Making a will, instructions ref. life insurance etc

[StellaBrillante]

Hello,

I want to make a will (long overdue) but having never used a solicitor before, I am unsure to what extent my needs can be met and to what cost.

My situation:

• single parent with one 13 year old child
  
• no relatives in this country and only two close friends living in another county
  
• mortgage, house in negative equity (ca. £40k) owned jointly with ex-partner
  
• currently living in rented accommodation (own house rented out)
  
• life insurance of £250k with son as beneficiary (ex-partner still as trustee)
  
• various debts which are being paid off to a total of £8k
  
• ca. £35k redundancy money in various savings accounts
  

My first problem is selecting who to administer the life insurance should anything happen as my son will need this. My ex-partner is trustworthy but it wouldn't be right to expect him to do it (far from ideal), especially since we separated over 2 years ago. I was hoping that for a fee, the solicitor firm could be put down as trustee instead. I have tried the grandparents in Portugal but they are my ex-husband's parents and they failed to complete the form correctly so I have no faith that they will be able to cope with the paperwork etc if needed (and my ex-husband is complete useless and likely to spend all the money on surfboards or the like).

My second problem, and this is outside what I would expect a solicitor to help me with, is what to do with my son? Foster care? I am guessing he'd be able to have a say to some extent? Living with my ex-husband would mean a complete change to his life (new school, new area, new everything) and they are not close (only see each other once every 6 months if as much). I know that I can make a 'wish letter' and possibly leave it with the solicitor but is there more that I can do?

Apologies for the long text and any advice would be much appreciated.

Thank you :-)

[Collaborate]

I suggest you speak to mumblchum, who has an advert in the small business section.

Do you really think your son's father would steal his money in the event that you die? He would seem to be the most obvious person to look after the money.

I wonder whether the best thing to do would be to leave it to your son to decide where he lives if you die. You could never predict how he would feel, and he might rather like the idea of living with his father if he has no one else left in his family.

I take it that your ex partner and your exH are two different people, and it is your exH who is the father.

[StellaBrillante]

My ex-husband and I have been divorced for 11 years. And yes, I think he would spend all the money on himself. This is the same man who left me to repay a joint loan on my own, refused to pay child maintenance until the CSA started collecting from his earnings (whilst boasting about his surfing trips, his new car and house) and even proposed that we sell the fridge/freezer and washing machine and split the money. This is also the same man who hasn't lifted a finger to help me with childcare and who hasn't as much as attended a parents' evening since we separated.

As for my son's choice of who to live with, you are right. He may feel that it'd be best to move to where his dad lives...

Thanks for your response to my post by the way! And I will look up mumblchum :-)

[MOSagain]

I second the recommendation for Mumblechum. Her ad is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/small_business_ads/1507084-MARLOW-WILLS-Professional-Qualified-Will-Writers-Rated-5-by-Mumsnetters

Much better and significantly cheaper service than a High Street Solicitors