Pro’s and cons of a parent and child studying at the same university? Weird?

(11 Posts)
MessedUpWheelieBin Sun 29-May-16 11:14:02

Just how mad, bad, weird, or ok do you think this idea might be? Should I be worried about it?

Will staff be likely to have any issues? We wouldn't have the same teaching staff, but might well both need student services.

Different degrees, but same building, living in the same flat, both broke, me (mum) slightly worse off.

I've applied and got an unconditional offer, but a bit of a surprise to all.

Ds has done a 1st year elsewhere and was already either quitting uni, or switching subject. He can’t afford to not live at home.
He's now v.seriously considering applying to ‘my’ uni through clearing to switch subject. (one of only two accessible, offering what he’s considering.)

He’s had a year out working, and has also worked alongside me, and we get along well, all be it with a tendency to bickering if too on top of each other, too much, with no break.

I suspect it might further distance me in the eyes of some younger students, but that's life.

Disability forces me to drive in and out, so £1000 P/A saved on transport for him is one obvious pro. (if he’s on time - knows I won't be made late)

Anyone see what else may crop up and what we should maybe be thinking about?

Decorhate Sun 29-May-16 11:21:30

I think it's more likely to cramp his style rather than yours! I don't see a problem really as you are on different courses.

But then I come from a country where it is normal to live at home while going to uni if it is commutable and to go to your local uni. I am always a bit hmm at the idea here that students miss out if they don't move to the other end of the country.

NickyEds Sun 29-May-16 11:21:55

I think it will be fine and you shouldn't worry! Universities are enormous and if you're not actually doing the same degree it's unlikely your paths will cross too much (can't see it being that much of a problem even if they did tbh). Dp is a lecturer and says that staff would have no issues whatsoever with this, they probably wouldn't even know, neither would anyone else until you told them. It sounds like a good solution and will be grand! Congratulations on your offer!

Willberry Sun 29-May-16 11:26:56

I don't think studying at the same uni would be the issue, more the living in the same flat! I think it depends on your relationship. When I went to uni I needed the space to grow up and do my own thing, but everyone is different and seeing as you had the place there first I wouldn't let it stop you doing what you want to do.

saffronwblue Sun 29-May-16 11:28:23

My cousin did this when she was 50 and her daughter 19. The daughter was worried that her mum had fallen in with the wrong crowd smile

ChilliMum Sun 29-May-16 11:32:47

My mum and I did this although not the living together (I was in student house share, she lived at home) but she had a bit of a commute so she often crashed with us. My housemates loved her as she always brought plenty of wine and cooked as a thank you.
I think it also made us closer through the shared experience. I got to know my mum as a person not just as a mum and I still value that time 20 years on. We are still close.
Do it. It will be a great experience for you both.

MessedUpWheelieBin Sun 29-May-16 11:53:25

Impressed at the quick responses! Thank you.

It doesn't seem a bad idea to me, but I'm not always in sync with mainstream assumptions.

I think we're ok with not cramping each others style too much, and the issues of living together are going to be our lot regardless of studying.

NickyEDs particular thanks for asking your Dp. (and the congratulations) The building we'd both be in is a smaller annex, so we probably would cross paths quite a bit and it probably will be known as we'd be coming in and out together, but my hope was there would be no reasons for it to be an issue.smile

Saffronwblue grin

ChilliMum good to hear it worked for you both.
Your mum's a better woman than I am, I'm prepared to teach him how to cook for everyone, if someone brings me wine!

BeautifulMaudOHara Sun 29-May-16 11:55:00

I think it sounds like a sensible way to kill two birds with one stone, go for it

StinkyMcgrinky Sun 29-May-16 11:59:16

Working for a University I can't see why this would be a bad thing at all! Like a PP said, they are so big and have so many students that they won't bat an eyelid about having mother and son there together. One of my close friends works in the same building as me but on the floor above, we haven't managed to catch up with each other for weeks let alone bump into each other in the corridor! If you're doing different courses you'll both be too busy to find yourself in the same area regularly.

Go for it! Good luck smile

MessedUpWheelieBin Sun 29-May-16 14:48:58

Looks like if he manages it, it isn't going to upset others. Thank you. smile

DumbDailyMail Sun 29-May-16 21:52:05

I don't think it would be a problem at all. Even if you were in the same building I doubt you would run into each other that often and even if you did I'm sure it would be fine.

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