Spent some of his hall fees already

(93 Posts)
Moominmammacat Thu 05-Sep-13 17:38:22

I put £2,000 in my son's bank account to pay his hall fees for his first term at uni later this month. Warned him not to touch a penny of it ... he's already spent £600 of it on nothing in particular, meals out, travel, coffee ... what would you do?

MultumInParvo Thu 05-Sep-13 17:40:22

Pay his fees direct next time?

gamerchick Thu 05-Sep-13 17:41:23

Take the rest off him before he spends the lot and pay them direct.

Silverfoxballs Thu 05-Sep-13 17:41:28

Dsis had her DS totally splurge 3k by Christmas when he was in his first term.

I would pay his fees directly myself and he would be working his arse off redecorating my house, cleaning my car doing gardening etc if he did not have any way to pay the money back.

callamia Thu 05-Sep-13 17:42:11

Warn him to start looking for part-time work.

Get the rest of the money back and pay the fees directly yourself and make him pay you back the £600 in whatever way he can.

That is shocking.

SilverApples Thu 05-Sep-13 17:46:22

Did you know he was crap with money?
Explain a bit further, is he going to be asked for £2000 straight away, or is it monthly?
DD gets a tuition loan and a maintenance loan, will he be getting a ML in a couple of weeks?
I'd let him stew until he realised he was going to have to beg.
I'd also set up internet banking transfer, between your account and his. Then you can drip as little as possible into his account.
And I'd be very pissed off at his immaturity and stupidity. What sort of Christmases and birthdays do you have? I'd be recouping from those.
He's being an idiot.

creamteas Thu 05-Sep-13 17:48:56

That depends:

1) If it is uni halls, leave him to it. He will need to find the money to pay and the bill is in his name. Part of going to uni, is taking responsibility.

2) If private halls and you are a guarantor, then pay direct next time.

fussychica Thu 05-Sep-13 19:18:03

This takes me back to that thread about students being adults and parents should butt out. When you're shelling out this much cash it's not an easy thing to do.
Agree with creamteas

amumthatcares Thu 05-Sep-13 22:01:20

Wow shock - My DD has worked pt for nearly 2 years and budgeted her own money, including running a car, but I don't think I would trust her enough to put £2000 in her bank....most of them just don't appreciate the value of money and at that age, it just burns a hole in their pocket.

DD has a relatively low ML and so we will top it up, but will do it on a regular, weekly basis. If she pisses it up the wall spends it all in the first 2 days, she will starve for the next 5. She'll soon learn!

mumeeee Thu 05-Sep-13 22:13:16

We are paying for DD3's halls direct the same as we did for her sisters.? She will be paying for everything else herself out of her loan. She is in her room at the moment trying to work out how much sje'll have to spend week,

Moominmammacat Thu 05-Sep-13 23:05:46

We are paying his hall fees, including food. He is not taking out a loan. We asked him to earn £1000 a term during his gap year to help him in his first year. He has had plenty of time to do this through tutoring, babysitting etc. he may have earned some of the money but he certainly hasn't saved any of it.

SilverApples Thu 05-Sep-13 23:30:34

Then get him to apply for a loan next year.

mumeeee Thu 05-Sep-13 23:30:45

All 3 of our DDs have taken out a loan. We wouldn't have been able to pay for rent and food.

creamteas Thu 05-Sep-13 23:35:27

He can still apply for the loan this year.

So in your shoes, I would just leave him to it. He can either borrow the money or get a job to pay for his hall fees.

WoundUpWanda Thu 05-Sep-13 23:41:26

He should be taking out loan, paying his rent and budgeting it.

You paying his rent now will do him no favours, and he clearly has no respect for your money if he pisses 600 quid away that easy. A couple of hundred, few nights out and some meals- a bit more understandable, freshers can get carried away- but 600 quid is A LOT.

Make him take out the loan, and loans for the rest of his years- and if you so wish to help him, give him the saved cash after he has graduated as a congrats for a 2:1/1st present 'here's a head start in paying off those loans'

Lethologica Thu 05-Sep-13 23:44:09

Oh dear! shock. I would be furious. Does he have anything he can sell?

I would be worried about freshers week. sad

mumeeee Fri 06-Sep-13 00:47:00

Woundupwanda a loan doesn''t cover rent,food and all other living costs.That's why we pay for halls, I do agree that the student should budget for everything else including food. DD2 who wasn"t very good with money before she went to uni surprised us and budgeted very well.

Moominmammacat Fri 06-Sep-13 05:14:49

I don't want him paying the horrific interest on the loan when he should be able to manage without one if he is sensible. But at the moment, he isn't so maybe he will just have to stew ...

SilverApples Fri 06-Sep-13 05:39:14

Bless. You don't want him to have to pay back a loan.
Then he will continue to spend your money like water, and be confident that you will bail him out, because you can afford it, and you won't ask him to pay anything back.

DD has both loans, her maintenance loan covers her rent almost exactly.
We give her a thousand a term for living expenses, quarter bills, food, transport, clothing etc. She has learned how to manage, and how to pinch in one area to splurge in another.
DS will be less competent when he goes, so he'll work on a monthly budget, or weekly.

JGBMum Fri 06-Sep-13 07:36:38

1. Take the £1400 that's left back.
2. Tell him he is to repay you at £200 per term
3. Deduct the £200 from what you were going o give him each term.

Most students will be managing on less than £1000 per term, and will have to buy food with that. In your shoes I would be giving him a max of £800 per term, less the £200 to pay back, so £600 from you to last him until January.

Otherwise he's never going to learn the value of money.

happycrimblechuckie Fri 06-Sep-13 07:44:47

My DS loan covers his rent exactly so unless he works he will starve, bit like me and his Dad good god why are you not letting your son grow up and be a responsible adult, mind you if you had put 2 grand in my account this early I may have spent 600 quid, did you not think where his money was coming from for meals etc..

amumthatcares Fri 06-Sep-13 08:27:32

I don't want him paying the horrific interest on the loan But he will still be paying the 'horrific' interest on his tuition fee loan won't he? He'll pay the same level back once he's earning, whether it is on just his tuition loan or both. I worried about my DD having 'too much debt' but once I realised they will take the same amount off her regardless of how much she owes, I stopped worrying. Chances are, half of them may never pay it all off anyway.

BeckAndCall Fri 06-Sep-13 09:10:05

£2000 is a hell of a lot for hall fees for one term! That's £6k per year - way more than I've paid for my two so far in their catered halls. And more than I'm paying for youngest next year too.

Could it be he knows exactly how much he needs and has spent the rest because he could?

If he's this bad with money, I'd pay the hall fees directly and then give him a monthly allowance for the rest ( if that's what you are planning to do). Form my experience though, overall, £6k per year is not enough to live on ( assuming hall = approx £4k). But if he should have earned money to supplement that and hasn't, he's already in trouble. That's what student loans are for, maybe?

Moominmammacat Fri 06-Sep-13 09:40:00

Right, thank you for all your sensible comments. I'm as outraged as you all are. I have taken all the money off him, will pay hall fees directly (they are £5,500 a year, catered en suite). He's out busking now and has to pay back the £600 by the end of the month and will then get £50 a week, by bank transfer, paid weekly. If he wants any more, he can earn it.

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