Why name change?
No experience of Malaysia but I would imagine would be similar to singapore and Hong kong.
- she would normally be deported.
- yes very simple. One month wages and haste la vista.Employing someone legally through a proper contract established by an established agency will protect both you and the employee.
- As easy/difficult as getting a decent employer. They have more to fear than you usually. Very precarious situation for most women.
- see above: what is a decent employer? If you are specific and reasonable about your expectations and provide decent pay, respect and good living conditions, you will usually get someone who will happily slave away for your family with gratitude.
- that is for you to answer.
There is a huge scale of expectations.
Some maids will simply clean up, walk the dog and cook simple meals, and maybe babysit a bit (typical expat western employer) others will work round the clock taking care of a large household (kids and aging parents) + cook and be expected to serve elaborate meals at all hours of the day and night (chinese, indian families etc?).
I don't mean to be rude or stereotyping but if you are in the latter category, be very specific and pay generously.
Am a cross between the 2 and have had the same helper for years. A bit of luck am sure but mainly a lot of respect, regular pay rises or bonuses for extra work. She's like a big sister to the kids.
The relationship is really entirely what you as a family make it. She will take her cues from you.
It is also entirely possible that the chemistry doesn't work from the start. You should have no qualms about dismissing and finding someone else. It happens very often and she will find another job provided that you are straightforward with the agency.
Make sure you use a good agency to make the process completely dispassionate and fair for everyone.
hope that helps.