Donor egg vs adoption

(13 Posts)
Kerrigan90 Tue 04-Dec-12 10:10:05

5madthings that good to know as the gyno at the private hospital we attended told us UK donor eggs are in short supply and our best bet would be to go abroad.

Thanks QOD, I think I'm still getting my head around the genetic links thing but everyone seems to unconditionally love and bond with their babies.

Thanks Kewcumber, it is my thread in adoptions. Some of the ladies there suggested I post here in infertility as may get diff views.

Kerrigan x

Kewcumber Sat 01-Dec-12 23:16:41

Have a look in "adoptions" - I think there's a couple of threads about this relatively recently.

QODRestYeMerryGentlemen Sat 01-Dec-12 23:14:18

Nice one 5mad!

5madthings Fri 30-Nov-12 22:13:41

No advice but i donated eggs this yr and my egg recipient is pregnant with twins!

Just so you know there are people out there who are happy to donate inthe uk and good outcomes smile

QOD Fri 30-Nov-12 22:09:58

In effect my dd is a donor egg (straight surrogacy) and its perfect. She's been mine since conception and we would never have had an adopted baby from birth

Kerrigan90 Fri 30-Nov-12 22:06:16

Thanks for that. Thanks for sharing It's good to hear real life. My diagnosis is still pretty new and find it frustrating friends with families all knowing someone who was told they were infertile but the docs got it wrong! I'm sure they mean well. Lots of research on the horizon. x

colafrosties Fri 30-Nov-12 21:40:38

Kerrigan, we did a lot of searching online really, DP set about it very systematically which helped as I didn't have a clue where to start. We decided to pick a few clinics fron potential locations - Spain, Czech, Russia and emailed them a list of questions about prices, waiting times, success rates etc. All quite confusing but gradually homed in on Reprofit clinic in Brno, especially once I had come across the threads on it on fertility friends and realised that a lot of people were going there.

Anyway, just realised you might have meant how did I "find" it (rather than "find out about it") - in some ways I would have preferred an egg donor from the UK, so that any potential DC could find out about the donor later on (we decided early on we would tell the truth about donor conception). But went abroad for shorter waiting lists as I was 45 at the time. So the donation is anonymous, and hopefully DS won't mind too much about not being able to track down the donor, aat least we can tell him which country they were from.

I did feel a bit strange about using a donor egg at first but DP was fine about it and that helped me get used to the idea. That and the prospect of 30% success rate compared with less than 1% with my own eggs. Going abroad was fine once I knew that others had done it - again it was the fabulous fertility friends website which gave me the confidence to give it a go. Don't want to keep going on too long(!), but very happy to answer any questions you might have xx

Kerrigan90 Fri 30-Nov-12 18:28:10

Lozter I wasn't best impressed! Yeah I'm going to check out fertility friends. The genetics link is something we've spoken about too, still coming to terms that it won't be my genetics but at least it would be DH's. I've not yet done research in to sourcing an egg thought egg sharing may be an option and have ruled out using my cousins egg. Colafrosties how did you find using an egg from abroad? x

Kerrigan90 Fri 30-Nov-12 18:28:02

Lozter I wasn't best impressed! Yeah I'm going to check out fertility friends. The genetics link is something we've spoken about too, still coming to terms that it won't be my genetics but at least it would be DH's. I've not yet done research in to sourcing an egg thought egg sharing may be an option and have ruled out using my cousins egg. Colafrosties how did you find using an egg from abroad? x

delilahbelle Thu 29-Nov-12 16:11:30

We are starting a donor egg cycle in the NY. We have chosen this over adoption for a few reasons - DH really worried about bonding, and this will give him the genetic link. I wanted to experience pregnancy and birth, and also the knowledge we would be unlikely to be able to adopt a young baby.
PM me if you want x

colafrosties Thu 29-Nov-12 14:56:37

Sorry to hear that Kerrigan. Just wanted to say that we have a DS from a donor egg (from clinic in the Czech Republic) as I my eggs were not up to it - due to age in my case. We didn't consider adoption, again due to age, would have been unlikely to have adopted a baby or young child. We've been very lucky but I would certainly consider donor eggs as a real possibility. Fertility Friends, great website for all this, as lozster says.

lozster Wed 14-Nov-12 22:26:42

Kerrigan you are obviously more patient than me because if my GP had said that to me I would either have cried or been moved to violence. Perhaps both.

I would recommend that you have a browse on fertility friends. There are specific boards on there for DE and adoption. They unpack most of the issues which are complex so it's a good place to do your research.

Kerrigan90 Wed 14-Nov-12 21:10:26

Hi ladies,

I had posted this in the adoption section and it was suggested I post here too to maybe get some views/opinions/experiences of ladies who know about or have used donor eggs, adopted or both.

My eggs are pretty much rendered useless and my options given are use donor eggs or adopt (or as my GP suggested just be favourite auntie and have good holidays!).

Thanx, Kerrigan.

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