How do you keep going month after month?

(28 Posts)
howdoikeeponsmiling Wed 28-Mar-12 09:56:07

So my husband and I have been TTC for almost a year now without success. Whilst I know this is not as long as many others, I do not hold out much hope of us being able to conceive naturally. My DH has a 5 year old daughter from a previous relationship who was conceived via IVF, I have PCOS and he has a low sperm count at a level that the fertility consultant said was unlikely to result in us conceiving (this was based however on one test, my DH has done another since the results of which we will get at my next appointment in June).
In the last three weeks alone one friend has had a baby and three other friends / work colleagues have announced they are expecting. I want to feel happy and pleased for them but to be honest I feel sad and hurt that it is not me. My DH is of the what will be will be and we shouldn't worry about anyone else camp. He thinks I am beating myself up over it and should just relax and be positive. I can't do this, everywhere I turn I am confronted by everyone elses ability to fall pregnant at the drop of a knicker whilst we carry on month by month getting nowhere in the knowledge that we have pretty much nothing in our favour.
I suppose this is a question with no real answer, but I would be interested to hear how you cope with this without falling apart.

amandine07 Wed 10-Oct-12 20:20:59

Hi everyone, I've just been reading through this thread and I think I'll be directing a close friend of mine here- she and DH have been trying for over 3 years now and have just had a failed first round of IVF.

At times I just don't know what to say to her to make her feel better, a lot of your posts have given me a real insight into how it feels to have infertility problems.
I don't have children-yet- although the clock has started ticking very loudly and I'm a bit freaked out that we will have fertility problems...
I'm not sure why, I'm going to be 35 next year so that plays heavily on my mind...one thing I take from these posts is that I shouldn't dwell on the not havnot starting to TTC

amandine07 Wed 10-Oct-12 20:22:25

* not having children or even seriously considered TTC yet.

MistressofPemberley Sun 04-Nov-12 20:25:59

I've had a bit of a "fuck it" month, after convincing myself I was pregnant last month. Ttc #2. Have a 4yo son. Over the last 3 years I've had 2 mcs, 1 cp, 8 months acupuncture and healthy eating/no booze. DH and I are just back from a weekend away. We gorged ourselves on seafood, including raw oysters and lobster, rare steak, our body weight in booze (seriously, seriously rough today), and loads of spontaneous, non-scheduled sex. Such fun!!
Back on the healthy once my next cycle starts but BOY it felt good to be so rebellious. This ttc lark is making me so stressed and so bloody boring, it felt so good to just say fuck it!

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