*Did you try to get one ex parte
(without notice to him) and were refused at the first hearing? *
Yes.
Were you then given leave to withdraw your application because you didn't want to make it with notice to him?
I was told it would be listen as an urgent with-notice hearing. I had already told my sol there was no way I would do that. In the end it was just listed along with everything else ie not urgent (telling me that the judge really didn't support me), and I formally withdrew.
Were you not advised when you made the application it would have to be served on him after the first without notice hearing?
No.
I'm surprised he was not served regardless at the time when you made the application, as justice requires that a respondent is told of allegations and has an opportunity to respond as soon as possible. It's possible to have an initial order made short term without notice if you convince the court you or children would be at risk if he was aware, but he must be told immediately after the order is made informed of the allegations and given the chance to respond and object very quickly thereafter. He therefore was always going to know of your application at the time. Or did you fail because you hadn't served the application on him or some other procedural problem ?
So, are you telling me that he knows anyway? This is the first time I have heard this. It failed because the judge said the situation wasn't bad enough to warrant an ex-parte injunction.
Whether the judge tells him or not now is a matter for the judge. Are cafcass advising that he not be told? More chance if that is recommended.
Cafcass normally send their report to all parties prior to the hearing. They will not do this due to the non-mol mentioned in the report, so yes they are supportive of my ex not being informed.
But again, if it's info that forms part of their recommendations the judge is likely to consider your ex has the right to see that. You may want to consider renewing your non mol application if you are seriously concerned about your safety with regards to his reaction.
Ha ha. I am afraid I feel entirely let down by the legal system when it comes to emotional abuse. Black eye....they would have got him out of my house pretty sharpish.
Ex is no longer in the family home so there is no crushing EA, but he still uses it as a means to control me via contact with our younger son, and hand overs can be very difficult. Not enough to warrant a non-mol order, but hopefully an undertaking within the court order.
You need to email the court in advance to request a MF come into court with you and explain briefly who they are.
Thank you. So, which is right....just turn up, or email the court in advance?