Single parents - how do you make life work?

(9 Posts)
carriemumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 22-Jul-08 12:00:51

First off, huge apologies that some of you felt excluded from the survey. The idea of the survey was to get a picture of the division of labour between partners and how this worked.

This does not mean, however, that the views of single parents and their experiences are not valid/a useful part of the debate and it would be great if you could share your tips on how you make life and work and family work for you and what, if anything, could be done to make that easier.

Over to you

Kewcumber Tue 22-Jul-08 12:03:58

I don't have a problme with a questionnaire to acertian the division of labour bewteen partners, it just wasn't billed as that and I wouldn't filled it in if I'd known it wasn't aimed at me.

Kewcumber Tue 22-Jul-08 12:06:01

My tips are based aprtly on good luck.

- good extended family support
- good and flexible childcare
- try to develop a network of single parent friends for support (I'm still working on this)
- despite what cod says ... lower your housekeeping standards.

I have a very good, flexible employer who values work/life balance.

I do what I can for them (working at home etc) and they in turn help me out when I need time off.

I have a nursery that I feel totally comfortable leaving my children with so I can go off relaxed.

But it is difficult, today I got a call from Nursery to say ds2 was ill and I had to just switch off and leave, not ideal but I know that my boss will be ok about it.

Roll with the punches. Resistance is futile!

Know that almost everything can have a positive outcome if you look at it from another angle (this often requires someone else having a look from another angle, in all honesty, whilst you bash your head against the wall grin ).

fransmom Thu 31-Jul-08 15:48:19

realise that you aren't the only one and that there are people who are willing to help but might not want to ask in case you get embarrassed / angry/ etc......

<<kewcumber, i think you may live in my neck of the woods?>>

Blandmum Thu 31-Jul-08 16:01:38

I'm new to this. But so far I have swiftly learned

Sort out paper work on the day it arrives (I would always leave this to dh) whenever possible.

Whenever you can, do friends favours, you never know when you will need to call on them for help.

Not sure if paying for a cleaner is 'allowed' but mine is a life saver for me.

During the holidays sweeten chores with the pay off of a trip to the park/swimming etc

fransmom Thu 31-Jul-08 16:16:59

i have also kept cm from when i worked, i know that dd's time with cm will give me me-time and that is priceless for me (even if a littlebit more than what i should afford)

Earlybird Thu 31-Jul-08 16:18:31

Make plans for the weekend - either with friends, or to do specific activities. Weekends are traditionally 'family time', and I find if I have no firm plans, it is easy to tip over into feeling alone/grumpy/sad/isolated.

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