Hellooo! How is everyone? I need your collective help please : )

[Flightybitchreturns]

How I have missed you lot

Ds is having this term off as some of you know...but the school has asked for a Dr's letter to keep his place open till Autumn. As I'm not entirely sure what he will want to do later in the year, I agreed to this rather than dereg, but it did feel awkward writing to the GP to ask for the letter as there is nothing wrong with Ds.

Anyway we went to see her this am as she asked me to bring him, and she was totally, totally hostile to the idea of him having the term off - despite it being a roaring success, fait accompli almost at this stage - he has regressed a little, which has been good for him - he has now turned five, we have been investigating the wonders of leaves with a magnifying glass, learning about bees etc, the human body - he's loving it!
But she just went on and on about the legal implications, how 'depriving him' of the social thing of reception etc etc was going to propagate a life time of avoiding things when the going got tough and did I really want him to grow up that way, and worst of all, had I spoken to my therapist about all this as though I am keeping him off because of my own issues.
I said only in a roundabout way as I do have issues, which she is aware of, but was trying hard to keep them and him separate in my mind. And that we had given school a good shot till Easter, and that I agreed that socialisation was important

She had NO idea that legally he didn't have to be in school till Sept and said she would need to check that out

I was insistent that I was happy for her notto write the sodding letter if it made her uncomfortable. But she seemed very doubtful about the whole thing, no mention even made of HE, and I now feel terrified that she will try and put a spanner in the works, report me to SS or something - get a court order to stop him being HE'd? Can she do that?
Panicking as you can tell..

Sorry to come back with such a problem. I will be catching up with you all I hope!

I am planning to change GP's soon as we're moving, but just really actually offended that she was so rude as to suggest I have my own agenda in not taking him to school - it is a separate issue that there were times last term when we didn't make it due to my depression, but I think she is intelligent to know that it's a different issue.

[belgo]

Welcome back!

I don't know much about Home ed but glad that it's worked out well for your ds this term.

Shame your GP isn't more supportive.

[Flightybitchreturns]

How are you sweetheart?

Netmums was shit by the way

[belgo]

I'm fine, just the usual pregnancy complaints!

[AMumInScotland]

I can't help about the GPs letter - I guess she has the right to refuse if it's not a medical issue.

But don't worry about the court order thing - the LEA are entitled to make enquiries if there is any reason to worry if you are providing a suitable education (once he reaches 5), but they have to give you an opportunity to explain how you are providing his education, and then if they are not happy with it they have to give you the chance to either explain more or make changes. They'd only think about court orders as a last resort if you really weren't doing anything that a "reasonable person" would think was a suitable education.

Any problems you've had with depression etc are irrelevant, so long as there's no reason to think there's any risk to your child(ren).

[Flightybitchreturns]

Gosh that is very reassuring - thankyou AMum, I was worried about the depression side - it's like a double edged sword sometimes, saying you are too ill to be working yet somehow able to care for your children and even teach them.
I will try and bear that in mind, when I meet the school and senco next week - they are also talking to me like I am an 8 year old, which is disconcerting!
The senco is to help him ease back into school life, in case he does give it another try next term. I was warned by an HEing friend that sometimes schools will try and statement a child so they remove your right to HE unless permission is given by a school, but I don't think he has anything statementable at the moment, so will be on guard!

[AMumInScotland]

Even with a statement, your legal right to HE wouldn't be affected - it's only if they are at a special school that it would have any impact. So even if they give him a statement to deal with whatever they see as his problems, you can still HE.

[Runnerbean]

depriving him of the social thing of reception

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is is with people and fing socialisation????!!!!!

The Financial Times magazine is featuring (hopefully) our group in Kent on 21st June. A journalist and a photographer spent time with us for several days and said he had SOO many pictures of all the kids SOCIALISING IN LARGE GROUPS and he didn't have any of us actually doing any work.

Ask any HE er and they'll tell you TOO MUCH time is spent f*ing socialising!!!

(rant over).

[onwardandupward]

Mummmeee, runnerbean said f, runnerbean said f

Your GP is a nightmare. Totally out of order.

In your shoes, I would get hold of a copy of the recent government guidelines relating to HE (you can easily download them I think and print off) and send them to her highlighting the bits which say it's perfectly legal and that in any case "education" is totally optional until the term after a child becomes 5.

Don't highlight, but note for yourself the bit which says that HEing is NOT a child protection or welfare issue. If she reported you to SS over this, she would be acting illegally. You would just need to get yourself in touch with the Education Otherwise legal people and they would help you drive that home to the GP and the SS in such a manner that they would never dare bother you again, frankly.

Like people said upthread, the only people who could get a court order to send your child to school would be the LA. They couldn't even start thinking about it until the term after your child became 5, and you would be given plenty of opportunity to satisfy them (by any of the routes mentioned in the government guidelines) that your child was receiving a suitable education. Nothing to do with your GP at all - she has no power in this matter, she's just an ignorant fing cow (you see, runnerbean*, that is the problem with foul language - it's catching

[Fillyjonk]

hello flight have lost your email addy but was going to email you to see where you were etc etc

right will read thread now if kids co operate

[Fillyjonk]

"Ask any HE er and they'll tell you TOO MUCH time is spent f**ing socialising!!!"

lol this is so true

though i love it atm

is this a huuuuuge problem given that we are running out of term?

he sounds like he is havinga great time.

when was he 5? this term or last ? (if this term he does not legally have to start til september)

is this school really really hard to get into?

[Flightybitchreturns]

Wow thanks guys, you are all great
Fillyyyyyyyyyyy {{{{{massive big cuddle}}}}}}}}}}
How you doing?

Well I got over the angry thing enough to ring the school again. GP had said she was going to ring them, and the medical protection something or other (I think an org that protects GP's who are signing their name to anything) apparently she is obsessive over legality, as once she got taken to court over something a patient asked her to do?
Anyway school was fine actually - I said I'd seen GP and she hadn't been happy about the whole thing, and what exactly did they need to cover themselves with the LEA and they were brilliant - said just a letter from me would do it, really - sounded quite fed up with the GP too!! ('Could she not have written something very generic' etc etc - answer, 'it would seem not!') lol, anyway she hadn't rung them so I just left it.
I'm meeting them next Thurs, should be, erm, interesting. But GP doesn't seem to be implicated or necessary, thank God.

Bean where are you in kent? I can't wait to see the FT mag!! Let us know when it's coming out and we'll all buy it!

Filly it is hard to get a place at, which is why the thing of keeping place open, but looks like they might be able to offer us that anyway...if he wants it, but he doesn't seem too fussed right now

[Flightybitchreturns]

AMum, that is really interesting and one less thing to worry about with the senco being involved etc. Looks like my mate got it wrong!
Thanks very much for your advice x

[lulumama]

no advice, but sooooo gooooood to see you xxx

[Flightybitchreturns]

[Runnerbean]

The journalist came to our group in Bromley 0-12 yrs and also went to the Gravesend teen group.
The EO media coordinator has read the article and said it was fairly neutra and objective, they took loads of pics and said it would be a front cover and 8 page spread! I suppose it depends on what else is happening in the news at the time.

[Fillyjonk]

oh am so pleased it is working out for him

even if I smell defection to netmums

we must now do what we can to comvince you to HE next term too...

[Flightybitchreturns]

I didn't really go to NM, Fills, just a whiff of them in a Google search is enough to send one running isn't it? Their 'Coffeehouse archive' has such handy tips. Can't remember what it came up on the other day, but trust me it was something you really didn't want to know about.

I mean, Coffeehouse
Teashop is different.

I'm in a quandary this morning. Just signed the tenancy agreement on a new place, which is nowhere near school. And another place we looked at over a year ago, wanted but waited too long and lost it, has just appeared on rightmove.
It is near school and near big fields too, and I don't know what to do - it would make the decision easier if he did want to go back, but if we arenn't doing school he'd also have more kids to play with as it's more a family street.
I am a bit worried that the agents will not allow us to swap, as it is their property also so in theory it might be Ok - what to do, what to do...

[Barnical]

Okay I don't know if this will help but...
We took DS1 out of school due to bullying, we were about to move counties and so I didn't see the point of sending him to another school in the area only to move and change schools again.
Xdh took me to court because I was HEing DS1.
During HE time we made sure that we had regular contact with the HE bit of the lEA and they were very very helpful! They agreed that we were doing a fine job at home and that Ds1 was getting a good educatin. Anyway when it came to court ( yes it got that far) the Judge basically through exdh's complaint out, as we had reports from the lea (bless them) sayig that DS1 was being well educated and we were meeting his needs. And that the court saw no point starting him at a new school to have to change again.

When we did move, DS1 returned to the school system 8 months later with no problems at all!

Would I do it again, even with being threatened with courts etc?? ... YES if I thought it was in the best interest of my DC's!