What happens when youre ill?
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(34 Posts)
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Yesterday I started with a fever, bad throat, earache, headache etc and really felt vile. DH knew I wasnt well, knew I was up in the night, taking painkillers and what have you. He never actually says, you stay in bed, I'll take today off and do everything. I have to ask him to do this. He sometimes wont, says its difficult at work etc. Sometimes his employers are a bit obstructive admittedly. I always feel really bad when I have to do this, so I dont do it for nothing.
But there's no way I could do school run get 4 little ones up etc etc. Im propped up in bed now with notebook and feeling truly guilty.
What do you do?
KazKiss is completely right. Until men physically disappear from work to sort out such problems then we will never have true equality. I make my DH do this to set an example to the team (luckily he is of like mind).
Usually when I'm I'll I just have to get on with it, walking a couple of miles in the fresh air on the 3 school runs is usually kill or cure
However a couple of weeks ago I had mastitis over a weekend, my parents had already taken dd's 1&2 for the weekend and the inlaws had already asked for dd's 3&4 for a day so I managed to have a whole day under a blanket on the sofa, I really hadn't ever felt so I'll so it was lovely to be able to hand over to someone else!
Hope you are feeling better OP

oooh not good. Hope all goes well. wishing you a speedy recovery!
Don't be too

in a shortish while I will be off work for 3-6 months for some operations so that will ensure that my average is well and truely up

I have a lovely set of neighbours, a stack of DVDs, and a totally trashed house.....
No I do see your point if it is a regular occurance then arrangements need to be looked into. I personally had a period of long term intermittent illness due to a couple of longterm health conditions (which all fingers and toes crossed seem to have settled down) So I do think it probably depends on the individual. I would say with that record you all have pretty strong constitutions!!!

very jealous.
Hmm.... reading that it is a bit wishy washy in the detail.
It does sound like you are right though, unpaid leave should be allowed for care of a partner in the event of their illness - if there is no other option open to you at all.
I would say that the ops post makes it sound like it happens fairly regularly and therefore it cannot really constitute an actual emergency afer the first few times (ie if she is known to be hit hard by things then some emergency childcare should be investigated and set up)
I think I stick by my original point that I am not surprised the employer is being obstructive about it if it happens relatively regularly. I also stick with the thought that I would not ask a partner to take time off for me in anything other than the most extreme cases!
Mind you I am interested to know how often people actually get really ill - time off work ill I mean. I know I don't get that ill that often, my mother has had 2 weeks off ill her whole working life and my father retired having never had a single sick day. Does that mean we have strong consitutions and do not suffer some of the lower level things that other people do or is that level of (non) sick leave normal?
please excuse poor spelling and grammer this evening as very tired

It is to allow sufficient time to make other arrangements although in certain circumstances, i am not sure what other arrangements can be made. yes a partner wife is a dependant as stated here i quote 'If you are an 'employee', you have the right to unpaid time off work to deal with emergencies involving a 'dependant' this could be your * husband, wife, partner, child, parent *, or anyone living in your household as a member of the family. I am sorry if i made myself misunderstood by using the term self limiting illness, i meant the difference between feeling a bit ill too not able to get out off bed i.e. proper flu such as what bumpybecky was referring to.
I am not sure if that was what the op was asking or not tbh.
So your reading of the policy is that your partner is a dependant and so you can take time off when they are ill?
I am surprised. At least I am if that is correct (and I am not saying it is not).
I also think I sort of disagree with it...because it would be used for self limiting minor illnesses by some people wouldn't it? I can see the point if your partner has something serious but for a 48hr stomach virus or something?