Hi All
Hoping for someone on here who might understand how I feel.
I've been living in Australia with my DP for 3.5 years. We're both 30. We came here on a 2 year visa for a job offer for DP, his contract then got extended and we got permanent Australian residency.
I love life here... We have more freedom, more money, better weather... We have a better quality of life than we had in the UK. We have made great friends I can't imagine leaving.
The whole time I've been here, however, I have been plagued with guilt over leaving. My parents are divorced and both live alone. They don't have much money. My mum is the kind of person that finds it hard to see things from others' perspectives and often feels hard done to. She is quite emotionally fragile. She misses me terribly. She constantly talks of 'when I'm back' as if checking whether I will correct her, and I always leave it because honestly, I can't make any plans. I love it here, what would take me back is how worried I am about my parents future.
Last week, we discovered I am 5 weeks pregnant. We are happy, I have always wanted to be a mum! Since finding out, I haven't been sleeping because im so worries about telling mum. She will be devastated at the thought of her grandchild being on the other side of the world. I honestly don't even know if she will see this as good news.
Were getting married in March and the family is all coning over. It has cost her a lot of money and with baby due in August, I know she won't be able to afford to come out again to cuddle her newborn grandchild. I feel like I am denying her, and the baby, something so important.
I don't think the pregnancy and all the challenges we are going to have doing this alone really sunk in for me until tonight when I started crying in the car on my way home from work and couldn't stop. I know I am a bit hormonal but I don't know how to reconcile myself with my decisions.
Does anyone have any sage words of wisdom or advice on how I might help my mum to accept this? Or should we just move back to the UK?
Thanks for reading this lengthy ramble!
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Living overseas
Pregnant and struggling with expat guilt
8 replies
User24689 · 03/12/2014 12:07
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