I 'm just so devastated having seen, without warning, pictures of a dying child being carried into A & E by her abuser.

(56 Posts)
potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 21:17:48

I had no idea of the full story at all until I had read the story. I'm horrified obviously by the story - but by the Daily Mail (I know - I was looking at it) I won't be looking at the site again. Why? Four different views...

That poor poor child - but I'm just so appalled by the paper. They are using the shot as the headline picture - you don't have to click on the story to see it.

NickNacks Fri 25-Jan-13 21:19:34

You've done the same thing though...

Used a shocking title to get people to read it.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 21:25:08

There was no title before the picture was there. But - you know - thanks.

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 21:27:26

Obviously I wish I hadn't posted. Yes - sorry if you feel all pedantic about the word I chose.

SolomanDaisy Fri 25-Jan-13 21:31:23

Do you have a new born? It's normal to feel a bit irrational, hormonal and hypersensitive.

Wow. Heartless fuckers on this thread. Op I know how you feel, I can't bear it when i see things like that. Just keep away from rags like the DM in future to avoid!

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 21:39:29

Yes. Probably easily-floored. I'll keep it to myself next time x

I have seen it. It is just there on the dm website so you can't miss it.

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 21:47:44

I was not looking for upsetting or grim stories - just idly looking whilst feeding my baby.

McPhee Fri 25-Jan-13 21:50:15

I saw it too

Sadly the press have no idea about inappropriateness sad

SolomanDaisy Fri 25-Jan-13 22:29:43

I guessed straight away that you had a new born. I could basically only watch the vicar of dibley and read the chalet school. It will pass.

OldBagWantsNewBag Fri 25-Jan-13 22:41:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheNebulousBoojum Fri 25-Jan-13 22:44:08

'I was not looking for upsetting or grim stories - just idly looking whilst feeding my baby.'

On the DM website? You lack judgement, there are other sites to look at when you are bored. The story is horrific, but of course it would be sensationalised by certain papers. That's what they are famous for. hmm

Offs knew I shouldn't have read that, poor baby

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 22:51:06

Yes - got it. Still surprised by harshness. I won't be looking again / hadn't much before. No room for everyone not being as up-to speed as everyone else I guess

ClaimedByMe Fri 25-Jan-13 22:53:21

The same picture is on sky news website too and probably on others, I chose not to read the story as I knew it would be upsetting and I don't have a newborn

herladyship Fri 25-Jan-13 22:54:32

I don't know the story but I'm a wimp sensitive when it comes to news stories & my dc are 18 & 12! So I empathise thanks

ouryve Fri 25-Jan-13 22:57:02

Not looked. Sounds like an awful story and very upsetting for anyone feeling a bit hormonal or sensitive.

Not looked, but I agree that pictures are unnecessary. Most people would be quite upset enough just finding out, or even having confirmed, that it happens, without visual "evidence". DM like to go for the OMG market, though.

Chrestomanci Fri 25-Jan-13 23:01:40

The picture upset me too OP <hugs> I have a fairly new baby as well and I can't read the DM at all at the moment because they are always publishing very upsetting stories on the front page (other news websites I look at don't seem to as much). I'm trying to look at this as a good thing as I hope it will cure my sidebar-of-shame habit...

Reassured that people say that the sensitivity passes a little as I worry about how I'll cope when I go back to work?!

HyvaPaiva Fri 25-Jan-13 23:02:21

I just don't get threads like this, I don't understand why you feel the need to start a thread like this. Obviously the devastation is the abuse and death of a child. You are 'devastated' not simply by the facts of the child's murder but specifically because you 'saw pictures without warning'? hmm

TheNebulousBoojum Fri 25-Jan-13 23:08:20

She had warning, it was the DM.
That's like reading Nuts magazine and being shocked by the sexism....without warning.

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 23:09:15

You're right - but was shocked and upset by use of images too - have not seen such before & was unaware that a & e CCTV was just there on homepages.

potatofactory Fri 25-Jan-13 23:12:39

I won't be looking again so warning heeded now.

Why does the OP get a pasting for being shocked and upset by something that is in fact shocking and upsetting hmm. It's not like she's upset over Bog Brother or who got nominated for an Oscar. Give her a break.

threesocksmorgan Fri 25-Jan-13 23:19:37

op some things we see are so shocking to us, we have to share.
I havn't seen it, but have a hug

scarlettsmummy2 Fri 25-Jan-13 23:21:32

I just saw cctv footage of it on the northern Ireland news. So horrendous. I hope that man never sleeps with both eyes closed again.

TheNebulousBoojum Fri 25-Jan-13 23:22:24

I don't want her to be shocked and upset, especially as she ought to be happily snuggled up with her baby and thinking happy thoughts, rather than stumbling across truly wicked and evil things to read on the net and worry about.
The DM is a vile paper and to be avoided by anyone with any level of sensitivity.

FunnysInLaJardin Fri 25-Jan-13 23:27:20

lol soloman when I had had my first MMC all I could watch was the vicar of dibley. Everything else was like an arrow to the heart grin

SolomanDaisy Sat 26-Jan-13 08:47:12

FunnysinLaJardin, strangely enough I discovered Vicar of Dibley after a miscarriage, that's how I knew it would be ok with a new born!

pinkhousesarebest Sat 26-Jan-13 10:00:40

I don't think it does pass, that incredible empathy to suffering. There's a trial taking place this week (not in the UK) involving a child, and I cannot get it out of my head.

Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 10:16:02

the picture has been used by just about every news outlet.

And shocking stories like this should be carried, not buried away to protect the sensitivities of others.

There are children being beaten and abused every day in the UK. People should be aware.

OldBagWantsNewBag Sat 26-Jan-13 10:38:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 10:43:38

It's brought home what manipulative liars abusers can be.

It might make some mothers think twice about leaving their kids alone with men they barely know.

Who knows?

But I'd rather people read about these things than didn't.

jaffacake2 Sat 26-Jan-13 10:49:45

The upset is that the child died not that you happened to notice it on the headlines.
Statistics show that on average 4 children die a week at the hands of their family due to neglect or abuse in this country.
That is the shocking headline and maybe with greater awareness then all people could be looking out and reporting concerns.
The neighbours of this poor child may have heard her screams and not done anything about it.
Headlines which shock may bring about a change of attitude in society so that child abuse is everyones responsibilty to act to protect.

OldBagWantsNewBag Sat 26-Jan-13 10:53:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pagwatch Sat 26-Jan-13 10:56:07

I'm with Nancy about awareness.

I never cease to be staggered at how ill informed people are about abusers.

The ridiculous notion that abusers look like dirty old men and hang around playgrounds leaves thousands of children vulnerable.
The number of threads where people blithering on about a socially awkward bloke giving them the creeps while wanting new boyfriends to be quickly enveloped into the family because they love the kids drives me batty.

Abusers are ordinary. They wear nice clothes, watch the football, make you laugh. That's how they do what they do.

JumpingJackSprat Sat 26-Jan-13 10:57:06

i dont know why people are getting at you for posting. its hardly irrational to be upset about that photo. as for saying she shouldnt look on the daily mail well maybe we should be asking why they are allowed to use pictures such as that to sell the news. i dont have anything to do with the daily mail since i saw a news story about a girl killed by a driver and they had photos of the girl being worked on by paramedics... i mean come on in what fucking world is that ok?!? i also judge people who use the site or read the rag.

BornInACrossFireHurricane Sat 26-Jan-13 10:57:14

I felt the same OP.

My children are 20 months so I'm not sure if that contributes but I just couldn't stop thinking about that poor little girl last night.

I hope the vile bastard meets a horrible end in prison.

TheCrackFox Sat 26-Jan-13 11:07:11

I found it very upsetting too and my youngest is nearly 8 yrs old.

I have to agree with Nancy that, hopefully, it will make parents think more about who they leave their children with. Paedophiles don't all look and act like Jimmy Saville.

SolomanDaisy Sat 26-Jan-13 11:55:12

Oh, I agree an increased empathy and sensitivity, particularly to issues involving children, tends to stay. But that overwhelming sensitivity and vulnerability you get when you have a small baby tends to go. Increased empathy doesn't always stay either, just check out AIBU!

MrsDeVere Sat 26-Jan-13 12:01:17

Sorry what?
I don't get the meanness towards the OP at all!
The picture if fucking offensive and inappropriate.

It serves no purpose but to titillate the masses. It should not be on a mainstream site with no warning. It should not be anywhere.

That child has a right to dignity and what about the child's family? Seeing their dying grandchild (for e.g.) dying on the fucking internet for all to see?

The way the press treat bereaved families is utterly reprehensible.

Reporting the story is one thing. Illustrating it is quite another.

eminemmerdale Sat 26-Jan-13 12:07:15

Sorry but how the fuck did the childs mother not notice? I have read it all and surely she must have realised her little girl was systematically being hurt?

MrsDeVere Sat 26-Jan-13 12:08:15

If the police thought that they would have prosecuted her wouldn't they?

eminemmerdale Sat 26-Jan-13 12:09:38

I guess so, but it still baffles me.

Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 12:10:05

the mother was charged with wilful neglect but found not guilty - which is pretty staggering when you read the list of injuries to the child.

I wondered the same, 7 healing breaks to the ribs yet noone noticed.

QuickLookBusy Sat 26-Jan-13 13:31:14

Agree with MrsDeVe.
That photo should not have been published. It's horrible for her family.

I very much like to know how the press got hold of it.

MrsDeVere Sat 26-Jan-13 13:36:08

That is a point. It is cctv footage. Shame on the fucker who sold it to them.

QuickLookBusy Sat 26-Jan-13 13:37:24

Yes, makes me very angry. They probably got a couple of hundred quid.


Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:39:24

it was used as evidence in court and, therefore, I imagine released by the police.

QuickLookBusy Sat 26-Jan-13 13:42:36

I don't think the police usually release photos of a murder victim as they are dying.

Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:45:21

The police release all sorts of material.

QuickLookBusy Sat 26-Jan-13 13:54:06

I'm sure they do but this photo isn't typical of one published in a paper.

So either the police shouldn't have given it to the press as its not appropriate or someone else sold it to the press.

Flickstix Sat 26-Jan-13 13:56:10

I was really distressed after seeing that picture, God only knows how the family must feel about it. I think it's utterly inappropriate to publish it in a newspaper or on the internet.

Nancy66 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:57:11

It looks like it was distributed by a news agency in northern ireland.

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