CSA ISSUES

[AMummyFromNotts]

Basically put in a claim about an absent father and so on.
Anyways the first claimed made was closed due to lack of information.I then reopened a case again which was due to be closed, however i told them this is his contact number and you shouldn't have any problem contacting him and after a little go at them they then got a result.

Anyways my XP contacted me saying has the CSA been in contact with me in the sense of obviously he thinks he has one on me kind of thing and boasting about the fact no actions has been taken atm.
Anyways i called them to check out what happening and they told me they have all his details etc and my XP is denying he is the father one of those typical scenarios and somone should be in contact to ask further questions.

He isn't on the birth certificate for personal reasons however there no doubt there on both sides about him not being the father,the fact he told an official body that has really annoyed me and thought to think he would pull such a stunt to get out of paying really does disgust me ..esp for my child sake
A part of me is telling me to drop the case and let him go about his business if that his attitude.( and make do with managing myself)
Another part saying stick it out, i have nothing to hide and he should be contributing like every other father does out there.
I know some people reading this come across cases of women falsely accusing men of being the father and i know there are small majorinity of women that just want money and purposely get into such situations.
My situation are none of above and if anything,i never knew things would turn out the they have or i would of avoided the situation in the first place.The breakdown was due to ex inlaws and his childish approach to everything

Anyways it been 6months of managing on my own ,i wasn't exactly thinking about getting the csa involved but since he hasn't showed any financial support i believe it the only option i have to atleast help out a little eventhough it not going 2 be much.Anyways he tried the excuse of i will used the money for myself and all that ,and i told him well i am not asking for cash if that how you feel go out and buy our child the things she needs and he still turned the suggested down as far as i was concerned it eases the pressure of me if he was to buy nappies or other bits my dd needs.

Anyways i haven't spoken to him in a while but i know when this csa business goes through he may start up about contact issues because he paying he assume he should have the right to have contact when he likes etc.


What your advise on handling with the situation ?
How long will the whole process take with the CSA taking into account the stage we already at?
Shall i continue with the csa case or not ?

[STIDW]

No need to get into protracted arguments, let the CSA deal with it. Contact and child maintenance are two separate issues dealt with under separate bits of legislation. Contact is the right of the child, not parents.

Children of separated parents often have poor long term outcomes because of the lack of money so contributing to the costs of raising a child is one of the most important contributions a parent can make to the welfare of their children. When someone claims he isn't the father a DNA test can be carried out as proof one way or another.

The CSA usually deal with claims within 12-13 weeks, although it can take longer when someone isn't PayAsYouEarn.

[balia]

The money is your DD's, she has a right to it, so I think you should continue with the claim. As STIDW says, they will now deal with it and although they are not perfect, worked really well for me and no doubt thousands of others. Detatch from the situation - although you may wish to keep a record of when you have called them, the name of the person you spoke to etc.

Supporting his child does not give him the right to contact, but your child has the right to a relationship with him, so if he does decide he wants to have contact I would recommend mediation.

[Collaborate]

If he disputes paternity with the CSA he has to put his money where his mouth is by paying for a DNA test. If he's not the father he'll get the cost refunded. If he doesn't opt for the test the CSA will proceed as if he is the father.

[st3phani3]

Hi

I'm having some issues with my ex-partner he doesn't pay for our DS who is almost 5years old. He did pay from £40 a month from May of 2009 until Dec of 2009 (pitiful I know).

Its a long story but I have tried to get CSA and had several failed attempts (he reckons he's on JSA and trying to start up a new business, already has clients). Anyways he is not on DS birth certificate (his choice to say no, as he said I could claim CSA if his name was on).

I want whats best for my son and to see his father is a big priority to me. His father is not consistent, does not pay, so I went to my solicitor & got visitation for my son and his father in a contact centre. Still no money from him but the visits we're going well, so after 4month I allowed him over night stays.

My only condition, do not to introduce him to anyone at the minute. Cut a long story short he introduced him to his girlfriend and her son straight away without telling me.

I don't have any hidden agenda, my only priority is my son and he's not happy. I insisted on mediation with him his girlfriend and her son, he said no. So I went back to my solicitor to see if mediation would work again, as I feel he broke our agreement. Around the same time I got a message from my ex saying he will talk to me through lawyers and he is taking me to court!?

To be fair I feel he is having a laugh, am I going crazy here? He doesn't pay, actually he said he won't. He is not consistent, doesn't turn up on time and most of the time my son is lucky if he turns up at all. Although while at the contact centre his time keeping was always perfect.

Does he have a leg to stand on?????

[Collaborate]

You should repost this in its own thread.

[st3phani3]

I made a mistake... he paid from Dec 2009 until May 2010 @ £40 a month...

[TheSockPuppet]

The CSA couldnt find my ex, so after a bit of digging I gave them his work address, phone number, start date, town he lived in, his personal phone number, and his parents address and phone number that he regularly visited and he is on DS's birth certificate.

It took them about a year to manage to get a payment from him and as soon as they did he quit his job so they couldn't take any more payments from him. We were together for 4 years, planning a wedding etc before separating so it isn't a case of just a one night stand or quick fling.

I've given up expecting him to support his son in any way and have just supported him myself, it has been hard but at least I know I can rely on myself as I can't rely on him to help , maybe you should do the same?

[TheSockPuppet]

Sorry I should have worded the bit at the end better, I mean the CSA are still pursuing the case so any extra money is a bonus but I'm not expecting it so I won't be disappointed when child support isn't paid, maybe you should just let the CSA pursue the case but don't expect much so you won't feel let down too IYSWIM?

[st3phani3]

My ex does the same with his jobs. Although the money is not an issue for my me, but it is for my son, he owes him at least that.

But now he wants to take me to court, i'm sure its only to look good in front of his new partner as he has never been bothered before.

Does he have a leg to stand on?