. of course...do it!!! lol.
at lack of train man.

flame - hes probaby just out. or busy.

aurro - gggrr. bloody stressful. hope you get it sorted.

elasta - hope gw works out though.. or are you not really feeling it?

beaitician - hows you? been quite the last few days.

Hatesponge Mon 07-Mar-11 22:34:34

hello all...

so will start with the good news, another 4lb off at the weigh in this week, which given my massive curry and wine binge on friday isnt actually that bad grin

date for sat didnt happen, he went a bit flouncy beforehand and pissed me off - doesnt take much - so I decided to ignore him and not arrange it blush

meant to be seeing the nice one this fri but he has postponed til next fri as he can't find anyone to have his DC. Am prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt I think - what's the consensus? He was v apologetic and did say he really wants to meet....and I'm the awkward one who can only meet on fri's!

so we'll see.

work is not good, all to do with end of year reports etc, will be having lots of rows meetings over it this week I expect.

and Ex is being his usual pain in the arse self. Last week I found out he was telling the children that I was a shit parent, and that I expected too much of them. Today he text me saying I am not to leave either of the boys at home without me ever as it is not appropriate hmm and how I should inform him what arrangements I make to ensure this doesnt happen.

I replied and said whilst the children are in my care its none of his business. That appears to have shut him up for now. I was tempted to say that once he starts putting his hand in his pocket (rather than leaving me to pay all the bills plus his £40k of debt) then he'll be in a position to dictate what does or doesnt happen. But I thought that might be a little inflammatory grin

Snapespeare Tue 08-Mar-11 17:46:57

it was a train-man day! i studiously ignored him, although sitting opposite him, to throw him off the scent! :D

horrible international womens day corporate do with a load of well-heeled succesful business women, feel utterly exhausted and ill, due to far too much caffeine and lack of sleep - going to have a very relaxing evening - bath, camomile tea and an early night. done in.

lou33 Tue 08-Mar-11 21:35:05

evening, if anyone who isnt on my fb wants to see the latest pics of dora and eddie, i have just put some on my mn profile

dora's one was taken this afternoon, and eddies a couple of days ago

hope you are all well

elastamum Tue 08-Mar-11 22:07:52

Ohh Lou, I love your pics, you are a good looking lot, you the kids and the dogs!! grin Pleased to see both Dora and Eddie looking better.

My dog1 is in the vet on thur for an operation to repair her knee. Have my fingers crossed for her. she is really lame ATM sad

Quiet day here. Another message from GW, he is coming up for the day and staying for dinner on Sat wink

lou33 Wed 09-Mar-11 12:22:07

Thank you elasta. Hope it goes well on thurs

boxingHelena Wed 09-Mar-11 12:25:11

hi hi

Aurora did you have your check up?

SparklyMily Wed 09-Mar-11 15:02:01

hey everyone, sorry have been a bit quiet

Loving the dogs Lou, they look great, after all that trauma so glad they are recovering so well

Elasta, great to hear it's going well with GW and I promise no finger-wagging over Traveller grin, just reallty glad you are enjoying yourself. Hope the op goes ok for your pooch

Snape, I will ping you on FB so I can belatedly see the pic of TM, glad he truned up again this morning. I did pmsl at your description of 'stealthsnape' grin

Took, I will happily remind you about Big

Great news on the continued weightloss Sponge, ggrrrrrangry at XP though...

Hello everyone else

No news here, domestic bliss I am afraid (DD2 is being a stroppy madam but I won't bore you with that!)

Have stopped surfing for dresses, am saving my energies for a shopping trip yet to be arranged, want to do some RL swishing in front of mirrors grin

elastamum Wed 09-Mar-11 15:15:03

Hi to MILY, Men really are like buses here.

GW has beeen messaging me, and I had a call from traveller this morning to catch up after the weekend. Said he will see me next week when I am up there with DS2. Typical, havent seen him for 6 months then he pops up again just after I have met someone else. confused

Flame Wed 09-Mar-11 17:03:32

I give up. The man blows hot and cold on me so much. I have no idea where I stand. Haven't bothered contacting him today, if he is interested then he can contact me, but I can't cope with this pissing about.

boxingHelena Wed 09-Mar-11 17:09:03

Flame are you talking about Smurf?

Flame Wed 09-Mar-11 17:23:19

Yeah, sorry. A bit all over the place today. One of the baby bunnies died (not my bunny but much cuddling has been done), my mum's dog doesn't look like he will make the week (old age), XH is muttering about moving to sodding Wales, and Smurf has been decidedly odd and quiet since Sunday despite being absolutely fine and talking about when he was next seeing me when I left him.

I have no clue what is up and I am tired of caring and being hurt tbh.

Snapespeare Wed 09-Mar-11 19:29:04

oh, flame. god rest you merry babybunny. so sad when pets are unwell, even if they're not yours, they're just little-lives thatyou want to protect. I can't stand anyone intentionally being cruel to animals. DS2 is still traumatised about the time he accidentally flicked a caterpillar from his leg into a camp fire blush

still feeling a bit unwell, heart has been racing since yesterday - am def giving up the ciggies again, makes mem want to vomit. being physically unwell always makes me feel emotionally low. I start in on a huge big 'no-one will ever touch me again' thing. stupid head-tape!

took, hope all well with the abstinance! Aurora, how are things?

TM this morning - platform was nuts, and there was a change for the second train, the one i normally get to ensure a seat. TM stayed on the original platform, but after i'd secured a seat on departing train, watched me trundle away. There was eye contact!

getting the tube tomorrow, as going north for a day for work am fully aware he gets the vict line. (might have accidentally ended up on same tube platform as him yesterday blush hmm stealth-snape, comedy-tiptoeing....

Flame Wed 09-Mar-11 19:51:22

Ok, have sent him a message asking if we're still on for tomorrow. Horrible feeling I will just get no response. wtf happened?

Yay for eye contact

tookoolforskool Wed 09-Mar-11 20:11:58

ooohh. good luck with the comedy tiptoe-ing.
and good luck with the stopping smoking. we all get a bit like that the 'huge, no one will ever touch me thing' from time to time. it will pass....

im doing very well. still no talking to mr big
if i think about it i get very pissed off. not because hes seeing someone. like i said, i cant be angry about that, not really. But because he lied about it. He should have told me. And becuase its just not on to tell someone you love them, when you are with someone else. Its just not on at all.

Flame, sorry about the bunnys... and i hope he texts you back.

mily - shopping trip sounds fab....

and elasta. men are indeed like busses!!!

anyway, had a weird text today from someone i had one drink with in the summer. wtf is wrong with men.
if i didnt want to see him for a second date then... why on earth would i want to 9 or so months later...
and did i tell you that policeman still texts about once a week.
why do they think i will change my mind.

on the plus side DD wrote me a note today. first one ive ever got, she only started school in jan. She wrote ' i like mummy, love ( her name). I didnt even know she could spell those things.. i accused her of copying.. but she had nothing to copy from.
bless her heart.

place marking as the search thingy keeps saying there aren't any messages for me hmm

from me i should've said!grin

i've had a quick read through and promtply forgotten it, am very sorry blush

well, the budgeting loan still hasn't come through but guess what? they now want payment for a previous loan that i thought i'd already paid! bloody typical so now won't be able to get full amount i needed. gd has said that i can borrow some money off him if i ever needed it but it doesn't feel right though i might have to sad

vimes also agreed with my suggestion that i visit the credit union in my town to see what they suggest - tho i am a bit concerned as i don't want to be charged exhorbitant/extortionate repayment rates.

well it's d-day today for my appointment, i'm not here (vimes' home) tonight though i will be tomorrow, i will try posting an update when i've taken dd to her ballet class (thank god her dad pays for that!)

bye for now

smile minitook

elastamum Thu 10-Mar-11 09:19:52

Fingers crossed for you aurora. smile

thank you elasta smile i can't cry anyway because my liquid eyeliner is not waterproof grin

elastamum Thu 10-Mar-11 10:50:34

Well i have had some interesting news today. Have just got some blood test results from the docs and I am officially post menopausal confused at 47!!

Well thats that out of the way - do I still qualify to be on this thread??

confused for elasta
of course you do, elasta grin

well, i've been to docs. she ( was lovely by the way) said she coudl see what i was concerned about and said it looked like a 'cystic lesion'(?) but is referring me to local gynae clinic to check properly. i do want a biopsy taken in view of my own personal and family history, i don't like the word 'cyst' (purely from having heard it about less than a year before mom died of oc)sad but i'll keep my fingers crossed it is just that

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 16:32:52

how long for the gynae appointment?

I managed to fck things up. Things weren't a problem before as far as I can tell, but now that I have come across as an irrational stalker they are. wtf is wrong with me? Why do I have no off switch!?!? I feel like I deliberately sabotaged it.

i don't know yet flame.

why do you think you have messed thigns up? i will post mroe tomorrow, dd's clas si finishing soon so i should be going. hope you're ok

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 16:41:12

I didn't hear back all evening about tonight, so I sent a message saying something along the lines of I can take a hint, but if he ever fancies letting me in on what happened since the weekend then to feel free. He replied with "I was at my mum's you spooner" (well "sooner" but I think that was what he was aiming at). I explained that he is impossible to read and I have no idea if he likes me or not, plus this week being nuts has led to overthinking etc. Have heard nothing since then.

I am so pissed off with myself. There was no issue, until I created one. It could be that I magically hear from him later, but doubtful. I've got his birthday present in the car too which is annoying - I think I will move into full on stalker territory if I drop that in!

Snapespeare Thu 10-Mar-11 19:08:59

aurora - fingers crossed for you. I had a dodgy smear a few years ago and had to go and have a <can't recall what it's called! I've blocked it out!> fanny-crocodile camera thing. all well, but i have annual smears. do hope you'll be fine - just keep repeating, 'just a cyst! just a cyst!'

elasta - oh! hurry up menopause! I have no need for fertility! my(moon) cup runneth over.

took - still off the Mr B wagon? I was trying really hard this week - have only initiated texts mith PM twice. thats pretty good going for me.

train man update? I was in Nottingham today, managed to get on a very crowded train, which he declined to take(!) but had to carry on to st panks this morning, so went and bought DW magazine at the station and followed him down the underground. managed to stop and wait a wee way before him, kinda next carriage distance, so it didn't look too obvious hmm didn't get the first train, got the second and he got in my carriage. being all nonchalant, not sure where he left the train, but it was before me.

how long can this actually go on!? ridiculous! i'm clearly not going to do anything. he's clearly not going to do anything...i'll be reporting in on train man for the next three years with NO movement at allllll.. woe!

tookoolforskool Thu 10-Mar-11 19:42:23

told you . you need to go with the slipping a note into his bag.just put ' call me... from train woman' and your number, of course.
very romantic AND an excellent story
well done on the PM front as well. How much has he contacted you?
Ive STILL had no contact with mr b, which takes it to 5 days now. Im doing well.. and ive not cyber stalked ( far too easy when he has his own websites) him nearly half as much.

Aurora. hoping its all ok. Ive had the biggest cyst ever. It was 10lbs in weight.. and was only found by chance when they were cutting abnormal cells of my cervix, which they couldnt do under local as im strangely and typically the one in god knows what that has a highly senstive and un numbal cervix.
great. Anyway. i know what its like.... just, thinking of you.....

elasta. how do you feel about that??

Flame... only you know why you do that?
have you spoken to him yet?

i told buddist i was cancelling out date, and explained why ( lack of childcare...) and gave him my email. he sent me a really nice email saying of course he understood.. and if i wanted to he was keen to meet up when im free. its a long wait ( all of 6 weeks...) but if hes free i will take him up on his offer.

also chatting to the one i gave my msn too.... but again. i am not meeting anyone for the next 6 weeks. and i feel really good about that.

Snapespeare Thu 10-Mar-11 20:12:09

I had a friend who had a cyst - grapefruit sized. she collapsed in the supermarket on xmas/new years eve and her turd of a bf didn't even visit her in hospital. I miss her - i moved away and have no idea where she might be ( but i live near where her mum lived, so i could knock on her door-type thing..

oh. god. it'll end up being the fucking awful note sceanrio then rejection, then having to get to the train insanely early, for the rest of my LIFE, so i can run down the platform to avoid. it would really be so much easier if i could be drunk at ten to eight in the morning. not knowing is better than rejection.

DS2 is singing 'halo'in the shower. and 'oops i did it again'. grin

Snapespeare Thu 10-Mar-11 20:16:04

sorry! how do you actually 'slip a note into someones bag' without them thinking you're trying to nick your stuff and some bloody train based do-gooder grabbing your hand, holding it straight up in the air and yeling, 'this woman is trying to steal your sandwiches!!!'

...complicated times.

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 20:22:50


So, being a total lunatic I dropped in a card and present (literally - through post box). Have got back to him sending me a message apologising for being hell and says family stuff is going down. Have I seriously NOT screwed this up?

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 20:23:13

(will catch up on the rest in a min when stunnedness wears off)

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 21:10:01

Snape - go knock on the door.

The note will be fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine. (says me who still does girly sniggering when I have to go for coffee where I left my number for cute beardy bloke blush)

We seem to be back to normal shock He is sorting his stuff out, am leaving ball in his court.

Hi all

just place marking ....

and elasta - dont' believe everything docs say about being menopausal - I was told I was - and had two rounds of fsh tests that put me as post- not even perimenopausal - six months later I was pg with twins so wouldn't chuck out your contraception just yet ...

and sponge - fantastic news re weight loss! Though grrrrrrr at arsehole ex

Aurora - how did it go?

Snape - second (third?, fourth?) putting note in bag ... what is the worst that can happen after all?

tookoolforskool Thu 10-Mar-11 21:19:08

ah snape.. yeah. go knock on her mums door. its so easy to lose touch with people isnt it... i know what thats like, ( have moved lots)
mine was football sized. The couldnt believe i wasnt doubled over in pain. in fact, you could feel it through my stomach.. but i just thought it was a bit of tummy.. you know, you kind of dont think that do you.

i have no idea on the note thing. what about bluetooth.. can you scan phones? or do some link up thing via iphone?

or drop a note as you walk past him.. ah. that could work. something important sounding... with your number on it......
or just ' train man. i want to sit on your lap. call me now'

maybe less embarassing that a note in bag situation.

Flame Thu 10-Mar-11 21:37:10

OOOooh i like the idea of bluetooth

Snapespeare Fri 11-Mar-11 07:21:40

ooh! bluetooth! genius! offto the station. again...

snape grin just say hello!!!

thansk everyone smile
'just a cyst. just a cyst. just a cyst. just a cyst <repeats ad infinitum............................>

Snapespeare Fri 11-Mar-11 12:50:58

just a cyst! just a cyst! Just a cyst!

No train man this morning! i dunno, you lot get me all hyped up and then.....nothing! nada! zilch! wink grin

sorry grin

please talk sense into me. vimes has said that hewon't buy flowers cos they're too expensive, yet (now he's started smoking again) he can afford 6.25 for a packet of 20 fags!!!

Flame Fri 11-Mar-11 14:49:38

I got a photo from Mattarse last night. <gazes wistfully> Alas, he has morals and won't do anything with me with Smurf on the scene.

Ok, I have morals too but alcohol and pretty photos were very persuasive.

No train guy booooooo

lilacisinlove Fri 11-Mar-11 17:04:26

snape, loving the train man updates

flame, don't give up hope yet.

aurora, cigs are addictive, flowers aren't. Does that help?

Taking TLOML to school quiz night tonight, therefore flaunting my love life in front of the parents of kids I teach blush

Massive cheer and round of applause please...DD1, age 13, found out today that she got an A* in her GCSE maths mock exam she sat on Monday <extremely proud mum of amazing DD emoticon>

lilac's dd - congratulations grin

lilac - yes it does, which i know anyway though when he puts it down tomoney as a reason for not buying me any then buys thigns off ebay for both of us <stamps foot childishly> grin

flame who's smurf?!!!

Snapespeare Fri 11-Mar-11 18:13:30

whooh! got home to a cheque for £70 and my passport is ready, so i'm away to Warsaw for work next week (thank you paternal grandparents!)to be driven around in a british embassy car for a couple of days.

feel a bit more important now!

Flame Fri 11-Mar-11 19:15:17

You've missed Smurf? Smurf has been the past month, well started talking a month ago, met him 3 weeks ago. Been out a couple of times, been "in" much more blush. Starting to fall for him, but not really sure how he feels about me - when we are together he is very much "in it" iyswim, but when we are apart he is a nightmare and so jokey that it is hard to tell. Picture Barney from how i met your mother for his personality (if that is any help to any of you), but without the hordes of women. Thought he was off with me all week, but it turns out it was family stuff, which obv he now won't go into as he did the same with everything and deflected with a joke. He tends to open up more in person, so hoping I will get to see him over the weekend - dunno though, he wants to go be angry for a bit.

blush have ahd a lot on my mind lately sorry flame.
yes i 'know' who barney is. heop fully you'll get to see him smile

6months for me and vimes tomorrow smile

Flame Fri 11-Mar-11 19:27:22

Lol it was more that I feel like I spend my time whinging on here lots so you must all be sick of my people wink

6 months really?!

yep smile

he's not one for dates tho lol
he's at work from 8 til 4 so i'm the ormantic one and cooking him a meal - he always cooks for me even when he's been at work all day

as in remembering 'important' ones lol

6 months today smilesmilesmilesmile

lilacisinlove Sat 12-Mar-11 09:23:54

Happy anniversary aurora and vimes smile

Where's that daffodil gone? I was going to give you a bouquet!

Flame Sat 12-Mar-11 09:24:22

yay aurora

I have to take my mum to get her dog put down today. Smurf still being odd. i give up. I can't be doing with games today. I just want someone to go for a drink with.

Flame Sat 12-Mar-11 10:09:11

Fabulous. For some reason my income support hasn't gone in.

tookoolforskool Sat 12-Mar-11 10:40:58

happy anniversay aurora

Sorry flame, today isnt going to be a good day., thinking of you and your mum.

Have reached the not spoken to mr big for one week milestone. go me!

Pub quiz was most excellent fun. AND at the half way mark we were winning. ( so fuck you mr knob at the other table making the sarky comment that we must watch a lot of tv because we got the logos and strap lines round 100%..... we kicked your arse on all rounds.. and you have poor taste in clothes. a football shirt does not look good...)
anyway, i digress. There is the most lovely man/boy there. We went there as a work thing at xmas and i noticed him then, and then we have been for a few lunches... and seen him then.. and he was there tonight.. and he did come over when i was talking to the landlady and he did this whole hands reaching up on the top of the bar stretch thing and i saw his pants!! ( could not help but look)
But every time im there its with work. and hes working there... so we havent said more than hi and thanks.. or do you want ice...
There is a classic car rally and bbq soon which im going to go to. And probably mothers day lunch. And a vehicle rally, if you can get in it, or on it, bring it. i may go with a space hopper.

But how on earth do i get to talk to him when hes actually working.. i can only hope going along to one of he more fun things.

plus i have no idea how old he is and im suspecting early 20's ish???? and im not early 20's so im probably just insane and lusting after some bright young thing...

Hes all messy longish dark hair and stubble. Swoon.

i suspect he is always there. i think he might be the landladys son????

i need a plan ladies

tookoolforskool Sat 12-Mar-11 10:50:11

to those on my facebook you can view mr pub boy if you follow the link to the pub ive just put up
then look under food
xmas menu
and his pic is the bottom one.. green jumper.

hes too young isnt he? and too attractive.
though that pic is about 2 years old.. and hes got his eyes closed.


no chance.

Snapespeare Sat 12-Mar-11 11:04:11

i am reimagining him with longer hair and stubble. mmm! i think you would need to choose a quiet time and go in to 'meet' an imaginary someone and get stood-up...<devious emoticon> then look at your watch a lot and roll your eyes.

well done on the week! I've managed since wednesday with PM. this is an inordinatlely long period of time that will mean fuck-all to him. for me, it's like an ocean!

happy anniversary aurora and vimes. x!

tookoolforskool Sat 12-Mar-11 11:21:09

A good plan ... the problem with this pub though is it really is in the middle of knowwhere. It's hardly even on a road.. its just the.pub and then meadows and fields...
And its tiny.. only fits 46 people in at a push...

Though I do sort of know the landlady now I could go talk to her... and then hope he comes to talk..

And just keep going to things there?

How old do we think he is?

Well done on the no pm contact... has he not even text? Hmmm. Leave it and see how long it takes him...... I'd bet about 2 weeks.

Snapespeare Sat 12-Mar-11 11:39:30

we were texting on wednesday, 2 weeks would be about right. am even studiously avoiding him on fb. weekends are weird without him though.

he looks mid twenties. thats clearly doable allowable.

Flame Sat 12-Mar-11 11:50:08

Not a clue on starting things up.

My mate is trying to keep the faith w/r smurf. I dunno. I think I am too used to being let down tbh so just assume he has gone off me. She has given me firm instructions to stay away from Mattsarse though until I am completely sure it is over with smurf.

Well done on the no PM or MrBig contact. I, on the other hand, have text Carrot asking if he can see me tonight blush. I really don't want to spend the evening alone.

tookoolforskool Sat 12-Mar-11 11:58:27

ah. mid 20's and that pic is 2 years old for sure. or at least 18 months.. wasnt xmas just gone.. because it was on the website for the xmas just gone.

28 maybe

thats ok

snape - im sure its poo. Bet you two weeks. tops.
I actually dont feel that bad. but i think its been drifiting since xfter xmas. ive not felt as strongly since then. its easier...

i just brought a petrol lawnmower on ebay. im very excited about this. clearly i need to get out more.

sincitylover Sat 12-Mar-11 17:57:35

place marking

tk - I know that pub smile

not much to report

need a catch-up

tookoolforskool Sat 12-Mar-11 18:13:55

You do? Does that mean you also know mr pub boy? Your going to tell me he's not single, or horrible, or gay or something aren't you?

sincitylover Sat 12-Mar-11 18:15:15

No don't worry - haven't been there for ages.

lou33 Sat 12-Mar-11 20:20:22


placemarking, i havent had a chance to read the thread properly, i have been immersed in transforming my bedroom

hope everyone is ok

Flame Sat 12-Mar-11 23:06:33

Spent the evening with psychomum. Vets was horrible but really really well handled iyswim. dd1 keeps sobbing about it.

Had a few messages from Smurf. Told my mate the full story with his stuff which i Obv can't on here, and writing it down make me realise just how self absorbed and paranoid I've been. He is dealing with a lot and needs the space. Just sending random messages so he knows i am thinking of him. Told him I am worrying earlier (had been even quieter) and he's been with a mate so i am happier he's not alone.

and once again repeat to self... must not fall for blue men... clearly its not already happening or anything...

Hatesponge Sat 12-Mar-11 23:11:50

flame re vets, and poor DD.

I think next week's date has disappeared. After previously emailing several times a day, then was only once a day, now nothing since Thurs night. Oh well, back to the drawing board.....

place marking again

flame - am so sorry about your mum's dog sad

thank you everyone for anniversary wishes, lol thnaks for the daffodil bouquet lilac - vimes got me a chocolate sheep - the aero one. no flowers though. the best thing he could've given me was what he said on friday, he's going to try cutting down on the cigarettes - yay!! i think the coughing (not forced but completely natural!) every time he came near me - i have asthma and cigarette smoke really irritates it) i couldn't help it but it was horrible. so yay for vimes grin


elastamum Sun 13-Mar-11 18:07:33

hi all, Well I almost cant belive how good this weekend has been.

GW came up on sat, arrived bringing chocolates and flowers. Rather unfortunately at the same time ex came to pick up kids stuff. Bit blush but they shook hands and were almost chatty! Then stupid ex decided all by himself to bring the boys back from school to mine to change before heading off, so they met him too!! Not really what I had planned, so I will now have to explain to them who he is. Ex has since apologised and said kids didnt bat an eyelid. Well done ex hmm

Went walking in the peaks, curry for dinner and then fabulous romantic evening. He left this morning, both of us really happy and smiley. We are going to arrange our next weekend for when I dont have kids next.

He txt me on his way home to say he thought this weekend was perfect. He is the first man I have dated where I just feel so comfortable and relaxed. He is fab. Am smile

lilacisinlove Sun 13-Mar-11 20:42:56

elasta, delighted for you! Comfortable and relaxed is the order of the day for me and TLOML, so that's definitely a good sign . Am hmm at your ex though!

elastamum Sun 13-Mar-11 21:28:16

Ex apologised. Said that he thought we would have gone out by the time he got back with the kids. We had quite a good chat when he dropped off this evening and cleared the air on a few things. In a funny sort of way I think he was pleased at last to see there was another man on the scene. I think deep down he still feels guilty at leaving us

sincitylover Sun 13-Mar-11 22:40:28

elasta that's great news grin

dcs came back from 24 hr stay with exh with tales of woe. It's getting to crisis point again.

Ds2 said exh's p said she couldn't wait for them to go. Then exh didn't stay at the dcs sports practice which is prob for them the most important part of the weekend.

DS1 says that he is treated like a four year old - I really don't know what to do about it. I try to remain detached but otoh can't bear to see them so unhappy. I honestly don't think they say things to make me feel better IYKWIM. Unfortunately he seems to have met someone with an equally large stick up their backside. DS1 has to sleep on the floor when he is there too.

elasta that's really brilliant, i am so pleased for you smile i'm the same as lilac about your ex though.

sin sad (((((scl)))) how come ds1 doesn't have his own bed???

tookoolforskool Mon 14-Mar-11 09:46:11

elasta - sounds lovely.

Sin - why does he have to sleep on the floor? Thats quite frankly stupid. For a while my ex husband only lived in a one bed flat. When he had DD to stay he slept on an airbed in the living room and gave her his bed.

Had a lovely weekend I really made the right choice on the no dating front
Had a couple of texts from another few men this weekend which i have just ignored. 9 days since ive spoken to mr big

Still talking to that one on msn. I supose i shall have to give him a name... 'boatman'
hes actually interesting and i want to meet up. But im not breaking my non dating rule.. and he understands that.

Buddist also emailed me, ive not responded yet. He is actually ordained and has a buddist name.. which i didnt know before. Does anyone know anything about buddists? I have no clue.. and no clue if i should want to date one???

oh and sponge - well done on the weight loss.
Ive started a diet yesterday... have been eatiing way too many carbs.. and proably too much cheese.. and too much chocolate ;)

sincitylover Mon 14-Mar-11 10:26:46

he used to have the attic room but think it's now used for storage. He now sleeps on the lounge floor in a sleeping bag with built in mat thingie.

I will ask exh again. They're only there once a fortnight for one night at most. I really think his p needs to butt out - she probably feels though that she has to step in where exh is weak tbh. And of course it's her house. She also made comments to ds1 about why she thinks he gets detentions etc.

I think tbh she's overstepping the mark. Of course if I speak up I will be the bad guy again.

I really didn't anticipate things would be so difficult post divorce.

sincitylover Mon 14-Mar-11 10:30:18

Also I would be ok with them not going anymore as I'm exhausted with trying to make it work however from a purely selfish point of view that would leave me with no free time at all. I sometimes go and stay away overnight when they're away but that would have to stop.

I could still go out but would have to pay for babysitter as I do now if it's not once a fortnight on a saturday.

Going out last Thurs was a major effort - at least I shared the babysitter costs with my friend.

i understand that completely sin - dd's dad wants me to travel in the council-paid taxi to dd's new school with her hmm

tookoolforskool Mon 14-Mar-11 11:39:40

hmm. i think it would be fair to email your ex.. so you have something in writing and just say that your DS is really unhappy about sleeping on the floor in the living room, and is there something he could come up with?
and how hes not 4.. and is just generally upset and not wanting to spend time with him and that if DS keeps getting upset you are not going to force the issue.. and so DS may or may not be coming to stay overnight.

How old is DS?? can he say anything?

hopefully a bit of honest communication....???
or is that just not going to work?

sincitylover Mon 14-Mar-11 13:34:02

TK - everything goes in writing - so will be emailing him as when I or dcs challenge him about anything he just stonewalls.

sincitylover Mon 14-Mar-11 14:49:50

DS1 is 14 and DS2 9

Snapespeare Mon 14-Mar-11 19:00:22

very quick check in with all you lovelies...no TM today. bumped into utterly gorgeous downstairs neighbour yesterday on way in with boys. he is delightful. nothing would clearly ever happen there, but i might think about it a bit. in a (cough) personal moment. and he's a <whispers> fairly famous actor. <drifts off...>

Hatesponge Mon 14-Mar-11 20:22:06

Scl re your ex/DC situation. I can't believe he hasnt even got a bed for DS1 (although is on a par with my ex, boys sleep on floor/sofa when they go there).

Am feeling rather despondent(probably hormonal), partly that this weight loss is pointless as I will still be single (albeit thinner) and also that I've had my chance, and wasted it. Can't get a date with men I probably wouldn't look twice at in RL, let alone ones I might be interested in.

Hope there is still room for me on this thread though, even if I am just a miserable dateless spinster - I promise to try and cheer up.....

elastamum Mon 14-Mar-11 23:11:16

Oh sponge, chin up girl, it is probably the dieting thats getting you down. whenever I diet - or stop drinking for that matter - i get the blues. Think positive. Things will get better. smile

Have had lovely e mail from GW, almost cant believe it and expect any moment to wake up and get dumped or such like. We wont be seeing each other for about 10 days as he is overseas on business but we have a date in the diary for when he is back.

Think he is still fab and a great shag very romantic. By the time he returns I will be consumed with lust blush

place marking

(just had the wife of vimes' sarge sing the wedding march at me with her colleague blushgrin

sincitylover Tue 15-Mar-11 12:33:28

oh sponge things will get better - weightloss is good - maybe it's a bit like hitting the wall in the marathon.

Ive texted and emailed ex about the weekends and how they are not working out and as it stands they won't be going to stay overnight anymore alhtough they stil want to see him.

I suggested he talk to them about it to try to reach a solution. My dm doesn't agree with that saying they need an adult to stick up for them - well isn't that what Im doing - I hate to get involved in what goes on when they are with him.

I also suggested that maybe his p could back off in parent/discplinarian mode.

Also told him I couldn't stand back and let boys become distressed/ unhappy before and after they go over there.

So it's over to him now. I don't want to completely stop their visits as they do still want to see him. Just don't want to be part of a shiny new family I think.

The irony here is that when we together he would sneer at family life and parents (even though he was one)but now he's in the thick of it.

sincitylover Tue 15-Mar-11 13:57:38

my dm also said to me today 'if other people can find time to do the ironing why can't you?'

She has always had to criticise my domestic prowess.

sincitylover Tue 15-Mar-11 15:33:41

exh categorically denies that his p said what she said.

I have asked ds2 several times - surely he wouldn't invent it? Esp when he knew that exh was also present at the time.

garageflower Tue 15-Mar-11 17:03:44

Hello smile

Please can I join this thread? I have lurked for a while after discovering it. I am not a parent, but I am looking for the men confused

Flame Tue 15-Mar-11 18:49:46

Totally lost. Sorry.

elastamum Tue 15-Mar-11 20:25:00

Flame, are you OK?

Flame Tue 15-Mar-11 21:00:39

Yeah, I'm just reading and not taking in.

Smurf is still being confusing.

elastamum Tue 15-Mar-11 22:32:38

I was worried. Sounds like he is messing with your head...

Have had a good day. I had another really lovely message from GW last night, so this morning I plucked up courage and rang him on my way to work. Had a long chat and have been txting during the day. Am smitten - just hope it is going to last smile

sincitylover Tue 15-Mar-11 22:45:37

sorry flame - was it all my rantings about exh?

tookoolforskool Wed 16-Mar-11 09:25:56

Sin - My DD was coming back from her dads saying she wanted to bring toys back and he wouldnt let her. I had quite a few goes at him about it. He assured me he wasnt stopping her and she was playing us off.
Turns out, thats what she was doing. We brought her a joint bday present, and i kept saying to her, why didnt she take it to daddys... she told him i told her she wasnt allowed.
Shes only 5. Not saying thats what your Ds's are doing.. but????

Elasta - sounds like its all going so well ;)

Flame - why is he being confusing? are you officially 'seeing' each other.. or does he just have a different expectation of the relationship?

Snape - any train man or PM updates?

11 days Mr big free. Almost broke and emailed him last night. But didnt. Well done me
Boatman is superkeen to meet, as am i actually... but going to see the non dating period though. its very nice.. im liking it.
Not replied to buddists email yet. Not sure how i feel about that??? anyone help??

Sponge - stick with the weightloss. it is worth it and you will feel better.. You should be doing it for youself not any man anyway...
I rather enjoyed my month of so of stuffing my face but sat i felt and looked pretty awful and really bloated.. so its time to lose some. I want to lose stone and a half.
I lack motivation.. i dont know if you fancy checking in here.. or starting another thread in lone parents.. and check in food diary thing. help keep us ( and anyone else in lone parents) going and motivated about it?

Flame Wed 16-Mar-11 11:53:01

Grrr. The ONE time I decide to do things in writing rather than by phone... Job centre apparently had no idea I have moved house, for some reason a letter they have sent me hasn't turned up (despite redirection), so they have kindly stopped my money. Yay.

I have no idea if we are seeing each other or not tbh. He isn't intentionally messing with my head - he is dealing with some massive stuff, and I don't think that whether or not we are an "us" is really on his radar. He has a week. I am hectic all week and weekend anyway, so I am giving it a week to work itself out one way or another. Last night was a more "normal" chatty night, but not any mention of actually seeing each other.

DD1 plays us off against each other too. She announced that Daddy sat them down and told them that whore his friend was his girlfriend. He has done nothing of the sort (it was obv when I mentioned talking to daddy about it). The same with she tells me she is miserable there, but he says she is absolutely fine, and when I pick her up she is bouncing so I tend to believe him now.

yay for blooming job centre flame (((flame))) if ound out today that they'd stopped my winter fuel payment as well, ever so kindly not telling me until i queried it today sad there's been loads of complaints, i wonder why .....

Flame Wed 16-Mar-11 22:18:32

Bloody job centre.

In other news... I was brave, and <shock horror> asked Smurf if he intends to see me again.

He does indeed Says he is just sorting his shit out and hopes to see me soon.

elastamum Wed 16-Mar-11 22:25:46

Well done flame! Much better to be brave than keep suffering. Hope you are now feeling much smile

Am at home this week, still lusting after GW, roll on Friday week when he will be back from his travels. He'd better watch out grin

beaut says hi to everyone and she will post when she can

Hatesponge Wed 16-Mar-11 22:29:15

well done flame! I hate asking questions if there's a possibility of an answer I might not like...but great that you asked and got a positive response.

My date this Fri has cancelled, allegedly because he has to go to his daughter's bday meal. This is second time he's cancelled hmm He said he can make an evening next week, but I can't. and I have no free time for the next 2 weeks other than on Sat/Sun which is when he (allegedly) sees his daughter.

So I've suggested maybe we shouldn't bother (albeit not quite in those terms!).

Just call me Miss Havisham

she is in court tomorrow but will tryand post after when she gets home xxx

Flame Wed 16-Mar-11 22:37:47

Hmmm, two cancellings in a row would bother me too.

It took a hell of a lot of guts, but I was there still confused, and as much as I had been planning on leaving it a week, I want to enjoy my weekend without trying to work out crazy men. Figured I was best off finding out before going out for a meal with my mum and friend as at least that way I could be distracted for an evening with bad answer.

elastamum Wed 16-Mar-11 22:38:27

hi Sponge, sounds like he is messing you around hmm a friend of mine said to me that when you first meet a man they are on their best behaviour. If he isnt very reliable then, he wont get any better. Sad but true...

Hatesponge Wed 16-Mar-11 22:42:25

Well, I wasn't impressed, hence my response to him. It's not as though he's in WM's league (or the other one who shall not be discussed) either so not worth getting upset over.

lilacisinlove Wed 16-Mar-11 22:45:04

good news, flame...bad news, sponge...

I've been wondering about beaut, looking forward to an update.

elasta, sounds like things are going great for you. I'm glad you're giving him a chance despite his home situation. I was in a very similar position and it's far from easy. If he's right for you, just focus on that.

Not much going on here...my class assembly AND school trip tomorrow, dreading both confused. I'm going to tell DD1 about TLOML when she's home from school at the weekend. It's been four months since our first contact already and we're planning on spending the rest of our lives together and it's time she knew of his existence. I'll see how she takes it and then have another think about telling DD2. Current plan is that we all go out for my birthday on 27th and they meet him then. I would be a lot less bothered about it if they hadn't reacted so badly to exH telling them about his GF. He told them in JULY last year and they still haven't met her! Will let you know how it goes, keep your fingers crossed for me.

Wave to tookool, scl, mily, aurora, snape and anyone else I haven't mentioned. Where's ninah these days?

Flame Thu 17-Mar-11 07:43:40

Flameboy has snapped the ball thingy in the toilet cistern. <sigh> Have rigged it with a hairband. Gonna see how hard it is to fix myself as I can't be doing with the plumber hitting on me again!

<waves back at lilac and then at anyone else who's about later grin>

SparklyMily Fri 18-Mar-11 10:00:36

morning all, gosh it has taken me ages to catch up on the thread and I can't believe how long since I last posted

Elasta, great news about GW, grin grin grin

Flame, sad re job centre and loo but grin re bravery with smurf

Sponge, what the others said about cancelling twice

Aurora, hope all ok with you healthwise and moving

Took, well done on the Mr Big cold turkey, right thing to do but blardy hard

Snape, mid-20's definitely allowable smile

hi to everyone else, SCL, Lilac, MZ, Monty, Ninah, Eve

Meanwhile chez Mily just v v busy with life. Getting on with planning the wedding, which is fun, trying on swishy dresses etc etc grin

I will see if I can post a few so you can see where my thinking is going

tookoolforskool Fri 18-Mar-11 11:10:02

oooh yes. lets see

Lilac - good luck with telling them all.. hope it goes really well.

sponge - two cancellations. yep. not worth it.

13 days no mr big contact. Am doing well. but not so well that im not counting the days.
Boatman is becoming more and more interesting. Still on msn at the momment, but chatting to him is nice.

Though i am bored. And skint. I should be paiting the garden fences this weekend. hardly enthralling. My house is spotless too ( bar the room of doom, aka the office)
Even my mother commented at how amazing my house was looking. The woman is insane and hoovers twice a day ( and she works full time!) so, if shes says it looks amazing...!!!
Surely a sign im bored. last year it was very much lived in... because i was out with mr big. meh.

i can't see the pics mily if you've already posted some sad

all ok with me, dp bought me a dozen red roses today grin they're be-oooooo-tiful gringringrin

Snapespeare Fri 18-Mar-11 12:43:39

hello! back from Poland! (for work, with DXILs looking after the boys) Would have been nice to be met on my return - lots of couples hugging in terminal 1, bless them. they looked happy

revised OKC profile at weekend to remove giant mention of kids (they're still there, i just don't gush on and on and on about how great they are ;) ) and removed mention of not being up for a quick shag. hmm. no interest. at all.

no TM this week, as been away and missed my train spectacularly on monday.

no PlatMan since tuesday - nowhere near as good as TooKs 13 days (very proud! high five!) but changed my phone on tuesday and his number hasn't transfered across. have shoved iphone holding number to back of knicker drawer and let it run down. ha! lets see who cracks first PM! and i didn't send the postcard i wrote him from my trip either. shock

aurora! at flowers. lovely!

Mily! DRESSES!!!!!!!

Lilac - good luck for the weekend.

Hi All

Im just posting quickly before i read back through what everyone has been up to.

I have obtained a non-molestation order against exp am so so happy grin Although going to court again was awful i was so nervous and upset.When it goes to court in a couple of weeks i will be also requesting an amendment/variation to the contact order for my ds's.

I'm going to see DG this weekend all funded by him grin

elastamum Fri 18-Mar-11 15:31:15

Hi All,

Have just packed DS1 off for a weeks skiing with school so its just me and DS2 next week. Watching comic relief tonight with a bottle of wine

GW has gone away for the weekend, but he did phone me late last night before he left and txt me from the airport this morning. Am not used to the attention, it is very smile. He is coming up to see me nxt Friday. One of the upsides of his home situation is that he gets to travel to me! It is a really nice feeling to know he is keen, just hoping it lasts.

MILY, NICE to see you again. Want to see more dresses!

Snape, want to hear more about TM next week! also, do you live in the East Mids too?

Lilac, good luck with your DD and TLOML

<<waves to everyone else here>>

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 16:36:28

DG is back on? When did I miss that?

I am done with Smurf I think. I really really like him, but this is starting to piss me off now. If he wants me when he has sorted out his stuff, then fine, if I am still available then I will go for it, but I'm not sitting around waiting for him.

I am tired, tearful, v low, and just want someone to snuggle with.

SparklyMily Fri 18-Mar-11 16:56:20

Woah, DG is back??? Glad to hear you are ok BNM

Flame, ((((()))))

Lilac, good luck with the GCs and TLOML

dresses......the trouble is, the cheap ones aren't nice.....<sighs petulantly>

but I have found this wonderful site so am trying to work out if going all the way to bristol is worth it.....<bridezilla>
[[http://www.vintagedress.co.uk/40_70.html here]

SparklyMily Fri 18-Mar-11 16:57:15
SparklyMily Fri 18-Mar-11 16:57:35
SparklyMily Fri 18-Mar-11 16:57:52

oh ffs

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 18:28:08

I really like it in Bristol, so worth it for the outing

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 18:31:11

Oh I'm not reactivating my profiles on any sites btw. I can't be arsed atm. I know I want a someone, but I just don't have it in me right now to deal with nut jobs and second guessing etc.

elastamum Fri 18-Mar-11 19:00:20

Love the dresses MILY. wish I could try them on - or had a reason to even grin

Hatesponge Fri 18-Mar-11 19:42:59

Flame, I've deactivated mine as well. Am officially done with the internet as a method for meeting men, it's not for me.

Come to that, am done with the whole thing. The men I like are invariably shallow, and judge me by my appearance. The men who like my appearance are usually too stupid for me to tolerate. Which rather leaves me nowhere.

So am hanging up my dating shoes for the foreseeable, and will instead bask in the warm glow of the 15% bonus I got today (I may be shit at relationships, but I am a bloody good lawyer! grin).

So good luck to all...and I will be back from time to time, not least for updates on Mily's dress

NOmeansNO Fri 18-Mar-11 20:55:29

evening all,

<gets out some wine>

things finally easing up for a few weeks with uni so thought i'd come catch up.

i'm thinking of coming back to join those on the bookshelf. the sofa is giving me a numb asse.

who's all still here from when I was last?. i'll give you a clue, half european dc.

can anyone fill me in? have i missed anything big? do you have any good dating stories i missed?

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 21:06:56

Wouldn't mind a numb arse right now.

I wish I had a career I loved and was good at HS

NOmeansNO Fri 18-Mar-11 21:12:50

flame, hows things with you?

you dont want a numb asse. it really is a pain.

i'm thinking of extracting myself from this situation and resolving not to ever get involved with anyone on a serious basis again.

stick to them having their own place and meeting / staying over.

this living together thing doesn't work for me.

think of all the lovely things you get to do without a 2nd thought.

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 21:28:46

Oh yes good point, I'm not sure I would want to live with anyone.

Meh, things ok. Download may be coming round. <goes back in time>

I have resolved not to become smitten, only to smite.

Oh and to make use of Mattarse at any opportunity.

NOmeansNO Fri 18-Mar-11 21:30:59

what or who is mattarse?

do you mean download the music festival?

Flame Fri 18-Mar-11 23:08:19

Download was a bloke from January - we met up a couple of times, but then I went slightly nuts at him and he decided maybe not to continue it wink. Plus he caught on to the Carrot love. We've kept in touch, talk on MSN most nights. He's just gone home again (we were dozing off). blush It is weird with him - v little attraction appearance-wise but that spark is there.

Mattarse. <gazes wistfully> He started off as just Matt, but his arse is a thing of wonder so his name morphed. He is a 21yr old personal trainer... He tends to live in my phone, rarely shows up, but when he does it is incredible. Total mess, no way relationship material, but I cannot resist him.

elastamum Fri 18-Mar-11 23:51:13

Hi all,

Have just had some really sad news, am knocked for six. My oldest friend's dad has just died suddenly from a stroke. I remember him lecturing us on our appearance when we were teenagers but still letting us drink his wine. Me chauffering him and his mates in his car when they had been out. I lived with them for a bit when I first graduated, he was wonderful.

She is devastated, it is so very sad sad

Flame Sat 19-Mar-11 08:02:12


lilacisinlove Sat 19-Mar-11 08:41:13

elasta, sorry for you and your friend. I'm sure you'll be a great support for her.

elastamum Sat 19-Mar-11 11:15:30

Thanks all, am going to call her later, she is too upset to talk atm. Just wish I wasnt so far away sad

adamschic Sat 19-Mar-11 12:47:53

Place marking, NomeansNo, have an idea but not 100% who you are.

Hope everyone is OK. I'm still seeing EV, I enjoy his company but don't envisage anything major.

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 15:56:49

welcome back NMNgrin
you've been much missed!
so sorry to hear that things didn't work out with dp but knowing you you'll soon get your life back on track
offering you a lgewinefor later!
or a{bombay sapphire emoticon}!

adamschic Sat 19-Mar-11 17:02:17

ASBM what's happening with you. Are you still with DP, did we miss the wedding etc. Questions, questions and can NMN pm me to confirm who she is.

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 17:19:34

<waves back>
yy still with dpsmile
no date set as yet as poss redundancy looms for him,so things on hold for nowsad
anyhoow what's happening with your new bloke?
sounds as tho you're enjoying it!
nice to see that many of us long term posters have decent men in our lives,even die hard cynic kdkgrin
would be good to hear of some action for monty,scl,ninah and sponge!!

ninah Sat 19-Mar-11 17:31:21

hi asbm I saw your name pop up on active convos! don't have much to say on thread as my love life is a morgue, and - worse perhaps - I no longer care!
sorry about dp, so many friends have had the shadow of redundancy loom, a good friend's husband lost his job last winter, but luckily has found a new one after plenty of searching (late 40s, works in rather narrow field, so v anxious).
didn't see that kdk had gone over to The Sofa ...
I am you atm, hate (albeit without the pay scale lol). Am on waiting list for teacher training this year, or have place for next year, and going to focus on that for the time being. I hear it is a very hard year, followed by an equally hard nqt year, so am a bit apprehensive as to how I will cope. Been out and about today and bumped into lots of 'yummy' mums going on about how they are doing baking with their dc, and I am fit to drop as it is, so have been ignoring mine while they play in the garden. Also I am thinking about a very short, very budget holiday at Easter. I have never been abroad on my own and it's about time I did.

ninah Sat 19-Mar-11 17:31:55

sorry, I am you, HATE, atm!

ninah Sat 19-Mar-11 17:32:30

oh I did say that. Tired out!

ninah Sat 19-Mar-11 17:35:44

and I dunno who you are nmn but we need some more at the bar, so yy leave the sofa!
you sound lovely, I ought to know you, I like the wine but your clue is pants, we are all European now innit!

NOmeansNO Sat 19-Mar-11 18:38:59

ninah - what do you mean about to drop? did you get a bun in oven? if so is it on off train loving fella?

asbm - really glad to hear you are still with dp. we went through a redundancy. one of the factors that caused us to get in this mess. he was expecting me to support him too much for it being early on. i did for a bit, then thought "fuck it, i'm not a cash machine" i didn't feel he was making enough of an effort. and i got a rollocking on another thread about other things he did and made me realise he realise was taking the piss.

adamschic... i dont know who you are to pm. plus i haven't paid my subs so cant. i possibly had you on msn before. but i dont use it anymore.give me a clue and i'll pm you.

ninah.... superman, comic book guy.. etc etc.. you know who i am yet?

elasta - so sorry to hear that. xx hope you are well otherwise.

flame - you sound like your having fun! thats exactly how it should be!

NOmeansNO Sat 19-Mar-11 18:40:48

oh and i think i will be out tonight for some wine

gonna do a bit of study first. and then reward myself.

trying to sell a saxophone on ebay too. only used 6 times! things immaculate. seems totally pointless just sitting in cupboard and i have no time to use it.

adamschic Sat 19-Mar-11 18:41:28

Used to be 'eve' and pm is new and free nowadays.

NOmeansNO Sat 19-Mar-11 18:58:06

oh wow, just done it. shows you how often i am on here. i never even realised there was a new inbox thingy at the top!

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 19:50:06

<waves back @ ninah>
fingers firmly X for you as i know how hard the last few years have been and just how much you've achieved for you and dcs
things are shocking atm in this country..why are they cutting vital services??
NMN fantastic that you're having a fewwine
lovely to see you on here again,just wish it could have been under happier circs for you

Snapespeare Sat 19-Mar-11 19:54:35

pulling up a booze.

3rd weekend without PM. feel irrationaly angry and incredibly horny at the same time. thats clearly a good basis for 'moves' hmm thinking of deleting dating profiles again. really rubbish. really. feel sad and unloved and frustrated today.

on the bright side! I'm trying to get a secondment next year as part of my management training scheme thinging and i met camila batmanghelidjh today - she is just incredibly lovely, i have utterly lost my heart to her and she called me fabulous and offered me a job for at least a year and then maybe poaching me from 'real' work. what a change to feel wanted on any some level!

Snapespeare Sat 19-Mar-11 19:57:36

oh god! sorry, it's all me me me...

elasta - so sorry to hear of your loss.

asbm, nmn - helo - we haven't yet met i think? <pours you both a wine

hope all good with everyone else.

NOmeansNO Sat 19-Mar-11 20:08:59

asbm - come on now, you know me better than that. this is happy circumstances. i get to be horribly endulgant and only think of me and dc again. bright side as always.

i'm nipping out to pub now. bit frosty here, so avoiding being at home when p is and dc are not.

ninah - fingers crossed too over here.

snapespear. no , unless you are an old name we haven't. <waves>

<grabs wine bottle and slugs direct before jumping in the shower>

Snapespeare Sat 19-Mar-11 20:17:44

charmed, I'm sure! <looks after bottle whilst you are showering. it will be safe with me!> hmm

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 20:51:15

NMN you go girl...!!grin
so good to see that you've still got it in you!
please have a dble bombay for megrin

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 20:51:32

Evening all,

NMN - I messaged you on fb earlier

Waves at ASBM and Ninah

I'm still on bookshelf but fairly happily so. Someone has an interest in me but I'm not sure about him, but then I never am grin

Drudged out today and having a nice cold beer.

MILY - I ROFL at Bridezilla. You do make me laugh.

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 20:53:27

wine LARGE one of to montgrin

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 20:56:41

lol, <glug>

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 21:00:24

hey hands off lolgrin

Snapespeare Sat 19-Mar-11 21:17:25

wine wine wine

pm just texted me. forgot i'd poured straight vodka into glass without topping up with tonic and glugged it. oops.

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 21:17:27

Oh come on, I know you have a stash, plenty to go round.

Have some more wine <puts another into chill>


sincitylover Sat 19-Mar-11 22:15:53

Yes I am on chilled wine

waves to everybody - nothing much happening here.

At least able to get out in some sunshine today although got a bit nippy late afternoon.

Nothing on the dating front to report whatsover - am still on two sites but no-one catches my eye.

My friend met someone for a date the other week -first date went well but second she said he turned up in awful clothes looking all scruffy and unkempt. Needless to say she isn't going to meet him again.

lilacisinlove Sat 19-Mar-11 23:08:28

Update...have told DD1 about TLMOL!!

She took it brilliantly! She was sitting up in bed and I said I had met someone very, very special who makes me very happy and she just smiled and held her arms out and gave me a big hug. She said she had guessed it wouldn't be long and I said I had worried about how she would take it because of the situation with her dad. I told her his name, job, about his DD and that we would still have our special time together (she is at boarding school so this is v important). I said that I would like him to join us at Thorpe Park next Sunday when we have planned to celebrate my birthday and mothers day and she said that was ok. I'm SO relieved and I know he will be too. He's visiting his parents this weekend and knew I was going to tell her and I have had several anxious texts!

Big sigh of relief and a grin

lilacisinlove Sat 19-Mar-11 23:09:01

In my excitement can't even spell the acronym...should be TLOML!

aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 23:11:20

mont behave!{strict emoticon}
jeeze scl he sounds awful did she meet him online?
hope your boys are good,have read thru the latest with the fexhangry

sincitylover Sat 19-Mar-11 23:12:22

Lilac that's fantastic news grin - how old is your dd?

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 23:16:36

ASBM - my name and 'behave' in one sentence is a paradoxical travesty lol. Have another wine

Hi Sin, hoping this weekend is going well with ds's.

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 23:17:45

... and lol at fexh


aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 23:29:38

thanks v muchly mont as always!!grin
yy fexh should be new MN acronym!!
lilac,snape and flame without appearing to seem rude are you name changers?

Monty27 Sat 19-Mar-11 23:33:14

I might change mine to fexh



aseriouslyblondemoment Sat 19-Mar-11 23:37:50

hell yes mont you so shouldgrin
and bring on the wine

FEXH Sat 19-Mar-11 23:38:58


You likie?



lilacisinlove Sat 19-Mar-11 23:50:27

I've been lilac something-or-other from the beginning, asbm...joined this thread in Sept last year and met TLOML in November but still like to keep up with everyone else's dating escapades. I think I hold a bit of a record of having managed to have three first dates with three different men on the same day!!

sin, DD1 is 13...now have to tell DD2 (aged 11 and v clingy) what is going on.

aseriouslyblondemoment Sun 20-Mar-11 00:05:21

fexh pmsl if you're mine or others on here!!
lilac good to hear that you've got your life back on tracksmile
i rarely post on this thread now as the humour and support has long gone and for some it's become so self absorbed

FEXH Sun 20-Mar-11 00:21:02

ASBM - I've lost track of who is who at times too. Some original posters are: Ninah still Ninah and Hatesponge, Eve (is now Adamschic), KDK (is now Mzdemeanour), Dontouch, is obv now NMN, Sin and most others are as we were. Except for me tonight <twirls>

It's not the same I agree and its lovely to 'see' you again.


FEXH Sun 20-Mar-11 00:23:19



Terrible hostess, Sponge can confirm that, although in my defence, she's an early riser smile

aseriouslyblondemoment Sun 20-Mar-11 00:27:58

you're a bugger!!!wink
now get off MN and look after my LO's!!!

ninah Sun 20-Mar-11 08:00:24

nomeansno I know who you are now! omg I had been asking after you for ages, lovely you are back (yy I know, but it's nice here at the bar).. really smile to see you!
but shock you thought I was preggers by the train man - by 'ready to drop' I just meant tired lol! I had to shunt him into the sidings long ago, for being, let's say, rather economy fare - a bit Apex lol
I don't get fexh what does it mean? I am v confused at name changes. Did suspect adamschic was eve but only by writing style and wasn't sure, in fact the clue's in the name innit duh

Snapespeare Sun 20-Mar-11 08:34:25

i'm presuming it's f*cking ex husband. i like

i used to be persephonesnape, but got tired of the underworld.

dreadful DREADFUL hangover this morning. dreadful. nnnnnnnnnnn.

tookoolforskool Sun 20-Mar-11 09:40:07

lilac - so glad it went well

haha snape. poor you. bacon sandwich? nice that pm texted you, what did he say? You know i deleted all my profiles. best thing i ever did. They didnt make me feel better, or good or anything. they were just depressing.. the barrage of crap messages from men i wouldnt even look at.. or would activley avoid was awful.
the secondment also sounds amazing

Sponge - congrats on the pay rise!!!! thats really quite amazing. and if you want, delete your profile too.

15 days and no mr big.Ive blocked and deleted him on msn... havent quite brought myself to do the same on my phone.
Chatting daily to boatman too.. moved onto texting now.i find him really interesting, which is a surprise.

Not replied to buddists last email yet. still a bit unsure about the whole being a buddist thing. ( thats really un pc isnt it, sorry.. i just dont know if that fits in with me and how i view things.... if hes serious enough to be ordained.. then its not just like hes some half hearted fairweather budist)

in other news my garden is looking amazing. decking is all painted. Boarder all weeded and turned over. new shurbs planted and today, to top of the excitement ( not!) im painting all the fences. joy!
My only consolation is that when dds dad is back.. and ive done all these things already i shall be able to kick back and relax, or have a few mad weekends without worrying about it.

Snapespeare Sun 20-Mar-11 11:42:37

bacon sandwich has been eaten and kept down! <high fives self!> PM - general chitchat - he's been busy hmm he's missed me, 'can't wait to catch up' he has been busy with work, i know - still. promised him a steak dinner (pretty sure thats not a euphamism, right?) he's in a play next weekend, so can sit in the dark and drool quietly. my pal is coming from manchester for the weekend and there's the anti-cuts demo - so will be fun. very excited about secondment. something i am so utterly passionate about and i get paid for it! wow!

15 days drought took? how do you feel? couldn't agree more about dating sites. i just keep my OKC up on the very very off-chance there is someone else.

lilac - so pleased about DD1!

NOmeansNO Sun 20-Mar-11 13:14:43

afternoon all, i am fiding that having the wkds off and no kids is fantastic. i managed to have a lie in till noon today was great! yippee.

fexh - i am still trying to work out who you are??? are you janos?

where is janos? whats she up to anyway?

You never know, we'll get the thread back up and running properly if I need to start reporting how my escapades are going again wink

there doesn't seem to be many stories of weird and wonderful dates anymore?

was I the only loon who used to go on dates just for the experience of meeting someone new? i liked going even if i didn't think of them as potential.i used to go as long as the chat was good.

pub was fun last night. grin my friend got an admission of affection from this hot guy who was marriedshock. but he had a weird shape nose. poker straight with the end actually looked like he had a pea shaped lump of skin. i found it really difficult not to focus my attention to it with alcohol in my system.

NOmeansNO Sun 20-Mar-11 13:29:44

oh and ninah - grin at baby train.

i am with you on the apex. when people ask why i am spliiting my response is always . "its a false economy this relationship stuff"

i was thinking about this the other day. now sharing your house with a bloke does mean half the bills. but it also means you need to buy bithday gifts and valentines and anniversary crap. and xmas. so you end up worse off. especially if like in my case i end up paying 2/3 of bills as there is 3 of us, and only 1 of p.

aseriouslyblondemoment Sun 20-Mar-11 13:34:33

ohh yes nmn it's fab to have you back on board,can't wait to hear all your dating stories againgrin
have you signed up for pof yet?!
pmsl that you thought ninah had got preggers from train man...i bet she sprayed her tea across the screen when she read that!