I'm Jealous....and I hate it!!!

[Zola78]

I just need to off load and I'm not sure I've chosen the right forum but here goes. My sister in law announced last week that she's pregnant with her 3rd child. Her oldest is 2 & 9 months, 2nd 8 months and the the new one due in march. I'm happy for her but soooo jealous.

I have 4 children and I've had them in 5 years. I'm a stay at home mum and I love it most days. I think I'm jealous because she's got a successful career and now her 3rd and I don't. I'm suppose to be the one with the big family that's my thing but now she has it and a career. I wish this feeling would go but it hasn't yet.

[verybusyspider]

just a big hug for me - its irrational but I know what you mean, I have my 3, umming and ahhing over having number 4 but I know my SIL is planning number 3 and I hate idea she will be pregnant when I'm not... can't justify it, love her loads but I think sometimes the grass always seems greener x

[FetchezLaVache]

Have you talked to her about it? You never know, maybe she's jealous of you for being able to stay at home with your little ones!

[mollycuddles]

Zola - do try to speak to her if you can. I have a very successful career and I'm off on maternity leave with dc3. I wish I could be a sahm or even work part time but not possible because dh is at home. I'm sure there are people who look at me and think I have it all.

[Zola78]

I want to talk to her but she's not very discreet and I'm sure that our conversation would reach the ears of other people in the family. In the past she has implied that I'm lazy for not working etc and now shes got two and pregnant with 3 I'm sure she doesn't view me the same way but I'm still hesitant.

The problem is with me and my self esteem. I do a valuable job but I never give myself credit and neither does my sil. Funny because If I only had 2 children I'd still want to be at home with them but yet ......I don't know I feel like I need to justify my position when I really don't. My dh is happy as are the children most of the time!!!

I'm gonna have to ride the storm and pray for the best.

[MUM2BLESS]

Are you feeling better today Zola78?

Being a mother is an important job. I gave up work when my 2nd (now 12) was almost due. I did not start work again unti 2008 as a childminder.

Sometimes I see mothers dressed up when they either drop off or pick up their chidlren at school(working). Sometimes things may not always be as glamorous as they look for working mothers. I also see mothers who seem stressed doing both. whether you are a sahm or working outside the home you still have an important job to play in the role of your family.

Do you get any time for yourself? How do you treat yourself? You are so special and please do not forget that, send you a hug. Just be happy for your sister in law. She perhaps may admire what you do too.

All the best

[Zola78]

Thank you sooo much MUM2BLESS. I think I really needed to hear that. I am feeling better about the situation. Still a bit wobbly but in general....much better.

[MUM2BLESS]

Your welcome, great thats what I like to hear