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Taking children abroad for holiday

(9 Posts)
mrsdarcey78 Sat 09-Apr-16 14:11:40

Hi I have 3 children ages 18 14 and 9. I am still legally married to my "ex" husband and we all have the same surname. We have been separated for nearly two years. As far as I can understand it he does not automatically have parental responsibilty for the older children as we were unmarried when they were born and it was before 2003. He does not see the children at all and only pays less then half the maintenance he should and if he hears from the maintenance place I get letters from the mediation firm threatening him taking me to court for access until I agree to accept the less amount. The relationship and marriage was emotionally and physically abusive. There has been no court action/order and he hasnt seen them since 2014. I am hoping to save enough to take them on holiday abroad this year but my main worry is would I need his permission to do so?. He certainly would not give it and not without some stipulation involved. How do I stand with this and will we have to wait until my youngest is 16 to go abroad? Thanks for any help on this matter.

runningincircles12 Sat 09-Apr-16 14:31:17

Hi there
He does have PR for the children (though the 18 yo is now an adult),. He would have gained it when you got married.
If you check this thread out, I have given some advice to a previous poster about a similar issue:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_matters/2607430-Taking-kids-abroad-on-holiday-laws-when-no-contact-Anyone-know-the-law

babybarrister Sat 09-Apr-16 19:52:38

agreed! you need his consent or an order of the court

crusoe16 Thu 14-Apr-16 07:44:56

If he doesn't see the children, he won't find out will he? You won't need his permission to get through the airport - nobody will bat an eyelid if you have the same surname. If he subsequently finds out, there isn't much he can do about it. The only reasonable objection he could possibly have would be if he suspected you planned to abduct / not return with the children which given that he doesn't see them anyway, isn't a reasonable objection. I'd just book your holiday and tell the kids at the last minute.

CoolforKittyCats Thu 14-Apr-16 07:48:38

You won't need his permission to get through the airport - nobody will bat an eyelid if you have the same surname

Not true.

My DSis has been stopped with her DC and they have the same surname.

crusoe16 Thu 14-Apr-16 09:25:08

Stopped for what?

runningincircles12 Thu 14-Apr-16 09:28:31

crusoe16, he could report her to the police and potentially have her arrested for the offence of child abduction. It's not about whether he can 'reasonably object', it's an offence for the mother to take the children under the age of 16 out of the jurisdiction without the consent of the father or the leave of the court.
Whether she would 'get away with it' is an entirely different matter. She may do, she may not- same with any crime. But I presume she posted on here to get advice on the legalities of what she is planning to do.

CoolforKittyCats Thu 14-Apr-16 09:34:18

Stopped for the reasons running has stated.

She did however have all the correct paperwork and permission so there was no issue.

OllyBJolly Thu 14-Apr-16 09:34:32

I've been stopped a few times travelling with children by immigration at Canada and US and once taken into a room at Toronto for an interview. After the first time, I always carried a letter from my XH saying I had his permission to take the children out of the country.

Ironic, as he had declined parental responsibility and rights and I didn't need his permission but it made life easier. It was never verified - I would show the letter and would be waved on.

I have never been challenged travelling to Europe or Scandinavia.

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