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This board is primarily for those whose children have LGBTQ+ parents to share their personal experiences and advice.

LGBT parents

do gay parents have to live in london?

53 replies

charliegal · 24/04/2007 08:54

Am being a bit facetious, but what are you're experiences of living outside the capital? Having been a London dweller for about 10 years, I'm still under the impression that lesbians are tarred and feathered in the provinces. As for lesbians with children....
Just in case we want to move for more fresh air and less gun crime.
Obviously don't reply if you live in Manchester or Brighton. Or Leeds. I know there's loads of us there.

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gess · 24/04/2007 08:57

I know several here (Plymouth). Not really an issue.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 08:59

Oh, that's brilliant...several, who'd have thought.
I need to get out more.

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Nbg · 24/04/2007 09:00

Awww thats so sad that you feel like that

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ledodgy · 24/04/2007 09:02

Hebden Bridge in west Yorkshire has alot of lesbian couples there. My lesbian friend and her partner moved there for this reason. It has countryside and fresh air so this is always an option.

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hatwoman · 24/04/2007 09:02

not quite the same (ie not a parent) but I find it enormously reassuring that my 76 year old mum's northern small village book group has a lesbian member. as far as I know they haven't tarred or feathered her. having said that there is the possibility that whilst my mum and other liberal members of the group don't bat an eyelid, a couple of Daily mail readers might be adopting the Queen Victoria approach.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:03

Oops- feel like what? I just meant that I've always felt lesbian parents would be an oddity outside a large city.
Having said that, sometimes feel like a slight oddity at the baby groups here, but Mums too polite to say anything.

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Zofloyya · 24/04/2007 09:04

I live in a Northern city (not Leeds or Manchester), and there are 3 lesbian families with kids at my dd's school. I am friendly with all of them (in a bizarre coincidence, they are all in the same line of work, and it's what I do too): as far as I know they have had no problems with homophobia at all.

Where I live, you would definitely get more stick if you went around with a sort of 'oh the provinces are so quaint and backward and reactionary' attitude than for being a lesbian! People here are very proud of their city.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:05

Oh god yeah, hebden bridge and todmorden. Forgot about that.

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mustrunmore · 24/04/2007 09:05

I think in my mums village you'd be worshipped as some kind of unusual deity But in the 'real' area around here, its no diff to london!

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:05

Z- I know what you mean. I'm a Northerner. Easy to get a siege mentality living in London.

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MuminBrum · 24/04/2007 09:06

I know at least three sets of gay parents (two female, one male) in Birmingham and I'm sure I could think of more if I spent a few minutes mentally running through my acquaintances!

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Zofloyya · 24/04/2007 09:06

x-posted with your last message: it's not a particularly large city, but I suppose it is still an urban culture. Don't know about queer families in the countryside, but I do have gay male friends in villages not so far from here, and they have been accepted into the community very warmly.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:07

yippee. you make me feel better.

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gess · 24/04/2007 09:11

I didn't mean to offend. I don't actually know that many parents full stop. Some of the parents I know happen to be lesbians as well and I've never heard any mutterings or whisperings, or had it come up as any sort of issue. I moved from London, have come across less homohpbia down here tbh. Devon is often seen as backwards- in some ways it is, but I don't think being lesbian would remotely be an issue in the area I live in. That's all I was trying to say.

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Zofloyya · 24/04/2007 09:20

gess, did you think my comments about atitudes to the provinces were directed at you? they weren't. Sorry anyway if they seemed too spiky - I have obviously 'gone native' and become a bluff Yorkshirewoman!

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:22

No no, not offended. Wow, Devon sounds so lovely too. Good to hear of your experiences.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:23

Hehe heh, I know your comments were directed at ME. quite right too.

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gess · 24/04/2007 09:23

no, no zoy- I thought charliegals 8:59 message sounded like I might have offended her. I agree with your bit about the provinces! It's an easy way to wind people up down here as well.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:24

Now I feel a bit paranoid. gess, my firsy response to you was not intended to be sarcastic, but genuine.

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gess · 24/04/2007 09:24

oh good! Round the South Hams, probably anything goes.

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gess · 24/04/2007 09:25

x posting again! I did come across more open homophobia in London btw- which kind of surprised me.

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charliegal · 24/04/2007 09:42

yeah, there is homophobia here. I hear it when people don't realise I'm gay.
haven't met any other lesbian mums yet but my ds is only 5 months old!

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SpookyMadMummy · 24/04/2007 10:15

Lesbians with children next door but one to us. We are in yorkshire

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allgonebellyup · 10/05/2007 19:21

Brighton is a good place for gay parents, and gay people in general! And also very lively and accepting of all things!
Loved living there.

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Cammelia · 10/05/2007 19:26

I work with a lesbian couple who have 3 children between them. They are very provincial

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