Help...I just don't know what to do....

[whispywhisp]

Both my kids are in full-time education. DD1 is 11 next week and is currently in Year 6. DD2 is almost 6 and is in Year 1. Both are very bored at school and DD1, in particular, absolutely hates school.

We moved schools about a year ago because DD1 was being bullied, quite badly, at her old school.

The work they produce is, imo, simply 'ok'. I know they could do better at school. DD1 absolutely loves reading and history. The level of history that they're doing, I don't think, is enough. I went to parents evening the other night and for a whole term's work the amount she has done is poor. DD2 seems to produce more than DD1. I feel I am 'making up' for what the school lack with doing reading/writing etc outside of school in order to maintain some level of interest in learning.

I worry that unless I grab my kids whilst they're so young and develop their intense interest in learning that they will lose that desire to learn and will simply become part of the mould that these teachers seem to want them to become.

Because of a shortage of teachers and with so many off with depression etc...DD1 is going back to school in January to be taught by the Deputy Head...nice lady but she has shown she can't control a class already and gets so stressed out in the classroom I know this isn't ideal, especially with DD1 due to start senior school in September.

What do I do? My gut instinct is to pull them out and teach them at home...give them the one-to-one education they should be getting - even if its only once a week at school - each child should have some one-to-one with their teacher/LSA even if its only for a few minutes....

Help.

[coldtits]

If both you and your children would be happy with this arrangement, I'd say go for it and why the Hell not?

I'm not a Home Educator, mine are at school. It works for us. But if it isn't working for you, and you think you can do better, it has to be worth a shot. Unhappy children don't learn much anyway, IMHO.

[whispywhisp]

Thank you coldtits...I think they'd learn a lot more with me and would obviously get far more one-to-one but my only concern would be the social side they'd miss out on - I wonder if there is any local groups we could join of other families who home-educate? I've just been sat down with both my kids and have been reading through some really lovely books we got from the library on the victorians - a subject DD1 has been doing at school - and she mentioned that she asked her teacher about how much of the world did Queen Victoria reign during her reign and she said her teacher didn't know...why on earth not? Even if she didn't know why didn't she go and find out and provide an answer to the child who clearly wanted to know? I asked DD1 if she asked the question again at a later date and her reply was 'no, because the teacher wasn't interested'...needless to say I've just looked it up in one of the library books and in there is a map of the world highlighting which bits she reigned over....not difficult is it?

I worry also what other people would think of me if we took this route with Home Ed....

[julienoshoes]

Hello whispywhisp
I have home educated my three children for nearly ten years. Youngest has just started FE college.

There are several threads, that hopefully will be useful to newbies-threads about websites on home education and books on HE.
I'll go bump them for you.
There is also one on how to find other home educators.
It does depend where you live really, many of us have a fabulous HE social life as there are other home ed families around and people willing to organise events.
Some of the more rural areas seem to be more sparce when it comes to other HE families.
And travelling costs have always been my greatest expense.

However have a look at the thread about finding other HE families and if you have no luck get back to us here, I am sure someone will try and help you find people.
Prospective home ed families are welcome to come along to our group meetings and chat, to give themselves an idea of what it will may be like.

What other people think does vary widely, as does the support they give.
Some families are supportive but very often are bewildered by a choice to HE. It is still not widely known about.
Sometimes people can see a choice to HE is an attack on their choice to use schoool and get very defensive.
I have always stated that school suits some children and parents are the ones who know what is right for their family at that time.
Sometimes people come round and sometimes they don't. If that is the case time is the only thing that may change things. As time goes by the see home educated children thriving, becoming confident articulate and obviously well educated and HE becomes less of an issue. Sometimes the most hardend detractors become vocal HE supporters!

In the end I think you must do what you feel is right for your family and never mind what others think........but you may be very pleasantly suprised

Just ask if you have any more questions.......

[musicposy]

Hi there, whispywhisp, just wanted to add my support and I'd say go for it. It doesn't sound like you have much to lose.

My younger daughter is Y6. She's been out of school since the start of Y4. My eldest is Y9 and has been out since the end of Y7. I know, absolutely know, that we're doing a way better job than school, for both of them. That's not that I am anti-school, jsut that I can see how well the home ed is working for my two.

Things like history, which you mention, my Y6 daughter has been to museums (we are lucky to have some very hands-on stuff) both with the local HE group and with us as a family. The local museum did a series of excellent workshops for the home ed group this autumn - they were excellent. We've also been to see the horrible histories show with them, and to some of the forts and castles in our area. Also, our local museum lets HE families borrow the boxes that are available to schools. We borrowed this box on Victorians that was full of lovely Victorian artefacts - but instead of just getting a quick pass round 30 children, DD2 had it all to herself! And this is just one area of the curriculum!

Learning has really come alive for both of my two since being at home. We love it!

The social side is the least of my worries (and the thing that worried me most at the start). They both have a really great social life doing so many interesting things. The only thing I'd say is it took a bit more effort on my part initially than just dropping them at school does (in making the effort to go to stuff etc).

As for what other people think...well, you'll probably get a mixture of reactions. I had some that were surprisingly positive, some that were negative but came round fairly quickly once they saw how home ed worked, and one or two, I'm afraid that have remained negative and that I don't think I'm going to ever really get past. But I figure that you can only do what you think is best for your children at any given time. Whatever those decisions are, some people will agree and some won't. Just stand by your choices, whatever they are, and most people won't say too much.

Feel free to chat to me more, especially re your DD1 as she and my DD2 are virtually the same age.

[ZZZenAgain]

poor dd1, bullied in one school, bored in the next.

Well socially, wouldn't it work if you made a point of regularly inviting the girls' current friends from the school they are at now, so they can maintain the friendships they have for a start?

Beyond that you need to find something that interests your dc I would imagine and get them to a stage where they are involved in groups. Could be music, choir, orchestra. Could be sport or dance. Could be church groups or guides. I think you will initially have to put quite some effort into this side of things but should take care of itself after a bit.

Worth a try by the sounds of things. How is dd2's teacher?

[sarahs95]

Hi Whispywhisp,

If you are prepared, or even excited about home educating, have a talk with your daughters and see what they'd like to do. The younger is perhaps a little young to understand the issues but the older will know what she wants I expect.

What occurs to me is if you withdraw your elder from primary school, you could still apply to secondary (I guess you probably have already?) This would give you a couple of terms to try it out and you could send her to secondary in September if it didn't work. If you decided to continue, then you could presumably just let the secondary school know. She would get to miss the SATS and all that pressure!

Sarah