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Cluttered house driving me mad!

15 replies

WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 25/09/2016 15:49

Our house is so messy and cluttered at the min and I feel completely overwhelmed by it all. Every room, kids rooms, living areas, kitchen and front entrance - where everyone just dumps their stuff - is really getting me down. I do try and keep on top of it and instill this into my kids too (11, 10 & 5) but I constantly feel like I'm wading through treacle and no one takes any notice. It's getting me down so much and turning me into a complete nag tbh. So, because I'm feeling so overwhelmed at where to start I am seriously considering just having a total sweep of everything and donating/chucking out relentlessly just to clear the decks, reasoning that if I did regret letting anything go it would be easier, and kinder on my sanity, to just buy it again as hopefully those things would be very few, if any.
Then (again hopefully) I could begin afresh with a clean slate and keep it that way.

Has anyone else done this and, if so, how did it work out and did it make you feel better?

Looking forward to replies, TIA! Smile

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BzyB · 25/09/2016 15:54

Was just saying to some friends that I'd love to get a skip and fill it!
But when it actually came down to it is prob not be able to let go that easily.

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bearleftmonkeyright · 25/09/2016 15:56

I got rid of a load of stuff over the holidays in a big frenzy of chucking. Loads of books, DVDs and o!d games went to the chazza shop and the rest got taken to the tip. I got rid of six bags of clothes as well. Just go for it, involve the kids and of they don't want to know then it's their fault if it goes. Start with clothes, just get bin liners, start piling in all the outgrown clothes, shoes that never get worn, (in pairs obvs) and get to chazza shop or clothes bank as soon as you can. Then start on rest.

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Onlytimewilltell · 25/09/2016 16:10

I think decluttering is a constant thing. I have actually had my own skip before, (Dh regularly hires them for DIY projects and I get rid of a few sackfulls that way), but I hired one all to myself which felt great at the time, but unfortunately the clutter does creep back in (buying too many toys is my problem!). It does feel good to go round like a mad thing and just clear everything in your path. I don't think I've ever really regretted chucking anything.
Kids stuff I put in the loft for several weeks and if they miss something I can sneakily retrieve it, but 99% of the time they don't even notice it's gone.
We did a car boot in June and my youngest pulled back a dress up outfit that she still wanted, but she hasn't worn it since! So that will be going back in my getting rid pile. So I tend not to take them too seriously when they want to keep something now.
Do a sweep, it will make you feel good, but maybe start with the replaceable stuff like tupperware, don't do sentimental stuff when you are feeling really frustrated with clutter as when you've calmed down you might find yourself rummaging about in the bin for it or is that just me Grin

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Onlytimewilltell · 25/09/2016 16:16

Just to add, make sure there are places for everything - we have a built in coat cupboard but bizarely it's not by the front door and we'd get an unsightly pile of dumped stuff on the bannisters, so I bought a coat stand to put right next to the door, also a small set of drawers to house gloves, hats, Dh's keys and wallet etc. So our hallway looks show homey now!

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Topseyt · 25/09/2016 16:21

I have to have the odd major chucking out session because I end up with much the same problem as you, with everyone just dumping their stuff as they come in. DH is the worst offender by far.

They get a warning to move it or I will bin it. Sometimes it works. Sometimes I have to remind firmly and insist that I will follow through if necessary.

So far the only time I did have to follow through (after much cajoling nagging and countless warnings) was with DH's "Ebay Corner" project. This was a massive pile of all sorts of worthless shit bric-a-brac from which he was going to make his fortune on EBay. It sat there for over two years and the rest of us got so fed up of it and of him doing nothing about it that DD2 helped load it all into my car whilst he was at work and she came with me to help with the ceremonial offloading it at the dump.Grin

DH was quiet about it but then accepted it.

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WhispersOfWickedness · 25/09/2016 16:25

You need Marie Kondo and her book, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Smile
You don't have to follow her technique to the letter, but the way she talks about 'stuff' has made a massive difference to the way I see clutter and has made it so much easier to let go of things Smile

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jimjimjamming · 25/09/2016 16:46

I am pretty ruthless about chucking out these days. What makes it easier is not buying stuff to start with. I try to pause before a purchase and ask 'do we really want or need this?', quickly followed by 'would you prefer to save the money?'. I follow whatever my small spidey voice tells me. Win win, works a treat. I always go to the supermarket with a list. Approach Ikea visit with caution & iron determination to only buy what is on the list printed from website. That place is shocking Shock. If there's something I need to find, online shopping saves time & the temptation that comes of browsing around the shops of a weekend. I came about this system after getting overwhelmed with clutter & needing to sort out my finances. I'm not an obsessively tidy or organised person & there are a couple of cupboards and drawers in the house containing redundant crap. But mostly everything has a place. Life's so much calmer (and richer) now I've figured this out SmileSmileSmile

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WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 25/09/2016 17:19

Wow, loads of great advice and encouragement on here too started two threads as impatient/desperate. Thanks so much everyone, please keep them coming as it's really helping! Smile

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Trickymoments · 25/09/2016 17:43

Where did you post the other thread Cuckoo? I need as much help and advice as I can get!
We have stuff all over the place but I am getting more ruthless and chucking stuff out gradually.
My main problem is finding undisturbed time to do it. I'm either at work, at home with demanding dc or knackered and ready for bed.
As a result I have lots of unfinished clutter piles around the house which adds to the chaos. I start something & never finish it! I find it stressful when dc then come along & want to 'help' or start playing with a pile of crap they haven't played with in years! It's hard to make progress.

How/when do people do their sorting & decluttering.

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Letmesleepalready · 25/09/2016 18:03

I'm waiting for the kondo book, hoping it'll get here tomorrow.
Need to sort the DCs clothes as their chest of drawers are full!
Just went through my books and got rid of a lot. Apparently getting tipsy then angry about the state of the house helps being a bit more ruthless Grin

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Bluecarrot · 25/09/2016 20:48

I'm the same Tricky.
I now have permanent boxes - one set under the stairs, and one set upstairs in my wardrobe - for donate and return ( to shop or rightful owner). The donate boxes get sealed and placed in the car when full and I'll drop it off next time I'm passing. I also have an easy filing system which is a cereal box and I just put all paperwork in there. I write the month I start it on the front, and then when it's full I write the end date and start a new box.
IF it needs dealt with ( Bill, letter from school) it gets done straight away. If it needs done in a few days - like call after the weekend- it goes on the fridge.

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Bluecarrot · 25/09/2016 20:49

I also do challenges with friends and that keeps us motivated. I surprise myself about how competitive I can be!

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bearleftmonkeyright · 25/09/2016 21:24

I found fly lady helpful to get me started. Just doing a couple of minutes clearing of one zone that accumulates clutter makes a massive difference. She calls these areas hot spots. I have certain areas in my house where everything collects. Cleaning your kitchen.sink, making your bed every day and taking baby steps. She also suggests setting your timer for 15 minutes to clear a space, not getting more out to sort than you can clear away in that time. It helped me get on top anyway when I was struggling and feeling low.

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ChocolateForAll · 25/09/2016 21:46

Another vote for kondo from me. There is a Facebook group called konmari UK which is really good for tips etc. I didn't follow it to the letter but am constantly decluttering/organising when I can. The trick is definitely less stuff and a place for everything.

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WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 26/09/2016 09:04

Tricky I posted the other thread in chat - some great ideas on there too. Good luck from hoarder to another Smile

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