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We have decided to go for a No 4. Positives please

4 replies

BeauticianNotMagician81 · 21/05/2014 07:01

Hi all after much debating DP and I have decided we want a fourth. We get married soon and want to wait until the end of the year to start ttc probably October time. We have a ds9, ds8 and ds1. DP is the biological father to one of the children but a father in every way to all 3. The older two dont have contact with their father.

I just want to hear some positives and tips for coping. DP works away Monday to Friday most months of the year. We rent a property and are saving to buy but its not an absolute must for us. We were looking at getting a 7 seater car soon anyway. We could wait but I don't really want the age gap between the older two and youngest to get much bigger. DP has a reasonably well paid job. I'm working from home at the moment but have two interviews today and next week for more work and ones an informal chat as I already have the job.

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AngelsInWinter · 21/05/2014 20:47

Hey,

Had to reply as I'm in a similar boat. My DP and I are not yet married, about have decided to have a fourth, all going well. My first child is not his but the second two are - hes great with them all though. He also works away lots, although hasn't for a while, touch wood. I only have a 5 seater car, but dont want a 7 seater so will see how that pans out! We rent too. We won't be buying as we don't have a deposit, but renting isnt so bad. I love our house, and at least we don't have to pay for things like boiler repairs or new windows! Anyway...

Are you excited? Nervous? I'm so nervous! A part of me really wants to stick with 3, but I'm only 24 and would love to be pregnant/have a new baby again. Saying that, I get really bad morning sickness so am dreading that while trying to look after 3 others :(

Hope to speak to you soon :)

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BeauticianNotMagician81 · 22/05/2014 09:01

Thanks for your reply. I am excited and nervous. Ds1 was my easiest child and although a great sleeper ds3 can be hard work. So I worry if ill cope especially as I'm alone pretty much mon-fri. But I see the bigger picture and look forward to my big brood around me. When are you planning on ttc. How old are your 3?

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AngelsInWinter · 22/05/2014 12:11

So you have three boys? That's amazing. My friend has 3 boys and I just love seeing the brothers interact.

What is it you like about a big brood? I'm looking forward to simple things like all of us ordering pizza and then watching a film together. Mine are 5, 3 and 18 months.

When are you planning on ttc? Is anything stopping you doing it now? I don't work, I gave up uni to have the girls. There has been the odd time where I've panicked and regretted it but I know I did the right thing - you can't get this time back. We're kind of ttcing now! Yesterday would have been the day I started back on the pill after the week break but I didn't, so we'll see. I think I'll only try for a couple of months though and then stop as I want to avoid a due date between May and January (I know, I'm weird!).

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BeauticianNotMagician81 · 22/05/2014 17:32

I just love the noise of a house full of happy children. Sure there are times they argue but you get that as soon as you have more than one.

I had my first at 23 and my biggest regret is not going to uni although I didn't go due to children it was because I didn't know what to do after school and settled on the college route. I've been debating going back.

I'm waiting to ttc as I have just started a new job and want to find something else to. I just want to make sure we are financially stable. Also I want us to be out of our wedding bubble to make sure it is the right decision for all of us. I just don't feel like I'm done yet.

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