Starting PGD/IVF and feeling anxious

[3ndlessdreamz]

Hello, I'm hoping to get some support and advice here.
My DH and I are starting the PGD/IVF process, and we're meeting the gynaecologist in a few weeks time. I'm just a bit anxious about it all :(
Because we've been told that we're only going to get 1 cycle funded (no way we can afford private) and only 1 embryo implanted, I'm worried about me not responding to the hormone treatments, then we're back to square one.
DH also suffers from delayed ejaculation and we've been TTC since May last year and no luck. On top of all this I've been feeling quite jealous towards my friends that had babies and/or pregnant. Not only that, the pregnancy/baby conversation always comes up at family gatherings, as CIL has had a baby in July. MIL has been wanting to see CIL and their baby every week, and openly invited them to Sunday dinner every week. There's just no escape :(

[zoobyzoo]

Sorry to hear about your struggles. Sadly I can't offer any first hand experience (I haven't even started ivf yet) but I can empathise. It's impossible to avoid baby talk sometimes, just know that it's ok to feel how you feel. I don't think anyone with an ounce of compassion would blame you for feeling like that. Does anyone else in the family know you're having fertility treatment?

[3ndlessdreamz]

Hi Zoobyzoo,
Yes MIL knows she's the one who asked the neurologist to refer DH to genticist in the first place. I'm grateful that we're having PGD as part of IVF which means we skipped the step of having to go to fertility clinic first.
But like I said, MIL wants to see CIL's baby every week and is always asking to see her more often if possible. Every time MIL mentions it just reminds me of what I'm struggling with :(
Have you been to fertility clinic? What's it like? We might need to make a trip there if the PGD doesn't work :')

[zoobyzoo]

Nope, first appointment today (see thread in this forum, "advice for newly infertile" a few below this one) so I can't tell you anything :(

Is it worth talking to your mil about struggling a little with being around babies? Would she be sympathetic?

[3ndlessdreamz]

Hi Zoobyzoo,
Good luck!! Hope it goes well! Fingers crossed for you! Xxx
Well there's been many times I've been wanting to tell her, but I just don't have the heart to :') she looks too happy when the baby's around :')

[zoobyzoo]

I'm sure she'd rather know that you're struggling than have you suffering alone in silence :( It can be a very lonely time, so a supportive family member could be a blessing? Hope it goes well xxx

[MoosicalDaisy]

When you are going through IVF, you are monitored to make sure you are reacting to the hormones appropriately, so they will up or reduce your dose as required. Stress is a key factor towards IVF not working, so i'd recommend you work on reducing that as much as possible. Follow the clinics advice and you'll be fine. You only need one embryo for it to work :)
It's hard not being jealous, i understand, sometimes you just have to blank it/them. Especially when they can behave very thoughtless at times, and they have no problems themselves. Don't be scared to say you can't see x this weekend. Sometimes you'll love to see them, sometimes you'll hate it. If you only have one shot, it's time to be selfish for a while.

[Sweetdee6]

Hi 3ndlessdreamz,

Being anxious about this is totally normal, I'm starting my first cycle IVF/PGD on wednesday and at times it does overwhelm me with anxiety but I have to say ( based on MoosicalDaisy's post) that I have been told by numerous doctors that stress does NOT affect the outcome of an IVF cycle. Of course its always better to be calm (it always is!) but stress does not impact whether or not an embryo sticks or the quality of the eggs you produce. Try doing things that help take your mind off of it for your own sanity - my go to's are puzzles, movies and drawing!

Goodluck and positive thinking!! xx

[Pharaohhoundbek]

Hey Sweetdee6

I’ve just started hormone treatment for PGD- how did you get on?

[isthismummy]

MoosicalDaisy Stress does NOT affect ivf outcomes, nor indeed does it contribute to infertility.

Unfortunately the viewpoint that it does is very prevalent and unhelpful.

[Notifbutwhen]

Hi all,

I have been through PGD last year and after a FET in Nov17 had a BFN in Dec17.

I had my follow up appointment in Jan 18 and was also told that stress would not have contributed to my negative result (being a stressed person and been through stressful PGD).

At the moment feel very alone wanted someone to talk to who know's what I am going through came across this post. Really don't know what to do with myself.

I still have 3 frozen unaffected embryos, want to start again but can't as still feeling the loss of the first one.

Any advice would be much appreciated. xx