Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. Free legal advice is available from a Citizen's Advice Bureau, and the Law Society can supply a list of local solicitors.

Divorce - husband will sign over house to me in exchange for money. Advice please.

(37 Posts)
butterandcrumpets Sun 17-Jul-16 10:56:02

Dh wants to separate from me and is happy for me to have the house in exchange for £10000, the amount his dm had put in to help us out with the deposit. I can afford the mortgage on my own and would like to stay in the house, but am wondering how best to raise the money? Would I be able to release some of the equity of the house or put it on to the mortgage? I have some savings but not enough. Am fairly clueless about all things mortgage related.

Does anyone have any advice or knows about the options available? Thank you.

CodyKing Sun 17-Jul-16 10:57:40

Do you have equity?

You need to prove you can afford the mortgage as you are basically selling the house together and you are then purchasing it on your own - as far as the mirage company are concerned -

Toffeelatteplease Sun 17-Jul-16 11:02:54

Does he have a pension? Unless you know how much that pension is worth I wouldn't touch his offer with a bargepole.

HalsallRedux Sun 17-Jul-16 11:11:52

OP it might be a good idea to post in Relationships with this question as well - there's a lot of expertise on hand there.

VimFuego101 Sun 17-Jul-16 11:12:45

Do you have kids/ pensions? His offer might not be as good as you think.

ChicRock Sun 17-Jul-16 11:12:54

Do you have children?

ImperialBlether Sun 17-Jul-16 11:14:33

I'd give the money to his mother, too.

How long have you been married for? Did you put any money into the house? Did you stop work to bring up children? Are you both working? Lots of questions to answer before anyone can tell you it's a good idea to pay him that money.

Lilaclily Sun 17-Jul-16 11:27:54

Have you sought legal advice ?

OurBlanche Sun 17-Jul-16 11:30:39

And it is perfectly possible that his DM gave it to you both as a gift - she would have signed off on her rights to reclaim it as a loan - so you wouldn't owe either of them anything anyway.

You need to invest in a solicitor!

butterandcrumpets Sun 17-Jul-16 12:32:38

thank you for your replies.

I am the main earner by a lot, teacher's pension, no children, married for 4 years. He has no pension, works minimum wage. He just wants to get away as he feels I have engeneered this situation to my advantage. Once house is in my name and he has the money, he says he will not claim anything else. We were thinking of sorting house, then have separation agreement drawn up.

His dm gifted us the money and has signed off rights, so I know I don't owe him or her anything.

How do I know whethere there is equity in the house (as i said, am clueless? Do i need to have it valued by mortgage company or is there a way to guestimate?

butterandcrumpets Sun 17-Jul-16 12:33:57

Please excuse typos; on phone.

greenfolder Sun 17-Jul-16 12:38:19

In that case, it does sound reasonable to give his mum her £10k back and you all move on with your lives. Re equity you could have a look at similar houses online and/or get estate agents to value as a start. If you bought 4 years ago likely it had gone up a bit and your equity will have increased. This will make it easier to remortgage.

butterandcrumpets Sun 17-Jul-16 12:44:06

We only bought the house one year ago; were renting it beforehand. I think I will start by making an appointment with mortgage company to discuss options.

OurBlanche Sun 17-Jul-16 12:56:28

Do get legal advice but, given the information in your last couple of posts, maybe paying his mum back and calling it quits, getting a legal 'clean break' is the best thing to do.

Good luck.

butterandcrumpets Sun 17-Jul-16 13:00:39

Thank you, OurBlanche. He wants the money though as he feels it was his inheritance hmm

OurBlanche Sun 17-Jul-16 13:10:31

Given that, if you can afford it and can get the paperwork sorted, it might be easiest to just pay him off and get him out of your life completely, regardless of the letter of the law.

It is, as they say, 'only money' and if you think he will make life unpleasant for you you might find that a useful mantra smile

MustStopAndThinkBeforePosting Sun 17-Jul-16 13:18:51

I don't think he should get the full £10k back.

The deposit was a gift to you and him jointly. You aren't expecting to repay him the full value of any of the other gifts you have received over the course of your relationship are you? The obvious fair thong is to split all these things 50:50. So maximum to give him would be £5k unless there's other large assets you are also keeping rather than sharing.

Even then I'd only pay up if he has been contributing a fair amount to household expenses in the meantime. If he has been freeloading then deduct a fair amount for a year's worth of accommodation and living expenses.

PokemonGo Sun 17-Jul-16 13:24:08

Selling the house, moving and buying somewhere else will probably cost you more than the £10,000 - I think it sounds like a very reasonable and sensible offer.

You might have a problem with the mortgage though.

PokemonGo Sun 17-Jul-16 13:25:17

BTW if this was the other way around and it was a higher earning man then I'm not sure the answers would be the same. hmm

Madbengalmum Sun 17-Jul-16 13:27:12

Couldnt you get a loan for this amount?
Credit card?

That is if you cant get it on your mortgage.

RandomMess Sun 17-Jul-16 13:29:39

I don't think it's unreasonable of your H to want it back - you are the higher earner, he could claim off your pension and ask for spousal maintenance!!!

Without DC in the equation I think it would be fair to give him the whole £10k back unless for some reason the house had significantly decreased in value etc.

Chasingsquirrels Sun 17-Jul-16 13:34:26

Whatever you do, make it part of your financial settlement and have it signed off in court rather than just agreeing and taking each others word for it.

OurBlanche Sun 17-Jul-16 13:35:13

Oh there probably would Poke

Given the short time period and the relatively low amount involved, I would imagine either side would be told that, if they got good advice and a proper legal agreement, then a clean break might be the least complicated way to go!

Sometimes MNers aren't quite as rabidly anti men as you might expect smile

Autumnchill Sun 17-Jul-16 13:35:21

Sounds like a good deal but get an agreement drawn up by a solicitor which ensures he can't come back and claim at a later date for pension etc.

throwingpebbles Sun 17-Jul-16 13:35:48

I would sort it all at the same time as the rest of the divorce. Have you been to mediation yet?

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now