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Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

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Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

Home ed

Ds1 is being bullied because he is bright, school not helping, want to home-ed him and dd2 until we can get them into a new school.

42 replies

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:14

please excuse no caps, am bf.

Ds1 came home again from school today, me and his teacher have noticed he is not himself and hasn't been for a while now. we have spoken to him and he said he is being bullied. The teacher spoke to the class today and it seems that people think he is a computer geek!
I have put Dd1 and Dd2 onto the waiting list for a new school, just around the corner and it appears that Dd1 will be moving there next term, as she has a statement, but we now want to remove the other 2 until we can get them into the new school. I am willing to HE until that happens. I also believe that I will be able to get work that Ds1 will not find easy and boring.
Ds1 has had more time off school this term than ever before, due to 'stomach aches' or 'his legs hurting' (he has cerebral palsy)
Because of all this I want to find out how I go about HE and if I will be breaking any rules.

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avenanap · 19/03/2008 16:18

There are no rules, only that you are able to show that you are following the national curriculum.
He sounds as if he's thoroughly miserable, have you tried approaching the education department for advice?

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:27

ABout HE? not yet. I didn't even think about HE until my husband mentioned it and I think that it might be the only way to do this. He is miserable, he keeps bursting into tears, and looks like he has the weight of the world on his shoulder

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avenanap · 19/03/2008 16:35

Oh, poor sweetie . My ds had problems at his first school, he's very bright and was bored, not a good combination. He kept having stomach ache and diarhoea, he'd come home and cry. It was so sad. He told me he wished he was dead so I moved him as quickly as I could. He's at a private school now, I took him out of school in June of his reception year and told them he was going to his new school for asessments. I heard nothing from the Education Department. I taught him myself at home until he started the new school in September. The tummy problems stopped when he left . It's horrible to watch your child go through this. It almost broke my heart, I still get tearful when I think about how he was. You can do whatever is in your child's best interests. There are home ed groups on this site and others that will be able to help you. It will work out alright . The school usually notify the education department to tell them where a child is, they may contact you, depends on how efficient they are. I hope it works out for you and your little one.

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:40

he is 10. He was working at a year 6 level at the begining of this school year, and the teacher said that he would be working at year 7 by the end of this year. He is one of the brightest kids in his class.
He is always saying he hates his life and wishes he was dead

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Freckle · 19/03/2008 16:40

How old are your children, Sparkly?

Joash · 19/03/2008 16:43

SparklyGothKat - I have been engrossed in how to home-ed for a few months now as I am plannign on taking GS out of school in the next couple of months (need to get my OU stuff out of the way first). You DO NOT have to follow the national curriculum. I did get a lot of ueful tips from MN regarding websites and groups to look at. I will see if I cna find a link to the thread.

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:43

Ds1 ia 10, Dd1 is 7 and DD2 is 6

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Freckle · 19/03/2008 16:44

x-posts. I removed DS1 from primary when he was in Y6 because of bullying - right in the middle of SATs and because he is/was very bright, the school didn't half squeal! Made them sit up and notice when they'd faffed around before paying lip service to dealing with the bullying.

If you do decide to withdraw DS from school, you need to write to the Admissions department at the LEA. Make sure to tell them that you are only withdrawing him from the state system until a place can be found for him at your preferred school and do tell them why you are withdrawing him.

What steps have you taken to address the bullying with the school? What steps have they taken to deal with it?

avenanap · 19/03/2008 16:45

This is so sad. If it was me I wouldn't take him back tomorrow. You can get resources from the web. It's really not worth it. Would the new school take him earlier? Have you asked them? it's worth a shot.

Joash · 19/03/2008 16:46

see if there is anything useful on here

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:48

I have spoken to his teacher and the dep. head (can't stand the head) The teacher asked the class today but no-one is naming names Apparently there is another 1-2 children who are also bright and not happy either. The school is crap!!

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AMumInScotland · 19/03/2008 16:50

Hi SGK - You can remove them from school by simply writing a letter to the school to ask for them to be removed from the school's register. There are example letters on some of the sites listed here (I'll bump up the thread).

You might need to then make sure that they are still on the waiting list for the school you do want, in case they think you've changed your mind.

There are no rules about what you have to cover with them in HE, so long as you provide an education "suitable for their age, abilities, and aptitude", but you may want to make sure you keep them up to what they'd have covered in the NC if they were at school, to make it easier for them when they go back.

avenanap · 19/03/2008 16:53

There are few schools that can cater for very bright children, they all claim they can because they have to. The governments gifted and talented policy is a joke. 10% of he school? what if they are all on the same level? They are trying to stop parents moving bright children to the private schools, this is why they introduced this. They have no clue as to what it means to be teaching a bright child, the bullying that goes on, the isolation that these children have, the behaviour problems that they have because they don't feel liked.
The best thing you can do is pull him out and find somewhere else that can help him.

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:54

I asked the school if they could give him harder work (as I feel that they are not pushing him enough) and the teacher said that they can't give him harder work just extra work. I am concerned that he is getting bored too.

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SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 16:57

I wanted to put into a private school (as I believe he is bright enough for a scholarship) but Dh wasn;t happy with that suggestion lol

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avenanap · 19/03/2008 16:57

???? I went to see a school that had this policy and never went back. They should be giving him work that's appropriate to his needs. He's going to be really unhappy if he's bored aswell.

AMumInScotland · 19/03/2008 16:58

So, is the plan to continue with HE for DS1? Or would you apply to the better school for him as well? I know you were looking at schools ane getting some advice on another thread, have you found somewhere you like for him yet?

Freckle · 19/03/2008 16:59

Can ds not tell you who is doing the bullying? Ask to see the school's anti-bullying policy. They must have one and you have a right to see it. If they are not complying with it, demand that they do. If they don't, write to the governors, copying the letter to the LEA.

Trouble is, this all takes time and, during that time, ds is still on the receiving end of the shit from the other children. The LEA will follow this up with the school, but it may be difficult for them to effect changes if you haven't gone through the above process first.

flamingtoaster · 19/03/2008 17:00

SparklyGothKat - All you have to do to start home education is to let the school and the education authority know that from a certain date home education will be happening. I home educated DD for the last part of Year 6 - it was the most wonderful time and DD said she wished she had done much more of it. You don't have to follow the National Curriculum as has already been mentioned but if you are planning that DS1 goes back into the system then keeping roughly to National Curriculum for Maths and English will ensure an easy transition back. You will find that he will progress very rapidly once you start HE! There are other threads about HE but basically all you need to do is have separate pages for each child and each day note down what you did with each child. Things like normal family visits to the zoo, cooking with you etc. can all be listed. Good luck - you'll have very happy kids doing it.

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 17:01

I would be pulling them all out, but Dd1 will be going to the new school next term (hopefully, they are saying they can't take her, EDucation dept saying tough they have to because of the statement) Dd2 is on the waiting list, we were going to leave Ds1 at the current school, until all this came out. But now I am going to get him on the waiting list too.

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SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 17:03

We have a few names, but it seems that the school just 'have a word' and then it carries on.

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avenanap · 19/03/2008 17:04

Isn't this dependant on a child of the same age leaving though? you know that there may be a wait for this, will you home ed ds until there's a place?

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 17:06

Yes am willing to HE until they have aplace for them. I know that Ds1 will possibly be HE until he starts secondary school

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avenanap · 19/03/2008 17:08

Sounds like a good plan. When are you going to start?

SparklyGothKat · 19/03/2008 17:09

Am going to speak to DH about it now, and then start next term, if possible. Where can I get work sheets etc?

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