Children sharing rooms?

(47 Posts)
Rtfairy Thu 17-Apr-14 22:03:31

What are your thoughts and opinions on this? I have always wanted 3 children (currently pregnant with DC2) but it is likely that we will only ever be able to afford a 3 bedroom house (currently in a 2 bedroom plus attic). I think it would be acceptable for 2 dcs to share a room but DH thinks we should stop at 2 so nobody has to share. He says this is his only reason and if we could afford a bigger house he would want a bigger family. Wdyt?

CheesyBadger Thu 17-Apr-14 22:06:37

Share definitely. Not a problem in my opinion.

AmandinePoulain Thu 17-Apr-14 22:10:41

We've got 2 dds and 2 bedrooms. They are 6 and 20 months and it's working for us so far! In fact dd2 won't sleep until dd1 is in bed, and dd1 has said even if we had another bedroom she'd still want to share. It's lovely to hear them chattering away at bedtime and in the mornings. I think it helps that we have a playroom downstairs so we've got room for all the toys, and when they're older and want some space one can be upstairs playing and one downstairs. I think at some point we'll look into an attic conversion but not for a good few years, probably when dd1 goes into her teens and wants more privacy. Having two of the same sex means it's less of an issue, although an ex neighbour moved to give her ds and dd a room each and they refused to be separated so they still share grin

2cats2many Thu 17-Apr-14 22:11:20

I shared with two of my sister's when I was young and it was fine. My two share now and they love it. 7 yo DD was reading a bedtime story to 5 yo DS in his bed when I popped my head round the door earlier.

Bluestocking Thu 17-Apr-14 22:13:14

I hate to sound like an old bag but I don't understand this current obsession with providing each child with their own bedroom. Many of my happiest childhood memories are of the nutty stuff my sisters and I used to get up to in our room after lights out - telling stories, sharing playground gossip, singing the latest pop hits in very quiet voices until we were overheard and told to stop it. These are probably my happiest memories of my sisters as children - we used to fight an awful lot, and if we hadn't shared a room we probably wouldn't have any kind of relationship with each other at all now!

my parents had 5 children in a 3 bed house. At one point I was in bunk beds with my sister and my brother was also in the room in his cot. Luckily my oldest brother moved out fairly early so i was left sharing with just my sister and my younger brother went in with my other brother.

Rtfairy Thu 17-Apr-14 22:16:39

Thank you for the quick replies! Will show DH to fight my case although I think he will be convinced eventually smile

MerryMarigold Thu 17-Apr-14 22:18:27

2 of mine share. Friend of mine has 3 boys in master bedroom (now converted into boys' bedroom!), dd in one room and themselves in middle sized room. I think room sharing is a pretty silly reason not to have another child, although there are plenty of other quite sensible considerations (eg. cars, holidays, uni fees etc.).

YoureBeingASillyBilly Thu 17-Apr-14 22:22:57

My two shared until they were 6 and 3 and tbh it was awful. Ds1 hated ds2 having access to all his stuff. He still does even in separate rooms. Ds2 just loved getting stuck into everything and isnt tidy whereas ds1 is. I think it depends on the children themselves. My two just clash and separating them has given me peaceful evenings with no screaming or whingeing.

NachoAddict Thu 17-Apr-14 22:22:59

Share definitely.

I also don't understand the must have own room mentality. I never had my own room growing up and I survived.

We currently have ds1 on his own, dd shares with dsd who is here fri-sun and has her own room the rest off the week. Ds3 is in with us but will soon be going in with the girls, then in a couple of years he will go in with ds1.

Kendodd Thu 17-Apr-14 22:24:29

I have a five bed house and three children, all three for them shared one room for ages, I thought it was lovely. My eldest moved into her own room only because her best friend had her own room. The my second moved out so the youngest had her own room even though she still wanted to share (and still does.) They are gbg btw.

I heard on the radio a while ago that teenagers who share tend to get more sleep because they can't stay up really late on the internet because they'd be disturbing somebody else. Tell him that.

PickledEggMobile Thu 17-Apr-14 22:26:38

My DH grew up in a 3 bed house. He and his brother shared the second double, their sister got the single. Stayed like that until elder brother moved out in his early twenties.

We've got 2 DSs (9 months & 4 years) and a 3 bedroom house. The boys share a room, even though we have an extra room.

DS1 was so excited at the idea of sharing with his brother - he couldn't wait until DS2 was old enough to move in. DH and I like the idea of them sharing a space, and hope it will encourage their friendship in the same way as Bluestocking talks about above.

On a practical level, it works well. If one wakes up, it rarely disturbs the other - they are both used to the noises. It is also quite sweet to see DS1 comfort DS2 if he cries in the morning. DH found them both sitting facing each other in DS2's cot the other morning after DS2 started crying.

Both DSs sleep in the smallest room (just enough room for beds, an Ikea Expedit and some drawers), leaving the middle bedroom free. Before DS2 was born it was a spare room. Now it has a daybed, so can still be used for visitors, but is primarily a playroom.

Maybe you could let your DCs try sharing when DC2 is old enough? You might find that DC1 would prefer it that way smile

jellybeans Thu 17-Apr-14 22:40:25

We have 5 Dc and 3 bedrooms. It's totally fine. They love sharing. Have 3 DS in biggest room in a triple bunk and 2 DDs in next biggest room, plenty of space and own areas. DH and I share the smallest room although it is much bigger than a boxroom. Eldest 2 DDs can always go study in our room if they need peace and quiet or in another room. Only issue is on sleepovers one of them needs to sleep elsewhere but they don't mind and they used to all end up in same room often anyway! I find it makes kids closer. I wouldn't want a bigger house to be honest. We had the opportunity but decided we love our area and would rather live in smaller house in good area.

NothingMoreScaryThanAHairyMary Thu 17-Apr-14 23:01:36

I grew up sharing with my 2 sis's (bunk bed and cabin bed in double bedroom) . We gave a 3 bed house and 3 dc. The 2 smallest share, and love it!

CointreauVersial Thu 17-Apr-14 23:15:47

I shared with DB until I was 12. It was normal.

DD1 and DD2 have their own rooms, but DD2 moves in with DD1 every weekend, by choice. DH keeps threatening to take DD2's room as a study. grin

Lookingforfocus Thu 17-Apr-14 23:32:31

We are moving from a four bedroom house to a three bedroom with 3 kids - we just loved the house we are moving to and wanted to make it work, so our two eldest (girls) ages 13 & 10 will share the master while our son goes in the smallest room and we have the middle room. The girl's needed the master so they could have desks and study space, plus a wardrobe each - we just need space for sleeping and clothes storage. Kids spend a lot more time in their bedrooms than we do. When we first told our DDs they were shocked but the very next day were excited and told us how they had figured out how it would work.

We move next week so I'll let you know how it goes!

my DS and DD shared until Ds was 11, it was fine, when my ex and I split up, I gave DD my room and moved into the lounge, still the set up now, works ok for us.

Rtfairy Fri 18-Apr-14 08:22:58

Thank you for mostly confirming what I thought already. I think I can easily convince dh to have one more smile

Oopssaidtoomuch Fri 18-Apr-14 08:27:25

I'm a big fan of young kids sharing, but around 10yrs ours really started to want their own space. So we did move to a bigger house.
But, I definitely think it's really good for kids to share - and have happy memories of sharing with my sister.

blueshoes Fri 18-Apr-14 09:10:55

We have a 5 bed house and dd 10 and ds 7 still share a room. Ds has his own bedroom but they treat dd's bigger room and double bed as theirs. I agree with other posters that it makes the children closer - dd and ds are as thick as thieves.

I used to co-sleep (extended bf-ing) with each of them and they are used to sleeping with another person in their bed. In fact, that is all they have ever known.

mummyOF4darlings Sat 19-Apr-14 23:28:19

Nothing wrong with sharing, i know some people look down on it but so be it. My friend and her OH bought a 3 bed a couple of years ago when she got pregnant with their 2nd, shes now just found out pregnant again and they are in this mad panic to find a 4 bed now by time babies born its like its the worse thing in the world to share both her and her OH are only childs so i guess its hard for them to understand really but most parents dont have that luxury they have.

Growing up there was 3 of us in 1 room ill be honest and admit i hated it when i was getting older but thats life isnt it. I have 2 ds and 2 dds and im in a 3 bed got 2 in each room

mumeeee Mon 21-Apr-14 23:19:11

I have 3 DDs and all 3 shared until the oldest was about 12 or 13. She was offered her own room when whe was 10 but didn't want to leave her sisters.!

weatherall Thu 24-Apr-14 12:49:08

Do people have experience of teenagers sharing with toddlers?

We might end up in this situation depending on sex of potential next DC.

We have a 11yo DS and 6yo DD atm, planning to ttc in a few months.

If another DD can share with DD, fine.

But what if it's a DS? Share with DD until she's 10? Then what? Put a 3yo in with a 15yo? I really dont think that'd be fair. We private rent so could get a 4 bed for a couple of years then downsize again when DS moves out. Not sure there's another reasonable solution, that doesnt involve us sleeping in living room!

ABeautifulLie Thu 24-Apr-14 16:55:42

My DS-2 shares with my DS-16.
DS has his own desk in the dining room if he needs to study after his younger brother has gone to bed.
DS-2 only sleeps in the room and stores excess toys. He plays downstairs, although DS-16 is happy enough to look after him in their bedroom if I'm busy.
We are able to split the room into 2 as it has 2 windows and is. suitable shape, but they're happy as they are for now.

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