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Do you know, I am so bloody shocked at how well this is all working out...

20 replies

FillyjonkisCALM · 04/02/2008 15:24

This is not an anti-school rant. Just that I was skeptical, and for MY child, thus far, HE has worked so bloody well.

Ds is 4, "should" be in reception. But he isn't.

I had a lot of fears about HEing. I thought that he would probably show no interest in academic stuff unless we sat him down and made him learn. I thought that he would struggle to find friends. I thought we'd give it a go for a bit, seeing as how he'd a late August birthday, but probably end up sending him next year or something.

But actually, its really really working! He is happy and curious and loves learning, and that is honestly pretty much all I could possibly want for my child.

He has demanded we teach him to read and can write and recognise words and all sorts. He seems to spend his life working out mathematical rules (dp does have a phd in maths, thinking on it, this may be unsuprising ) He spends hours on electronics, drawing, making pom poms, baking...

We printed off the KS1 targets last night, because we were curious, and he can actually do most of the stuff there. So he is not behind.

Am NOT showing off. This is a child who also needs about 4 hours a day just running about and shouting and playing with sticks. We were told when he was 3 that he was probably dyslexic and possibly had ADHD

I think what is amazing me is that HE is so massively exceeding my expectations. Given that he CANNOT sit still, i can't see how he could possibly have achieved what he has in a school setting.

Oh and the social stuff-we have found so much to do that we are having to turn down at least 50% of what is on offer.

its just very exciting that it seems to be actually living up to expectations!

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bogie · 04/02/2008 15:26

good for you
Glad that you and your ds are enjoying it

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Radley · 04/02/2008 15:26

Don't really know what to say.

BUT, I'm so glad your ds is learning, and, more importantly enjoying it. I have often thought about HE myself, but we can't afford me not working.

Keep it up

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kaz33 · 04/02/2008 15:28

Wow that is brilliant, I think you made the right decision. My DS1 (5th August) has found school very hard and am now a great believer that 4 and an incy bit is way to young for boys. They can't sit still, they can't hold a pencil properly and rapidly fall into the failing category - a label it is hard to break once they have got it.

So well done for biting the bullet.

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julen · 04/02/2008 15:30

That sounds great..! Good to hear too; dd1 and ds2 are enjoying school at the moment, but I have to admit I always have HE in the back of my mind, as a back-up. Heard on the radio a while back that the biggest proportion of HE children are of secondary school age - hadn't expected that!

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FillyjonkisCALM · 04/02/2008 15:31

yes, I am not trying to convince people

I think its partly that I HAVE been a bit skeptical on here about some aspects of HE in the past, and tbh I was wrong. It IS great. And perhaps very hard to see how it would be so great before you see it in action...at least for people like me and do, who really enjoyed and did "well" at school.

But ds isn't us, and this is what has worked for him

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Julienoshoes · 04/02/2008 15:57
Grin
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greenday · 04/02/2008 16:08

Wow, I am very imprssed and encouraged and I am glad you shared that with us. My 5mth old DS was born on 31st Aug (poor thing!) and I know I will be faced with this dilemna soon. So its good to hear such positive feedback and to know that there are such options to consider.
Good for you!

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Lazycow · 04/02/2008 16:13

Filly - I recently visited a friend who is a HE'r. She has 7 children and started with her first 14 years ago, purely because he was August born and she wasn't too keen on the local school so decided to keep him home for a year and see how it went.

She never looked back and none of her children have ever been to school

I have to say her children all strike me as polite, self-assured, pleasant and generally very well-educated.

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jollydo · 04/02/2008 20:35

Hi Fillyjonk, I'm really pleased to read your post as I am thinking of doing just the same with my ds due to start in Sept. I suppose it is inevitable but I keep having thoughts of "Am I mad... Should I just do what everyone else does and send him to school?" but i really don't want to and think it would be wrong for him. So reading your story helps to inspire me to be brave and go for it!!

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workstostaysane · 04/02/2008 22:36

What a lovely post Fillyjonk,
keep up the good work

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bossybritches · 04/02/2008 22:40

So glad it's working for you all,good for you for having the courage to try it!

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PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 04/02/2008 22:42

Hello fillyjonk

you probably don't remember "meeting" me on here when I was pg last Feb or March or so - I spotted your "don't want to give birth" thread the other day and thought, oh yeah, I remember her,
she was nice Good luck with the whole, um, avoiding birth thing ;)

and congratulations on the HE. I have fantasies about it but they clash badly with my fantasies about having a job. Oh well, got a few years to sort it I guess...

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ibblewob · 05/02/2008 13:18

That's a great post, thanks for sharing. Very encouraging for someone like me who is just considering it at the mo (DS is 2.3, I'm kind of sold on the HEing but DH really isn't!).

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FillyjonkisCALM · 05/02/2008 14:02

Thank you all. And thanks for not slating me for being smug.

Even the PIL seem to be coming around to it, ds is so clearly benefiting (not necessarily compared to other kids, but compared to how things could have been him.

He both hates to sit still and loves books, counting, etc. He is the classic kinaethetic learner I think-he NEEDS to be moving to learn, the moving can be unrelated to the learning, he just cannot sit still.

hi phdlife, I was actually thinking of you the other day as I walked carefree-ly into yarns n yarns, how goes it all?

There IS a very very good local HE network, I am sure this is mainly why I've had such a positive experience . Do get in touch (do you still have my email address?) if you want more info.

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PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 05/02/2008 20:59

at walking carefree-ly into yarns n yarns!

I do still have your email but as ds is only 9m I might leave it for a bit . Anyway our plan is to return home by end of this year so will be looking into it there...

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FillyjonkisCALM · 05/02/2008 21:19

oh where is home?

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PhDlifeNeedsaNewLife · 05/02/2008 21:23

Oz - got to go live near our families now we've got ds. went home at christmas and they all adored him, think it's good for him

so, when're you having that baby???

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BBBee · 05/02/2008 21:29

that is a lovely story.

I am very interested that you were told at 3yrs he probably had ADHD and dyslexia - can I ask who gave you the diagnosis and what support you got?

Thanks

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FillyjonkisCALM · 05/02/2008 21:45

ah no it wasn't a diagnosis or anything. It was just a nursery thing, really, though the HV agreed when we stupidly went to her with our concerns . They did all give a strong impression of knowing what they were talking about though .

But thank CHRIST for MN, because otherwise, I WOULD have believed them

(actually, that is how I found MN in the first place, thinking on it...)

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FillyjonkisCALM · 05/02/2008 21:45

(or is it?)



god it is SO long ago...

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