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Help, Have I done the right thing re not following police's advice?

(5 Posts)
itscurtains Sun 02-Dec-12 15:48:44

Will try and keep this short!

Made statement to police about historic abuse by family member. (I confronted some time ago, they denied it). No corroboration / evidence to justify proceeding with an investigation but police dc said they will if I want to. Hmm.
Anyway family member has been persistently sending letters requesting to see my children which I have been ignoring, but they have not stopped. Police say it may be seen as breach of peace and to keep diary recording dates of any calls , letters etc and they will warn them off if it continues to happen. In the meantime they said to ignore the most recent letter. However I feel out of control as this person is not respecting my boundaries, so I have basically written to them to make it clear that I want no contact and reiterated what the police have said re BoP. Completely non threatening in tone, just factual iyswim. Terrified of repercussions now though, I have ignored all contact so far but just can't cope with feeling trod all over by this person. I am sure they will try and discredit me further (have attempted to do so already, but not much I can do about that)
Have I made problems for myself, potentially with the police for writing back to this person stating they don't contact us further?

Thanks for any advice, hoping am worrying over nothing!

OldLadyKnowsNothing Sun 02-Dec-12 23:40:44

I don't think you've created any problems for yourself with the police, but you've given your letter-writer hope/power/control by responding. In future, bin letters without reading. Do not engage with this person at all.

itscurtains Mon 03-Dec-12 15:11:28

Thanks oldlady. This is always the risk isn't it. You would think they'd have got the hint with my lack of response so far though! Police said to keep a diary of anything that happens in the future, if it continues, and let them know. But yes will keep stuff and discuss with police and if not needed as "evidence" I'll bin it.

TrillsCarolsOutOfTune Mon 03-Dec-12 15:15:59

I think the police gave you the right advice, by responding to the person you are likely to encourage them, not discourage them, as they now know that you have read what they have written and they are "in your head".

Don't bin the letters, hand them straight over to the police.

baublesandbaileys Mon 03-Dec-12 15:18:49

I agree that the police gave you the right advice and follow it from now on

if they didn't respond to you speaking volumes by not replying and respect that and stop, then why would you think they would be reasonable enough to respect your reply with request to stop?

Keep everything, with times/dates/etc
don't bin it, you may need it in future!

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