Children

[Zobo1]

My husband left 14 months ago and I found he had been having an affair. He has the children one night a week either fri-sat or sat-sun. Whenever he has them he either gets a sitter that they don't know do he can go out or he takes my boys to his girlfriends house who he was having an affair. This causes emotional distress and anxieties with my children. Can I restrict his access, I am the primary carer and we are due to go to the financial hearing in September please help. I can't deal with this anymore, I am sick and tired of being verbally abused by him. He accuses me of all sorts including that I abuse and scare my boys- that's why everytime they come home they are clingy and have to sleep with me at night for comfort, they are 7&4. He is manipulative and controlling and vile

[AgentProvocateur]

There's two separate issues here; the verbal
abuse to you - which is totally unacceptable - and the overnight situation.

I think that when he has the children, its fine for him to take them to his GF's house or get a babysitter, no matter how much you may not like it. He is their dad, and he doesn't need your permission to take them to stay at someone else's house, just as you don't need his permission to do the same.

Why are your children so distressed when they go to his GF's house? Are they ill-treated there? If not, I don't think you could restrict access

[Zobo1]

They generally don't like her, they just don't want to be there they just want to see their dad and that's it. Sometimes they come home and say they don't want to go again, and we always do what daddy wants to do. Recently my eldest has been saying that daddy scares him when he says he doesn't want to do something