Anyone else wonder what on earth you're doing here?

(11 Posts)
GoneGirlGone Wed 18-Dec-13 11:04:42

Just a rant really. Feeling blue as Christmas approaches and am very far from friends and family. Been here two years and while we have settled in, DC happy etc I sometimes just ask myself what on earth am I doing here? Why did we leave a perfectly good life behind with our families and friends? Yes it has been a good move in theory but I don't know, I just feel lonely.

AndMiffyWentToSleep Wed 18-Dec-13 11:57:32

Yes, I hear you!
Very lonely here sad
I'm not sure why I'm here. Well I do, it's so DP can spend time with DS apart from when he's late home from work for no good reason. But what's in it for me?

honeyloops23 Fri 20-Dec-13 06:55:34

AndMiffy - you completely sum up how I feel - what's in it for me?! I've done several moves over the past 2 years and am totally fed up - DH gets to chase his dreams and I've had to give up all mine and I don't feel that there is any going back now sad

JollySantersSelectionBox Fri 20-Dec-13 09:51:12

Where are you all?

GoneGirlGone Fri 20-Dec-13 19:27:03

It really is tough. Have had a better few days and work with the loveliest team so that helps. Just miss my own friends, have made heaps of new mum acquaintances through the school but not really anyone to organise a drink with. Was a bit glum realising that I had no pre-Christmas drinks with anyone except work. Stil, it could indeed be worse. I will try to be grateful for what I have.

Lavenderhoney Sat 21-Dec-13 17:55:58

Yes, which is why I am heading back to the UK after 5 long years ( feels like 20) very soon.

People say " its such an experience, and you make new friends" and I think " what, like prison? And I liked my old friends thanks"

Cerisier Sun 22-Dec-13 09:02:57

No Christmas drinks with anyone but work here either. I don't have any close friends left, those I have made have all left in the past two years. That is the nature of the expat beast.

To be honest DH and I are happy be with our teens talking and watching films. The conversations we have are far preferable to small talk with acquaintances.

It is hard being away from family in some ways but I don't miss driving up and down the motorway and trying to keep everyone happy at this time of year.

RaspberryRuffle Fri 27-Dec-13 11:01:29

Lavenderhoney that's just how I feel right now. I want my old life back (even the annoying bits) but it's not that simple...I love DH.
And yes, the proper meaningful friends I made have left in recent years. And I'm quite envious of them!

heather1 Sun 05-Jan-14 14:09:48

I feel like this too. Been here for nearly 3 years. It's been a bumpy couple of years with schooling now much better as they are at International School. But I just have this feeling that I don't want to be here. Still miss my Uk friends and living in a house but am I being a bit the grass is greener?
Plus doesn't look like Dh job is 'going anywhere' so I know unless that changes, and I don't think it will, we won't be here forever anyway.
I think I need to get back in to the normal routine and concentrate on something for me, I am a SAHM, and then maybe Ill feel better about it all.
Oh and stop looking at houses on right move too, that might help!

imalama Mon 06-Jan-14 13:16:21

I wonder, except our situation is a little different. I'm the expat and my DH is English and I'm now at the point where I want to move home to be with my family. We're talking about moving to my home country or halfway between the two, but I'm scared that if this doesn't happen I will either be stuck in the UK being miserable for the rest of my life or have to leave my DH. It can be a tough life.

heather1 Mon 06-Jan-14 15:12:52

It's difficult isn't it. We are going to sit down and write a list of the positive and negative aspects of here and also England. DH always wanted to to try living abroad, I didn't really mind but I so miss a house. Although he have a great life here, in many ways, I miss little things e.g. Some things can be very expensive My son wants to learn to play tennis but it the equivalent of 35 £ for a 1 hour group lesson per child and I just can't justify that.
Maybe I should just agree with Dh to how much longer we want to be here and then leave it at that as some sort of closure. Ds is only 9 there's plenty of time for tennis lessons!

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