I don't know what to do ...

(10 Posts)
Daisy8888 Tue 05-Mar-13 21:10:54

Hi, I find it difficult to find the correct words so please don't take anything the wrong way, whoops started with a negative ...

Ok I really don't know what to do for the best so I'll start with a bit of background. I have home schooled since the start of the Jan term. The reason is Ds's additional needs and lack of support in school which led to my ds being seen by CAMHS for mental health issues .... 0/10 confidence, 2/10 self esteem, not sleeping and that sort of thing. He was in year 10 so I took him away from his GCSE's but he wasn't coping with the controlled assessments and was off sick more than at school (funnily enough the school sent a report after he left & his grades had gone up despite not being there a lot of the previous half term .... Go figure)

He has got a definite diagnosis of dyslexia from a private E.P, paed report mentioned dyspraxia but it was the first I knew (at 15). He did have a diagnosis of ADHD (Inattentive type - no hyperactivity) but due to the medication not working doc said perhaps not ADD? We (cough ... I mean me & IPSEA in that 'we') were battling with the L.A. at the time so it may have caused a nervous ricochet. Anyway CAMHS have just done an ADOS test 3 week ago and my stress may be caused by the wait ... I'm sure it'll be fine but perhaps I think that coz I may be 'different' myself & everything about ds seems normal to me.

Ahhhhh sorry no structure to my post ... I've been fighting and fighting for help in school since my ds was 7, I'm not overly impressed by the system.

Ok to the point ... My son only wants to study computers, he built one as his first home school project, he succeeded (very proud but 'very much' poorer mum) although there were ups & downs which I saw as positive learning but he didn't. The problem is that to study anything whatsoever you need to have English and maths but (to be honest) he won't get English & he hates studying maths (he was put off at some point).

I know, it's a long story to ask a simple question but ... Can you study with the open university or something like that and completely bypass the usual GCSE route. I don't think sitting his IGCSE's will be good for him as firstly he is not interested and secondly he could not concentrate for that long to do the exams.

He is an absolutely lovely boy (daydreamer), very clever (94 percentile for matrices but no idea what career matrices are in ) but he doesn't socialise apart from on-line with his friends and then the focus is on the game. We live in the middle of nowhere so I'm also worried that he will become isolated with on-line courses.

I've already had the L.A. around and I got a glowing home school report but that may be because they were delighted I 'went away' (I was after a private school for dyslexic children - loads of £'ssss), plus I wrote everything we did down.

So sorry ... I have gone on a bit ... Hope some of it makes sense to someone. P.s. I can 't reply instantly coz I've had to type this twice due to it being lost (1st version was so much better haha) so soooo much to do ... Thanks for listening

SDeuchars Wed 06-Mar-13 15:07:09

I don't know what you mean by "94 percentile for matrices", so I'm going to answer the simple question. wink

Yes, you can study with the OU without GCSEs. If it is going to be his route to a degree, he would qualify for a student loan for it.

I'm going to PM you my phone number in case you want to talk to someone about it.

Daisy8888 Wed 06-Mar-13 20:37:59

The 94 percentile was ds result for non verbal reasoning & the matrices was a subset. Sorry it all just came out in a complete ramble, I'm glad you persevered to the actual question smile

Fab news re the OU. I think I had a sudden panic due to the 'English' qualification (or lack of) blocking different routes but the mist is clearing a bit now, phew. He seems quite keen on doing a course where he could work at his own pace. All positive stuff ... Thanks

HappilyUnhinged Fri 08-Mar-13 12:07:11

What sort of computers is he interested in? If it is "building computers" that's more electronics, and if it is "programming computers" we'll that's more programming, either way he is going to need a lot of maths (more for the latter). I don't see English as a problem, but if he doesn't like maths, he's going to struggle with any higher education computing stuff.

I'd concentrate on figuring what he doesn't like about maths (it's usually down to teaching methods IMO) and fix those problems, giving him a clean path to his career choice. A love of logic is essential to doing anything worthwhile with a computer.

colettemum3 Fri 08-Mar-13 13:30:07

I would also love to know what matrices offer career wise as my daughter when she was 7 scored 99%. She has never taken that test again. But i remember the EP being shocked by it.

SDeuchars Fri 08-Mar-13 16:47:29

I suspect that they "offer" nothing, if they are part of the IQ test battery.

They may indicate a predisposition to ability in specific areas.

Daisy8888 Wed 13-Mar-13 09:36:09

Hi, many thanks for your responses.

Ds went from working at GCSE level C maths to level E in just over a year at high school (3 tier schooling system). He told me it was due to the maths becoming less about visualisation and more about calculation? He has complained for years that he didn't understand the maths but he always got really good grades so the teacher just said he didn't believe in himself.

He is spending a lot of time working on graphics at the moment ie copying bland pictures and adding shading etc. This is using his visualisation so I think I'm beginning to pick up a strength, matrices would also have been visualisation.

I think I just need to stop worrying so much and let his interests evolve smile

morethanpotatoprints Fri 15-Mar-13 21:13:20

Daisy.

Please don't worry about the maths. I'm not sure about higher maths but the basic GCSE level stuff is easy peasy. I never thought I would ever say this as only passed it a few years ago myself. It is down to the teaching 100% agree here. If I can do it anybody can. I would suggest finding out where he struggles, perhaps look for some practical ways to demonstrate the topic where he struggles.
Then once you know where you are at you can decide a way through. The ed psych who saw me said that I had shut down because I just didn't get it when explained in the way they did at school. I tried hard but it wasn't for me. Once he gains confidence he will be so proud of achieving small amounts that he will progress very quickly, believe me.
Oh sorry, I am dyslexic, dispraxic, adhd, irlam syndrome? I think thats it.
Maybe he is more creative and a kinaesthetic learner, which may make maths harder to pick up as its logical.

Daisy8888 Sun 17-Mar-13 13:45:58

Yep, I think you're completely correct, my ds didn't understand the teaching methods and the teachers certainly didn't understand him. Plus due to his extremely slow reading and writing he was always behind from the start of the lesson. The beauty of home schooling means that everything we do is on the computer and at ds's own pace smile

I'm feeling a lot more positive and I believe I was going through the following which is a quote i nicked from the special needs:children thread:

'WTF stage'. Where it has just been brought to your attention that your child has difficulties and will need support and you're in a hurry to figure out what you can do to help and feel you are racing a clock to do so, whilst at the same time trying to predict what the future will be and look for a way to make everything all right.

ToffeeWhirl Sun 17-Mar-13 18:01:44

I like the 'WTF stage'. Very true smile.

Sorry, can't help with your original question, but I'm glad you're feeling more positive and that home ed is allowing your son to learn at his own pace.

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