Overwhelmed

(5 Posts)
Aldemar11852 Sun 12-Jun-16 20:13:04

I'm a mother of four children 3 boys 1 girl, youngest boy has extreme behaviour problems 2 years solid of screaming, extreme tantrums, stress stress stress!!! He also has speech delay and attacks myself and his brothers and sister on a daily basis.
My life's turned into a daily grind of Groundhog Day nothing's much fun just stressful. I have so many regrets nothing prepared me for how hard four kids would be!!
I also work a part time job and trying to set up a business. At times I just want to run away and I basically miss me.
I've had a massive cry today as it's just built and built my nerves are on edge I'm fed up and wish I only had 1 child. My partner works long hrs there's never enough money never enough money to go out anywhere as days out with a family of six is immense. They eat me out of house and home crap the house up destroy everything we try to do to the house. No one will ever babysit cos its for four of them!
I'm putting brave face on but inside I feel like I'm drowning under an ocean of responsibility for these four little people who literally suck the life out of me day in day out.

Zippidydoodah Mon 13-Jun-16 16:26:48

Oh bless you!! I've just been posting on a thread I started about trying for number four- I know how hard it would be because we've found having three hard enough!!

Is there any chance something could take a back seat for a while, just while your children are so young? I'm sure that's useless advice- but sending you bucket loads of wine and chocolate

Zippidydoodah Mon 13-Jun-16 16:28:02

Have you hD any support re: your son's speech delay and behaviour? Is he on a waiting list for speech therapy? Could you talk to your hv (if you have a half decent one?!)

mortgagefreesoon5 Sun 03-Jul-16 10:31:27

I only have two small boys and I find it hard enough, so you are a super hero for me. I don't get any help with babysitting and my partner works away so what I do is spend a lot of time outside, rain or shine. The longer we stay in the more mess we create.
Can you invite children over so they invite yours another time? That way you could catch up with sthg.
We live by the sea, so we are really lucky but we also go for country walks and to the park. I always look up for cheap days out, there are free farm days, swimming is also good and relatively cheap with a family pass.
Food and clothing are my priorities. Hunger leads to tantrums. So I always have snacks and drinks in the pushchair, otherwise I travel light.
Slow cooker in the mornin and washing machine on, do the dishes, anything else is a bonus.
I am one of five ( at one point 4 under 5) and routine was the key. We all also had chores to do around the house from a young age

TellMeDani Mon 04-Jul-16 16:21:44

That sounds hard Aldemar11852 , what ages are your older DC? Is your younger one in nursery or do you work opposite hours to your DH? I wish that I had used our local sure start center sooner than I did, they were able to offer support to behavioral issues. I managed to get a Homestart referral somewhere along the way and that was a tremendous help, that might be worth looking into (I'm not sure what they qualifying criteria is) Also, could get some nursery hours and have some time to yourself?

I've recently found a great babysitter who often arrives when there is only 1 DC still awake, it hasn't really mattered that there are 4 of them as luckily they have all more or less stayed asleep...perhaps that could be an option if there was anyone locally.

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