Worried I won't be allied to HE

(6 Posts)
Agnesboo Mon 29-Jul-13 15:06:17

Hi, this may be long but I need some help wrt to my daughter age 13.
She struggled through primary until Y5 when we took her out and home educated her. When she was due to start secondary she decided she wanted to give it a go again so we sent her off. School worked with us for the first few months and she did well. She became friends with a group of girls who basically egged her on to do silly things, this escalated and she began self harming in school and accessing suicide websites during school time. She has never hurt herself at home. I've been to numerous meetings all which things were promised and never happened. I've had the police involved because DD didn't come home after school and because she was badly beaten up. The final straw was DD walked out of class bought a pencil sharpener from school and sliced her face numerous times leaving scarring. I've taken her out but not dereged yet. School have told me they can't keep her safe and they are failing to keep in contact with me.
I contacted ofsted on the advice of CLC and this triggered a social work visit. The social worker has found nothing wrong with home but I am attending a meeting on Thursday at school to discuss options. I really don't want DD going back but from the time of the letter I got today DDs support worker seems to think I will be socially isolating her if I HE. This is ridiculous as she has five siblings, afriend her age who lives next door and plenty of people are always popping in and out but hey the support worker seems to think going to school and been so scared she slashes herself to bits a better plan then keeping her safe.
I should add that she is seeing a CAMHS worker who has referred her as she feels she is on the autistic spectrum.
DD also has dyslexia, dyscalcula and dyspraxia but no statement.
I'm really worried they are going to force me to send her to school and would appreciate any help you could give.
Sorry for any typos I am typing on a tiny screen.

Agnesboo Mon 29-Jul-13 15:06:40

Allowed .... Bloody iPad changing words.

AnotherStitchInTime Mon 29-Jul-13 15:21:33

They cannot force you, once you deregister that is it so long as you can be shown to be providing an education for your child.

See Home Education UK, deregister link here. Also make contact with Education Otherwise and other HEing parents on the HE yahoo group. The yahoo group has a lot of traffic and there will be parents on there who have been in a similar position to you.

I read your other thread and as a teacher think that you would be doing absolutely the right thing to remove your dd at this time. The school clearly cannot protect her, they do not have the resources or expertise. Maybe down the line if you and dd want you could look into her going part time or to a special needs school if she does get a diagnosis of autism, but right now you have to do what is best for her needs at this moment in time.

Good luck, I hope your dd gets the help she needs.

Agnesboo Mon 29-Jul-13 15:30:50

Thank you stitch. I know I'm doing the right the thing too I'm just concerned about the support worker and her isolation comments.
thanks

Saracen Mon 29-Jul-13 15:49:33

You know the support worker is barking up the wrong tree. Or just barking.

You know school isn't going to work out for your daughter at this time. The sooner you can get it all sorted by withdrawing her properly from school, the better.

Good luck! Stick to your guns. It would take a lot more than some vague unfounded fears about social isolation to mount a legal case to force your daughter back to school!!

AnotherStitchInTime Mon 29-Jul-13 15:51:38

Many Education Officers and Support Workers will have no idea how much actually goes on in the HE community.

If you look at the left hand menu on the Education Otherwise site there are links to HE groups all over England, Scotland and Wales.

There are residential HE summer camps annually and lots of educational visits organised by parents.

My email inbox is constantly getting messages about groups, visits or other trips.

My local groups have tutors coming in for science, history, drama, fencing, all sorts of activities.

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